Chapter 36  Lone Rhinoceros

We're  including the lyrics to the song we've attached to this chapter, Lone Rhinoceros, by Adrian Belew - a wacky musician most of you have probably never heard of who I used to listen to several years ago,  and who I've seen live a few times in small venues in Burlington, Vermont and Boston, Mass.  The song fit well and since some of you don't (or can't) listen to the songs, I wanted you to at least read the lyrics and maybe see the connection and message we were going for.

I'm a lone rhinoceros
There ain't one hell of a lots of us
Left in this world

I stand alone in my concrete cell
Where people stare and toss me Coke cans
I guess it's better than being poached
But I'd give my horn just to see my homeland

I'm a lone rhinoceros
There ain't one hell of a lots of us
Left in this world

They say I am ugly,
Call me a beast
I hear them snicker
When I'm half asleep
Is beauty such a big commodity
I always heard it was only so deep

I'm a lone rhinoceros
There ain't one hell of a lots of us
Left in this world

I know the zoos protect my species
They give me food, collect my feces
But I can't help it, I miss the past
I'll never again see my good old mudbath  

Payton

"Where's Master Matthias?" Ashton asks Lane as we all get out of Tommy's car.

"We already said our goodbyes," Lane replies, "Daddy doesn't like scenes....haha!" I smile as he laughs at his own joke. "Well, you know, not goodbye scenes, so he left for the office a few minutes ago. He left a list of things to say to everyone though," Lane adds while waving a piece of paper. Tai, who is the closest plucks it out of his hand.

Clearing his throat, Tai reads the list in a deep voice, trying to imitate our Head Dom's authoritative tone.

"There is to be absolutely no drinking in, around or near the van. No drinking and then driving. If I find out you have, and trust me I will find out one way or the other, punishment will be given. No drinking if you're even a passenger in the van. No driving with anyone who has been drinking. Lane is the only one legally allowed to drink anyways and I know he will not be drinking during the drive, which means none of you will even be drinking on this trip. Right? Right. No driving tired, if you're tired, stop and take a rest before you continue. Lane has my credit card if you need to get a motel room along the way. No irresponsible behavior or acting in any way to cause anyone harm or embarrassment. Have fun, but conduct yourselves in a manner befitting your training and membership of the Red Door. Even when you are away, you represent the Club and your Doms. Be safe at all times and in all ways and I'm sure you all get the meaning of that. If there are any problems at any time, call me immediately. If you don't have my cell phone programmed into your phone, do so immediately."

"Wow Tai, you sounded so much like daddy I just popped a boner," Lane says sounding slightly dazed. "Mind if we make a quick stop at the club before we head out on the highway?"

"NO!" We all shout.

"Does he really expect us not to drink on this trip?" Ashton asks with a raised brow.

"Nah, he knows we're going to. I'm sure he's just thinking we're not going to so he doesn't worry as much. I already promised him I wouldn't get drunk. Remember guys, you don't need to be drunk to have a good time!" Lane says surprisingly serious making us all nod along.

Chris and Ashton are pulling our bags out of the trunk so Tommy and I go to help.

"Okay Payton," Tommy says as we finish packing them into the van, "who's up first for driving."

I pull out my chart. "Lane, with Chris as his navigator-slash-driving buddy. Me and Tommy will be next up, so we'll sit in the middle row and Ashton and Tai can snooze in the way back."

"Thank god," Ashton mumbles tiredly.

"So Lane and Chris will swap after two hours, then after Chris' turn, we'll rotate and Tommy and I will move up as drivers, Ashton and Tai will move to the middle seats and Lane and Chris to the way back to snooze..."

Just as I finish Chris grabs the schedule out of my hand, "Do you have bathroom and food breaks....wait, oh my god, you do."

"Shut up," I say as I grab the schedule back, good thing I laminated it when I was working at the library office the other day. "We'll stop for food and the bathroom every four hours when we rotate driving pairs. Rotating drivers keeps everyone fresh. If you have to pee in between you can do it when we do the 2 hour switchovers."

"I think it's great Payton," Tommy says as he climbs into the middle row of seats.

"Me too," adds Tai as he crawls into the back, so I give Chris a smirk causing him to roll his eyes. I look at Ashton and he's shaking his head chuckling.

"Wow! Lane's packed a ton of snacks too! Ash, we get to sit right by the food!" Tai yells from the back seat.

"That should be enough to tide us over until lunch," Ashton says looking through the window as Tai looks through a large plastic bin full to the top.

"Does anyone need to use the bathroom before we go?" Lane yells as he starts to jog back to the house. Ashton and Chris follow him while I look back and forth between the car and house trying to figure out if I have to go.

"I'm gonna try," I mutter to the others as I follow them because I know if I don't as soon as we get driving down the road I'll have to.

Ten minutes later everyone is in their seats and buckled up, Chris is plugging in his iPod and putting in the first of his road trip playlists as Lane pulls out of the driveway.

"Spring Break 2016 begins!" I cheer.

"Woot woot!" Everyone hollers as Tommy hands around bottles of cold water.

"I think it's so cool that Master Gideon is paying for Disney and Master Matthias basically the rest of the trip," Tai muses after we've been on the road for a half hour and we all murmur our agreement.

"Well, it's not entirely true," Lane says, biting his lip.

"What do you mean," I ask.

"Ummmmm....I'm kind of not supposed to say."

"Spill it Wilder," Chris orders.

"It's not just Matthias and Master Gideon, other Doms chipped in too."

"You're serious?" Tai asks, "like who?"

"Master Ken," Lane answers, grinning at Tai. "Master Kael," he adds with a glance at me, "Master Casey of course..."

"Why didn't he tell me?" Tommy blurts out.

"They all wanted it to be kept a secret, they were having a drink with Matthias and I a couple of weeks ago and I was telling them about our trip and how daddy rented a van and a condo and Master Gideon covered all of Disney and they said they wanted to help too, make sure we had the best Spring Break possible. I'm not supposed to say anything though because they don't want you to feel like any of you owe them special favors."

"Who else?" Ashton asks.

"Master Clark, Master Rowan, Master Shane, Master Ryan..."

"This is fucked up, I don't need anyone paying for my vacation," Chris grumbles.

"That's because you have a good job Chris, the rest of us are struggling students. I think it's really nice, don't you Payton?" Tai asks.

"Yeah, sounds like something Master Kael would do," I reply, slightly stunned.

My own parents didn't even offer anything when I told them I was going to Florida instead of home for break, not that I would have taken it anyway since I'd been saving up money from working at the library, but I can't believe the Doms care about us having a good time, though all of the ones Lane mentioned shouldn't surprise me, "but Master Rowan? Really? Why?"

"Hey, under the asshole exterior, he's really a nice guy. He just wants love like everyone else, unfortunately he doesn't click with any of the Subs at the club so he thinks rotating them will eventually make one of them click," Lane laughs, "but Payton, you might be even more surprised by who else chipped in?"

"Who?"

"He made me swear not to say anything," Lane starts.

"But you can keep a secret about as well as Tommy," Chris teases.

"Hey!" Tommy shouts.

"Hey!" Lane mimics and then laughs. "I can keep a secret when it's important, but in this case I thought it was important that Payton know."

I could feel my face getting warm as everyone looks at me, even Lane peeking at me through the rear-view mirror.

"Who?" I ask, just to get it over with.

"A certain tall, dark and handsome cousin of Matthias."

"Remy?" Tommy asks and I bite my lower lip as I look out the window.

"Yeah, he paid for 1/6th of the condo, gave me money for gas and food and made me promise to keep an eye on Pay and take care of anything he needs," he replies. "Now Pay, I'm not going to be your watcher, but I still think it was sweet."

"Awwwww," Tommy and Tai say together.

"He shouldn't have," I mumble, "we're not together...and..." And I've done nothing but reject him, I say to myself.

"It doesn't matter," Lane says, "he wanted to and he didn't want you to know, so don't say anything. Anyone," he adds in a more commanding voice he probably learned from Master M.

"He seems to really care about you Pay," Tommy adds, "Sometimes people deserve a second chance."

"He didn't have to do that," I groan, feeling guilty. "And just because he did doesn't mean we're going to be like you and Casey," I say to Tommy. "It doesn't work that way. He acts this way now, but he'll move on to someone else, probably have another sub by the time we get back, I'm just attractive to him because he can't have me. The minute that changes, he moves on to some other sub."

"He hasn't played with anyone since he joined the Red Door," Lane says from the front seat, "just sayin'."

"Can everyone just stop," I groan, not wanting to be the center of attention and not wanting to talk about my love life (or lack of one) anymore.

"It's okay Pay," Ashton says from behind me, "if it doesn't feel right, it doesn't feel right."

I nod back at Ashton, finally, someone who gets it.

"Sorry Pay," Tommy says quietly.

"It's okay Tommy. I'm just not ready for a heavy relationship, I don't think I can handle the pressure, the expectations; I like things as they are. No strings attached."

No getting attached, I add in my head, and no getting hurt. I still cringe to myself when I think about how Lane said he heard him having sex with Fabien after I left that night. But why shouldn't he have. Fabien was his submissive. They had a contract. I was just some stupid kid he met at his cousin's club. I was an evening's amusement. Besides, once a Dom, any guy for that matter, gets to know me better, they'd just find out I'm not that interesting, not that sexy, I'm just an average looking, boring guy and they'd dump me. I'm saving them the trouble and me the pain by just doing the one night stand thing.

Everyone quiets down once we get off the topic of the Doms. Chris and Lane speak quietly up front with the radio low while Tommy pulls out a book. I glance back and Ashton looks like he's fallen asleep and Tai has ear buds in listening to his own music, bopping slightly in his seat.

I close my eyes and lean my head against the backrest. Maybe I can fall asleep for a little while...and not think about...him. I try to clear my head, think about the Doms I was with last night....or Master Kael. Master Kael can be fierce and scary one second and kind and caring the next. He's the Dommest Dom I know, besides Master Matthias. Tommy and I have this rating scale for Doms, with Master Matthias at the top, since he's like the most dominant, sometimes scary and controlled Dom we know, not to mention huge. Size does matter. Casey is somewhere in the middle of the scale, despite his size, he's more like a big teddy bear, according to Tommy that is. There aren't many Doms at the Red Door who would be at the bottom...I grin to myself, 'bottom', Ha! Anyway, so Master Kael comes right after Master Matthias, then maybe Master Ryan...then maybe Master Ken? Or Master Gideon? Nah, he's kind of a softie I guess, on the inside, definitely not on the outside. Master Clark is really nice, but still pretty Dommish...Master Rowan thinks he's scary, but he's not...where would Remy fit? No, no...doesn't matter, not thinking about him. Master Saber! He's right up there after Master Kael, and the rest of the Foursome? They have their own scale.

I try to imagine what it will be like with Master Saber...I let my mind drift off...

My eyes pop open when I realize that somewhere along the way my daydream fantasy switched from Master Saber to Remy and I squirm in my seat, my jeans uncomfortably tight in certain areas.

"You okay Pay?" Tommy asks.

"Yeah. I think I'm too wired to sleep." I pull out my phone and start playing Two Dots. That can usually keep me busy for a while and my focus off a certain tall, dark and handsome Dom. A Dom who went so far as to give Lane money to make sure I had a great time in Florida...oh shit, fire dots, fire dots...

Tai

"Oh my god oh my god, look! Ashton wake up, this is for you baby!" As soon as I see the first signs for Disney I start getting excited. It's been a long night of driving and we're all a bit worn out, but now that we're here, I'm like the Energizer bunny.

Last time I was here I was 12. I remember being overwhelmed by it then and it hasn't changed. The place is huge.

Tommy, Chris and I are the only ones who have been here before, so it will be cool to see how the other guys like it. And Disney isn't just a kids place, it has something for everyone, so I know they'll love it. We'll only be here a few days before we head down to Miami, so we'll have to pick and choose the parts we want to see. You could be here a week and not see everything, but we can always come back next year. Maybe the guys will want to make this a yearly tradition! Maybe one year our Doms will come with us. I smile to myself, Master Ken? Somehow I don't think this is his scene...and then it hits me...thinking about the future and thinking about Master Ken. Will he be in my life even one year from now?

I really have no idea. Not one particle of an idea. He's so hard to read. Tommy thinks I should just come out and ask him how he feels, where he sees things going, but I don't know. I guess I'm afraid of his answer. Is he even the kind of guy who would want a committed relationship? Or even a relationship outside of the lifestyle at all? Why does he keep things to himself so much? Is he really that closed off or is that just his personality.

I think that's just the way he's wired and I would have to learn to deal with that. It's so different than me. I wear my heart on my sleeve, I let everything out...to my friends at least. Could I be with someone who held everything in?

"Navigator?"

Tommy's voice pulls me out of my thoughts and I see Payton shuffling through papers looking for the directions to the hotel.

"Make a left up at the next light," I tell him.

"Wow, you really know this place?" Payton asks.

"Nah, we just passed a sign for the hotel," I chuckle.

Ten minutes later we turn into the huge parking lot of Animal Kingdom Lodge, the hotel Master Gideon chose. I smile at Ashton whose eyes are wide as he looks around and his grin is off the charts.

"Oh my god, this is so cool!" Payton says after a few moments of awed silence in the car.

"Unreal!" Tommy, who's in the driver seat, replies.

"What do you think Ash?" I ask as he cranes his neck out the window, looking at the savannah area where giraffes are walking toward a grouping of trees. I watch the way their bodies move so gracefully even though it looks like it would be awkward to have such long necks. One of them nips at another and they begin to run as if chasing one another. It's like a beautiful slow motion dance and I feel mesmerized by their impromptu show.

"It's pretty dope," he says calmly, but I know him and he's excited.

"Lane, Chris, wake up! We're here!" I shout. Lane grumbles in reply and Chris doesn't move except to hold up his middle finger.

"Seriously guys, this is awesome," Payton yells back. "There are giraffes over there and zebras...do you think we get to go close enough to pet them?"

"Nah, they don't let the guests past the fence, they want to keep the animal's environment as real as possible, all that human contact would be too stressful on the animals," Ashton explains.

"That makes sense," Payton agrees.

Tommy pulls up to the front door of the hotel and we pull into a temporary spot so we can check in and unload out bags. It's 10:45 in the morning, so we're hoping our room will be available for an early check in.

Once we've checked in successfully we lug our bags up to our room, or suite I guess; it's two rooms together - a large bedroom with two king size beds and a kind of living room with kitchenette that has a pullout couch. So two of us in each bed and two to share the pull-out couch, pretty luxurious to what we had originally planned. While I wait my turn to use the shower, I quickly text Master Ken to let him know we're here.

I see Tommy laughing at his phone as his thumbs move at the speed of light over the screen and I know he must be texting Casey. Ashton's got his phone out too and Lane is talking on his with Matthias. Chris of course claimed the first shower and I look over at Payton who's sitting on the windowsill looking at our view with his head resting against the side. He turns back looking around at everyone and then his eyes come to rest on me, my phone poised in mid-air.

He gives me a small, resolute smile.

I walk over and put my hand on his shoulder. "Whatcha looking at Pay?"

He looks back and points to a part of the savannah where there's a small man-made pond, or mud bog.

"A Rhino. Cool, eh?"

Ashton

"Wow," I whisper while looking out at the view from the balcony.

This place is amazing. I never thought I'd be able to step out onto a balcony and watch zebra and giraffes grazing. A smile tugs at my lips as I lift the camera and snap a picture. Looking down at the picture with a smile, I turn my attention back to the animals. I've always wanted to visit Africa so I can go on a real safari and see lions, cheetahs and other big animals. Maybe one day, Gideon and I will be able to go. After taking a few more pictures, I go back into the hotel room and close the door behind me. The guys are still getting ready to go out for the day. I don't know why they need an hour to wash up and get dressed. I plop down on the comfortable couch that Chris and I are sharing. It doesn't take much longer for Lane to come out dressed and with his phone pressed against his ear. From his side of the conversation, I can tell he's speaking with Master Matthias. Maybe I should call Gideon. He's probably working though. I'll just text him.

A: Hey Gideon, just wanted to say thanks again. This hotel is amazing and I can even see the animals from the balcony!

It takes a few minutes before he replies.

G: I'm glad you like it Little One and please, you don't have to keep thanking me. It was my pleasure. I just want you and your friends to have the best time possible.

I smile as we keep texting back and forth while I wait. Telling him about the drive over here, I roll my eyes remembering just how loud Chris blasted the music when he was driving. He always does that and I always get a headache. I like music as much as anyone, but there should be a rule that a person should be able to hear their own thoughts over the music. With Chris, that's not possible. About ten minutes later, Gideon has to get back to work so we say our goodbyes for now. I put my phone back into my pocket just as Chris and Payton walk into the living room area.

"Everyone ready?" Lane asks as I twist the lens on the camera.

"What do you have there Ash? Since when do you have a camera?" Chris questions making me stand up.

"It's not mine. Gideon let me borrow it for the trip so I can take pictures. I'm sure they'll be better on this than me taking them on my phone." I shrug and raise a brow as he smirks at me.

"You two are awfully close nowadays Ashton," he says teasingly, making me roll my eyes.

"Whatever, are we going or not?" I huff while looking at Lane who shrugs.

"I'm waiting on you guys," he says so I nod and walk over.

"Let's go!" Payton cheers excitedly while popping up next to me. "This is going to be awesome, right Ashton?"

"Right," I agree with a smile and he grins brightly.

Once Tai and Tommy come out of the room, we all leave the hotel and head for the center of the Animal Kingdom to see where we can go first. We decide to just walk there instead of getting a shuttle so we can take a look around as we go slowly. Once we step outside, the sun beats down on us. I cover my eyes and squint to see better. It's too early for it to be this hot. Reaching into my shirt pocket, I grab my sunglasses and put them on as I follow Lane and the guys down the walkway. I stay to the back of the group and after a few step, Payton falls back to my side.

"What are you excited to see most?" he asks curiously, but I just shrug.

"I honestly don't know. I don't know what to expect so I'm looking forward to seeing everything," I tell him while looking around.

"Look over there Ashton!" Chris shouts and I follow his finger that's pointing to the entrance of the Africa section.

"Let's go on the safari!" I say before running forward.

"Ashton! Wait for us!" Lane shouts as I race past the entrance and look around at the makeshift village with a smile.

"Wow," I gasp while lifting the camera and snapping pictures of the people playing some type of drum.

Looking over my shoulder, I gaze through the crowds in search of the guys. Lane runs into view and others follow. Ignoring Tommy's rambles about us having to stay together, I continue walking through the village towards the safari entrance. I wonder if they have real lions. That'd be awesome. When we get to the entrance of the safari, I remember what Gideon told me before we left and wonder if it'll really work. I tell the worker that my name is Ashton Raines and he looks down at a clipboard. Not even five minutes later, the guys and I are getting led to a car that will take us out.

"Look at you Ash, all important and shit." Lane drapes his arm over my shoulder making me scoff.

"Far from that," I mutter while shaking my head. "Are there lions out here?"

"There are, but of course they are kept separated from the other animals so they don't hunt them," the guy who is driving states.

"Like with a fence?" I frown, I hate to see wild animals caged even if the cage is large.

"No, there is an 18 feet deep, 21 feet wide hidden moat that keeps them from getting into other areas. There is no need to worry, everything and everyone is perfectly safe and happy here at the Anima Kingdom." He smiles as I lift my camera and gaze through the lens.

"Happy," I whisper to myself.

Are they really happy here or are they just used to being here?

-----