– Thursday, May 31st, 2018 –

I'm a bit slow today, my head feeling heavy, even though I kept quiet after Monday's date with Finnley. After the events in front of Club Seven, we continued our date, me trying to push the memories that kept flashing in front of my eyes to the back of my mind.

We had a nice date, and while I tastes sushi, some flashes came back, but it was about me, eating sushi with Stan once. That most definitely disappointed Finnley a bit, but he recovered quick after I told him my relationship with Stan is in the past, and we were there to make new memories together.

Because I want to be with him, not Stan.

It was actually nice to talk to Finnley about things that haven't got to do with any of the events that happened in the past two years. No abductions, no car-crash, no fights, no nothing huge.

He told me how he is in college, wanting to go to university after finishing the first year – which he obviously isn't doing this year – and then become a doctor. He explained how he first thought about becoming a psychologist or even psychiatrist like Nathan is doing, but when he had to pick, the physical medical scene attracted him more, and now he wants to become a doctor, working in the ER the most, since he got inspired by things that happened.

I continued to ask him if I followed my dream to become an architect, and he confirmed, telling me I was doing building technologies in college too, and telling me Oliver was supposed to graduate this year, failing to do so too due to the accident.

I learned some things I forgot, but Finnley assured he was allowed to tell, since none of it would interfere with my mind trying to process traumatic events in its own pace.

We talked about me starting to play soccer again, in a team with Oliver, Jaimie and Felix, and how the team was on their way to become champion, until Oliver and I got the accident and they lost their best defender and me, as one of the best offenders.

It had been little snippets of unimportant information that he gave, but I still felt satisfied, for getting some insight to the gaping hole in my mind.

But, we both were exhausted afterwards, and for the past two days, we mainly stayed in bed, or hung around on the couch, watching movies, playing videogames for as long as my head would let me, or even read. The latter activity mostly meant Finnley was reading, and I just watched him in silence, or he read to me, which I surprisingly enjoyed too.

But it isn't a surprise, because I could listen to him for hours on end and I wouldn't care less if he would be blabbering incoherent things, as long as I would get to listen to him.

I've been carrying the black box with the ring in my pocket, constantly playing with it, and with the idea to just kneel down and ask him to marry me. Something's holding me back though, and I can't pinpoint out what it is.

"No, Finn." Mom sounds upset, tired even. "I can't agree with it. What you're doing is going against everything the doctor told us, and Cristian. His mind needs to do things in its own pace.

"I'm not doing anything. But he's been asking about Emma for three weeks already. He needs to understand why she's not here to visit him. He feels miserable because she isn't supporting him."

"I already told him she simply isn't capable, he doesn't need to know why. He'll remember if he needs to."

"And what if he doesn't?" Finnley suddenly sounds upset, panicky even, and I stop in my tracks to listen a bit better. I shouldn't eavesdrop in on them, but I can't help they decided to argue this loudly, knowing I'm upstairs with the door to my room open. "How am I supposed to explain?"

There's a silence, and I think, whatever the hell is means, Finnley's question got mom thinking. What is there to explain?

"I'm taking him, whether or not you agree, I don't care."

"Finn!" Mom calls out a bit shocked. "I said no. No means no."

"I don't have much more time to explain..."

"There's plenty of time."

"It's only three months, and I'm not going to wait until the last minute. He deserves to know."

"Know what?" I asks, as I shuffled to the top of the stairs, finding them in the hallway, Finnley holding two bottles of water, mom holding her hair with both hands.

They both look up, Finnley's face softening as soon as he finds me, mom biting her lip. "Nothing, honey..."

"We're going to visit Emma." Finnley cuts her short, and I find it highly amusing to see him this way. He would've never go against my mom.

"We are?" I do feel some excitement about that fact, because I have no idea what happened between me and Emma. All I know is that we disagreed on my relationship with Stan, but that ended shortly after that. For all I know, we had been thick as thieves still.

"No, Finn."

"Well, I have a scheduled visitation today, and on Saturday. Either I take him now, and you know about it. Or I take him on Saturday, when you guys are out. Or, if you'll stop me then, I will find another moment to take him there. He will see her, and he will find out. I don't care if he remembers anything, he needs to know."

Mom takes in a very deep breath, shaking her head disapprovingly. "Cristian, I'd advise you against visiting her right now. The doctor clearly told us not to put you in situations that might shock you and this is one of them."

"How could meeting Emma be shocking?" I stare at her with wide eyes. "Did something happen to Emma?"

"Cris, don't ask questions, please. This is all hard enough as it is already..."

"For you, huh?" I snap at her. "Do you know what it's like to be on my side of this story? If you tell me meeting Emma could shock me, than I even more so want to see her."

"See?" Finnley waves with a victorious smirk on his face. "Cris wants to go."

"And Cris doesn't get to decide..."

"I'm twenty, I do. And we're going." I already descended the stairs, pulling on my hoodie at the bottom. "Let's go Finn? Who's driving?"

"Eh, Sam is." Finnley scratches his head. "You don't remember him but he is in your class and he was one of your best friends."

"Okay, cool." I shrug, not caring less if it would be the reaper driving me towards Emma. I want to know what is going on. "I'm sorry mom, but I'll be fine. I can handle more than you think."

She sighs, defeated a bit. "Just... Finn?" She turns to him. "Call me, if needed, I'll come."

"I will, I promise. Thanks Mrs. Evans..."

"...Maria."

"...Maria." Finnley smirks, grabbing my hand, opening the front door to reveal a running car in the driveway with a guy lounging against the side of it. "We'll be home soon."

* * * * *

Sam casually introduced himself to me, not acting hurt or whatever over the fact I forgot who he is. He simply started joking around during the ride, pretending as if we just met, and telling me things about himself.

I find out he's in my soccer team too, we always did projects in school together, and he's best friends with Alex, which is how I got to know Alex in the first place. After about 45 minutes in a car with him, I can tell why we became great friends. We share the same humour, he's overall really outgoing and cheerful, a bit hyperactive too.

Finnley seems to like him too, so that's a good thing I guess. I wish I wouldn't have forgotten about him, because I'm sure we would've spend more time, and he would cheer me up in bad moments without much effort.

But the goofing around stops, as soon as we drive onto the parking lot of a prison building, and my jaw drops as it becomes clear this is our destination for today.

"Finn, what the hell? She's in prison?"

Finnley clears his throat, awkwardly a bit, and leans forwards, looking towards Sam after he parked the car. "Can I talk to Cristian in private before we go in?"

"Sure dude, no problem." He pulls the keys out of the ignition, handing them to Finn. "I'll go grab a smoke and just lounge in the sun a bit."

"Thanks, Sam." Finnley smiles gratefully, and takes Sam's seat behind the wheel after he left the car.

"Finn, seriously? Emma is in prison?"

"Yeah, she is." He seems sad, uncomfortable, nowhere near as adamant and strong as back home. "I wanted you to know and see for yourself. Because I'm not sure you will really believe me otherwise."

"Of course I won't believe you!" I cry out, staring at the building in shock. "What did she do?"

"Well, official charges... there's more, but the main was being an accomplice to sell me."

"What!?" I snap my head back to look at him, my heartbeat picking up speed. "Emma helped selling you?"

"Yes, but, Cris?" Finnley grabs my hands, squeezing them hard. "She was a victim too, okay? I'm not going to tell you she is innocent, because she wasn't. But they used her in her weakest moments. She's mentally ill and they used it to get her to do things she wouldn't have done otherwise, okay?"

"But she helped selling you!?"

Finnley rolls his eyes, though one corner of his lips curls into a smile. "Stubborn ass... he squeezes my hand again. "She isn't innocent, she's accepted her punishment, I didn't fully forgive her, but I understand. And she told me you were starting to understand too. You visited her a couple of times."

"I did?" I frown, scrunching my nose in disgust. "Why would I?"

"Because you wanted her to answer some questions, and the answers she gave you made you realise she was sorry, she accepts the punishment because she knows she deserves it." Finnley shrugs, shortly looking towards his watch. "There's more, but promise me you'll let me explain and answer your questions after the visit. Else we'll be late."

"What's more to come, Finn?" I mumble annoyed, shocked, already tired to no end because of the huge shock I still need to process.

"Just promise to listen to me, okay?"

"Okay, I promise." I nod in agreement, simply because he proved me it is worth listening to him, to trust him, to do what he tells me.

"Thanks." He smiles, and gets out of the car, locking it as soon as I got out too. We hand the keys back to Sam, who tells us he'll wait outside, before Finnley takes me inside.

He makes me read the rules of visitations, signing us in in the mean time. We leave our stuff behind, he buys a bag of candy from a vending machine and makes sure he's allowed to take it with him, before we follow a guard down a hallway and into the visitation room.

There's rows of tables, and behind one, Emma is seated, her head dipped low, while she's nervously fiddling with her fingers, every so often eyeing the clock on the wall.

"Em." Finnley notifies her of our presence, and her head snaps up, her eyes surprised, a small smile breaking through on her tired face.

"You came!"

"I promised, I don't break promises. I just had to wait..." He eyes me shortly. "He doesn't remember anything from the past two years."

"Oh, shit..." Emma bites her lip nervously. "So he doesn't know..."

"Nope..." Finnley's face flushes a bit, and he's still standing beside the table, while I kind of expected her to jump up as soon as she saw us. But she didn't and in the short awkward exchange of words, I looked at her, realising she looks... bad. Tired, bags under her eyes, and a pale skin.

"Cris?" Finnley grabs my hand. "Emma and I need to tell you something, which is why I mainly took you here now, and not later."

I remember how he asked mom how he was going to explain later, and how he only had three months left.

And as soon as Emma gets up, her belly shows, and my jaw drops yet again. Now I get what he meant by only three months left.

"You're having a baby!?" I whisper scream at her, before it dawns me that Finnley clearly said theyneeded to tell me something. "Wait, what?"

"It's mine..." Finnley drawls awkwardly.

"Bu... but..." I can do the math. It's May, she's three months away, which means she got pregnant late 2017. "We were already dating..." I stare at Finnley, emotions and thoughts raging through my mind, anger getting the upper hand.

"It's not his fault..." Emma starts, and the only reason I do not shout or yell, is because the rules clearly tell us to keep it down. I don't want to get arrested for shouting at Emma or Finnley right now.

"It's not his fault?" I hiss in anger, slumping in a chair defeated. "It takes two people to get pregnant, Emma."

"Yes, it does." She shares a look with Finnley, who seems unsure on how to act. "It's Finn's kid, but he didn't want to..."

"What?" I shake my head feeling highly confused, Finnley slowly sitting down next to me, not daring to look at me.

"I sort of forced him..."

"No, Em..." Finnley groans, leaning his head onto a hand tiredly. "I told you to stop doing that. You didn't want to either, Jeffrey talked you into it."

Who the hell is Jeffrey?

"But I wanted to, didn't I?" Emma seems confused because of Finnley's words, and it confuses me a bit too.

"That doesn't mean you would've raped me. I was there, and he talked you into it."

"Guys?" I snap at them in anger. "This was about me and telling me what I forgot, right? Not about you two bickering if yes or no Emma raped you. Did you, or did you not want to sleep with her?"

"I didn't. They made me." Finnley mumbles with a bit of a tremble in his voice. "But it's my child."

"So, you did not cheat on me."

"I didn't."

"He really didn't." Emma jumps in again. "It's messed up, I know..."

"And what's going to happen after you give birth to a baby? You're in jail. When are you getting out?"

"I was sentenced to four years..."

"No probation possibilities..." Finnley turns and grabs my hand. "Are you angry at me?"

They're not answering my real question, and it's frustrating me.

"What? No!" I cry out, squeezing his hand with a bit too much anger in it. "I'm angry at people doing this to you!"

"I'm sorry... for what it's worth..." Emma starts in an insecure tone, casting her eyes down.

"It's worth nothing." I slump down in my seat and cover my face with both hands. "What a mess..."

"We do need to talk about this, Cris." Finnley whispers, leaning closer. "I'll explain more about Emma's role in everything later."

"I want to go." I mutter. "I can't be here right now."

"Okay, we'll leave." Finnley grabs my hand again. "We'll go now."

"I'm really sorry, Finn." Emma whispers sadly, before turning to me. "And I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you too."

"We talked already, Em." Finnley sends her half a smile, not that sincere. "I can't fully forgive you. But in time..." He shrugs. "I understand."

"I know, and for you to understand..."

They share another awkward smile while I can't even look at her right now. She forced my boyfriend to sleep with her, and she got pregnant because of it.

I remain silent until we're back in the car, Sam now with us, sending me worried looks too.

"Cris?" Finnley pulls me in his arms, as I did decide to sit next to him on the back seat, feeling a bit defeated. "We need to talk, because I want to raise the child."

* * * * *

A/N  So, Finnley told him about the baby, what are your thoughts about Finnley wanting to raise it? And Sam made an appearance again! Yay! #FanclubSam

Okay, another question. How would you react to the news if you were Cristian?