"All we have is now."

- Unknown.

The sky was beautiful - the twinkling stars freckled on it, the moon shining bright and it's light making even darkness look beautiful. We laid side by side, she gazed at them with awe and mine were on her, she was my favorite thing to look.

I knew it, in the depth of my heart what she meant to me. It was wrong but everything about it felt right. Little by little, she became the reason for my smiles and dreams, I longed to be with her and my heart dropped every time when the reality revealed that we don't belong together.

It was going to be Anika and Rohit, always.

And I was never going to see Tia in the same light. Last night, in the punishing silence of my room at midnight, I realized that Tia deserved someone better. Someone better than me who didn't look at everything as gain and lose. I can pretend but just like every other girl, she deserved her prince charming and a fairytale happy ending. I was never going to make her happy, the only thing I could do was to buy things that made her happy.

I was going to break things off with her, the next day, I decided.

"Shivaye?"

I was lost in my own thoughts that I forgot about the angel beside me. We were at the park, a few blocks away from our actual destination.

"Yeah, Anika," I mumbled, tilting my head towards her.

"What are you thinking?" She asked, looking at me with her innocent eyes.

You.

"Um, nothing. Just things, business to be specific." I lied, glancing away from the galaxy in her eyes.

"Oh, I was thinking about my mother...I just wish she was here with me." She said, her smile fading.

"She is always with you, Anika." I squeezed her hand and she smiled, appreciating it.

"She is?"

I couldn't help but smile at how adorable she was. "In your heart."

"It's strange. I feel like I have known her my whole life even though she took her last breath when I breathed for the first time. I know, from the stories and pictures, that she is beautiful inside and out. Dad tells me a lot of things, how excited they were for me. My mom had a feeling that it was going to be a girl and how dad used to always tease her. She was ecstatic but she didn't even get a chance to hold me in her arms, I wasn't blessed to feel the warmth and love of a mother. I just...miss her." The pearl-shaped tears rolled down her cheeks and my heart clenched at the sight of it.

I entwined our fingers together, "It is just how life is, Anika. Nothing is in our hands, the only thing we can do is live through it and hope that everything is going to be okay. And your mother would be proud of you, she may not be blessed to hold you in her arms or lull you into sleep but she was blessed to give birth to a beautiful daughter to this world before she said goodbye. You turned out to be an amazing person and that's all she wishes for, to see her family happy."

I didn't realize that my hands were wrapped around her, taking her in a tight hug as she sobbed into my chest. "I don't know but I hope so."

"I am here, Anika," I mumbled into her hair.

"I don't know, Shivaye. Everyone is leaving, leaving me alone. It was mom at the beginning, she bid goodbye to the world when I whispered hello. then, it was the man who I thought was going to bring light to my dark life but...he too left leaving me broken and now, my da-"

She broke down, her face in her hands as tears stained her cheeks. "Anika, listen, I am not going to leave. I am here to stay, with you. You are worthy of everything in this universe, just don't do this to yourself." I held her face and my thumb wiped the tears.

Anika was broken.

She wasn't happy.

She hid her secrets and scars behind the happy face.

And all I want to do was kiss away her tears and tell her a thousand times that she deserved the world.

We stayed like that for a long time in the peaceful silence of the night.

"Let's go home, we don't need to attend the occasion," I pulled her up, giving her a small smile.

"No, I promised you that if you take me to the park, then I will come with you to the party. Anika doesn't break her promises, let's go." She sheepishly smiled, taking my hands in hers and walking towards the exit of the park.

Just like that, the Anika everyone knew was back.

"Are you sure? It is not important." I unlocked the car and she slipped into the passenger seat.

"I am positive. What kind of a friend are you, if you don't attend your friend's birthday party?" She raised an eyebrow.

I shrugged, "I can just call or text him, not a big deal."

"Are you going to do the same for my birthday too?" She crossed her arms, her lips forming into a cute pout.

My hands paused on the steering wheel, "I wouldn't miss it for anything because you are special."

She turned crimson, gazing out of the window.

I don't know what held in the future for us, Anika and I but only I could hope that in the future, we were together in a blissful journey.

We pulled in the driveway of a farmhouse which was turned into a club. It was ecstatic, I can feel my heart beating to the loud music and different lights fell on us. Anika took a deep breath beside me and I regretted taking her along with me.

It wasn't a party for us.

"We can leave, Anika. He won't mind," I tried to convince her but she shook her head and stepped out of the car.

She grinned, "I won't mind as long as the police don't reach us because it seems like a high school party."

I sighed, "I didn't know it was going to be like this, that boy was always crazy."

Keeping my hands on the small of her back, I steered her towards the entrance. The smell of alcohol hit me right there, ignoring the teenagers filling the dance floor, I walked to a less crowded place.

"You okay?" I asked her, slipping my hands into the pocket.

When I was met with silence, I turned to look at her. She seemed lost, her eyes distant as she stared at a wall.

"Hey, Shivaye. Glad to know you could make it." Karan Malhotra slapped my back, a grin on his face.

He pulled me in for a hug, "Happy birthday, mate."

"Thanks, bro." He smiled, his eyes looking at Anika curiously.

Karan and I were business partners turned into friends. He wasn't there because of his passion but for his father who forced him to take the company. Now, he has followed his passion and was working as a trainer. He was a senior version of Rudra.

"You bought a date," He stated, looking at me with mischief.

"Meet Anika, my best friend." I placed my hand on her waist as she smiled and wished him.

He kissed her knuckles, slipped his charming smile. "Thanks, my lady."

"You're welcome," She gave him a tight-lipped smile and looked at me. "Um, I will be back soon. Just going to the restroom."

"Do you want me to -"

"No, no, I will be fine on my own."

Before I could say something, she disappeared into the mass of people.

Karan looked a little guilty, "Sorry, If I made her uncomfortable."

"Hey, it's nothing," I told, more like I assured myself.

When Karan updated me on his life, the only thing I could think about was her.

Where is Anika?

It has been more than ten minutes and yet there was no sign of her. I excused myself, searching for the pair of brown eyes but she was nowhere to be seen. After five minutes of trying to find her, beads of sweat formed on my forehead and I called out her name but there was nothing except for the music.

She wasn't in the restroom, the kitchen, the dance floor, the backyard and every corner where I checked.

My heart was beating in fear, fear of losing her and at that moment, I wanted to hold her in my arms, to know that she was safe.

I took the stairs to the first floor, my lips trembling and body shaking as I opened the locked doors. She wasn't in it, at least not in the first five rooms.

I took a deep breath, shaking all the negative thoughts in my mind and closing my hands, I opened the last door.

She was safe and well, I hoped.

But I forgot to breathe from what my eyes witnessed.

No, this couldn't be happening.    

I know many of you are waiting for an update and some of you might have gave up on this story. It's just that I longer have an interest to write anything and the forced words don't give me any kind of happiness. I am trying, the next chapter will be here as soon as possible. Thank you so much for your patience and support, bless you endlessly for your love and stay happy ❤️