After about a week, things seem to die down a little. Coach suspends Luke from the team. Coach doesn't care less about this "media bullshit", and says at long as I'm playing good hockey, nothing else matters.

Sam comes over and we study. Or really, he reads War and Peace out loud as I flip through old comic books. It's finally starting to get warmer outside, and the snow is mushy and glistening under the sun.

We walk around the neighborhood. We watch old movies. I don't know how to do this. I feel like there's so much pressure on me all the time. I don't know how to do this? 

"We can know only that we know nothing," says Sam, his eyes flickering quickly across the pages. His voice is soft and woven. "And that is the highest degree of human wisdom."

I'm sitting beside him on the floor, our backs against my bed. I turn my baseball over in my hand, feeling the worn leather under my fingertips. "Deep."

"Yeah, deep."

"Tolstoy might know what he's talking about."

"Maybe." Sam shuts the book gently and pulls it in towards his chest, stretching out his legs. "Anyway. What's for dinner?"

"What, you want to make eggs for everyone?"

"Funny."

"I think we're ordering Chinese."

"Alright."

I glance sideways at him. He's looking down at the book. His eyelashes are long, and his hands are tucked in the sleeves of his green sweatshirt. 

"How's your uncle?"

Sam picks at the corner of the pages. "He's okay. He's been going to the doctor twice a week."

"He'll be okay."

"Yeah, he'll be okay." I don't know if he means it.

My phone buzzes on my desk, and I reach over and grab it. It's an email from school.

"Beckett, Cameron exam grades," I read out loud. Shit. I forgot about exams. I unlock my phone and read the rest of the email, random sentences of information jumping quickly into my brain. 

"Pre-calculus..." I squint at the screen, then look up at Sam. "B-?"

Sam's eyes widen with happiness, and a smile curls across his face. "A B-?"

"This can't be right." I push the phone in Sam's hands, and he reads it for himself.

"Cameron!" he says, laughing. "You got a B- in math."

"I got a B- in math?"

"You got a B- in math."

"Shut up." 

He laughs again. I love it when he laughs. "That's amazing," he says.

I smile. "Well, I had a good teacher." 

Maybe I should kiss him. I want to more often than I do. But sometimes, I don't want to at all. I don't know how to do this. I still feel wrong sometimes. Does that make me a bad person?

~

After dinner, he and Hailey take the telescope out for the first time. The sky is clear and scattered with bright stars, and satellites wink down. I do homework in the kitchen, but even from there I can hear their muffled laughter. I glance up, and out the window I can see Sam kneeling beside Hailey, pointing to the sky. I smile, a little.

~

In the hallway the next day at school, someone is standing by my locker as I slam it shut. 

"Hi, Trina."

"Hello, Cameron," Trina says cooly. She adjusts her glasses and flips a strand of straight, black hair over her shoulder. "Um, I heard you and Sam were... dating."

"Yeah. Sorry, am I distracting him?"

I didn't think it was possible for Trina to blush, but she does, a little. She clears her throat. "I'm, uh, sorry about that."

Now I feel bad. "It's okay. What's up?"

"I just wanted to say... I'm glad Sam's happy. And he's happy when he talks about you, so."

"Sam talks about me?"

"I still think he should be focusing on his studies right now, but... I mean, with all the universities shoving scholarships down his throat, I guess it's good that he's having fun."

I shift my heavy stack of textbooks in my arms. "Like, the University of Toronto?"

Trina raises an eyebrow. Shit, she is so much better than me at that. "That was just one."

"There are more?"

"Yeah." Someone calls her name from down the hallway, and she glances over her shoulder. 

"I gotta go," she says, turning back to me. "I'll see you around, Cameron." 

She marches off before I can reply, her flats clicking loudly on the floor. I watch her walk away until the crowd of students block my view.

~

"Hey, Sam."

"Cameron!" His voice is pleasantly surprised on the other end of the line. "What's up?"

"Where are you right now?"

"I'm at school, setting up for astronomy club. Why?"

"Just wondering." I'm lying on my bed, tossing my baseball lazily into the air, pressing my phone against my ear. "I was just curious... Trina said something to me today about you getting a lot of scholarships."

There's a crackle that spits through the phone speakers, and I wince.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"I said, Trina talked to me today about scholarships that you're getting."

"Oh. Cameron, I'm kinda busy right now. Can I call you back later?"

"I didn't realize all these universities were contacting you."

"Does it matter?"

"I don't know, does it?"

There's a long silence, and Sam sighs. "I'm not going to take them."

I sit up. "Sam."

"Cameron, I'm gonna call you back."

"Sam. Wait."

"I need to be here for my uncle."

"What about NASA?"

"That can wait."

"Sam..."

"Cameron, you don't understand."

"Explain it to me, then."

"Tom is all I have left. I can't just leave him."

"I'm here for you, too."

"Yeah, but soon you'll be in a different city with the NHL."

I'm pressing the phone tightly against my ear, struggling to find the right words. "Sam."

"I'll call you later."

He hangs up. 

He doesn't call me back later.

After dinner, I walk over to his house with my hands in my pockets. Melting snow crunches underneath my boots. I knock quietly, and it's over a minute before Sam swings the door open. His eyes are sad and his cheeks are flushed.

"I'm sorry," I say. "I'm sorry, Sam."

"It's okay."

"I just want what's best for you."

"Okay."

"But I know you're going through a lot. I'll support you if you don't take the scholarships."

His face crumbles slightly, I put my hands on his cheeks and kiss him, pulling him closer. I don't know how to do this, okay? Sam is so smart and I don't want him to do something stupid. But I like it when he laughs, and I like it when he's happy. 

A/N okay now we actually might be nearing the end a bit. I do not know how to pace stories people lol. I don't want this to be too short or two long! comment your thoughts