Dan and I walked home together, my hand still in his. I couldn't explain what I was feeling, like, a deep friendship, yet more. I had never found myself attracted to a guy before, but I wasn't opposed to it. I decided not to think too much about it, and just enjoy the moment.

When we arrived to my house, there were three unfamiliar cars parked outside. I waved goodbye to Dan and made my way inside, where I heard some voices in the living room. "Martyn?" I called out.

"Phil? I thought you were out with a friend."

"Yeah, I left like three hours ago. Who's here?"

"Don't worry about it. Go to your room."

I walked into the kitchen to get food, ignoring Martyn. He showed up in the kitchen a couple minutes later. "I told you to go upstairs." His eyes were bloodshot and he had a strange smell coming off of him.

"Oh my God, are you high?"

"None of your business." Martyn said angrily.

"Uh, yeah, it is my business. You know better than this, Martyn! What would Mum say?"

Martyn threw the cup that I had filled with milk on the floor. "SHE'S NOT HERE. WHAT DOES IT MATTER WHAT SHE WOULD THINK?!"

"JUST BECAUSE SHE'S NOT HERE DOESN'T GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO DISAPPOINT HER!" I yelled back.

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE, PHIL. NO ONE WANTS YOU HERE. YOU'RE JUST A LOSER THAT NOBODY WANTS."

"Fuck you," I said quietly, before picking up my backpack and heading upstairs.

"I said get out."

"It's my house, too. You can't tell me what to do."

Martyn grabbed me and threw me against a wall. "Whatever happened to the little brother who does as he's told?"

"He grew up." I loosened myself from his grasp and walked out of the house.

I wasn't sure where to go, so I went across the street to Dan's house and knocked on the door. A boy who looked vaguely like Dan, but younger, opened the door. "Who are you?"

"Adrian!" I heard a woman, who I presumed to be Dan's mum, yelled and came to the door. "May I help you?"

"Uh, I'm Phil, I live across the street, I'm a friend of Dan's."

"Oh, why don't you come in! Dan's in the shower right now, but you can come in and wait for him." I thanked her and followed her inside. "Would you like anything to eat or drink?"

I declined, and sat down at the table she told me to sit at. "I had met your dad just after you moved here. I'm sorry about your mum."

"Oh, no need to be sorry, but thank you."

"How are you liking Florida, Phil?"

I thought for a second. "It's alright, just very different from England. I kind of miss it."

Dan's mum smiled. "I know exactly how you feel, it takes some getting used to. But this is a good place to live."

"I thought heard you here," I saw Dan standing in the hallway. "What's up?"

I sighed. "Family issues."

"Oh, well, you're welcome to stay the night if you want to." Dan offered.

"Thanks, I think it would be a good idea."

We went to Dan's room, and he handed me some clothes of his. "These should fit you. Do you need to shower or anything?"

I nodded, and he showed me where the bathroom was, and I took a quick shower and came back to Dan's room, and saw him laying on the floor. "Turn off the lights, I wanna show you something, Phil." He told me. I turned off the room light and lied next to him on the floor.On his ceiling were what I would conservatively estimate to be hundreds of those glow in the dark stars. "A week after we moved here," he explained, "I went to a dollar store and bought these. I got them to remind me that things aren't so different here as England. We all see the same stars, the same sky, the same sun. People are still people, even if faces and names change. They comforted me when I would lay awake at night, thinking about home."

I stared at the fake stars and thought about what Dan had said. _Are the stars I see the ones you walk among, Mum?_ I thought, wishing that she could answer.

"I'm sorry," Dan said, breaking my thoughts. "About your mum. My mum told me. That's terrible what happened, I can't imagine. I'm so sorry."

I shrugged. "It's not your fault."

"I know, but I'm sorry. You don't deserve that, nobody does."

"Thank you."

"Phil?"

"Yeah?"

"You know that it's okay to be upset, it's okay to cry about it. But you can't let it hold you back. You still have to live, you have to move on, and you can't keep your walls up forever."

I took a moment of courage and held Dan's hand like he did earlier. "I think I'm learning to live again."