Thea

"Thea? Thea, are you listening to me?"

I looked up and saw Kuya PJ's restless eyes behind his cracked glasses. Tumango-tango ako kahit pa parang namamanhid ang buo ko kong pagkatao. 

I kept remembering what happened to Nash and Missy. How am I going to explain to their parents what happened? Will it happen to us to? What about my parents? Are they with Kuya? Are they safe? Are they looking for me too? Gusto ko nang umuwi.

If only I just listened to them. If only I stayed at home with them.

"Sina Mommy at Daddy... okay lang din sila 'di ba?" Hindi ko napigilang maiyak ulit. "Kuya, gusto ko nang umuwi. Ayoko na rito."

Hinawakan ni Kuya PJ ang kamay ko at inilagay dito ang flashlight niya. 

"As long as you're okay, they're okay too," he said and gently patted my head. "Thea, I'm going to need you to be brave, okay? Just keep running. Kahit magkahiwa-hiwalay tayo, takbo lang nang takbo."

Napakagat ako sa mga labi, pigil ang bawat hikbi.

All five of us were still cramped up the office ceiling, waiting for the noise outside to subside.

"Harry, dahan-dahan lang." Narinig kong sambit ni Ate Avril. Pabulong man, tila ba may halong pagbabanta sa boses niya habang pinapanood si Kuya Harry na tinatanggal ang takip ng ceiling.

Dumako ang tingin ko kay Ate Avril. Her eyes were swollen; mascara tears running down her cheeks. However, she didn't look scared or sad anymore. In fact, she looked furious. Like she was ready to burn everything down. She was even holding a long pair of scissors in her hand. I didn't notice when or where she picked it up.

Ate Avril saw the love of her life die right in front of her just minutes ago, but she managed to get herself together. I felt envious. I wanted to be brave, too. Just like her.

Dahan-dahang sumilip si Kuya Harry sa takip. A streak of light from the wooden creaks hit his cheek, and when he finally removed the cover, his face lit up with relief. "Wala na sila. Pwede na tayong bumaba."

And so that was what we did. One by one, we slowly came down. Kuya Harry was the first to jump down the floor. Inalalayan niya kaagad si Ate Avril, at pagkatapos ay si Ate Chyna naman na pigil din sa pag-iyak. 

When it was Kuya PJ's turn, he looked at me and smiled. "Takbo lang nang takbo, okay?"

I found myself smiling back at him as I nodded. "Mahahanap natin si Kuya Smoeki at Ate Jordan."

As soon as Kuya PJ jumped down, I hurriedly followed. Being the only one left, I was more scared of being alone in that ceiling.

Inalalayan ako ni Kuya PJ. Nang tuluyang makababa, nagulat ako sa gulong nadatnan. It was as if the entire room was ransacked by a bunch of thugs. Some computers were still running, while others were all smoked up. Even the CCTV cameras were destroyed!

"Let's go." Kuya PJ said as he picked up a neon green backpack from the floor. Isang strap lang ang sinabit niya sa kanyang balikat dahil may dinukot siya mula sa loob—another flashlight and a roll of rope. He did all this while walking to the door, following Kuya Harry's lead.

"Thea, bumabaha na sa labas. 'Wag kang bibitiw sa lubid. Hindi tayo dapat magkahiwalay," sabi pa ni Kuya PJ sabay abot sa akin ng isang dulo ng lubid na hawak niya, ang kabilang dulo naman ay nanatili sa kanya.

"I promise I won't let go." I held on to the rope as tight as I could. Gusto ko sana itong itali sa bewang ko, pero naisip ko si Kuya PJ. I didn't want to slow him down if anything bad happens.

We moved as swiftly and silently as we could under the directions of Kuya Harry who mainly communicated with hand signals. Dahil ako ang nasa huli, panay ang libot ko ng paningin sa paligid.

"Shit." Bahagaya akong napasinghap nang mapansin ko ang tubig sa sahig, hudyat na bumabaha na. The hotel was already renovated to fix flooding issues. Kung nakakapasok pa rin sa lobby ang baha, paano na lang kaya sa labas?

The thought of the flood made me held on to the rope even tighter. 

"Takbo!" Bigla na lang sumigaw si Kuya Harry nang pagkalakas-lakas. Para kong sinabuyan ng sobrang lamig na tubig. Kung hindi lang tumakbo si Kuya PJ, baka nanigas pa rin ako sa kinatatayuan ko.

"Kuya, wait!" Napatili ako nang biglang lumiko si Kuya PJ sa isang hallway, imbes na sumunod kay Kuya Harry, Ate Avril, at Ate Chyna na tumakbo patungo sa main exit door. Gusto ko mang sumunod sa kanila, hindi ko na magawa dahil sa mga aninong nakita kong tumatakbo patungo sa amin.

Pagkatapos kaming lumiko-liko sa mga hallway, biglang huminto si Kuya PJ sa isang fire exit door. Pagbukas niya rito, nagulat kami nang sumalubong sa amin ang rumaragasang tubig-baha na hanggang hita ko na. Pareho kaming bumagsak sa sahig, pero wala sa amin ang bumitiw sa lubid. Kung pwede lang talagang manatili na lang kami sa hotel... 

"Shit!" Kuya reached for the door handle, holding on to it as he tried to pull himself up. Lumingon siya sa akin at nakita kong sinundan niya ng tingin ang backpack niya na tinatangay na ng tubig baha pagkatapos itong mabitiwan.

"I got it I got it!" I screamed proudly as I caught the bag and slid the strap to my shoulders. 

We both got up, and before we knew it we found ourselves wading through the dark floodwaters as fast as we could. 

"Don't let go!" Kuya PJ kept screaming. 

My mind was running in circles, terrified for a lot of reasons. It was still too dark even if we were already carrying flashlights. Kung saan-saan ako lumilingon. I was scared of the violent people who could still be chasing us, but I was more terrified of the rising floodwaters and pouring rain. For the love of God, malapit lang kami sa dagat! What if there are sharks na natangay? Or mga jellyfish? Or what if anurin kami sa mismong dagat? We were warned about storm surge, is this it? Mas ligtas ba kami kung nanatili na lang kami sa hotel?

"Kuya!" I kept crying out. Oo nga't hindi na masyadong malakas ang buhos ng ulan, pero napakalakas naman ng hangin at may mga tumatama pa sa aking kung ano-anong bagay na hindi ko alam. Sa sobrang higpit ng hawak ko sa lubid, sumasakit na ang kamay ko. 

Namalayan ko na lamang na hanggang bewang ko na ang baha at tinatangay na ako nito palayo kay Kuya PJ. Gusto kong bitiwan ang backpack para makagalaw ako nang mas maayos pero baka magamit ko itong flotation device kung sakaling mas tumaas pa ang baha.

"Shit!" Napatili na ako nang bigla na lamang namatay ang ilaw ng flashlight na hawak ko. Hindi ko namalayang masyado ko itong nailublog sa tubig.

"Don't let go!" Kuya PJ screamed again. Kahit papaano ay nakikita ko pa siya dahil sa flashlight na hawak niya.

I could hear Kuya PJ struggling to fight the current and lead both of us to safety. He was also in so much pain but he wasn't letting go of the rope. He wasn't letting go of me. I cried, heartbroken that he had to suffer just to keep me safe. 

Pabigat nang pabigat ang katawan ko at pakiramdam ko'y namamanhid na ang dalawa kong kamay na nakahawak sa lubid. 

How to stay safe and survive in times of emergencies. They always taught us about it at our school every year. Sa sobrang daming beses, hindi na ako nakikinig dahil akala ko alam ko na ang lahat. Pero nang mga sandaling nasa bingit na ako ng kapamahakan, walang kahit na anong pumapasok sa isip ko kundi pagsisisi at galit sa sarili.

"Thea, watch out!" Biglang umalingawngaw ang napakalakas na sigaw ni Kuya PJ.

"Watch out for what?" tanong ko, pero huli na dahil bigla na lamang may kung anong tumama sa aking isang napakalaking bagay.

Nalublob ako sa tubig. Tinangka kong umahon para makahinga pero hindi ko magawa dahil sa lubid sa kamay ko. The rope was caught up in something and it was preventing me to move. Sa sobrang desperado kong makahinga, napilitan na akong bumitiw mula sa lubid.

Pag-ahon ko, wala na akong kahit na anong makita. Rinig ko ang sigaw ni Kuya PJ ngunit palayo nang palayo ang boses niya.

His voice started sounding further and further away, until I could no longer hear it. I was terrified, but in the end, all I could do was surrender at the current to conserve my strength.

***

Hindi ko alam kung milagro ba 'yon o sadyang sinuwerte lang ako. Pagkatapos kong magpatangay sa tubig, sinubukan kong tumayo at nagulat ako nang mapansing nasa hanggang tuhod ko na lang ito. Sinamantala ko ang pagkakataon at dali-dali kong binuksan ang bag ni Kuya PJ. Kinapa-kapa ko ang laman hanggang sa naramdaman kong para bang may mga glue stick sa isang compartment nito. 

There was no way Kuya PJ would have a glue stick in his bag kaya naman dali-dali ko itong inilabas. Binali ko ito at tuluyan akong napahagulgol nang lumiwanag ito. It wasn't a glue stick! It was a glow stick!

"Lord, thank you! Lord!" Nanginginig man sa sobrang taranta, ginamit ko ang kulay dilaw na liwanag ng glow stick upang makita ang iba pang laman ng bag. Ganoon na lang ang tuwa ko nang makitang may isa pang flashlight sa loob. 

Gamit ang flashlight, nagawa kong makita ang daan palayo sa binabahang parte ng isla. Part of me wanted to look for Kuya PJ and the others first, but I was scared that the rising flood would catch up to me—worse, those violent people again. I know that I was being selfish, pero inisip ko na lang na kung nakaligtas man ako, siguradong nakaligtas din sila. I mean, they were clearly more capable than me. More capable than I'll ever be.

I continued running again, this time with one destination in mind—home.

***

It was the first time I got so tired, my body felt like it was going to shut down completely. It felt like my lungs would fall off. Like my heart would burst any minute. But honestly, my mind couldn't care less.

I was desperate to go home and see my parents again. Part me didn't believe Kuya Smoeki. Part of me felt that I can find mom and dad at home. And I will be safe there, with them. I'd rather be with my parents that be at some dumb party again.

Parang umaapoy ang mga paa at hita ko. Hindi ako sanay na tumakbo nang malayuan pero sa sobrang desperasyon ko, hindi ko ininda ang sakit at tumakbo lang ako nang tumakbo. Nahinto lang ako nang gumegewang na ang mga paa ko't tuluyan akong bumagsak sa putikang daan.

In that moment, it felt as if I lost all of my sense of shame. It was the first time I didn't care about what others would say or think about me. I didn't care if someone would take a video and post it online for some silly internet points. I was too desperate to go home that I just started crawling. 

I crawled and crawled, even if it meant dragging my body across the mud. I just wanted to go home to my parents again.

"Nababaliw ka na ba?! Tumayo ka diyan!"

Narinig kong may sumigaw. Mula sa pinanggalingan ng boses, tinutok ko rito ang direksyon ng flashlight at nagulat ako nang makita ko si Mang Senggo na lumabas mula sa isang eskinita, tumatakbo patungo sa akin habang palingon-lingon sa paligid.

Takot na takot ako kay Mang Senggo noon, pero nang mga sandaling iyon ay wala na akong pakialam sa kanya. Gapang lang ako nang gapang lalo't isang kanto na lang ang layo ko mula sa subdivision namin.

"Lintik na bata ka! Parating na sila!"

Nagulat ako nang bigla na lamang hinawakan ni Mang Senggo ang braso ko at sinimulan akong kaladkarin. Nagpumiglas agad ako at nagsisigaw, pilit na hinahampas sa kanya ang bag ni Kuya PJ. "Bitiwan mo ako! Uuwi ako! Mama! Papa!"

"Walang magulang na gustong umuwing bangkay ang anak nila! Para sa mga magulang mo, bumangon ka diyan!" giit ni Mang Senggo, tila ba nagngingitngit sa galit. 

May kung ano sa sinabi ni Mang Senggo na nagpabuhos ng mga luha ko. Pilit akong tumayo pero sobrang sakit talaga ng mga paa ko kaya tanging iyak lang ang nagawa ko.

"Shhh! Wag kang maingay!" aniya at bigla na lamang akong kinarga. Gamit ang nanginginig na mga kamay, tinakpan ko ang bibig ko at pilit na nagpigil ng hagulgol.

Naramdaman ko ang pagtakbo ni Mang Senggo. Wala akong nagawa kundi pumikit nang mariin at kumapit sa kanya.

"Bilis! Buksan mo na!"

"May nakasunod ba sa 'yo?! Teka, Senggo! Sino 'yan?!"

"Buksan mo muna 'to! Isa ka ring lintik ka!"

Narinig ko ang pag-click ng isang lock at pagbukas ng pinto. I felt Mang Senggo move forward, followed by the sound of the door closing, and another clicking sound.

"Thea?!"

Unti-unti akong dumilat. Kulay pula man ang paligid dahil sa emergency lights na nasa kisame, siguradong-sigurado ako kung sino ang nasa harapan ko.

Si Kuya Fash, karga-karga ang isang sanggol. Nasa gilid niya naman ang isang batang babae na mahigpit na nakakapit sa kanya.

"S-Siya ang Thea na sinasabi mo?" nautal bigla si Senggo at dahan-dahan niya akong binaba sa sahig. 

Nag-angat ako ng tingin kay Kuya Fash at napansin kong kumurap-kurap siya kay Mang Senggo bago inabot dito ang sanggol. Ingat na ingat namang tinanggap at kinarga ni Mang Senggo ang sanggol. Inabot pa ni Mang Senggo ang kamay ng batang babae at sabay silang umakyat sa hagdan.

"Wait, since when has he been gentle with little kids?" Hindi ko napigilang magkomento lalo pa't parang todo alalay si Mang Senggo sa bata. It was weird because from what I know, Mang Senggo is known for terrorizing people of all ages. Especially little kids.

Nag-angat ako ulit ng tingin kay Kuya Fash at nagulat ako nang lumuhod siya sa harapan ko at bigla akong niyakap nang mahigpit.

Naguguluhan man, yumakap na lamang ako pabalik kay Kuya Fash. Doon ko lang din napagtanto kung nasaan kami.

"Wait, what are you doing in this police station? Why aren't you with my brother?"

Narinig kong suminghap si Kuya Fash. Tinulak ko agad siya palayo at gulat na gulat ako nang makitang umiiyak na siya.

My heart suddenly dropped.

It was the first time I saw Kuya Fash cry and I was scared to find out why.

//