JOON POV:

"Hyung do I have to be the one to go?" I ask incredulously, looking at him with wide eyes as he moves around, plucking our jackets off the hook and picking up the car keys.

"I'll be bored baking on my own Joon-ah, and you're the only one available in front of my eyes." He huffs, lips twitching when I give him an affronted look, betrayed that I'm chosen simply because I'm the only one he can grab.

"But baking? You said I wasn't allowed in kitchens! And I'm not even signed up to the lessons!" I protest, trying to find the logic behind his reasoning.

"I put you down as a prospective student for today, I've cleared it already with the teacher." He says, already nudging me forward, hand against my back and the other one busily putting the jacket into my hands.

"And Joon-ah, you don't want hyung to be bored do you? And you just need to stand there looking pretty for me baby." He says, voice warm as he speaks from behind me, leaning forward to press a kiss to my cheek.

I sigh, already putty in his hands.

"Fine hyung, but I'm not responsible for any damage."  I huff, leading the way out of the house, smiling when he blows a kiss to me before getting into the car.

As we drive I'm struck by a sudden thought.

"But you bake with (Y/N), is she not going to come today?" I ask, turning just in time to see Jin hyung's jaw tighten, the tick visible in his cheek, eyes fixed on the road.

"She wasn't feeling her best when me and Hobi came back. She wasn't in a good state." He confesses, voice tinged with worry and concern.

I think back to when the two had returned home, how silent they'd been, lost in thought and almost moving automatically as they greeted all of us, each sporting distant, faraway looks.

It had been Yoongi hyung who had to remind Hobi that they had a dance lesson that evening, and he'd rounded Kookie and Jiminie up for him, sending them off with a contemplative look.

But neither Hobi nor Jin hyung divulged exactly what had happened, though they'd mentioned that Habaek had been drugged, his drink had been spiked. It had made me feel angry, made me feel a sudden spike of protectiveness and worry for (Y/N), worrying over what could've happened if it had been her drink that had been drugged, considering her much smaller frame and just how much harder it could've hit her. But from the sounds of it Habaek had been given a high dosage, he'd been unfocused and unable to be coherent for the majority of it. And that in itself was worrying and despicable for someone to do.

Which was why I didn't press for another meeting with him, I figured I'd give a few days so he could rest and recuperate properly.

But what I didn't know that (Y/N) hadn't seemed well either, it made me feel slightly restless as hyung drove.

"Was it bad?" I ask carefully, hearing the slight panic in my own voice.

Jin hyung hums noncommittally.

"Quite bad." He confesses in a quiet voice.

But then his voice rises in volume.

"Which is why I need a baking partner today Joon-ah, and you are my lucky love!" he chirps, voice sounding as if he was trying to forcefully instil enthusiasm into his words. It also made me realise that Jin hyung, the one who could happily potter around the kitchen for hours on end alone as he experimented, wanted one of us there to distract him from the glaringly obvious absence, of baking without (Y/N).

And I'd do it for him. I'd be the silly, goofy, clumsy lover he needed me to be. Would allow him to distract himself by scolding, chiding and playfully tutting at me as he whisked away my mess and restored order again to the kitchen.

"You're the lucky one hyung!" I tease, glad to hear the huff of laughter from him as we continue to drive, but this time with a more slightly eased atmosphere, the worry slowly lessening from his side.

And as we enter, I begin to eye the highly furnished and sparkling kitchen units, looking apprehensively at hyung. He wants to set me loose in such an expensive, well-maintained environment?

"Hyung I don't think..." I begin, tugging at his sleeve as I trail behind him, fidgeting under the curious and lingering eyes that follow me as I walk behind hyung.

"You'll be fine Joon-ah, here let me grab our aprons." He says, trying to extract himself from the grip I've got on his arm with both of my hands.

"Hyung they'll eat me alive, don't leave me." I say in a hushed frantic whisper, following him to where the aprons are kept.

I notice the frown on Jin hyung's face as he examines the aprons, picking up one and looking confused.

"Where's the second one? Ahh...someone must've taken (Y/N)'s one- here use another one Joonie." He says, gesturing to the mismatched spare aprons on the other end.

But when the two of us walk to what I presume is his usual cooking space, he halts- pausing mid-step and causing me to stumble into his back.

The kitchen is already occupied, there's a young woman standing there with her back to us, fingers deftly tying her hair up in a ponytail.

"Excuse me I usually use this...(Y/N)!" Jin hyung starts to get cut off when the woman turns, revealing that it is none other than her, smiling at him, lips stretched wide as she gives a dazzling pearly smile. The effect of her smile is that it stuns me for a few moments, distracting me from actually taking in her face which I realise with dawning horror is splotched purple with bruising.

I feel my mouth dry, stomach churn at the sight, shocked at how unaffected she seems to my growing horror. Why isn't hyung shocked is what baffles me even more, turning to look at him with a gaping mouth to find his lips are pressed tightly, not reciprocating her smile.

Her smile dims and falls and I find myself mentally berating hyung for coming off as so hard, giving him a nudge with my elbow before stepping around him.

"Hey (Y/N)!" I say, waving at her when she turns to me, her eyes gratefully latching onto my happier countenance.

She returns the wave, cheeks bunching adorably at the end of her lips when they curve up in a smile.

"Hyung wasn't expecting you, but umm....he didn't mention this." I say gesturing carefully to my own face, mirroring where her bruising is.

She gives a small shrug, eyes not revealing anything.

"Are you okay? Do they still hurt? Any throbbing pain, feeling of heat from the areas?" I ask, peering worriedly at her face, not realising I've shuffled closer to carefully inspect her face and noting the scratches on one cheek.

She shakes her head, waving off my concerns good-naturedly, but my fingers reach out of their own accord to gently touch the bruising on her cheek, wincing myself when I see the purple under my touch.

She's looking slightly bemused at me, eyes crinkled with soft amusement when I freeze, realising I've touched her face but more so at the way it snaps Jin hyung out of his silence.

"Yah Namjoon-ah, don't go prodding her face!" he scolds.

He sighs when his eyes fall onto her.

"You should've rested more (Y/N)." he says.

She makes an okay gesture with her hand.

He shakes his head at her.

"What I remember was that you were very much not okay. And it's fine to take a few days off away from everything." He says softly.

But he gives a resigned look at her all the same, as if he already knows there's no budging her, there's no convincing her otherwise.

It's the same look he gives to the maknaes or any of us when we're particularly stubborn and he knows he's in a losing fight.

And I know from the fire I've seen in her eyes, that the passion I've seen in them aren't anything to be taken lightly, that she's a fighter for whatever she believes in.

It's just another instance I'm seeing it in and it's a mixture of endearing and fondness that I feel burst in my heart, that she knows somehow exactly what buttons to push without trying and hyung is susceptible to her silent sweet charm. Especially when she gives him a doleful look. As if his response is disheartening.

And then he gives a small smile, admitting defeat.

"That's where the second apron went then." He says, eyes dropping to the matching coloured apron.

She nods happily and then peers curiously at me, lips twitching at whatever thought was running through her head.

And then she gives me a double thumbs up before her hands curl into fists that she shakes enthusiastically, a silent rooting for me, bolstering me and giving me encouragement.

You can do this, her gestures speak.

I smile wryly.

"If I come out without breaking or burning anything, that's the biggest success." I say, my smile widening when it makes her face crinkle into one of silent laughter.

----

(Y/N) it seems might even be more particular than Jin hyung when it comes to being extremely precise and careful as she bakes.

And it's such a new enlightening experience for me. There's something so assured about her, so confident in every move she makes that has me gaping in awe. She doesn't second-guess her actions and even Jin hyung seems to turn to her for help or advice or just to chatter, baking forgotten as he talks to her. I've never seen Jin hyung find someone a worthy distraction that he forgets the task at hand, but I guess there's a first time for everything. There's also something so inherently soothing about watching her be so focused and in her zone that it makes me unconsciously smile and gravitate closer and closer to her, situating myself between her and Jin hyung.

"Joon-ah stop gawking at my pretty face and help hyung choose the order of layering for today's desserts." Jin hyung says calling me over to his end, I shoot a glance at (Y/N) to witness one of the most adorable, frowny pouts as she contemplates seriously over the prepared layers in front of her, fingers dithering and flitting from one to the other as she tries to make her mind up.

"Go for the biscuit base first, it seems the most solid." I remark, pointing to the tray before darting off to hyung, almost missing the thankful smile she shoots me.

Hyung however has me just standing there looking pretty as he says so I don't end up having a clumsy moment near (Y/N), shooting me a stifled look of laughter when my face clears in understanding, eyes going wide with mortification as I envision a scenario in my head.

Yup, definitely safer I think as I stay carefully to one side. But I don't realise that in my sprawled-out state against the counter my foot becomes a hazard. Which I learn moments later when Jin hyung turns and strides towards (Y/N) with the dry ingredients to make their sponge batter together.

And his mouth widens with alarm, eyes popping out and the dry ingredients go flying, freeing themselves of his grip and soaring into the air. My arms desperately reach out to catch him, hands managing to fist onto his sweater and tugging him safely into me.

And just at that moment (Y/N) turns, eyes widening and hands scrabbling- managing to catch onto the sugar, she's barely set it aside quickly and turns just in time to see the eggs smash onto the ground and the flour to go tumbling across her tied apron, covering her chest in it. The flour forms a cloud of white haze around her and I freeze in shock, the air clearing to reveal her startled expression, face smattered with the flour too, some of it catching onto her hair and neck.

I feel heat crawl up my neck to my cheeks, embarrassed at how inadvertently I've caused a clumsy moment and the proof of it lies in front of me, both on the floor and (Y/N). 

Jin hyung sucks in a breath, straightening up properly up against me.

"Joon-ah, get something to clean the floor with. And a clean cloth as well. Aigoo baby..." he sighs fondly and slightly exasperated as he straightens up.

He sends me off with a squeeze to my arm and I rush away, cheeks aflame and flustered- hurrying away from the disastrous scene I've created.

What great impressions you keep having I mentally comment to myself.

Just fantastic. What a way to impress the girl who matches your tastes and passions! Just great. I think as I hurry away.

Just how do I look her in the eyes now?

(Y/N) POV:

It's only quick reflexes that allow me to catch the bag of sugar and set it aside when I see it soaring through the air, barely turning again in time. Just quick enough to witness the carton of eggs to go shattering to the ground, eggshells flying out, and for the flour bag to hit me in the chest- clearly having been used at some point because the impact creates a cloud of white powder around me, leaving it's floury imprint on me as it knocks into my chest. I manage to grab it before it goes tumbling to the ground and when the white cloud dissipates it reveals two shocked figures.

Jin leaning against Namjoon, clearly having been caught from taking a nasty tumble to the ground and Namjoon wide-eyed and frozen as he peers at me, an aghast horrified look on his face.

Do I look that bad I wonder, or is it just his response to having seen such a rush of actions in a small-time span?

"Joon-ah, get something to clean the floor with. And a clean cloth as well. Aigoo baby..." he sighs, looking both accustomed to it as well as fond as he sends Namjoon off, allowing me to draw the conclusion that he's had one of those infamous clumsy moments.

He hurries past, colour high on his cheeks as he bustles past, almost slipping on some of the eggs in his haste, and then Jin is approaching me, looking apologetic and tentative.

"I'm sorry (Y/N), I really am. Joonie is my clumsy big baby." He explains wryly.

It makes my lips twitch when I think of Namjoon's impassioned speech about entering the kitchen, remember how shocked Jin had seemed at the idea when I'd cheered him on. Maybe this was why. Maybe this was exactly it. Not because he didn't seem to have an affinity for cooking, because I was so sure if he guided himself according to instructions he could produce something amazing, but more so because of his clumsy streak putting him at a disadvantage and a potential hazard to himself.

It was warming to imagine Namjoon being trailed behind by six anxious others, hovering over his shoulders, trying to remove sharp items out of his reach or trying to be as helpful as possible. Now it slightly made sense why he'd been at the book café that day, but I still believed he deserved a chance. Some guidance and he could flourish.

"(Y/N)...oh no don't cry!" Jin says suddenly, taking the twitch of my lips as a wobble, a sign that I was going to tear up.

"Maybe it's a bad time but you're my pretty flower and look you're also covered in it too!" he says, voice desperately trying to distract me, the comment so absurd and sudden and slightly ridiculous that it makes the laughter bubble up my throat and even as my hand habitually goes to cover my mouth, can't manage to stifle the small giggle that escapes, a small sound that escapes into the silence.

And I watch as Jin seems to freeze, hands frozen mid-air where they'd been waving frantically as he tried to distract me, plump lips falling open and soft brown eyes widening.

I know I can't hide the fact that I've giggled, audibly too, when I'd been maintaining eye contact with him when it had happened, captured by the softness of his brown eyes as they shone with earnest concern and worry as he tried to reassure me, there's no ducking down and hiding at the moment. And for some reason, I don't feel scared...I feel safe knowing that he's heard. There's an inexplicable sense of comfort I get from Jin and maybe especially after how he helped a few nights back that just makes me feel comforted and reassured by his presence. Because he'd helped me at an extremely unstable moment, he'd offered help not for me at first but for Habaek oppa- he'd helped one of the people I loved and cherished most in this world. And because of that some part of me had easily accepted him as someone who represented safety. I felt as if he wouldn't mind, that he wouldn't be horrified.

But what I don't expect is for his lips to stretch wide into a beaming, dazzling smile or for his eyes to sparkle sweetly, face transformed into a look of elation and giddiness and surprise.

"Did you just...did you...did I hear...oh my gosh (Y/N)!" he exclaims, seeming to be lost for words, sounding dazed. 

I give a small smile, hand falling to my side, eyes busily falling to brush the flour off my apron, trying to clear it off my neck carefully so it doesn't fall to the inside of my top, hands fluttering to move it off.

But then he catches my wrist.

"None of that (Y/N), no hiding, you sweet adorable baby!" he coos, not trying to urge my head up at all but instead bending down, legs bending so he can peer up at me, eyes soft and tender, lips parted in awe.

He rises, drawing my gaze up with him.

"You're just....ahhhh I just want to....oh gods (Y/N) my darling...." He rambles, words cutting off by his other thoughts, failing to express himself.

Instead his hands just flutter in the air, wandering distractedly as if uncertain where to land.

But then he busies himself by getting a paper towel to hand to me to brush the flour off my chest, cheeks warm as he gazes at me, and when I turn after discarding the paper towel, his hands brush the flour clean off the tips of my hair, hands even going to brush and dust the flour off my cheeks.

His hands are busily removing the flour, eyes focused, but when he catches my gaze he gives me a soft sparkling smile.

He leans back.

"You're just a cutie!" he settles on, before his eyes catch onto my cheek, thumb rubbing at the flour there.

And it's almost an instinctual, impulsive action that has him leaning forward to kiss the cheek he's just wiped clean with gentle strokes of his thumb, the pressure of his plush lips soft and velvety against my skin, the warmth of them fanning out across my cheek. It's a brief instance of pressure and he's leaning back, looking fondly at me.

And yet he doesn't seem to regret the action, he silently awaits my verdict, looking a mixture of worried that he's crossed a barrier and wishing silently that he hasn't.

My answer comes to him when I smile, feeling my cheeks warm. That it's the first instance I've accepted such an easily given act of affection from someone beyond Habaek oppa and Mi-sun unnie, the touch almost foreign and alien and yet craved and welcomed.

I didn't realise how much I loved tactile affection until I'd begun retreating into myself. Didn't realise that the casual touches and pecks were something I'd adored until I'd began flinching when someone would do them. And now...when Jin does it- it feels natural, it feels accepted and welcomed.

And for some reason, a guilty part of me wishes to reciprocate the peck, a brush against his cheek. And shamefully my eyes catch to the plushness of his lips, rosy and full as they spread into a relieved elated smile.

And when Namjoon returns, the feeling is almost as if I've been drenched in cold water, startlingly icy and shocking- as if I've been caught doing something wrong, as if my thoughts are being broadcasted.

And when he comes, wringing his hands as he sweetly stutters over his words as he apologises, holding a clean towel towards me as a peace offering, I find my heart, already soft, melt.

And the dimpled sweet smile I get is so rewarding that I get confused momentarily.

Feeling the phantom pressure of Jin's lips against my cheek and Namjoon's sweet smile that makes my heart skip a beat.

And clutch onto my torn shattered restraints, mentally trying to enforce barriers.

Because if I continued allowing these feelings to build, I would be the only one hurt.

(THERE YOU GO!! I SWEAR I PLANNED TWO UPDATES TODAY AND WAS SO ON TRACK WITH THIS BUT THEN I GOT DRAGGED OUT SHOPPING SO ONLY ONE TODAY I'M AFRAID MY LOVES!! BUT THERE WILL BE A PART 2 TO THIS AND I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER SO, SO MUCH! THAT YOU ADORED NAMJIN IN THE KITCHEN AND THAT CLUMSY MOMENT!! AND SHE GIGGLED! AND JINNIE HEARD!! AND HE COULDN'T HELP GUSHING!! AND A KISS! THE FIRST KISS! THIS CHAPTER IS FOR YOU MY DARLING MIDDIP! TO SATISFY THE BURN YOUR HEART IS SUFFERING AND FOR EVERYONE TOO! BECAUSE SLOWBURN...FLAMES ARE BEGINNING TO CATCH STRENGTH AND GROW!! STAY SAFE AND LET ME KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS! AHHH! I'M SO GIDDY!! TAKE CARE LOVES!!)

QUESTION...SOMETHING THAT ONE OF THE BTS MEMBERS HAVE SAID THAT MADE YOU JUST CLUTCH AT YOUR WOUNDED HEART?

Mine is...if I list them all then we've got to have a nice chat and sit down for god knows how long? But one of them is most definitely when in their early years Kookie was asked which member he needs, can't be without and he said Jin! Because he said Jin makes his lunch and takes him to school and my heart just KAPOOT! EXPOLDED! And there's also this image from around the time of Yoongi picking Kookie up from school that makes me soft!! Cos he's carrying his schoolbag for him too!! Ack!! But there's so many more!!

Borahae! 💜💜💜

PurpleQueenie <3