Chapter 29- but there's someone to catch me when I fall
JIMIN POV:
Who knew rushing after Tannie's boisterous, energetic self would bring me here to this moment? Initially it had started off as a chase after the fluffy sweet menace, then it had been concern for the still statue the girl had been, broken only by the small tremors wracking her body and then that concern had only grown when she'd never raised her head or told me she was fine for all the okay gestures she made. I don't know what made me stop, but something tugged me to sit down next to her- felt as if she wasn't actually fine and made me want to keep an eye out for her.
I thought she'd rise and head off when the rain began but her clear refusal to move showed me that she was willing to get drenched. So I had to resort to feigning ignorance and repeating my questions for her to raise her head and yell at me, glare at me, any reaction that would ease the worry and let me go home without it hovering over me.
But I didn't expect the head to rise to reveal a familiar face. (Y/N). A very tear-stained, wobbling lips, flushed cheeks and hurting eyes (Y/N). My heart ached at the pained sight in front of me, feel my heart crumble where finally up close to her I can see the weariness coating her features, see the harsher angle to her jaw- losing some of that soft full roundness to give way to a weary face; hyung was right, I didn't think she was eating well, it looked like whatever she was going through was pushing her need and concern for her personal health to the side. It hurt seeing the raw gaping vulnerability in her eyes, the pain and grief in them as she looked up at me- surprise barely filtering through the emotion laden orbs.
"(Y/N)?" her name slips out of my mouth, surprise and worry in that one word.
I sink down in front of her, watching as Tannie scrambles out from under her legs and paws at her side, trying to clamber onto her lap. Her legs shift automatically, lowering to give him that space and even as he looks happily at her, tail quickly wagging behind him and a bark of greeting, she just looks down at him vacantly, eyes still trickling down tears silently. He clambers up, supporting his weight on his back legs as he paws gently at her, head rising as he tries to get closer to her, whining low in his throat when she doesn't reciprocate his eagerness, tail slowing down.
He nudges at her, peering up at her.
"What's wrong (Y/N)?" I ask gently, heart twisting with panic.
The rain begins to get heavier and it's then I note the laptop discarded to the side, shutting it and putting it into the discarded bag on the side, protecting it from damage.
"(Y/N)...give me a sign. You're worrying me here." I say, hand hovering hesitantly over her leg before coming to rest on her slightly damp denim-clad knee- mentally bracing for the visceral flinch, for her to shudder at my touch- expecting her to stiffen, the sight of her jerking back from hyung's touch is still fresh in my mind.
But rather than stiffen, she imperceptibly sags- as if the touch comforts her. And I realise that sometimes physical touch is the reassurance that some need, that it brings them comfort in a way that words can't.
Maybe that's what (Y/N) needs.
Every part of me is screaming to just hug her, the vulnerable outline of her, the shattered expression on her face and the way she continues to silently cry and shake is tearing at my insides, ripping apart ideas of control. Just like I would for the others, just like I would for Tae and Kookie when they come to me upset I want to hold her close and rock her gently, shelter her from the world and keep her safe between my arms.
Maybe sometimes it's best to follow instinct and throw caution to the wind.
"Come here sweetie." The term of endearment slips off my tongue but I barely note it, barely fret over it mentally, that it'll scare her away but when my arms go around her, holding her close she seems to break, melting and folding into the embrace. There's a suppressed sound of a gasp- inaudible but I feel the shudder against my shoulder where her head leans against and I can feel the trembling of her in my arms, shaking.
"Let it all out." I murmur.
And when her fingers hesitant and wary come to grip at the open sides of my jacket, I tell her it's fine and the grip becomes tight, clutching with a frantic need at them as she curves in.
I can feel the two of us becoming drenched in the rain, Tannie having darted under again to yip at her but I let her take the time she needs, let her feel safe and protected and to allow her to let her tears out, from the hidden safety of a hug.
I just hold her as she cries, rocking her gently and just trying to be there for her- words fall short because I don't know what's wrong, don't know anything about the reasons behind her distress and only knowing that I need to comfort her.
And when the shaking stops and her head rises to reveal watery eyes and a red-tipped nose, flushed wet cheeks- I fight the urge to burrow her back in, feeling this deep driven need to hide her away.
She retreats back a bit, and I find myself missing the warmth as she moves back, arms empty. She shakes her head at herself before she dips her head at me, mouthing sorry over and over.
My heart lurches at that, sinks.
"Don't apologise. Don't be sorry at all." I say, watching that as Tannie now scampers to her, her hands immediately go about petting him, scratching gently behind his ears, and running her fingers through his fur. But then she balks- seeming to realise that the two of us are drenched because she hurries to rise, shifting Tannie so he's angled within the fold of her jacket, fussing over him silently.
I pick up her bag, slinging the backpack strap over one shoulder.
"Well we're both soaked through now. I should call hyung." I say aloud, fingers fumbling to get my phone out.
Yoongi hyung responds almost immediately, saying he's on the way from buying groceries so he'll be here in a few but when I raise my head to tell her the news she's frowning at herself.
"It's no problem (Y/N). I'm not letting you go anywhere when you're this soaked. You'll get ill." I fret, noting that the rain is steadily becoming heavier.
I worry my lip between my teeth, mentally calculating how far it is to the exit. It's a few minutes later and as I'm watching the exit, I note a familiar car pull up and just then my phone chimes with a message- hyung is here.
"Let's go (Y/N)." I say.
And without thinking, simply an action that is instinctual and more than second nature to me, I grasp her hand between mine and tug her alongside me as the two of us rush towards the exit in a sprint, rain pelting down on us. And as we reach the car, I tug the car door open sliding in and pulling her alongside me. It's then that I note the warmth from her hands, note the fact that her hands indeed are small and yet perfectly fit in mine. And as the door shuts, I note that all this time, she'd been running with Tannie still tucked away inside her jacket- protecting him from getting wet.
And there's a moment silence before Tannie barks loud and excited as he emerges from the inside of her jacket- staring at me with his tongue out.
"Oh sorry! I never asked...force of habit." I mumble as I go to slide my hand out of hers, missing the warmth and feel of it as I suddenly empty it.
And when I look up I see Yoongi hyung is staring right at (Y/N), eyes soft and gentle and proffered from his hand is a soft pale pink towel held out towards her.
(Y/N) POV:
It's the pet name and the hug that does it. Makes me lean into him, starved for touch and affection- his words and voice and tone so soothing and comforting- just like how Habaek oppa would hold me towards him. There's this overwhelming feeling of comfort and safety when he holds me, makes me feel protected as he rocks me gently and tells me to let it all out.
And it's because of Jimin that I find myself pulled back from the brink where I teeter unstably. It's something that is just intrinsically him, something that spells comfort and help and soft assurance that I let myself clutch at him, let myself those moments of weakness, I'll berate myself later for it.
And when he tugs me along with him, his hand in mine the shock quickly wears off to give way to a seed of warmth that sprouts and blooms across my heart, fanning out with the pleasant tingles of having a friend be there for me. it's a mad dash for the car and I try desperately to keep my other hand protectively cradling Tannie towards me, hand holding him under my jacket- unable to bear the thought of a wet, disgruntled puppy.
Jimin pulls me into the car behind him and I slide across the seat, clothes wet and drenched and no doubt dripping onto the interior, the very smart and luxurious leather.
I barely realise that Jimin's hand is still holding mine as I raise my head to meet the eyes of whoever's driving, startled when I find Yoongi staring at me, hand holding the steering wheel but attention on me.
There's nothing but soft tender concern in his eyes and understanding and he breaks eye contact with me to retrieve something from the passenger chair, holding out a folded soft pink towel towards me.
The moment of connection is shattered by Tannie's bright bark as he pops out from my jacket and Jimin's adorable fumbling of words as he apologises.
"Here take it, you'll get a cold." He insists, nudging it towards me.
My hands reach out to accept the folded towel, smiling gratefully at him- though I have an idea of what mess greets him as I do so.
His hand dips down to get a second towel that he lobs at Jimin, smiling fondly when he protests.
And I see his fingers fiddle to turn up the heating, a rush of warmth that comes out the vents and brushes gently against my damp skin, skin I scrub at to get rid of the rain, drying my hands too. I shiver when some of the cold water from my hair trickles down the back of my shirt, causing Jimin and Yoongi to turn towards me.
"Dry your hair too." Jimin insists- stopping mid-scrub to stare at me from under a towel.
I return my attention to drying my hair, letting the towel rest around my shoulders.
When Yoongi deems us dry enough he turns around.
"You should try and always avoid the rain. Looks like Tannie was the only one smart enough to remain dry." He says lightly, eyes expressing that he's slightly teasing.
Tannie lets out a bark when he hears his name, happily wriggling before clambering back onto my lap and peering up at me.
He begins to drive, Yoongi and Jimin in a discussion and I focus on petting the fluffy dog in my lap, making up for the time I'd neglected giving him all that affection.
And then Yoongi calls my name, drawing my attention to him.
"What's your address?" he asks when we approach a traffic light and he stops, making me realise that he doesn't even know where they're meant to be taking me. I flush slightly. Before leaning forward, unbuckling my belt to tap in my address onto the navigation system on the screen.
He nods.
And continues to drive. Jimin leans in a few times to quietly ask if I'm feeling better, to make some not so whispered comments about his hyung's driving or to just to pet Tannie who seems to happily made his perched position on my lap.
"You're a traitor Tannie, now I knew what Tae meant." He says, leaning to press a kiss to Tannie's face before leaning back.
And when Yoongi pulls up outside my house, I slide out, nodding and dipping my head in thanks at both of them and pressing a final kiss to Tannie's head before stepping away. But what surprises me is when Yoongi steps out too, with a warning directed to Jimin to stay in the heated car as he walks me to my door, I fidget- slightly unsure whether this is his way of making sure I'm entrusted into safe hands or whether he simply wants to.
And when the door opens to reveal Habaek oppa- his face which had been creased with worry shifts as his eyes widen and with an alarmed cry, arms wounding around me.
He holds me close as he turns to face Yoongi who's expression is soft and relieved as he takes in the sight.
"Thank you for bringing her back, you have no idea how worried I've been." Habaek oppa rambles, arms tightening around my arms.
"It's no problem. (Y/N) make sure to take a nice soak and dress warm too. You still might get a cold." He frets, brows furrowing as he looks at me.
I nod.
"Of course, I'll make sure of it. Thank you so, so much..." Habaek oppa pauses, realising he has no idea what my saviour is called.
"Yoongi. And no problem, I always keep an eye out for friends." He says grinning at me. I feel my cheeks warm at the genuine sincerity in his voice and the way his dark eyes are soft and caring as they look at me.
"Do you want to come in? The least I can do is offer you a hot drink for your concern for our cherub." He insists.
But Yoongi shakes his head.
"I have a soggy dongsaeng to get home, I hope to see you around (Y/N)- take care of yourself." He says before stepping away, giving me a small wave as he leaves.
And when the door shuts behind him, Habaek oppa turns his attention to me.
"You need to take better care of yourself. What would you have done if one of them hadn't found you?" he asks, voice slightly raised in his panic.
My shoulders curve in with shame, taking the light scolding he's giving.
But he just sighs, hurrying me up the stairs and grabbing the towel to thoroughly dry my hair, muttering about how I'll give him a heart attack one of these days.
----
And though I wake the next day with a pounding head and a sore throat, nose blocked and feeling achy all over, I can't help feel warmth remembering how kind Jimin had been and how Yoongi had offered comfort in his silent ways.
So it doesn't matter that my throat feels raw with how much coughing I've done, I look at the confirmation on my phone and hope he likes what I've done.
YOONGI POV:
Coming home yesterday with a wet dongsaeng hadn't gone down well for Jimin. Jin hyung had been nothing short of aghast as he'd taken in the sight of Jiminie grinning from under the towel- had shot him a stern look as he'd hurried him away to soak in a hot bath, fretting and keeping an eye out on him through the night.
Kookie and Tae had been all too willing to curl onto either side and smother him with their body warmth, pressing kisses to his skin as he shivered and clutched at the blankets. And Joon and Hobi had been flitting in and out with blankets, thermometers and hot water bottles and trays of soup and broth to feed Jimin who looked like he was well and truly coming down with a cold.
And the next morning I had risen early with the intention of getting some hot food ready for him- already mentally cataloguing how I could make the sofa more comfortable, what throws and cushions and blankets would make it as comfortable as it could be for him.
Jiminie is ushered straight away to the corner I've set up for him as the soup simmers away on the stove and Tae declares his loyalty by plastering himself to his side, cuddling Tannie as he chatters softly to him.
The sight of the fluffy Pomeranian makes me wonder how he'd been perfectly dry when he'd been in the car when the other two were so visibly drenched and I decide to voice my confusion, Jiminie facing me on the opposite end.
"Ahh...(Y/N) had him under her jacket the entire time so he wouldn't get wet." Jiminie explains through a slightly hoarse voice.
Jin hyung who's entering at that moment, turns in confusion- setting the tray down carefully onto Jimin's lap, the legs of it on either side of his thighs.
And as he feeds spoonfuls of soup and rice to Jiminie, the others tune into the way Jiminie slowly recounts yesterday.
Whilst he doesn't elaborate much on her further than the fact that she'd been upset, I can't help but wonder that he's omitting large chunks of detail; trying to protect her privacy I realise with a fond smile. I had seen her when she'd been tugged into the car, and for all the ways her hair had been plastered to her- hanging in wet heavy waves around her face that indicated clearly she'd been crying, the way she was shivering slightly- she had still been hauntingly captivating. Even as it looked like she'd been drained physically, face slightly more angular- making me miss her round full cheeks.
And looking at her stirred up an instinctual need to protect.
And as Tae fusses over Tannie, loudly talking about how Tannie seems to be getting the best of (Y/N) with all her cuddles and petting, the others shoot fond grins- though none refute it either.
But then the doorbell rings and Kookie slides off Hobi's lap to go to answer it, the sound of his voice filtering through slightly- confused. But then he returns in the doorway, holding a large weaved box in his hands.
Jin hyung moves the empty tray to the side, Jiminie's lap vacated only for it to be filled with what Kookie's bearing.
"It's for you hyung." He states, looking down in curiosity as Jiminie opens the buckles on the weaved box to reveal what looks like a comfort care package when I rise and cross the distance in intrigue. A soft plush blanket on which rests an assortment of medicines on one end and comfort food on the other- a hot chocolate kit and a box of cupcakes. There's even a bubble bath set tucked to one side and fuzzy thick socks.
And perched neatly on the top is a message written in a beautiful font.
Take care of your health Jimin. Thank you for being there for me- the hug really helped. Give Tannie some kisses- his snacks are underneath everything else. (Y/N).
And I look at the package with fresher eyes, see the way Jimin's lips curve into a bright smile and when he produces the mentioned snacks for Tannie, Tannie barks.
And Jiminie lets out a cough, smiling even as he lowers his arm.
"Getting ill was so worth it. She liked my hug!" he says, sitting up straighter to run his fingers reverently over the things inside.
His face is lit up, shining with joy for having been able to help her.
And then Tae breaks the silence by speaking up.
"I swear I'll be the only one to walk Tannie from now on." He states firmly.
(TA DA! THERE YOU GO! LET ME KNOW HOW YOU FELT READING THE CHAPTER, THE REACTIONS, THE GOOD, THE BAD, EVERYTHING!! THIS CHAPTER WAS REALLY FUN FOR ME TO WRITE AND I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO WRITING TODAY- COS I WANTED TO KNOW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN! AND JIMINIE CAME TO GIVE OUR BABY SIREN (Y/N) THE CUDDLES SHE NEEDED AND I JUST FELT SUPER SOFT WRITING THIS! ACK! I HOPE YOU ENJOYED READING IT AS MUCH AS I DID WRITING! STAY SAFE AND ENJOY! AND I WONDER WHO'LL BE THE NEXT ONE TO MEET HER! I HAVE A FEW PLANS- BUT IT COULD GO ANYWHERE! TAKE CARE!)
QUESTION...ONE OF THE MOST ENLIGHTENING ADVICES YOUR TEACHER GAVE YOU?
Mine is...my psychology teacher during teaching us the attachment and relationships module was talking about Prison Bae- which is a whole another thing but! She told us that attraction doesn't pay the bills! And that to be careful as we enter and form relationships. She was such a sweet teacher- I miss her!
Borahae! 💜💜💜
PurpleQueenie <3
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