WARNING: This chapter contains sensitive topics such as violence, death, and brief mentions/allusions of rape and suicide. Please read at your own discretion. None of these themes are intended to be glorified.

⊰ T H I R T Y  F I V E ⊱

ONE TERRIBLE ACCIDENT

I glanced over at Yoongi, wondering what his greatest desire must be. For some reason, I felt nervous to find out, especially since things had become so tense between us. So much of his past had remained hidden and unspoken, maybe even more so than the rest of the crew.

He wasn't simple enough to seek treasure alone, unless it was something valuable beyond words. Perhaps he wanted revenge on the pirates that killed Dawon. Or maybe he had to pay a visit to an old friend.

All I knew about Yoongi's history was that he'd joined a pirate crew as a young boy, around the age of thirteen. He told me how he'd fallen in love with the sea and learned all he could from the captain, becoming a young protégé of his. When he was eighteen, their crew defeated an entire ship of pirates and the captain allowed Yoongi to take the ship for his own, along with the help of Jin and Namjoon, whom he met soon after. They went out to recruit the others along the way, building up their family and forming unbreakable bonds through their explorations and missions over the next five years. Yoongi was twenty-three when he saved me and took me in, which made him twenty-seven at present.

Nine years as a captain of his own ship and crew. Nine years to make friends and form enemies, to go on adventures and get in trouble and narrowly escape each time. The map of Yoongi's travels stretched out in every direction, giving way for too many possibilities of what he could want most.

"Jimin, can you sense where we're headed?" Namjoon asked.

Jimin shook his head, then eyed the captain as he spoke. "I can barely get a hold on the direction. I'll take a look at the map you made me keep."

Jimin seemed cautious. Was he really worried that one of us would steal the map and throw him overboard because we didn't need him anymore? I couldn't see anyone doing that. Not even Yoongi, who wasn't fond of Jimin in the first place.

"Alright. Let Taehyung know our heading as soon as you figure it out," Yoongi ordered, "Let's get ready to sail, boys."

And then the men were dispersing, going to their different stations and preparing to lift the anchor.

I'd come to find out that we had never left after our battle with the other pirates. We were still sat beside the black monster of a ship that had once belonged to Namjoon's father and Booth. It was a shame to leave such a beautiful vessel behind, but we didn't have the time it would take to learn to sail it alongside Yoongi's.

"Katherine, can you come with me?" Jimin's satin voice chimed.

I faced him, noticing once again his tired appearance. It was unsettling seeing him that way, and I worried for him.

"Sure." I nodded before following him to the upper deck where his hammock was. I didn't know why he brought me with him so I stayed quiet and waited for him to speak first.

Instead of saying anything, he moved past his hammock over to the wooden mast it was tied to. He glanced at me before he brought his hand up to pull something out of a small, carved out hole in the wood. His fingers were wrapped around a thin, rolled up paper. The map.

"Why are you showing me where you hid it? I thought you wanted to use it to feel more secure about us keeping our end of the deal?"

He shrugged, beginning to unfold it. "I trust you," he said as he spread the map out against the mast for us to view it.

There were two different pencil marks. One, which circled a spot on some tiny island, was labeled 'dirty pirate'. The other, circling an unfamiliar beach on a large, main body of land, was labeled 'kitten'.

The corner of my lips tilted up in a half-smile. "You really love calling me that, don't you?"

"No, of course not," he responded sarcastically, still holding the map up. "I just call you that all the time while secretly hating it."

"Sassy."

"It's my specialty."

"So we head northwest then, right? Last we checked the map, we were around here," I stepped closer, pointing to the general area we were currently in. My shoulder brushed his and I felt his gaze scanning my profile.

"Yeah, northwest," he mumbled.

"Okay, let's go tell Taehyung then," I said while turning to head back down.

"Wait," he caught my wrist and I stopped short, heart skipping for a second. "Aren't you curious about yours?"

I swallowed, gently removing my arm from his grasp. "I'm dreading it."

"Why?" he inquired, tilting his head to the side.

Biting my lip, I debated whether it was a good time to tell him or not. "Because I know exactly what it is. Or rather who it is, and I don't know if I'm ready to face them yet." I owed him my story. I'd been putting it off long enough. "I want to resolve things between my mother and sister. I want their forgiveness."

"Forgiveness for what?"

"For killing my stepfather," I answered quietly.

Jimin was silent for a while.

"He's who you killed before you jumped?"

"Yes... I still need to tell you what happened," I said, meeting his wary gaze.

"Only when you're ready," he replied softly.

"I'll tell you tonight then. I've been putting it off long enough."

After we'd agreed to meet up later that night, Jimin left to inform Taehyung where we were headed. I did my part in handling the ship, and as soon as we were steady, I was directed by Hoseok and Jin to go back to bed and get some rest.

I dozed for most of the day, occasionally tossing and turning when I wondered about both Yoongi's destination and my own. But there was one thought that continued to plague me more than any other, and that was the question of what would happen when Jimin finished his end of the deal.

When he had offered to bring us to our greatest desires, Jimin asked in return that I let him use my blood to become human. He said that as soon as he finished taking us to all our locations, he would go off on his own and live his life as a human.

Was that still his plan? Would he still want to leave after he fulfilled our agreement? Or did he care enough that he would want to stay?

What if he's been pushing you away and hiding his feelings because he knows he's going to leave? The thought scratched at my chest. Then I remembered his words that night at the tavern when I'd asked him why he refused to kiss me.

"I won't start something I can't finish."

It made sense, but what if there was more to it?

Groaning, I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow. If I kept torturing myself with questions I didn't know the answers to, I was going to lose what little sanity I had left. I would just have to ask Jimin myself and hope he'd give me an answer.

Eventually, the sun set and I made my way to the bow of the ship. Jimin was already there, leaning his back against the edge as he silently watched me approach. His normally heated gaze was gentle, like he wanted to make sure I felt comfortable with him.

"Hi," I said a little awkwardly, joining him in resting against the rail.

"Hi," he returned my greeting. "We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"I want to. I want you to know more about me. It's only fair after what you shared with me."

He looked at me without saying anything, then finally, he nodded, "Okay then."

I took a deep breath, preparing to live that night all over again.

It was long past midnight when I awoke to the sound of him leaving Anna's room. He stumbled down the hall, boots scuffling across the floor in what I assumed to be another drunken haze of his. Fear spiked through every inch of my body, chills raking down my spine at the thought of him visiting my sister in the dark hours of the night.

I'd caught his secretive glances in her direction during the day, and I had heard him leave her room a couple other nights before, but I was too afraid to accept the implications. I'd ignored it, written it off as him just going into her room to tell her something important that he had forgotten to say before she went to sleep. But hearing him there for the third time, I knew I couldn't avoid the truth any longer.

I wondered why she hadn't told me what he'd been doing to her, and I could only assume that he had either blackmailed her, or she was too afraid to stand up to the man our mother blindly trusted.

Nausea attacked my gut in waves as I forced myself out of bed. I made my way to the door, quietly opening it and moving down the hallway. I wasn't sure what exactly I was going to do, just knew he needed to be confronted. He made my mom happy for reasons incomprehensible to me, but that didn't matter. If he was violating my sister, I didn't care if he made my mother the happiest person on earth.

I came into the kitchen, met with the sight of him drinking water from a glass. The windows were open, streaks of pale moonbeams lighting up his side profile. He was a large man, husky and tall. He could easily overpower me, yet I felt an uncontrollable rage upon seeing him. He was a drunk, he'd been leeching off our family's savings while he still hadn't found work, and now I'd come to find out he was also a sick pig that preyed on my sister while still pretending to be in love with my mother.

He must've been the worst human being I'd ever known, and I felt disgusted even looking at him.

I should have taken a moment to ask him what he'd been doing. I should have calmed myself down when I felt the red-hot fury that boiled like smelting metal in my veins. But I didn't.

And that was my first mistake.

"You're a monster, you know that?" my voice rang out in the quiet room, echoing off the walls. He jumped and spun around with wide eyes.

"Kat, what are you doing up?" he asked. He didn't seem drunk like I'd first thought.

"I could ask you the same thing. Did you think I wouldn't notice you sneaking into Anna's room at night?" I stepped closer, and when he backed up, his nerves only seemed to confirm my suspicions.

"Why don't you calm down first so I can-"

"Calm down? Don't tell me to calm down, you repulsive bastard!" I shouted, hitting the glass out of his hand and sending it straight into the wall where it exploded into shards, the shattering crash barely processing in my mind. I shoved his shoulders and he stumbled back, hitting the edge of the table. A yowled and then he was lunging toward me, shoving me back and sending me to the floor.

"You little bitch! You've always had it out for me! I knew you were crazy but I didn't think you'd snap like this."

He crouched down so he was in front of me and I immediately grabbed his neck, pulling him down to the floor with me. I got on top of him and dug my fingers into his throat, clenching my jaw as I watched him choke and sputter for oxygen.

"Kat! What the hell are you doing?! Let him go!" my mother's shrill voice rang out. I barely spared her a glance, too consumed by rage to acknowledge her or listen to her words.

My second mistake.

I continued tightening my hold around his neck, hoping I could just make him lose consciousness before my mom pulled me off of him, but she seemed stuck to her place anyway.

His face was bright red when he managed to bring his knee up, connecting it to my gut. I wheezed as the wind was knocked out of me, and he took the chance to shove me off of him. He got to his feet, dragging me up by yanking on a fistful of my hair.

"Your insane daughter attacked me for no fucking reason," he hissed, pulling my hair again.

"You liar!" I screamed, elbowing him in the stomach as hard as I could. He bellowed out in pain and let go of my hair, but before I could do anything he slapped me with so much force that I hit the ground again, my head bouncing off the floor with a crack. My vision went fuzzy and speckled with black while my head spun.

"STOP IT!" my mom screamed again, probably too frightened to get in between us.

He ignored her, too furious with me by then to quit. He stepped closer to me and I could see the dangerous ice in his eyes as he looked down at me. I wondered in disgust, Is this how he looks at her when he comes into her room at night?

I rushed to my feet despite the sharp pangs that hammered my skull. He was right on my heels as I ran toward the other end of the house, heart racing as I searched for something—anything—to help me stop him, to knock him out. Then I spotted it, skidding to a stop by the fireplace and grabbing the first poker I could get a hold of.

My third and final mistake.

His heavy footsteps closed in on me, and in my panic, I spun around with the iron rod straightened out in front of me. He didn't see it coming, and the rigid tool was suddenly a deadly weapon as he ran right into it, the poker tearing skin and entering his gut, piercing all the way through and coming out the other side. I stumbled back from the jolt of his momentum.

A piercing scream bounced off the walls.

I looked at his face in shock, his expression mirroring my own. We both looked down at the iron stick, me releasing it while he grabbed onto it. His breath hitched and small gasps came from him as he fumbled with his hands, trying to figure out if he should pull it out or not. But he didn't get a chance to decide, his eyes rolling back and his body crashing to the floor before he could.

My entire frame shook with adrenaline and shock and nausea. My mother was suddenly on her knees, leaning over his body while violent sobs wracked through her.

"W-what-" Anna's frightened voice filled the room and I looked up to see her horrified expression. Her hands shook as she covered her mouth, brows pulled together in disbelief.

"Anna, I told you to stay in your room!" my mom yelled hysterically.

"What happened?"

"Your sister. She killed him," Mother spat through her sobs.

"I-I didn't mean to. I j-just wanted to stop him. I know what he was doing to you, Anna," my voice came out shaky and raspy.

"What are you talking about?" she asked through pale lips.

"He kept coming into your room at night. I heard him," I whispered, still shaking from head to toe.

Anna looked at me in horror, shaking her head. "No, no. He needed help, Kat. He asked if I could stay up and talk to him whenever he was tempted to drink. He knew I helped Dad get over his addiction and he wanted me to help him with his, too," she explained.

Bile rose to my throat as I realized what I'd done.

"Get out."

I looked at my mother's furious gaze. She gritted her teeth.

"Don't come back," she stated coldly. When I didn't move, she stood up and pushed me. "GET OUT!"

"So I left. I wandered around for a while, eventually finding my way to that cliff. I didn't have any intention of jumping until the ocean started calling to me. And when it did, it was like it played on my emotions. It knew I was fragile and it used that to convince me to jump," I said, meeting Jimin's gentle eyes. "I guess I understand why now. It wanted to lure me in."

"I'm so sorry."

"For what?"

"Everything. I'm sorry for what happened. I'm sorry you thought he did that to your sister and I'm sorry you killed him and I'm sorry that your mom made you leave," he said quietly.

I stared at him, still in awe at how much he had changed over the time we'd spent together.

"You shouldn't be sorry, Jimin. I hated him since the moment my mom introduced me to him. I hated him for replacing my dad, for putting a burden on us financially and for not doing more to help us stay on our feet. It was my fault for getting so blinded with anger that I didn't stop to figure out what really happened. It's my fault for not listening when she tried to get me to stop."

"You did make mistakes, yes. You could have done things differently and maybe there would have been a different outcome, but you never intended to kill him. And you can't change what happened, so there's no use dwelling on how it could have been different," he paused, moving so he stood right in front of me. His hands held my shoulders as he looked at me directly. "Remember how you told me that I paid for my sins with the curse? That I deserved to be free and to start over?"

I nodded, "I remember."

"I'm saying the same to you now. You care so much for the men on this ship. They're your family and you love them. I've seen you go out of your way to make sure they're all doing okay. You check up on them when you think something might be wrong, you make sure they know how much you appreciate them. You were the first to join Namjoon when he wanted to fight Booth and his men..." he carefully pulled a strand of hair behind my ear. "What I'm trying to say is that your past doesn't define you. You're incredible and kindhearted and that night doesn't change the core of who you are. I don't want you to feel like this is something that will drag you down for the rest of your life. There's so much more to you than this one terrible accident."

I was speechless. His words made me feel better even though I had tried to tell myself the same thing over the years. I'd never been able to convince myself that it was something I could get away from. I thought it would haunt me forever, but with Jimin standing in front of me, looking at me so sincerely, I finally started to believe that I could move past it and escape the torment that weighed me down for what felt like an eternity.

I couldn't find the right words to express how grateful I was to him, so I simply pulled him into me, wrapping my arms around his waist. He stiffened in surprise before slowly melting closer to me, his body molding to mine in a way that made me feel whole.

• • •

Author's Note:

So we finally know of Kat's past and what led her to nearly becoming a siren. In fact, she would have become one if Yoongi hadn't shown up to save her.

What did you think of how Jimin responded to her story?

I'm working hard on the next chapter already, so I'm hoping to update pretty soon after this one (a couple of days, most likely).

Prepare for a surprise or two and Yoongi's destination to be revealed!

Lots of love,

-Hoseokiiss

June 23, 2019