It's dark, it's loud. My eyes are closed, I'm waiting for my turn to arrive. After a moment that felt like an eternity, I finally hear it.

"And now give a roaring applause for our next idol, Mion!"

I hear the crowd cheering for me, I run toward the scene where all my fans are waiting.

"Are you ready for my cheerful performance?" 

The crowd is screaming with passion.

"I can't hear you all! Even louder!" 

They're cheering for me so much. Maybe I couldn't sleep last night because I had a lot of things to manage, but it's a moment like that that makes it worth it.

I give the best I can, dance and sing as good as possible. They're all so happy, I can see their smile on their face.

They're all so happy, I can see their smile on their face.

They're all here to see me on scene, or the idol I play for them at least.

After that performance, the next idol is sent to take place and I go back in the backstage.

Once I'm away from the public's gaze My body fall by itself, all the exhaustion had caught up to me.

I wake up in my dressing room, I see the manager next to me.

"Rinka, are you okay?"

"Like usual, I just need a bit of rest." Being an idol is really tiring, it often happens that I faint." It's good then, you need to be healthy for tomorrow's photoshoot, so rest well. There's your friend that wanted to see you, can he come in?"

I nod my head, i already who it is. Only one person is all always here for me, and it's not just a friend, it's my boyfriend.

As my manager go out, my boyfriend, Ritsu, come in.

"Are you okay? I was worried!" He's always worried about me, it's cute.

"I'm okay, don't worry. You already know it happen frequently."

"That's why I'm worried." I kiss him while he's lost in his worryness, I usually wait until we're away from my job since I can't get a boyfriend. But I'd feel bad leaving him like that.

"Don't worry, I'll be fine, I just need some sleep."

"Yeah, of course, rest all you can." I hear those words as I fall asleep for today.

I wake up, it's 5 am, so it's time for my training. I need to stay in shape, especially with how much I eat.

I repeat my dance's moves and go for a run. After two hours of sweating, I'm ready for today.

Everything is noted on my phone, So today I need to do a photoshoot, be at an idol event and plan my next concert.

When I see the sun at the window, I regret not spending my summer like others teenagers.

I hear footsteps, it's Ritsu!

I jump in his arms and hold him as tight as I can.

"You feel better?"

"I do, I just needed sleep, you see?"

"Yeah, but don't work too hard. I don't want to see you hurt because of your job."

"Come on silly, I'm not that fragile." I say that but sometimes I feel like I can't go on. Someone else is coming, it's Shinozui, my dance teacher.

"What is that boy doing here?"

"Hello to you too miss. Shinozui. He's just a friend that came to see me."

"Hello, I'm sorry I didn't mean to bother." She looks at him and then ignore him." Your hairstyle is bad, you should fix that."

"I know, I was about to, geez." She's gone as fast as she arrived.

"Sorry my little Ritsy, I'll have to go."

"Oh, sure, but I wanted to ask something."

"What is it?" He looks shy suddenly.

"Are you busy this Saturday?" Saturday is the summer festival, I'll be busy that day but...

"I'll find a way to not be, don't worry." I say as I kiss his mouth. I really love him, and I'm ready to find a way to spend time with him.

We both part way and I head toward my photoshoot.

Everything happen well until one of the staff member approach me.

"Excuse me miss. Mion but we would like to do nude pictures of you, are you comfortable here, or you want to do it with fewer peoples around?"

"What? I never agreed to that."

"Your manager said it was okay." He's going to hear of me, I get my phone out and call him.

"Rinka. Is there a problem in the photoshoot?"

"Yeah, they're saying you agreed to nude pictures of me, I never agreed."

"Well it wasn't planned, but since they're here, I thought we could since it would boost your popularity. The agency did consider lowering your budget because of your popularity decline."

"I'll manage for that, just let me take care of this." I hung up, I'm mad. It's like I'm just an object for them.

But it's true that I'm not as popular as I used to be. I'll need to find a way to be popular again.

I barely had a break today, I need to go to the idol event now. It's where fans can meet their own idols and we showcase our new stuffs.

It's not really songs and concert that bring more money, it's selling plushies and merchandising.

 All I wanted was to bring joy to people and sing like I always liked, but now I feel like I'm just used for profit.

As I start to feel weak, I get a message from Ritsu. It's a picture of a cat, he works in a pet shop.

I'm happy I'm not alone, I still have him and I hope I always will.

Once I'm at the event, I see a lot of flashy color and light. I feel like home in that environment. Even if sometimes it's hard, being with my fans as an idol is the best feeling in the world.

I spend time with my fans, I'm happy I can make a difference in someone's life.

After some time another idol from the agency come to me, I've seen her once or twice before but we never talked much.

"Hey, is there something you wanted from me?" I keep my cheerful attitude as an idol, but she acts more serious.

"We should have a talk." I excuse myself to my fans and follow here farther. After being alone, she looks at me in the eyes and say...

"I'm Fuyuko, we already met but never really talked. I need to show you something."

She pulls out her phone and show me a picture. It's me and Ritsu kissing from yesterday? Why does she have that?

"You know that being in a couple is against the agency policy, you could be in a lot of trouble."

"I know, but I'll manage, thanks for the warning."

"I didn't show you this to warn you, quite the opposite." Her gaze is cold. It's as if her heart didn't beat at all.

"What do you mean?"

"Friday we'll hold a concert, the idol with the least support will have to leave the agency. They're going to purge the idol that aren't worth enough. We both have a low chance to be in a high place, so I'll ask you to retire."

"Or else?" I try to keep my calm, but she's really scaring me. Her voice, Her eyes, her body, everything about her is cold.

"This picture may end up in places it shouldn't be. Not only you'll leave the agency anyway, but you'll also have trouble gaining your fan's trust again. You have until Friday."

She leaves in a way as cold as her personality, she didn't listen to me, she just left.

I get a message from my boyfriend, he wishes me good luck. If I leave him and apologize, maybe the fans will accept me anyway.

No! I shouldn't think that.

I need to get back in and see the fans, they'll be worried to not see me.

I'll find a way to make everything good, for now I just have to power through.

I can't stop now, I promised her.