"Sometimes it's okay,
To not be okay."

-----------°°•°°-----------

As time passed her brain was frozen by the abuse of memories. With a sigh, she puts down the letter. The letter says nothing, they are simply his emotions embodied in ink.

is it possible she is running after nothing?

Could it be that he did it on impulse?

On what basis is she running this madness?

With her mind fogged with so many unanswered questions with more confusing answers, she feels as if she were going mad. Everything in her mind seems to be hanging dangerously on the edge of sanity.
One more dangerous slip and the thin line between rationality and fantasy will blur for her.

She needed to get out of here, she had to get out here. Picking up her side bag she grabs her Snickers before rushing as though the place itself were suffocating her to death.

Somehow her feet themselves find their way to the gate of her art school even though she doesn't have any business here today, perhaps her subconscious mind does. Contemplating with herself she just gets inside without giving much thought. Well, the gate was in front of her, she was in front of the gate, so why stand outside?

Tyler doesn't ask her much. She simply gives him a bored shrug demanding any type of work that would keep her busy. For a brief moment, he stares at her frowning but lets her be on her way requesting her to collect the drawings from each student. Make sure they have all written down their name and ID number in their respective paintings.

she obliges by enthusticly, for once happy with doing this very chaotic and troublesome job. On her way she comes across a somewhat familiar face, she has yet to confirm whether she would level him as familiar or unfamiliar. What would you call a person who you meet almost every day, but talk less with than a cactus?

She purches her lips peeking at the cavas from behind his shoulder. The canvas was painted with what seemed like less of a painting and more of a fancy design.

He had a theme to follow. Does he even know that?

" You know miss. you should get people's permission if you want to poke your nose on others' business. I wouldn't have denied though." A pair of brown siren eyes meets with hers, as he wheels his chair.

Kylie raised her brows slightly but chose to go along with his craziness. Everything that has been going around her is pure madness. If a little bit of madness won't hurt.

"Then, apology for my crime. Can I please poke my nose in your business?" She asks politely, she is a sorted person who likes to follow logic most of the time. But, can life be defined by laws and rules? Perhaps not. Because her life and mind nowadays have overleaped her own rules. Then, what right does she have to question someone else norm?

Evan glanced at the brunette girl before nodding in the affirmative. "You may," he states calmly. The girl has been suspiciously quiet today. During the two weeks in here, he had seen the girl yell more than the mad old lady at his neighbour.

Do all the girls have high-pitched voices like her? He can't confirm, there aren't many female figures he had in his life. The few seemed pretty normal to him but the pretty brunette in front of him was not one of them.

"You know, when there is a theme that means you paint based on it," Kylie speaks up on her own when she is pretty sure the probability of him speaking up on his own is zero. Zero, because probability can't be below zero. If it were then she would have said it's in minus point. Not just one but three or four-digit minus points.

He points at something in the very far, abandoned outskirts of the paper, that something remained in there as if it has crawled its way in there forcefully but still couldn't get any acceptance.

Kylie squinted her eyes to look at something that seemed like a cloud with a stick shoved up its bottom. " What IS THIS?" she questions in pure disbelief. If this is his divination of tree then it would truly terrify the writer in her.

"A tree. What else?" He deadpans slightly offended by her reaction. Art is art, it doesn't follow any norms. If it did then everyone would draw the same thing. The same way. It's the differences that matter truly. Right?

"Have you ever looked at a tree longer than five minutes?" Kylie questions him ignoring the dampness in his tone. He is an interesting character. Either he is kidding with her or lives with a terrifyingly small amount of brain cells.

"No, I didn't."

"Last time I checked I am not a tree please keep your eyes in its place."

"See, you are irritated. That's how the trees must feel when you artists wiggle at them."

"Unbelievable."

"I know right? People are so shameless."

"Good, they must be feeling grateful that at least one I'm on being acknowledged their misery. Why don't you try building up a community for them? Like - saving trees' modesty, their lives also matter. Community?." Kylie mumbled dryly in boredom. People can only get annoyed at one point, but Evan has successfully crossed her.
What do you tell a person who comes up with such a stupid analysis with a straight face?

Evans' face lit up as he grins slightly. " I thought that too."

🍁

Kylie unlocked her locker and opened the lid just as Rachel stood next to her. Rachel one of the rare moments of her raw emotions slapped her on the head, her ways of letting Kylie know that she has been missed.
Instead, Kylie winced at the force, the lingering fever still holding her weaker.

"Geez, Rech."

"You fucking disappeared off." Rachel reasons scrunching her nose, as if accusing her of a hateful crime.

"As much as I appreciate your concern. I highly doubt a one-day absence can be considered as Disappearing."
Kylie drags the last letter to prove her point. As if snapped back to reality or perhaps her usual self Rachel straightens up wearing her poker face.

"Right."
Rachel's bored reply annoys her more if she isn't already. What is she annoyed at? Herself? the people around her?

Kylie doesn't have the answer to any of them. The striking sense of frustration bugs her every time someone utters a single word in a radius of feet near her.

Lily, the timid-looking brunette approaches them hugging her own decorated notes to her chest. "Brenda has been absent for the entire week. Do you know where she is?" Lily asks her in her usually soft tone holding pure concern in it.

Kylie sighs glancing at her. God, has made this girl unnecessarily kind and sickeningly sweet. Kindness is not an emotion that is valued anymore, treated more as an object by those who only fake it out of necessity. Hence it's an emotion that everyone measures ten times before showing.

Exceptions like lily do exist. But, fate rarely ever becomes friendly to them or favours them at all. She reminds Kylie of her deceased best friend in many aspects kindness being one of them.

"Well, we're in the era of technology. Just a little bit of search here and there, and boom you found her." Kylie states nonchalantly as she drops her bag on the side of her desk.
It's nothing unusual on Brenda's side, she is a busy bee always here and there. She thought to herself as she set more like half laid on her chair. Her arms crossed behind supporting her head in a relaxed manner.

"Yeah, thanks for your very thoughtful insert smartass. We didn't even think about it." Rachel states sarcastically rolling her eyes.
"She got mommy's money. Probably just out there on a foreign trip or something like that." She inserts directed mostly to Lily waving it off.

Dismissing it Rachel went over to her desk. Her mood visibly worsened at the possible assumption of wasting time over someone whom she was barely friends with. Can they be called friends? They are simply two classmates who hang out, two people from completely different States, classes, and lifestyles. What a waste of time!

Lily quite upset with the outburst pursed her lips, her eyes blinking rapidly. Oh, sweet lord! Kylie thought to herself stuck in between uninvited, unwanted trouble.

"She is just on a break!" The lie rolled off her tongue before she could think. But, when her brain comprehends it, the did was already done.

Lily, her eyes shone with newfound hope.

"Really!?"

" Uha, I talked with her." lies are like chains of roses, beautiful more acceptable but still deadly. Once you blurt out one lie, then will come up with another one to defend the previous one than another one. The cycle just keeps going on.

It was a lie. Simply a white lie - she convinces herself watching Lily go merrily in her way. What harm is it if it ensures someone's peace of mind?

🍁

Kylie's skilled hands worked their way into the canvas as she led her brush swiftly. The years of practice are quite clear in her gesture.

Originally she did this painting one week ago.
But, the feeling of something messing within it, the dissatisfaction is what kept her from submitting it, the reason for her constant headache.

Kylie has always preferred loose painting with the touch of deep detailing. Hence she was always much more focused on the small details. The detailing of the piece gives her a sense of satisfaction, while the painting looks much more realistic.

Just the left side and she can submit it.

Engrossed in her work she didn't even notice when a figure emerged from behind, well not until a hard blow landed on her head.

"ouch." she shrieked turning around as she rubbed the throbbing side of her head. "TYLER!" she whined earning a snicker from the other students. while the said man stood there sporting a blank look, void of any remorse as if he hadn't just shaken her tiny brain in her big head.

"Miss. Rivers as much as you love to forget any sort of advice or wise words given to you. let me repeat, Desperation is the killer of art. Be patient and think first instead of acting on impulse." The man with a shocking head of blonde hair dragged the word impulse, reminding his student the same thing for the hundredth time.

"You say I am slacking when I take it slow to focus, now it's desperation when I am working fast. What am I supposed to do then?" Kylie complained with a poker face. In her defence, she is trying. How tiring it is when you are trying your best, but still it's not enough good.

Tyler sighed looking at his student, her situation was not unfamiliar to him. He was just her age when he started mentoring here and she happens to be one of his very first students who still stuck around.

"As much as I appropriate your effort. Please, don't use such foul ways to make excuses for slacking, Kylie." He glanced at her painting, squinting his eyes to get a better look.

Yeah, yeah look closer, find a stupid mistake- Kylie thought to herself while she fizzed with her butterfly charm ring waiting for his insert.

After what seemed like torturous hours Tyler nodded his head. The course in his forehead eased slowly. "Well, it seems you are putting in effort this time. keep it up."

"Did you just admit you couldn't find any mistakes in my painting?" Kylie covered her mouth gasping dramatically. Who's face did she wake up to today?

"I said no such thing. I simply thought it was better than your previous performance which seems to know the path downwards only."

"Come on it's not that hard to admit."

"Really? Then let me point out those....."

"No" Kylie cut him off with a shrike as she hid the painting spreading her hands over not quite touching it. He shook his head smugly, as he provided to go. "sorry to interrupt your work but the board director requested your presence in his office."

" I haven't done anything." Kylie blurted out as she frowned failing to find a reason she could be summoned by the director herself. That's not a regular occasion for any department head let alone students.

"Once an idiot always an idiot. The director is busy men, I am sure she has better things to do than commit to your shanghais. Well, that is until you have done some national-level crime of course." He retired her suspiciously before leaving.

Not a very long chapter is it? At least not after one and half a month. I am sorry for the delay.

I was kinda busy. Wrote another short story in my mother tongue. But, the most important reason was probably because I lost interest, not in this story but in writing in general.

So, please enjoy the chapter since it might be the last one.

Have a nice day ahead.

19th November 2023.