Hello, this is Kimberly Anderson.

I totally hate my life except some parts of it when I think I am in love with life. To expound on the fact when certain someone with blue eyes named Joseph Anderson comes to my house.

Sometimes when I see him in school I tend to like school for some minutes,  except from the time when I am  freaking out to check if someone saw us. Most of the time I focus in classes and mind my own business with my friend Cathy. Who also doesn't like people much and the best part about her she doesn't ask where I go sometimes.

This is our last day of summer vacation. And I am going to start my junior year in high school and honestly I can't wait to get out.

I am feeling more nervous than I should. This is going to be your last day of your secret heaven. I had spent most of my summer vacations with him. Ofcourse not out in the open in our town of Charleston, Southern California. It fairly have a lot of people, but I won't risk going out with him. Just in my bedroom or my living room.

I get up from my deep waterbed and look out from my bedroom window. Tapping my hands on the glass pane.

Where is he? Is he going to come? Maybe he has changed his mind. Maybe he finally have noticed how ugly you are. Just as I think I would die of thinking such thoughts. I see his Jeep Wrangler in front of his false front door of the piazza. He has a big double-storey white house, with big front iron gates near his false front door.

He stops his jeeps and my heart starts pounding in my chest. Suddenly the clouds turns pink in the sky. The door to his Jeep opens,  his whole 6 feet 2 inch emerges from the jeep.

I feel my breath stop for a moment when I see his big golden hands combing  his brown wavy hair which ends up on just above his neck, some of the strands falling on his head I know how soft it feels, too more soft than mine. He stretches himself, his muscles and hard chest buldging in the process. His blue eyes suddenly diverts at my window and I back up.

Stupid, so stupid. Now he will think you were waiting for him. You were waiting for him. And in not less than ten seconds the doorbell to my house rings up. I wait with bated breath and hear my mother opening the door. I throw myself on my study table opening my AP Calculus book which I am supposed to take this year. I try to focus on  hearing the conversation going downstairs then I hear the shuffle hurried staccato of his feet on the stairs. I open my book and pretend to read some equation which I have no idea about what it is, when there is a knock on my bedroom door.

Ten seconds later my bedroom door is opened. I don't dare to turn my head,
" Who is it? " You well know who is it.

" Have you already started doing Calculus? A minute before I saw you on your window. " His deep husky voice says from behind, directly reaching to my pounding ears.

" You must have imagined it. As if this is the only thing I have left to do in the world. " I say astrigently.

He gives a deep chuckle. " You are always fiery. That's what I love most about you."

The words stills me for a moment. And a silence from the other side of the room informs me, that he too regrets the words.

I pinch my pen hard on the notebook counting to ten. Before I take a deep breath and turn in his direction to see his beautiful face and his ethereal eyes. To be honest he has eyelashes better than girls, he gives me a small dimple smile, which eases my heart a little bit. I consume him with my eyes as much as I can, ofcourse from tomorrow we will continue with our pretence of not knowing each other in school. I will be a nobody with Cathy who is occasionally noticed when someone had to make a snide remark about my fatness or Cathy's ignorance.

" Hey! Are you okay? " He bends down on the floor, his kind eyes looking cautiously at me. As if he thinks i am hurt by something.

You don't care. Say it. Say it. Say it.

But my mouth doesn't listen to me, it acts on its own accord, " Yes I am. "

" Nervous for tomorrow?" He asks meticulously.

I want to say, No. I want to tell him that I am not. But ofcourse when does my mouth listens to me, " Yes " I whisper in the voice that I hate. The voice that makes me feel nervous, pathetic.

His hands, rise up from his lap, slowly, so slowly. He cautiously touches my hand and I try to not to flinch. His fingers starts moving slowly over my hands.

I shakily inhale my breath. I want to kiss him that moment. And just as I move a little bit forward he says the word which retreats me back into my chair. " Do you want to go to school with me tomorrow?"

I try to remove my hands but he clasps it tightly.

" We have already talked about this" I say curtly.

" But it's been a long time. I think. I think, we can...we can..."

" We can what? We can go around and make fun of us? Give people another chance to laugh at me? " I say placidly my stomach churning in my gut.

His hands wrings on mine like a vice. The whisper of smile on his face vanished. He almost gives me a disgruntled look. " I will protect you. Why don't you trust me?"

" Like you did in the Hampton park? "

He freezes in the spot an irresolute look of despodency comes on his face. " That was a long time ago. I... I have said sorry thousand times for that. Just... Just trust me. I will never do that again. "

Tears threaten to fall from my eyes. And shameful reminder of how pathetic I am falls on me. Instead of all of this, instead after so much, what do you want to do? Kiss him? Touch him? Make him touch you?

" You...you should go I think. " I say gingerly.

He stoops back. " Please... please."

" Just.....Just leave. " I force my hands out of his. And push him back.

" Kimberly Listen..."

" No. " I push him out of the room and close the door on his face. 

Author's Note-

This chapter is dedicated to God. Who has given us so much and continues to give us so much in life.

I hope you all are doing good. And please if you read this chapter do tell me about what you think.

Did you like Kimberly? Did you like Joseph?

What do you think happened between them before?