SIX.
PICK A PUPPY

Bex woke up to sound of sirens.

She jolted forward, blood turning to ice and eyes darting around wildly as she momentarily forgot where she was. When she realized that the gray walls belonged to the underground bunker and not her flat, her heartbeat slowed. Bex threw back her covers and scrambled to her feet, wincing when the freezing concrete made contact with her bare feet.

The wail of the sirens was unrelenting, a high pitched wail that grated against her bones and made her shudder. The other candidates had stumbled out of bed as well, pajamas rumpled and faces bewildered as they rubbed their eyes. "What's going on?" Bex asked Eggsy, who was searching the ceiling for the source of the noise.

He shrugged his bare shoulders. "Just pray its not another one of Merlin's charming surprises."

She blew a piece of knotted hair out of her face impatiently. After last night's stunt, her hair had dried in crumpled, tangled waves. They'd almost drowned less than six hours ago. Couldn't she at least get a solid night of sleep before risking her life again?

Then, with a whoosh as the seal broke, Merlin stepped through the door, clipboard and smug smile in place. The alarms stopped as he stood in front of them, his sweater crisp and eyes bright through his glasses. He looked frustratingly well-rested next to the rest of them.

"Good morning," he said pleasantly. "How was everyone's night?"

"Wet," muttered Eggsy, glaring at Merlin.

Bex leaned over and whispered in his ear. "That's what she said," she said with a mischievous grin. Eggsy rolled his eyes, but she could tell he was trying not to laugh by the way the corner of his mouth twitched.

"Bex!" Merlin called out sharply.

She turned to face him, straightening her spine and immediately wiping all traces of laughter off her face. "Sir."

He took a few steps closer to her, face now unsmiling, and Bex remembered what Harry has said about Merlin's Chinese ring daggers. It seemed unlikely, but she wasn't too eager to find out.

"Vulgar language and comments of any sort will not be tolerated," he said. "A Kingsman appears polite and refined at all times, and has the epitome of manners. And, above all, you are a lady. Ladies speak with poise."

Bex laughed. Then, when she saw Merlin's stoic face, she froze. "Oh, you're serious?" she asked incredulously.

"Ten extra laps," he said stiffly.

"Wha-," she began, but he cut her off as he turned to the rest of the teenagers.

"As I was saying, before I was interrupted, your morning starts here. You will complete four sets of fifty sit-ups and push-ups, then meet me outside for your morning run. Ten laps around the mansion. Twenty for Bex," he added, nodding in her direction.

She opened her mouth to protest, but he cut her off by tossing a bundle of gray fabric at her.

"Suit up."

☂

When Bex had finally finished, she took her place in the line, gasping. Her chest heaved as she gulped air frantically, wiping her brow and closing her eyes. Merlin raised an eye at her flushed cheeks. "Ten minute miles, Bex. We'll have to work on that."

She was too exhausted to come up with a snappy retort, rolling her head back and squinting into the sunlight instead. They had assembled in a perfectly straight line on the gravel outside the front of the mansion. Bex hadn't been able to hold in the small gasp that escaped her lips when they saw it for the first time. It was seven stories of granite trimmed with marble, crystal windows decorating the balconies like diamonds. Ivy climbed up spiraling pillars so high she had to crane her neck back to see the edge of the roof. The house was surrounded by endless miles of neat green grass and dark woods with sunlight filtering through the leaves. It was beautiful. Maybe she would've enjoyed it more if she hadn't been subject the torture of running five miles.

"Today was an easy workout. Tomorrow I won't be as forgiving," Merlin added.

Bex's eyes widened. "Are you fu-"

Merlin turned to her sharply. "Care to finish that sentence, Miss Alden? There are still twenty-seven miles to the edge of this property that I'm sure you would be than happy to cover."

She clamped her lips shut. "No, sir. I think I'm perfectly happy with five, actually. No need for more happiness."

He turned away and she felt a breath of relief leave her lips. She tugged at the collar of her jumpsuit, wincing at the stiff fabric. They had each been issued a suit of varying fabrics in browns and grays, along with a plain white t-shirt to go underneath and a pair of heavy black leather combat boots. She shifted uncomfortably, listening to the gravel crunch beneath her feet. The tight laces around her laces and the belt around her waist felt like they were suffocating her, and she thought longingly of her worn jeans and jacket, reduced to ash now.

Next to her, Eggsy looked just as uncomfortable. His rumpled blonde hair and bruised cheekbone didn't match the plaid fabric and high collar of his jumpsuit, and he kept tugging at the sleeves.

"I feel like an idiot," he muttered under his breath.

"You look like one too," she said with a grin.

"Oh, shut up. If I gave you my belt, would you strangle me with it so I didn't have to deal with this?"

"Too messy. Just wait for one of Merlin's surprises to finish you off."

"Wonderful. You're like an overflowing fountain of compassion. Truly, I feel much better."

"Well, what am I here for if not to serve your every emotional need, right?"

Merlin tapped his clipboard, halting their banter. He cleared his throat, the sound echoing over the space. Behind him there was a pyramid of shapes draped in a cloth she hadn't noticed in her struggle to catch her breath.

"As some of you learned last night, teamwork is paramount at Kingsman."

Bex glanced over at the gap in the line of recruits where Amelia should've been standing, feeling guilt claw at her stomach. "We're here to enhance your skills, test you to the limit," he continued.

He grabbed the edge of the tarp, pulling it away to reveal steel cages filled with yapping balls of fur. "Which is why you're all going to pick a puppy."

"Wherever you go, the dog goes. You will care for it. You will teach it. And by the time it's fully trained, so will you be. Those of you that are still here, that is. So, choose your puppy, and choose wisely."

Bex stood back as everyone rushed over, arms stretching to claim the biggest with sharpest teeth or the purest breed. At the bottom, one cage stood crookedly, slightly apart from the others. A tiny puppy with scraggly fur cowered in the corner, its tiny body shaking. She bent down and poked her fingers through the bars.

"Hey," she said softly. The dog whimpered. "Shhh. Hey, it's okay."

The puppy looked at her with brown eyes, then cautiously sniffed her fingers. She starched her hand to pet it, and it flinched. "I'm not going to hurt you, I swear," Bex insisted.

She tried again, and this time the tiny dog let her stroke its head. Bex smiled, feeling its soft fur under her fingers. "Look at you, being all brave."

Bex clipped his collar to one of the leashes they had given her and took him gently into her arms. She cradled him close to her chest, and he stopped shaking. She smiled down at the splotched puppy and took her place back in the line.

"A mutt." Charlie sniffed, looking down at her puppy in disdain. "How appropriate. You common types always seem to stick together."

"Watch it, or I'll cover you and bacon grease and feed you to that thing," she snapped, nodding at his massive German shepard. It snarled at her, revealing sharp, yellow fangs. "Oh look, you picked a dog just like you too. Grouchy, with bad teeth."

Charlie spluttered, and she turned away from him, not waiting to hear his response. Roxy had chosen a large black poodle, which was sitting at her side primly. Eggsy was teasing her. "A poodle, Roxy? Really?"

"What?" Roxy said defensively. "They're gun dogs. Oldest working breed, and easy to train. Unlike pugs."

Eggsy looked up from the minuscule pug straining against the leash in his hand with a panicked expression. "What? It's a bulldog, isn't it?"

Roxy bit her lip, holding back a smile, and shook her head slowly.

"Eggsy, what the fuck kind of bulldogs have you been looking at?" Bex scoffed.

"The bulldog kind!" he protested.

"You know, they have doctors where you can get your eyes checked for blindness. I'd really recommend one."

He flipped her off with the hand that wasn't holding the leash. "It'll get bigger though, won't it?"

She shook her head slowly, a smirk on her face as Eggsy swore loudly.

"Don't worry, Eggsy." said Bex, patting him on the shoulder. "Pugs are prone to obesity, so it could very well get bigger."

"The only thing getting bigger around here is your head," Eggsy grumbled.

"Jealously is a bad look on you, Eggsy," Bex grinned.

"Jealous of that mutt?" he scoffed.

"Shhh!" Bex cradled the puppy in her arms, shielding him from Eggsy. "Percy might hear you."

He raised an eyebrow. "Percy?"

"It's short for Perseus," she insisted.

"Perseus. The Greek hero? Who defeated like five thousand armies, or something?"

"Who slayed like five thousand monsters, more like," she said, resting her chin on the puppy's tiny head. "I could use someone to protect me from monsters," she added, so softly Eggsy could barely hear.

"That pom-pom doesn't look like he could protect you from a butterfly."

"Yes, butterflies are so vicious. That's what's really threatening here." Bex rolled her eyes.

"You need a real man to protect you," Eggsy grinned, draping an arm over her shoulders.

Bex shrugged it off and turned away.

"Like hell I do."

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a quick note:

this was 50% bex and eggsy bantering and 50% puppies and i ain't even mad at it. some chapters might be more fillers like this so i can stretch the movie out into a fic longer than five chapters

anyway peace out homies i'm off to admire chris evans's butt