Chapter 26

Loey

Past...

You could hear how the loud cheers were replaced with gasps. The music continued so they couldn't help but just ignore what happened, but they still stole some glances as I rushed towards Tripp who fell. Liam joined me as we helped our fellow members to stand who just winced and groaned.

"It's okay, Tripp," Liam comforted him, guiding him to sit still as we waited for our manager who called for help.

I glanced back at the stage. The others continued the performance—filling our part. Sometimes, they would look at us with concern, just like the fans, but the show must go on.

Alam kong hindi tama na ipagpatuloy pa rin ang performance at kasiyahan habang may taong na-aksidente, but the audience understands that the show must go on. It's enough that two members are helping him, besides the PR team will definitely do its magic. They might filter the comments about the news, and try to do damage control for the sake of our image, like what they always do.

"We'll update you about Tripp, okay?" our manager said. Even though we wanted to stay by Tripp's side, we couldn't. So, we nodded helplessly and blended in with the other idols as we tried to enjoy the music show.

When we went inside Tripp's hospital room, we caught him wiping his tears away as he forced a smile at us.

"Don't worry. Our manager told us about how you were scolded, and even told you that you almost ruined the show," Baron said, sitting on the chair near the bed. He scoffed, examining our fellow member who was helpless on a hospital bed. "You got into a fucking accident but they only think about the show and our reputation, huh?"

"Stop it, Baron. Someone might hear you, you'll be doomed," Dred said, his voice calm. He walked towards the table on the side as he placed the fruit basket we brought and turned to Tripp. "How's your injury?"

"I only got minor injuries, Kuya Dred. I just really need to rest for two days."

The room was crowded. Well, our group consists of twelve members and we're all here inside Tripp's room. Mabuti na lang talaga na pinayagan kaming lahat na dumalaw kahit na marami kami. It's one of the perks of being a celebrity and being admitted to a VIP room.

"Dapat magpagaling ka na, ha? Ang daya, excuse ka sa training," sabi ni Nathan na nakayakap na sa braso ni Liam.

We spent our night with laughter despite the incident and hardship of our career.

We all have each other, that's all we need.

"We survived so many things together, we can't just stop now, right?" Kuya Eros' voice cracked. He was holding Kuya Kane's hand tightly. He inhaled deeply, looking up at the ceiling. "I know it might sound selfish for me to ask for you to stay strong for us, your group members, but please, stop saying that you wanted to give up."

Kuya Kane didn't say a word.

We're all tired of everything. Now, the oldest member just opened up, saying that he wanted to just stop and give up. Alam kong mas mahirap ito para sa kanya, lalo na maraming bashers na kinikuwestyon ang closeness niya kay Tripp dahil sa aksidenteng nangyari noong nakaraan. Lahat ay nagtatanong kung bakit hindi siya tumakbo nang makitang nahulog sa stage si Tripp, kung bakit patuloy lang siya sa pag-perform, at may iba pa na sinasabing hindi naman niya deserve na mapasama sa grupo na ito. Those harsh comments pierced through each one of us, especially to him. We can hide it in front of the camera, but we all know that it gave us a huge impact.

Then, the lines for our next comeback came where he, Liam, and Tripp only have two to three lines to sing. It was unfair, and they tried to complain. They even posted about it on their social media accounts but in the end, the company ordered them to do a public apology as a punishment for their arrogance.

"Naiintindihan ko si Kuya Kane," saad ni Liam sa tabi ko. Tiningnan niya kami isa-isa at malungkot na ngumiti. "Kahit ako ay gusto nang sumuko na lang at tumigil. Ang hirap kasi, eh. I always convince myself that it's okay; as long as we're doing our best, people will see and appreciate it. Then maybe soon, we will be treated fairly. But you know what? No matter how much I tell myself to hold on, my heart's still aching, and I feel like I'm losing my sanity already."

Lahat ay natahimik at tanging si Tripp lang ang bumasag nito, "So, susuko ba kayo?"

Liam looked down while Kuya Kane shut his eyes, leaning against the couch.

When minutes had passed and they didn't answer him, Tripp scoffed. "Do you think we're not tired? Do you think that we don't understand the both of you? Lahat tayo, pareho lang ng pinagdadaanan! Pero kailan niyo narinig sa amin ang pagsuko? Kuya Kane, Kuya Liam, sana isipin ninyo rin kami. Please naman, oh. We're all drained, but we have each other to rely on, remember?"

"Sorry, guys," Kuya Kane said. He smiled at our leader, Kuya Eros. "As long as I have you guys, I'll be fine. Screw those lines, and screw those haters. You're all I need. Maybe I'm just really tired that's why I thought of giving up. Sorry."

In the end, we all promised to stay together until we're old. But I guess promises are really meant to be broken.

Lahat kami ay sinundan ng tingin ang manager namin na may dalang maleta. He walked inside the room of Kuya Kane and Tripp without glancing at us. We all looked at each other before following him.

"What's going on?" our leader asked. "Why are you packing Kane's things? Nasaan ba siya? May nangyari bang masama?"

Our manager gave us an apologetic look before continuing what he's doing and said, "Mr. Lee will soon call you in his office. Just wait for it, okay?"

I was the first to walk out, and I locked myself inside my room. Shutting my eyes down, I inhaled deeply, wishing the heaviness inside my chest to fade away. We all had an idea about what's going on, but we're still in denial. I mean, hindi naman siguro kayang gawin ni Kuya Kane na iwan kami, 'di ba? Ilang araw na siyang hindi uwuuwi rito sa dorm, pero iniisip namin na baka nagpapalamig lang siya. Iyon pala, parang mangyayari na iyong kinatatakutan namin.

Halos lahat ng taong madadaanan namin ay napapatingin sa amin. I don't like how they stared at us with pity. We all tried to ignore them as we walked inside the office of the vice president. Tahimik lang kaming lahat habang malungkot naman kaming tiningnan ni Mr. Lee.

He heaved a deep sigh. "I know this would be hard for you, guys. But, Kane suddenly canceled his contract and decided to leave the company, though we're still processing it. He was eager to leave the group, that's why I sent your manager to fetch his things."

I balled my fist as I felt Tripp's grip on my shoulder. My eyes caught how Kuya Eros looked at the ceiling, trying to hold his tears back.

This is a fucking nightmare for all of us.

"The president was also furious, especially when you're preparing for your comeback, right now. It was a great loss, and we were expecting a huge buzz because of his sudden departure. So, you are being ordered not to talk and get in touch with Kane, or even try to. I suppose that this won't be that hard, since Kane doesn't want to talk to you. He said that he wanted to cut ties with everyone in the company, including his members," Mr. Lee continued. "I'm hoping you'll continue to act normal and don't mention his name on your upcoming shows ever again, okay?"

We all nodded.

Tripp fell on the floor as Baron punched him.

"What the hell, man? You almost ruined our reputation and compromised our comeback, you idiot," Baron hissed. He was about to hit Tripp again but our leader stopped him. "Shit. Bakit ba kailangan mo pang mag-post ng ganoon? Seriously? You felt like Kuya Kane betrayed us? You dragged all of us because of your dramatic post. Grow up, will you?"

He stormed inside his room, cursing loudly. I wanted to follow him but I know that he wanted to be alone as he steamed off a bit.

Tahimik naman na umupo sa tabi ko si Tripp habang nakatingin sa kanya ang iba pang miyembro ng grupo.

"I'm sorry," he started. "I was... I was drunk when I posted that. I wasn't even thinking when I clicked the post button. I'm sorry for messing things up."

Walang nagsalita pero nilapitan siya ni Kai at niyakap. Araw-araw ba kaming manghihina at magiging ganito?

Halos dalawang buwan na mula nang umalis si Kuya Kane pero walang nakalimot. Lalo na ngayon na nagpakita na siyang muli sa mga show, at para bang hindi siya naging parte ng SBG. Kahit sa mga interview niya ay sobrang iwas siya kapag iyon na ang usapan. May isa pa nga na sinabi niya talagang ayaw niyang pag-usapan ang tungkol sa SBG, eh.

"I don't want to defend Kane," Liam said suddenly. "But, I think we should still respect his decision. We all know that he's been branded as talentless members and other things while he's still a member. Maybe it became too much for him."

When he looked at us, my heart tightened. Those sparkly eyes were now filled with sadness.

"If..." his voice cracked a bit, "if I also leave the group, I hope you'll understand. Someday, my strength might not be enough to hold on."

Kuya Jinmin patted him on his shoulder. "Lili, we're here for you, okay? But, I hope that's enough for you to find the strength to hold on and continue. Don't just abandon us," He chuckled. "I sound like a selfish person."

He was the closest to Liam, that's why I could sense that the idea of Liam's departure pains him.

However, one day the idea became the reality as Liam announced that he sued the company to terminate his contract. We didn't say a word, but I know that he knew how disappointed we were. How he hurt us with what he did. Kane already left us months ago. Now, he was leaving us. He didn't explain himself and he didn't even apologize for his sudden decision.

Ganoon lang ba talaga kami kadaling iwan? Wala lang ba lahat ng pinagsamahan namin para magdesisyon sila bigla na umalis sa grupo?

"Hey, stop it, Dred! Masakit kaya," Baron complained, but he was also laughing.

Kanina pa siya kinukurot ni Dred. Paano ba naman, binuhos ni Baron sa kanya laman ng bote ng tubig niya kanina sa stage habang nagkukulitan. Ang usapan kasi ay kay Kuya Eros, ewan ko ba bakit si Dred ang biglang binuhusan niya.

I shook my head at them before adjusting my in-ear mic.

Today's our concert but Tripp's not with us since he had an injury again and he went home to his family while recovering.

"Boys," our manager called us.

We all gathered around him while he was holding his phone. He looked at Kuya Eros and said, "Tripp's father posted a minute ago on his social media account, saying that he wanted his son out of the group since it seems like the company doesn't really care about Tripp's health. Lagi na lang daw itong nagkakasakit o nasusugatan, pero never naging priority ng Empire. It's already trending and I guess your fans were also worried because of that."

I frowned. We know Tripp's father and how disappointed he was with our company, but he still supported his son. Why did he post that now?

"So, Tripp will arrive soon during your performance. We will do some adjustments since I want you guys to call him on stage, do you understand?"

Our leader was the only one who nodded. Hindi maganda ang pakiramdam ko sa mangyayari, pero kailangan kong alisin iyon sa isip ko lalo na't may performance pa kami. I should think about it later, but for now, I need to focus.

"Everyone, as you all know, Tripp had an accident that's why he couldn't join us here on stage today. However, he's here with us and we want to call him on stage to deliver something to all of us," our leader announced.

Matt helped the guy in a wheelchair to go up on stage. He's wearing black sunglasses. I wanted to step closer to him, but we were also instructed to let Tripp speak first, that's why we stood in a corner not far from him.

Kuya Eros gave him a pat on the shoulder before leaving Tripp to face the fans who attended the concert.

"Hello, everyone!" he shouted. My eyes caught how his hands trembled as he held the microphone tightly. "First, I want to thank all of you for coming here and spending your time with the SBG. Nag-e-enjoy naman kayo, 'di ba?" The fans roared when he pointed the microphone to them. Tripp chuckled at their response. "Maraming salamat. We really appreciate you guys and how you supported our group and even our individual activities. Ang swerte namin na nagkaroon kami fans na kagaya niyo."

We all watched as he looked away, inhaling deeply as if he couldn't continue anymore, but he then faced the fans again. Gone was the smiling Tripp as he pursed his lips and with a shaky voice, he said, "To be honest, I wasn't supposed to be here since as you all know and see right now that I got injured. Pero sa tingin ko, karamihan ng nandito ay nakita na ang post ni Papa. As a parent, he saw how I worked really hard to be where I am now and he doesn't like how I always got injured. Kaya sana ay maintindihan niyo kung ano iyong pinanggagalingan ng post niya."

When Tripp glanced at us, my heart ached at the way he smiled. Then he faced the crowd again, gulping. "You know, ayoko rin naman na laging magkasakit o maaksidente kasi hindi lang ako ang nahihirapan o ang mga magulang ko. Alam ko na nahihirapan din ang ibang members ng SBG. They'll worry about my health, then they need to fill my line even though I don't have many lines in every song," he chuckled a bit.

"Aside from that, even when I couldn't practice, I still visited them. Whenever I do, they would smile at me and crack some jokes to lift my mood. But I know that they're tired and are struggling inside. Hindi naging madali sa aming lahat na abutin itong pangarap namin. Hindi naging madali sa amin na ipakita sa iba na deserve namin itong binigay na oportunidad sa amin ng Empire."

Matt wasn't able to hold himself back as he marched towards Tripp and hugged him. Tripp sobbed in his arms while the fans cheered loudly- giving him comfort. Our leader joined Matt, but he just stood behind Tripp, caressing him on his back.

While our two members comforted and calmed Tripp down, he continued even when he was still sobbing, "Our fans and my members know how much I love performing. I love being on stage, making you happy with my dancing. I also like to be in front of the camera with my members..." he paused for a moment, facing us. "Loey, Kaito, Nathan, Baron, Matt, Kuya Leigh, Kuya Jinmin, Kuya Eros... I love you guys. Thank you for being my strength and for being there for me to make me smile. Thank you for backing me up. I will always be grateful to have you guys in my life and to be part of SBG."

I balled my fist, turning away from him as I stopped my tears from falling when his voice cracked. Kaito also leaned on my shoulder, hiding away the fact that he's already tearing up.

"To our beloved fans, thank you. Thank you because you are the reason why I survived and why I got this far. Sorry for disappointing you sometimes. I also love you, okay? You guys will always be in my heart..." another sob while I could hear that our leader was whispering something to him. "The reason why I'm here is..."

"To formally announce that I'm leaving the company and the group. I would no longer be part of the SBG and my journey with them has now ended."

We all thought that Tripp's departure would be easy... but we were also instructed to never mention his name or try to contact him just like with Kuya Kane and Liam. The reason? He had an interview where he shared that he was treated badly by the company. He even mentioned our names who were the favorites and privileged members—that even those two who left before him were treated poorly.

It feels like they all forgot about us already while every time we sing the song they're in and fill their lines, we are always reminded that our group started with twelve members.

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This is one of my favorite chapters because I felt their pain while writing the past of SBG. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and that you got to know them better. 

- Hime