First off, sorry for not telling you I'm not dead. :,>

Now let's jump on in!

DO NOT:

•Use emojis around me.
•Use a butt ton of exclamation marks, 2 is enough.
•Type with no expression to me.
•Talk to me about a topic I have no interest in.
•Try to be funny. You're not. So please don't try.
•Mention non-platonic relationships around me. The cringe is real.

DO:

•Look me in the eye, even when I'm not looking at you.
•Use kaomojis when speaking to me.
•Say "XD" to lighten up the mood.
•Be sarcastic as much as possible.
•Laugh at my retarded jokes. If you don't I'll lock myself up into a cocoon.

That is all for now.