- Thursday, November 9th -

Finnley left me alone at home. When I woke up after another midday nap, he was already gone, leaving me a note to tell me he was going to visit his grandmother and he'd be home around nine.

I can't believe he went there without me, since I kept on having to comfort him yesterday after he ran into Sydney. What do I do if he again runs into Sydney, or his mom? I'm stuck here, without a car, since my parents went to some dinner with my mom's co-workers. I could drive my bike to the hospital. If it wouldn't be a half an hour ride, which I'm not capable of because of my head.

I decided on taking the bus to surprise him with my own visit. I hope he'll be happy that I'm coming after him to support him.

And maybe just to settle my nerves about the fact he went out on his own. I simply can't sit at home, waiting another two and a half to three hours for him to get back home. If something happens, that wold be a long time before I would figure out something is wrong.

I dressed in record time, already starting to feel my head getting heavy because I'm rushing. I take half of the prescribed painkillers before I pull on my coat and head outside, starting the small walk to the nearest bus stop; three blocks away from my parents' house.

I keep having an uneasy feeling about any of this, mostly because I have no idea if Finnley is okay right now. But mostly because I feel both watched and followed; but there isn't anyone there whenever I look around.

My hand automatically found its way to my panic button, which I pull out of my clothes, and hold for the rest of the way towards the bus stop and while waiting for the bus.

They changed the time schedule, causing me to have to wait another 20 minutes before it arrives.

I take a seat on the small bench, wiggling a leg out of nerves, constantly checking my surroundings by scanning it with my eyes.

And I guess I was right to do so, because in less than 5 minutes after I sat down, Emma shows up in my peripheral vision.

Was she waiting, or what?

"You're back, again." Emma frowns, crossing her arms in front of her after she stopped right in front of me.

"Fuck off, Emma." I mutter, turning my head so I don't have to stare at her. She looks better by now, even though I hate to admit. She looks kind of like her old self, skinny jeans, converse sneakers and a coat, over a vest, over a simple top. At least she's not wearing Finnley's sweater right now.

Her hair isn't messy anymore. Her brown curls flow nicely over her shoulder and I guess she went back to wearing make-up.

"What?" She snaps, causing me to realize I was indeed staring at her. She looks down to her clothes, sending me a proud smile. "Gotta look good for my future husband, right?"

"Future husband?" Is she dating someone, or is she talking about Finnley? Please let it be the former.

"Finn. I figured I wasn't looking too attractive the last time we've met." She brushes some invisible dirt off her coat. "There's only one problem for me to get together with Finn."

"Yeah, he's not into you."

"I wasn't talking about that. He's into me, alright? He's just a bit delusional because he thinks he wants you more. It's like... when you have this dream for years and it's finally possible? That's you for him. But it's not like he's really going to marry you."

"You out of all people call him delusional?"

"What are you implying?" She squints her eyes angrily, her hands bawling to fists. "Are you implying I'm delusional?"

I nod, but a little more uncomfortable because she's obviously getting pissed and the last thing I want is some crazy ass bitch to become angry at me.

She already lunged forwards in an attack, catching me a bit by surprise. I manage to catch her, but we both tumble backwards over the bench, me hitting my head on the cold hard ground; off course it's my head.

I push her off of me, crying out softly, grabbing the back of my head and closing my eyes to catch a moment to recover from the initial shock and pain.

"You're an idiot, Cris." She laughs, surprising me because she's not attacking me again, even though I'm pretty vulnerable right now. "Such an idiot. You can't match Finn's intelligence. You're nothing. He's worth much more then you," she sneers.

I open my eyes to send her an angry look. My eyes widening once I notice she's waving around a panic button. The string is cut in two. I frantically search my chest, hoping to find mine, failing to do so.

Oh, fuck.

I scramble backwards, simultaneously trying to scramble up, when someone puts an arm around my neck, grabbing my hair with the other.

"You see, you're standing between me and Finn. And I'm not the only one you ruined things for."

"I've been patiently waiting for you to be stupid enough to go out by yourself." Jeff's voice sounds could, sending chills through my body.

"We would both be happier if you'd be gone." Emma sounds disgusted, annoyed a bit. "So, we're making sure you'll never ruin anything, ever again, for anyone. Including Finn's happy future with me as his wife." She stepped forward, Jeff holding me in place while I'm struggling to get away from him. The last thing I remember is the bottom of Emma's sneaker closing in on my face.

* * * * *

Calling myself confused once I wake up would be an understatement. I have no idea what happened, or where I am right now. All I know is that this bed is very comfortable and I could stay in here for the rest of my life, if people would let me.

But since I'm curious by nature, and I hate feeling confused, I think I need to get out of this bed to investigate my whereabouts. Because one thing is for sure; this is not my bed. Mine is comfortable, but this one is heavenly.

The fact that it's pitch black in here isn't helping to clarify anything either.

I push away the heavenly cover, pushing myself up on one elbow.

Instantly my head feels heavy, it starts throbbing and I get too dizzy to stay upright. It's also causing a faint memory to rise of me on the soccer field, with voices around me. I can see a ball coming close at high speed, and that's about it. So, I got knocked down by a ball? But that's still not explaining where I am right now. This bed is too wide to be a hospital bed and I already concluded this isn't my bed.

I grab hold of my head with one hand, noticing my hairs a bit damp, which could be sweat, but that would simply be disgusting in bed.

I try another attempt to get up, fighting the urge to lay back down as soon as the throbbing starts again and the dizziness worsens. I need to know where I am and why nobody is with me.

I hear a sound closing in, like footsteps on some stairs or something like that. I think it's two pair, now that I'm laying back down, focussing on solely the sound of the footsteps, both pair of footsteps coming closer, right before they stop and the door to the room opens.

I can't help but frown, as soon as Charlie walks in, surprised to either see me here, or surprised that I'm awake. I think it's the former because why the hell am I in Finnley's old bedroom? I recognize the wall full of bookshelves, still filled with the same books as years ago. I take a quick glance, noticing literally nothing changed in here. It's all still Finnley's stuff, it's his clothes in the closet, although there's less clothes. The books are still his books. The only difference is the fact there aren't any piles of books littering the floor. There isn't a sign of studying anywhere in the room.

"You're awake." Charlie sounds surprised, yet... relieved?

"Why am I here?"

"Don't you remember anything?" He frowns, stepping further into the room, thankfully only turning on a small light on the desk instead of lighting the entire room.

"I remember..." There's a strange guy walking inside the room, looking very similar to Charlie, and in some ways also looking like Finnley. I recognize the guy from somewhere, but I can't put a name to the face right now. "Who are you?"

The guy scratches the back of his head, smiling awkwardly.

"This is Sydney." Charlie frowns. "What do you remember?"

"Sydney..." I repeat the name, instantly remembering that I saw him at the hospital. Just by looking at him I regain a memory of a crying Finnley in the car; confusing me more.

"You remember me?" Sydney frowns, crossing his arms, leaning against the doorpost.

I slowly shake my head, keeping an eye on him. "You abused Finn." I accusingly speak up, remembering Finnley telling me Sydney did certain stuff to him, including pictures.

"Did Finnley tell you that?" Charlie sounds pissed off. "Those are lies."

I confusingly stare at Charlie briefly, before looking back at Sydney, who seems a bit surprised, and a bit... guilty. I didn't miss that last part.

"He didn't lie." I push myself back up, slumping down again because I'm still too dizzy. "He doesn't lie to me."

"No?" Charlie walked up to the bed, taking me in with a worried and wondering look. "Like how he kept his depression hidden from you. Or how he told you he was gay, or that he was taking drugs, sleeping around with men, going out with different friends..." He sums up, making me feel a bit shitty, because those are all lies or hidden truths. Those are all things Finnley kept hidden from me. But that's in the past, right?

"Then you tell me what happened." I groan, rolling to my side, enabling myself to take both of them in without hurting my neck. "Why did Sydney leave and why was he kept hidden for years?"

"Because Finnley told the same lies to our parents." Charlie grumbles, looking at Sydney. "Do you mind if I talk to him alone?"

"Sure, whatever. I don't care." Sydney shrugs. "Good luck, because I think Finnley has a big influence on him."

"It's his boyfriend, I told you already." Charlie rolls his eyes.

Sydney shrugs again, before he walks out of the room. "Oh, you better get him out of here before mom comes home tomorrow, because she won't be pleased to have Finnley's boyfriend in here." He closes the door in the same time Charlie slumps down on the bed.

"Cris, Finnley's lying to you. None of that happened."

"Sydney was send to boarding school for a reason, right?"

"Because he was uncontrollable. He didn't listen to our parents, he was aggressive towards them..."

"No." I shake my head, stopping as soon as I get dizzy again. "Because your mom found out Sydney abused Finn."

"He didn't. I asked mom..."

"She found pictures. Explain it to me."

"Pictures?" Charlie takes in a deep breath. "Cris, listen. Finnley went through a lot, with the abduction and my parents hating on him for being gay. But he doesn't have the right to lie like this about Sydney. I know he doesn't like the fact they took Sydney back in, I know he hates them because they refused to accept his sexuality. But it's not Sydney's fault."

"But she found pictures!"

"My mom never found any pictures, Cris. She told me what happened with Syd and that they send him away because they couldn't take care of him. He was uncontrollable." He shrugs. "Sydney has been a great support in the last few months. I can't believe Finnley is still spreading those lies about him."

I just stare at him, feeling confused, mostly because I realize the soccer match isn't the last thing I remember, but I do not remember what happened. All I remember is Finnley crying in my arms in the car, after I saw Sydney leave the hospital with their grandfather.

"Listen, I called your parents and they're about to pick you up. I couldn't reach Finnley, because he blocked all of our numbers by now. Just... tell him to stop lying about Sydney. Sydney deserves better."

"Wait." I call out as soon as he got up. "What happened, Charlie? I have no idea..."

"You got attacked by some guy. That girl from highschool was there..." He frowns, seemingly a bit awkward. "We drove by, I heard a scream, got out to look and they ran off as soon as I called out for them to leave you alone."

"Why did you take me here?"

"Well, what else were we supposed to do? Leave you outside? Your parents weren't home r picking up their phone so I took you here. You're still my little brother's boyfriend, so I guess in some way we're family."

"If only you would be this nice to Finn." I grumble. "Really see him as family..."

"Well, a brother doesn't lie about his elder brother, right?"

Call me stupid, or stubborn; if Finnley says it happened, I believe him. I trust him in telling me the truth. "And neither does Finn."

* * * * *

My parents were pretty upset that I left the house, by myself, in my current state, while Jeff is lingering around somewhere. My mom kept kissing my face, thanking god I was safe thanks to Charlie and Sydney, who came to help me just in time. I do believe the guy who Charlie spoke about has to be Jeff, and the girl from highschool could only be Emma, but I can't seem to remember a thing about it right now. On the other hand, I do now know I injured my head during soccer last week. I knew that off course, but I remember what happened again.

But that only made place for yet another event I can't remember.

And I don't know why I went out by myself. Where was Finnley at that time? It's all too confusing, really.

Mom called Finnley to tell him what happened and by the sounds of it, I'm thankful I didn't call him myself.

That's another small detail; I lost my phone and my panic button.

"Cris?" My mom sounds gentle, her hand brushing a couple of hairs away from my face. "We're home."

Dad helps me to get up, since I had been laying down with my head on my mom's lap. "Careful, buddy." His facial expressions remain neutral while he helps me to stay upright. I'm dizzy and it's causing me to sway a bit like I'm drunk or something. He supports me towards the front door, that my mom opens to offer us entrance. Finnley is seated on the bottom of the stairs, looking straight at me as soon as my dad helps me inside.

His eyes are red, full of fear and worry. His face is tearstained and my heart simply sinks by looking at him. He gets up from his seat, but only to let my dad and I pass while dad takes me towards my bedroom.

"Finny..." I mutter, looking back at him. We lock eyes and I smile carefully, but he doesn't return the smile. He seems doubtful, before he follows us upstairs after my mom pushed him in my direction.

I'm happy once I reach my bed, crawling under the cover tiredly. My head is killing me right now, but not as much as the look on Finnley's face when I saw him seated on the stairs.

"Take your painkillers and go to sleep." My dad sounds just as tired as I feel. "Stay in bed for the next couple of days. Your mom called the doctor already and he told us to wake you up every hour just to make sure you're okay."

I slowly nod, grabbing the bottle of water and the painkillers Finnley holds out to me, taking the prescribed dose, resting my head on the pillow with a deep sigh.

"I'll keep waking you up, okay?" My dad smiles warily. "Get some sleep." He leaves the room, leaving me behind with Finnley in a painful silence.

I offer my hand for him to take, wanting him to come and lay down with me; but he shakes his head, taking a seat on the desk chair.

"What's wrong, Finn?"

"You went out alone." His voice is hoarse, thick with emotions.

"I don't remember why, Finn..." I admit, feeling like shit because he's not willing to touch me. He casts his eyes down again, breaking eye contact. "I don't know why I did that, but I'm sure I had a good reason."

"What's the last thing you remember?" He asks, his voice barely above a whisper, while he's fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

"I don't know what happened in what order, because I only have faint flashes of memories..." I honestly admit. "But I do know you told me about Sydney..."

Instantly, tears start to stream down his face again. He cries silently, still not looking at me.

"Finn, would you please come here so I can comfort you?" I murmur with a voice full of sleep. I'm starting to become drowsy, knowing the painkillers are kicking in.

"Get some sleep, Cris," he whispers while staring at his hands again. "You need to sleep." He got up from his seat, walking towards the door.

I sleepily watch him leave, wanting to call out for him to please stay with me. Because I really don't understand what's wrong right now.

But I can't because my muscles are losing power and my eyes are feeling heavy. All I can do is let him walk away right now, hoping I will remember to ask him about it in the morning.