"You're stupid. You're really, really fucking stupid. How could you just give up on Baylor like that for a shit school like Winterview? Blaine, you have to think rationally for a second, and—" I said, but Blaine interrupted me.

"I thought about it during all the goddamn free time I had when I didn't have you, Arti, or my mom. I'm not too different from you, Amanda. I love my people, too."

"You're going to Baylor, for Christ's sake. Do you know what I would be willing to do to have the opportunity you do? I'd trade just about anything."

"But you wouldn't trade me, or Arti, or your family. Don't lie to yourself."

"Okay, I definitely wouldn't, but I'm not you. You've wanted to go back home for how long, and now you're just gonna quit because we're not there?"

"I think we all know I'm really damn good at thinking I know what I want, but it turns out that I actually want something else. Isn't that right, Arti?" Blaine asked.

"I mean, I can't blame you. I'm pretty adorable," Arti said.

"Yes, you are. But look, Amanda. Yeah, Texas was home for the first five years of my life, but it's not anymore. Home is wherever the hell you two fucking idiots are."

I would have been lying if I said I felt any differently, so I shut my mouth.

Blaine, Arti, Matt, the triplets, and Viktor were home for me.

Not much else really mattered.

"You can't just quit because things are tough, Blaine. That's not you," I said.

"Quitting? I'm not quitting. I'm just going in a new direction, the one I should have gone in from the start," Blaine said.

"Oh fuck, I'm gonna cry again," Arti said and covered her face.

"Would you two please stop with all the feels?" I said. "It's pissing me off."

Blaine laughed. "And we certainly can't have that. Get your shit together, Art."

"I'm trying!" she sobbed.

Blaine turned back to me. "If you want, I'll go through my entire thought process with you, so you don't feel like you're the reason I'm gonna go to Winterview."

"That'd be great. We don't need your guilt transferred onto me," I replied. "God knows I can find enough issues with myself. I don't need any more."

Blaine smiled. "I love you."

The snow began to fall a little harder, and I let myself smile at his stupid cheesiness. "I love you too."

***

When we got home, I decided that I was going to be a liar.

The snow was beginning to really hit us, and naturally, I had to wait until it ended to return Blaine to his mother.

Too bad that wasn't going to be for another twenty-five hours, according to accuweather.com.

To help his mother cope with the temporary loss of her son, I planned to send some Christmas cookies home with Blaine once we finished making them.

"Amanda." I heard a wail as soon as I walked into the door.

It wasn't one of the triplets, and I only knew one other person who was that fucking pitiful.

Viktor.

"Oh my god, will you let me do what I need to do?" I muttered, then yelled back at his voice. "What do you want?"

Viktor came down the stairs. "Oh, Blaine. Nice to see you again."

"Sure," Blaine replied with a tight-lipped smile.

I looked at Blaine with an eyebrow raised, then back at Viktor. "What do you want?"

"It can wait," Viktor said, then looked up the stairs.

"No, it can't! I'm bleeding out! I'm gonna die!" Natalie's voice cried from the triplets' room.

"Oh my god, what the hell is going on?" I asked.

Viktor took a deep breath. "Paper cut. Natalie has a paper cut."

"It's not a paper cut! It was on metal. Now I'm gonna get tetanus," Natalie said, then she poked her head out of the bedroom door. "Do you want me to die or something? I thought you loved me, Viktor."

"Natalie, stop screaming. You're just wasting all your oxygen, and then you'll die faster," Matt said.

"Is this a group project or something? You guys really should have had this handled by now," I said as I marched up the stairs and opened the door to the triplets' bedroom. "Let me see this paper metal cut that's killing you."

Natalie held up her leg, and there was a gash about half the length of my hand that ran down her shin. She put the paper towel back on to hold pressure. I was proud of Matt for knowing that much when it came to bleeding.

I let out a sigh, then turned to Viktor. "How the fuck is that a paper cut?"

"I didn't look at it. Blood—blood—" Viktor stumbled, searching for the right word. "I don't like blood."

"Then make yourself useful and go get the boo-boo spray," I said.

"The what?"

"That's a very medical term. Sorry. I'll try to keep my language more common. Just tell Blaine to go into the medicine cabinet in the bathroom and get the antibacterial spray and a shit ton of band-aids."

"I can do all that," Viktor said.

I put my hand on his arm. "Can you? Can you really?"

"I'm not an idiot. I'll go get everything you need. Just say it slower this time," he said.

I rolled my eyes, but I did what he asked. "Antibacterial spray and both boxes of band-aids."

"Got it." He walked away and into the bathroom.

"Please save my life Dr. Jayne," Natalie said. "Is this what death feels like?"

"It doesn't feel like anything. Sit down and shut up. This is a solid two and a half out of ten on the pain scale."

"You can't assign a numerical value to someone else's pain," Matt said, trying not to laugh. "What if she's actually a three out of ten?"

I smiled. "Then we might have to amputate her leg."

Natalie frowned. "That's not funny. It actually hurts a lot."

I moved the paper towel away from the wound for a second, so I could get a decent look at it. "I believe you. But don't worry, we'll give you a piece of leather to bite down on as we saw off your leg."

Matt burst into laughter.

"So tell me, how'd this happen?" I asked, gesturing to her leg.

"I tripped and fell over Tara's cage," Natalie said.

"Viktor, would you hurry up with the goddamn band-aids?" I called, then turned back to Natalie. "You know what that means?"

"What?"

"That we're getting rid of that stupid tarantula."

Natalie's eyes got wide. "But I love her."

"If you love her, you should let her go. That's what I did with Blaine and Arti," I said.

"Yeah, but they're stupid enough to come back. Tara's not an idiot like them."

I laughed. "Well, yeah, but—"

Viktor walked back into the room, and to my surprise, he actually had the items I requested.

He gave me a slight smirk. "Told you I could do it." He tossed the spray gently in my direction.

I smiled. "Not bad. Now," I picked up the spray, "this is going to sting like a bitch."

"Watch your language. I'm trying to raise little ladies, not train wrecks like you," Matt said.

"Sorry." I didn't mean it, though.

I gave the bottle a test spray, then took off the paper towel. The wound wasn't bleeding much anymore, but I couldn't imagine it felt too good.

As much as Natalie liked to complain, she was actually a pretty tough kid.

I sprayed the boo-boo spray onto her leg, and she grimaced a little, but when I started decorating her shallow gash with Pikachu band-aids, she got over her pain pretty fast.

Immature, yes, but Pikachu made everything all better, regardless of age.

"Is that all you need from me?" I asked, and my knee popped as I stood up.

"Nice," Matt said. "You're officially an old person."

"I'm barely nineteen. I'm not an old person," I said.

"Grandma Amanda." Matt laughed.

"Well, you're a stay-at-home mom, so you have no room to talk."

Natalie cleared her throat loudly, then waved her hand to dismiss me. "You're free to go."

I smiled. "I'm just about to start on some Christmas cookies, if you want to join me."

"What kind?" she asked.

I shrugged. "Whatever we have the ingredients for. I'm not about to go to the store. The snow's picking up."

The wind started, too, and I knew that we were in for a nice Minnesota snow storm.

"Right. Old people really shouldn't drive in the snow," Natalie said. "Their reflexes aren't as good as they used to be back in the good old days."

I laughed. "Seriously, I don't know how someone hasn't beaten you up at school yet."

I went downstairs, and Melissa and Leah had found their way into the kitchen with Arti and Blaine.

"Is it a real ukulele?" Leah asked.

Blaine nodded. "Imported fresh from Hawaii."

"That's so cool," Leah said, running her fingers down the strings.

"Can you play it?" Melissa asked.

"Kind of. I know a few real songs, but most of the time, I just make stuff up to annoy Amanda."

Leah's eyes widened. "Play something."

"I call this one The Diary of Jayne by Breaking Blainejamin."

I wasn't sure if any of them knew I was there, but I let out a laugh.

I couldn't help it. Number one, it was creative as hell, and number two, it was a reference to one of the first conversations Arti and I had with him.

Blaine asked Arti what her real name was, not just the shortened nickname, so Arti told him that it was just Arti. Blaine didn't believe her, so he started calling her Artha (which made perfect sense in his dumb brain, for whatever reason). I asked him what Blaine was short for, and he said it wasn't short for anything. I started calling him Blainejamin, and then he shut up about Artha.

We didn't get along right away during our freshman year of high school, but by our junior year, he was the most loyal person I knew and my constant stupid companion.

"Well, look at that. It's the queen herself," Blaine said. "I thought you'd have to give Natalie some morphine or something to get her to shut up."

I smiled. "Pikachu band-aids did the trick."

"Isn't she, like, eleven?" Arti asked.

"We're ten," Leah said.

"Pikachu is literally the best. Don't downplay his Pokémon powers like that," Blaine said.

"Sorry for offending you and your stupid childhood interests," Arti said. "Wait, I thought Pikachu was a girl."

"Oh my god," Blaine said. "You've said some dumb things over the years, Art, but this might be one of the stupidest."

"What? She has a really high voice."

"Yeah, but he isn't pink or have a heart tail, so clearly, Pikachu can't be a girl."

"Do Pokémons have genders?" Leah asked me.

I shrugged. "To be honest, I barely even know what a Pikachu is."

"Amanda, baby, just don't say anything else. I don't need you to say something even dumber than Arti," Blaine said.

Arti laughed. "He's triggered."

Blaine crossed his arms. "I'm not triggered. I just have strong opinions on Pokémon."

And for some strange fucking reason, I just really loved those two.

"Okay, we're dropping this controversial conversation, and we're moving on to my Christmas cookies. Either you're going to help me, or you're going to get out of the kitchen," I said.

Blaine rose his hand.

"No, being the official taste-tester does not count as helping," I said.

Blaine smiled, then pointed his finger at me. "That's a crucial job. You don't understand the amount of shit I'm willing to put up with for you."

"So you're saying my cookies are shit?"

He thought for a moment, rethinking his argument. "What if they're poisonous?"

"Do you really think I'm that bad at baking?"

"We can never rule out a possible assassination attempt. You're the queen, after all. People are willing to kill for the crown."

Other than the fact that I'd have to try to assassinate myself in that case, that wasn't a bad point.

I sighed. "Okay, fine. You can stay."

Blaine pumped his fist.

It was more of a reward for his effort than anything else, but sometimes even Queen Amanda Jayne caught the Christmas spirit germs.

Leah rubbed her hands together. "All right. This is gonna be just like the olden days, except Natalie isn't here to boss me around. Can I crack the eggs?"

"You're, like, seven," Arti said. "There's no such thing as the olden days in your lifetime."

"I'm ten," Leah said. "I think I already told you that, though."

"Just get the eggs, Leah," I said.

Leah smiled. "You got it."

She went into the refrigerator, and although there wasn't much in there, there was a carton of eggs. She plopped them down on the counter.

"Hey, kiddo, watch it. Those break easily," I said.

"Oh, right. I forgot about that." She smiled. "Whoops."

"It would be better if I cracked them," Melissa said.

"That's the most savage thing I've ever heard you say," Blaine said.

"That's the most consecutive words I've ever heard you say," Arti added.

Melissa frowned. "I just think it'd be better—"

"Look, Melissa, we've been living in Natalie's shadow for too long. It's about time we revolve," Leah said.

I rose an eyebrow. "I think you mean revolt."

Leah shook her head. "I don't know, maybe. But it's our chance to finally stick it to her."

Blaine's eyes widened. "Angst in the triplets' relationship dynamic. This is quality entertainment."

"I don't know, Natalie's usually pretty nice. Bossy, but nice," Melissa said.

"Aren't you tired of her tyranny?" Leah asked.

"She's the oldest, unless somehow, Viktor was right when he said that you might actually be the real Natalie," Melissa said.

I stared at the two of them. I wasn't sure where the hell this was coming from, since politics was typically right up Natalie's alley, and no one could play that game better than her, but I was sick of Natalie's bullshit too. She was beginning to threaten my title of "World's Biggest Smartass."

Viva la revolucion.

"What are we even going to do? Make cookies without her?" Melissa asked.

"Baby steps. We have to start small," Leah replied. "And soon, we'll overthrow her as our leader."

Blaine looked at me.

"Sounds like you've been listening to her too much," I said.

"Well, without you talking all the time, she has more time to talk," Leah said. "It's beginning to drive me crazy."

"Oh, so that's what this is about. Look, I think you're a hormonal mess," I said.

"That was mean."

"I didn't mean it in a mean way, but all siblings fight, especially around this age. Matt and I just about killed each other on multiple occasions, and we didn't even have to share everything like you guys do."

"But aren't you guys best friends now?" Melissa asked.

I nodded. "Pretty much. Even though I irritate him, and he loves to annoy me, I guess we just learned to take the good with the bad. He's always there to help me out, and although I'm not good for much, I try my best to return that favor."

"Grandma wisdom," Viktor said, peeking his head into the kitchen.

I rolled my eyes. "Get out of here. Can't you see we're having a personal conversation?"

"With Blaine, Arti, and Melissa too?"

"Yes, clearly."

Viktor smiled. "I'm proud of you. You sound really emotionally intelligent."

"She said bye," Blaine said.

I looked over at him, then at Viktor.

Maybe the relationships we all had weren't as intact as I originally thought.

My spider senses told me something wasn't right with the self-proclaimed secret friends, Blaine and Viktor.

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Hello, everyone! How are you all doing? I hope you're doing well, and if you're not, then I suggest taking a nap and eating a snack.

In my opinion, it was only a matter of time until things went downhill for Blaine and Viktor, but what is the cause of their declining relationship? Amanda? Or maybe do they know something Amanda doesn't?