The hot water trickled on her bare back. Sara closed her eyes to savor the relief brought by the warmth to her muscles. Soft music was playing in the background. Even under the shower she could smell the lit vanilla candles.

The guest bathroom was unlike the one in her apartment. This bathroom was spacious, too spacious even. It made her feel smaller than she really was. However, Sara was grateful for the ceiling mounted showerhead and the tub she can use anytime she wanted.

The master bathroom was larger, the one she and Ava used to share. It was marble like the guest bathroom and had a mini Jacuzzi they enjoyed so much. From the longing of the hot tub, her mind wandered off to the times where she and Ava would relax and bathe together occasionally accompanied by wine. Her mind traveled back to when she could feel the softness of Ava's skin. She remembered how vulnerable she looked in the dimly lit room, bare before her. She remembered how her touches lingered and how they burned warmer than the water that cascaded on their skin.

She shouldn't be thinking about this but she is. She tried to shake away the flashbacks but they kept on coming. Ava's lips on her, on her neck, shoulders, trailing lower and lower down.

Sara abruptly turned the shower off. She rubbed the embarrassment off her face and exhaled. She shifted her weight to the wall in front of her and cursed herself. She has never thought of Ava this way for a very long time and she was ashamed.

Moments later, she hears the knob turning. She assumed it was Laurel because she already told the maids not to disturb her. She doesn't mind being seen naked by the little girl. She and Laurel had plenty of bath times together and it wasn't new to them.

"Baby Mom's still in the shower"

She waited for a reply but it never came. She turned around to face her daughter but it to her complete shock, it wasn't Laurel. Sara froze where she stood.

"Ava"

The shower room was only separated by glass. No blinds, no curtains. Meaning, her ex-wife is seeing her in full display. Sara immediately scrambled for the towel and covered herself. She could feel her cheeks burning. She looked back to her ex-wife. Ava was wearing a fluffy robe and her hair was down in soft curls.

"what the hell are you doing here?!" Sara pulled the towel impossibly closer.

Ava's face had no hint of shock or guilt that she entered. Almost like she was expecting Sara to be there. The shorter blonde tried to swallow the lump that formed in her throat. Ava had a taunting look in her face as she walked closer to her.

"Joining you"

Before she could say anything, Ava's robe was already dropped to the floor, and then followed by Sara's jaw. Ava had a seductive smirk plastered on her face. She couldn't find words. Her heart was beating so fast and so loud she could hear it over the music. She was immobilized, couldn't do anything but stare.

Ava's muscles were toner than they used to. She was definitely working out more. Sara instinctively eyed her from her face, down to the curve of her breasts, to her abdomen. She could feel the hotness in her core. She stopped herself from staring lower.

"Like what you see?" Ava teased. The taller blonde was a couple more steps away.

"Ava...I" she could feel her breath being pulled out from her lungs. Her breath was shaky with anticipation. "We shouldn't" she couldn't look at her any longer. She diverted her eyes to the floor. When she glanced up to see Ava once, more she finds her an inch away from her.

"We shouldn't what?" Ava whispered, leaning closer.

Chills ran down Sara's spine. She couldn't stop herself from shuddering. Ava's blue orbs didn't let go of her own. She was being pulled heavily by it. They were darker this time, filled with desire...lust.

Ava tugs on her towel and it drops to the floor almost instantly. The room was still warmed up by the shower but the moment the air touched her skin she felt goosebumps. She tilts her head a little higher, craving for contact, for warmth.

She ached for their lips to touch and she knew Ava did too. The taller blonde leans down sealing the gap...not.

***

Sara's eyes fluttered open. She groaned when she discovered what just happened. She just dreamt of Ava...again. Sure she dreamt of her when they were together, but dreaming of her sexually when they're divorced is not a pleasant feeling, especially when she's technically dating Nyssa. She buried her face on the pillow and cursed herself.

It's been 4 weeks since the gala and Sara and Ava had become comfortable with each other. They've never gotten in a fight ever since their talk in the balcony. In fact, their relationship has become pleasing. They fell into a comfortable routine of cooking Laurel's breakfast, eating together, Ava dressing her wound and sitting through her physical therapy which had been going so much better than expected, playing with Laurel or taking her out, bathing her, reading her bedtime stories and tucking her in her own room now.

Ava had Laurel's nursery cleaned and renovated a little bit so she wouldn't have to be scheduling where she'd sleep. Sara was hesitant at first, thinking that it was such a huge commitment since they aren't going to stay for long. However, Ava reasoned that if she were to visit, which she promised that she would more often, that Laurel will need a room to stay.

Ava had also started working again. Not heavily, but she would fly to Ivy town and stay there for a day or two before returning to Star City with loads of paperwork. Sara didn't mind but Laurel would ask where mama was and she was always excited when Ava came back.

Nyssa visits them on the weekends too when she was free from work. Ava was surprisingly nicer to her. She would let Nyssa stay for dinner and they would get through it without being mean to each other. Ava started paying more attention to her opinions and what she liked.

Once, she was bored so bored in the house Ava invited her friends over for a barbeque, one they used to do when they were still married. Her sister would occasionally check on her and so does her parents. They would take her and little Laurel out in the park to have some fresh air and chat.

Oftentimes, after tucking Laurel in, she and Ava would go to her home office and talk. Sara would tell her stories of Laurel and what she missed out on but they never talked about their personal lives unless it affected Laurel. They also laid out guidelines when it comes to privacy and future visitations.

Sara got out of bed and hopped into the shower to rinse herself of the dirty thoughts. Everything was going great between her and Ava and she hated herself from dreaming about her like that. Now she has to figure out a way to look into Ava's face without turning red and thankfully she has still a day before Ava returns from Ivy town.

***

Being away from work was hard. She hasn't been taking heavy cases so that she could be back home. However, the small case she has been working on, which was supposed to be ending started to become a bigger issue. New evidence was found that could possibly incriminate her client.

Laurel was really looking forward to the mini trip to the zoo that she has been pushing back. She hated to make her wait but she had to call off because she is going to need to stay in Ivy town longer.

She was itching to come home. She missed Laurel and she missed being with her. The little girl would always wake her up with kisses and will drag her out of bed just so she could cook her breakfast. She missed playing with her and giving her cuddles.

She was only supposed to be in Ivy town for 2 days and now it's going to be extended and she hasn't been away for much longer. She calls Sara to give her a heads up. After a few rings, she answered the call.

It's almost like Sara can read her mind because the first thing that came through was "Hey, is something wrong?"

"Hey...I know I said I was coming home tomorrow but there was new evidence in court and I can't leave yet. We have to wait for three days to see where this goes. If it ends well, I'll be home on Saturday" she explains to Sara further, apologizing that she has to cancel with Laurel tomorrow and that she couldn't come to the dinner with Sara's friends the day after that.

"You don't have to explain Aves. It's work. It's important. Laurel will understand" the shorter blonde responds to the other line.

"Can I talk to Laurel?" She was under so much stress and she needed a pick me up. Hearing the little girl's voice was comfort,

Her heart breaks to a million pieces when Laurel asked if she was on her way home and how excited she was to see the monkeys and pet the lions. Ava didn't have the heart to tell her she couldn't do that so she just listened. She finally breaks the news to the little girl that her trip was going to get extended and that mama couldn't come to the zoo with her just yet.

She hears the little girl ask Sara, away from the phone. "Does mama not like monkeys, mommy?"

"Mama Likes monkeys, sweetheart. She just couldn't go right now because she has work to do"

Before she could say anything, Sara spoke, her voice louder, closer to the mic which means she now has the phone. "She went downstairs. Did you still want to talk to her?"

"I think she's upset" Ava massages her temples. Her headache is starting to get worse and making Laurel sad stressed her out more.

"Tomorrow she will be over it. Don't let it get to you"

Even though it was true, her heart couldn't stop aching from the thought of disappointing her little girl. She thanks Sara and ended the phone call. She still had loads of work to do and it's going to be a long day.

***

It was Laurel's third birthday and everybody was there. Sara's friends were complete and so were the Lances. For some reason they wanted Laurel's birthday to be on the beach. So here they were, in their bathing suits, enjoying the party, or at least everybody is. Everybody but her

It's been 6 months after her miscarriage and she and Sara were already falling apart. No matter how much she hated being here, she couldn't stomach the thought of her daughter celebrating her birthday without her. So she tried her best to be in her best behavior.

She and Sara were barely on speaking terms, but today they were walking on egg shells. She couldn't deny the fact that everybody already knew. Still, she tried until she couldn't anymore.

By the time the party ended, she barely spoken to anyone and barely touched Laurel. By the end of it, she was drunk, miserable, as the waves were splashing on her feet. Everyone was already starting to retreat to their rooms.

It was dark out but it wasn't deep into the night. She downs the last of the whisky and plants the bottle to the sand. She stares into the night sky, trying to find peace amidst all the chaos in her mind.

Moments later a warm, small thing was leaning on her back. When Ava turned around, the little girl almost fell, but she caught her on time, pulling her to her lap like a baby.

"Mama" the little girl giggled. She must have liked the rush of the pull.

"Laurel!?" she hears Sara call out but Ava didn't answer, she didn't need to. She already saw their child with her.

The little girl raised her hand to touch Ava's chin. She immediately felt her heart explode. She barely held Laurel since she lost her baby here she was, staring at her with innocent and pure eyes. She isn't her flesh and blood but she was hers. And she forgot.

Ava couldn't help the tears from falling down her cheeks. She loved Laurel, but that love was clouded by pain, by grief and anger. She hated herself for not being there for her daughter. She plants a kiss on Laurel's little hands.

"Hey little bean" the little girl reached up to wipe a tear on her chin. The little girl kneeled on the sand between her thighs. She gradually brings her face closer, giving Ava an Eskimo kiss.

"I love you too" Ava whispered. "I love you so much" she plants a kiss on her daughter's forehead.

Ava sat her on her lap, hugging her tightly as they played on the sand. The waves softly crashed on her feet as she enjoyed every moment of peace and quiet with her girl.

***

When Nyssa visits, they were usually situated in the living room. Today however, was different. Laurel was with her parents and it's the first time she and Nyssa were alone in the house. They were cuddled up in the bed watching a movie and it felt nice.

Soon the movie was forgotten. Nyssa was now hovering over Sara, kissing her passionately. It's been a while since they have had a moment to themselves and Sara missed her. She pulls her closer. Nyssa trailed her kisses from her cheeks to her neck. The blonde finds herself playing at the waistband of her girlfriend's jeans.

She wanted this so bad. She had been aching for warmth ever since the stupid dreams with Ava. She brushed off her ex-wife from her thoughts and kissed Nyssa deeply. She wanted to turn them over so that she was on top but she couldn't bear her weight, she was recovering still. So she let Nyssa take control.

Moments later her top was gone, and so was Nyssa's. The dark haired woman was trailing kisses on the inside of her thigh as she removes her pants. She bites her lip in anticipation but Nyssa never got to the place she wants her to be. She gets frustrated so she pulls her up and brings her in for a kiss.

She closed her eyes, savoring the feeling. Nyssa was starting to trail back down kisses, to her neck and to the curve of her breasts. She pictures it in her head, feeling the tingles and the heat of her body. She pictures Nyssa going lower and lower. But a different picture suddenly pops into her brain. Ava

She tried to shake it off but she couldn't. She can feel 'Ava' everywhere. The good sensations now feel invasive. "Stop..." Sara opens her eyes to see the confused Nyssa.

"What's wrong?" the blonde can hear the disappointment in her voice..

"I'm sorry...I umm. It's just. It feels wrong" Nyssa frowned even more.

Sara sits up and pulls the duvet to her. "It's just... making out with your girlfriend in your ex- wife's house isn't really...ideal" She scrunched up her face. The thought kind of dawned on to Nyssa too.

"You're right... I... I'm sorry" Nyssa pulls up the bra strap that hanged off her shoulder. She scoots closer to Sara. The blonde knows she's disappointed and she couldn't stop herself from feeling guilty. She plants a chaste kiss on Nyssa's lips.

"I...I should probably get going. I leave today for Tibet" Nyssa stood to find her clothes and Sara started getting dressed too.

"That's today?" Staying in the house without doing anything was making her lose track of time.

"Yeah my father insisted I come to the site because he wants to throw a party..." Nyssa was cut off by the ring on the house phone.

"I'm sorry.. Hold on" Sara picks up the phone. The other phone on the line was speaking hastily. Sara's knees weaken when the person finished speaking. "Where are you... okay? I'm coming" Her voice was cracking and she was almost on the verge of crying.

"What's wrong?" Asked Nyssa.

"Laurel was in an accident"