Chapter Fifteen

Liar

"Why did you choose Masbate?" I asked Adam once.

"It's where my Mom and Dad met." He answered with a smile. Pagkatapos ay tinitigan niya ako. "And this place is where I met you."

Ngumiti na lang din ako sa sinabi niya.

Many times I tried to make Adam go home to Germany. Kung nasaan ang pamilya niya na mapoprotektahan siya. But he wouldn't just do it. Hanggang sa nagtatanong na rin siya sa akin kung bakit parang pinapauwi ko na nga siya sa kanila... Because that's what I want him to do right now.

"Do we have a problem..." Naguguluhan nang sinabi ni Adam pagkatapos ng ilang beses ko na ring pagsusubok sa topic na pag-uwi niya sa kanila.

Umiling ako. "Wala. Magtatapos na kasi ang semester... at may mahaba rin tayong bakasyon. Uuwi ako sa amin. Kaya mas maganda siguro kung umuwi ka rin sa inyo." sabi ko.

Pero naisip ko rin na kung uuwi nga si Adam sa Germany ay babalik pa rin siya rito sa Masbate kapag may pasok na naman kami sa university.

Umiling sa akin si Adam. "I can't leave the farm. Harvest din." He said looking at me.

Isa pa iyan. Hindi ko na yata alam ang gagawin ko... But I knew that I needed to do something.

Nakipagkita ako kay Kuya Levi para muling magmakaawa sa kaniya... Mabuti naman at hindi pa siya nakakabalik ng Negros. At nandito pa rin siya sa Masbate.

"Sinabi mo na ba kanila Mama... Kay Kuya Aldrich..."

Umiling siya. "No... But I can't keep this for long."

Nagkatinginan kami. I'm glad that he's like helping me... Kahit parang hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala. Because he's Levi Archibald Zachmann. The least I have spent time with or talk to among the Zachmann siblings. Kaya hindi ko talaga inasahan ito pero nagpapasalamat ako.

"I'm doing it. Papauwiin ko si Adam sa pamilya niya sa Germany. I'll just ask you to give me time for it, Kuya Levi."

Ilang sandaling nanatili lang siyang nakatingin sa akin. Bago siya unti-unting tumango at parang nakahinga ako nang maluwag.

"Thank you, Kuya Levi..."

"Don't thank me." He said.

And that ended our conversation.

Inisip ko pang baka hinihintay niya ako kaya nandito pa rin siya ngayon sa Masbate. At sasama na rin akong umuwi sa kaniya sa Negros pagkatapos kong mapaalis si Adam dito. And I'm ready with whatever punishment I'll receive for not doing my mission.

Ang mahalaga lang sa akin ay mapaalis ko si Adam at masiguro kong magiging ligtas siya.

I thought of just telling Adam who I really am. And about my mission. At pipilitin ko siyang umuwi ng Germany para maging ligtas siya...

But I realized by the way he looks at me now... that it might not work. And I thought that telling him the truth and making myself so bad that he wouldn't anymore think of me after... And hurting him was the best I could do... for him.

Pero nahirapan din akong gawin iyon. Hindi madali at sobrang hirap. At masakit din para sa akin.

I tried breaking up with him. Pero wala rin akong mabigay na maayos na rason sa kaniya kung bakit ako nakikipaghiwalay... At ano ang kasiguraduhan ko na babalik at uuwi nga siyang Germany pagkatapos, and just because of a heartbreak?

May rason na siya kung bakit siya nandito sa Masbate bago pa man niya ako nakilala. He even has plans for his farmlands. Palalaguin pa niya ito.

"Aeva, you've been acting really weird... If there's a problem you can tell me. And we'll talk it out." He gently said as his fingers caresses my hair...

Nakahiga ako ngayon sa braso niya habang magkatabi kami sa kama niya, naked, and we just made love again. We've been doing it many times already for the past months. And it's comforting...

Tahimik lang ako at pinikit ko na lang ang mga mata para isipin ni Adam na nakatulog na ako.

We just fought a little earlier. Dahil sinabi ko sa kaniya na nakikipaghiwalay ako at wala akong maayos na mairason kaya hindi niya rin ako maintindihan. And then after we just ended in his bed.

I wanted to shout and cry. I realized that I want this badly with Adam. Maraming taon habang nasa mga Zachmann ako ay parang wala lang akong pakiramdam... But I learned that I still have feelings... And Adam taught me how to love...

Kung maari lang sana na huwag nang matapos ito...

But reality sucks...

I imagined a scenario in my head wherein I confessed the truth to Adam. I explained my reasons. And then Adam will forgive me. And take me away with him...

We went to a famous beach resort here in Masbate. Pagdating doon ay napaisip ako na may dahilan kung bakit kilala rin ang resort na ito. Dahil pagdating pa lang namin doon ni Adam ay nagustuhan ko na agad ang lugar. After our sem Adam did not go home to Germany. Instead he even asked me if I could stay in Masbate with him and we can go to a place like this.

Parang ayaw na niyang mawalay pa sa akin... At hindi ko na rin siya matanggihan...

"Aeva..." Adam called me in a whisper.

Galing sa pagtitingin sa sarili ko sa salamin ay binalingan ko siya sa likuran ko. "Bakit?"

Mukha naman siyang natutulala pa sa akin... "You're gorgeous." He said.

Nagbuntong-hininga ako at napangiti. Pagkatapos ay lumapit na rin ako sa kaniya. "Let's just go out to the beach." niyaya ko na siya dahil baka mamaya ay kung saan pa kami humantong dito sa loob ng resort villa namin at hindi na matuloy sa pagligo sa dagat ngayon gaya ng napag-usapan na.

And it's not that I didn't want it. Ayos lang naman sa akin. Kaya nga lang ay gusto ko rin naman na ma-enjoy din namin ni Adam ang beach.

Adam smiled. And then we went out of our villa.

I was wearing a white two piece bikini that I think Adam liked. In-order pa namin ito ni Paula online. She likes buying things online at mukhang okay naman. Kaya nagpatulong na rin ako sa kaniya sa mga isusuot ko sa outings namin ni Adam. I just want to be beautiful in front of my boyfriend, too...

And it made me feel normal...

Adam and I enjoyed the salty seawater. I had fun swimming with him. We would even hold hands underwater. We watched the fishes and corals. And I was amazed. Naghabulan pa kami hanggang sa maapakan na uli ang buhangin sa tabi ng dagat pagkatapos maligo at lumangoy. And I laughed happily with Adam who was laughing and happy as well.

"I love you..." I said to Adam almost out of the blue.

Nanatili ang tingin niya sa akin. Until he smiled. "I love you." was his response and he looked really happy. And he was holding my hand, at parang ayaw nang bitiwan...

And it was all happy memories...

Natigilan lang kami nang harangin ni Kuya Levi. My eyes widened and I didn't expect that he'd follow us there. Or I didn't even notice that he's there... Was I too busy with Adam? Or I just didn't care about the world outside when I'm with him in our own little world... together. And I turned my eyes blind and my ears deaf to other things aside Adam when I'm with him...

"Kuya Levi!" Napasigaw ako nang makita kong tinutukan niya ng baril si Adam sa tabi ko.

My lips parted. At halos matulala pa ako at hindi agad nakakilos sa nangyari. Kuya Levi must be right when he told me that I have become weak. Pero nabalik din naman agad ako sa wisyo ko at naging alerto. At handa na akong atakihin siya bago pa man niya masaktan si Adam.

Pero napansin ko rin na parang wala naman talagang balak si Kuya Levi na gamitin ang baril niya kay Adam... I don't know... I just feel like it...

"Aeva... Is this man your brother?"

Bumaling ako kay Adam at hindi ko alam kung tatango ba ako o iiling. Hindi ko alam ang isasagot ko. At napansin ko rin na kahit natigilan din ay hindi mukhang natakot si Adam kahit may nakatutok na baril sa kaniya.

"Adam..."

"Yes, I am Aeva's brother." Kuya Levi answered Adam's question. "And my sister is just here to kill you. But seems like she's not doing her mission. So I'm here to finish her work." He said to Adam.

Napalunok ako habang tinitingnan siya at nilipat ko ang tingin kay Adam na hindi agad nakuha ang sinabi ni Kuya Levi. I understand that he's still shocked... And that he couldn't believe it. He might think that we're just bluffing.

At the end Kuya Levi just made it easier for me...

"What... Aeva?" Bumaling sa akin si Adam.

Tiningnan ko rin siya. Pagkatapos ay unti-unti akong tumango. And it was painful for me, too. But I had to do it. Tinulungan na ako ni Kuya Levi... "It's true, Adam..." Kinuha ko ang baril kay Kuya Levi. I'm not really good with guns. Mas nagustuhan ko ang trainings ko kasama si Ate Asherina na kutsilyo o katana ang pinag-aaralan namin.

Tinutok ko ang baril kay Adam. Tumingin ako sa paligid namin. Padilim na at walang tao roon. "I think it's the perfect place to do and finish my mission." I said while aiming the gun at him.

At this point I'm not anymore sure of what I'm doing. Basta ginawa ko na lang ang sa tingin kong kailangan...

I'd rather that Adam will hate me until the end than put his life in danger because he's with me...

Umiling si Adam. "No... What are you doing, Aeva? Are you playing pranks on me?"

Kinasa ko pa ang baril. Natigilan siya.

"Aeva..." His lips parted. He was still in shock.

Of course how could things turn out this way...

"Who... Who are you..." Parang wala sa sariling natanong niya ako.

And I felt a stabbing pain in my chest. Parang nagdalawang-isip na si Adam o biglang hindi na niya ako makilala...

Sinadya ko ring ipakita sa kaniya na ibang tao na ako ngayon. Na ito talaga ako ang taong papatay sa kaniya.

"But you said... Just a while ago... We did... You said..." si Adam.

I've never seen Adam this confused before. Mukha siyang litong-lito at hindi alam ang gagawin. And it hurts so much. I blinked to stop my tears from coming out. You are not a crybaby, Aeva. I have to remind myself.

"You said that you love me..." nanghihinang aniya.

I can feel my lips and even my hand that was holding the gun quivered.

"I lied. I lied about everything that I showed you and said to you." mariin kong sinabi. I acted so heartless.

He looked at me with his confused, hurt, and unbelieving eyes.

Yes, Adam. Think that I am a liar. That I'm a terrible person. That I lied to you even about my feelings...

Inagaw sa akin ni Kuya Levi ang baril. Natakot ako na baka barilin na nga niya nang totoo si Adam. Babawiin ko pa sana sa kaniya iyon, but we heard people's voices and they're coming our way.

Mabilis akong hinila ni Kuya Levi... And the next thing I knew ay pinapasok niya na ako sa loob ng sasakyan niya... At umalis na kami sa lugar na iyon...