"How scary can you be?"

"Rawr..." I replied. The dreams were now easy to predict, and I could tell the girl was me. I was now 11, and I could tell that I was not in a good mood.

The woman in a lab coat muttered something under her breath, and I caught the words "insolent little child". And apparently, so did younger me. "If I'm an insolent little child, then you're a cruel, desperate old woman. Oh wait... Never mind, you're definitely that,"

The mark slashing my younger face seemed to awake the sensation in my own. "Y-you, you slapped me!" Younger me explained, astonishment on my face. "Yes I did, and mark my words. I'm not like the others, I won't fall for your petty tricks. What you pulled in there, so you could see your family and Adam in the maze... Insolent. That could mess up the trials. So I tell you know, subject A0, don't try them with me," the woman warned. Her hair was half up, it's color a tar black. Her eyes were a dull brown, reminding me of mud. The woman had a pointy nose, and her chin slightly curved up. She looked much older than she was, her looks betraying her. Her skinniness was admirable, but too skinny. Bony wrists stuck out, and made her eyes seem sullen. Her eyebrows were thin at the eye inner corner, but quickly thickened at the edges. She might've passed as decent, except for the obvious anger lines, marring her forehead.

Little me just rolled my eyes, "so, on the original question, what do you mean?"

She composed herself. "We need monsters, for the trials. Something terrifying, and crude. You seem to have the most experience," she smirked coldly while I paled.

"Why don't you send a bunch of cranks in there?" I scoffed, and when she raised her arm to strike I shouted out. "Wait! Okay fine... Do they need to kill?" I asked, still cringing in my seat. "Yes,"

Her malicious smile scared me more than whatever I could dream up. I imagined a creature killing her, it had to be the right way. She had caused me so much pain...

That's impossible. How can my thoughts... My feelings, be melded to the girl in front of me. Not only am I thinking out of my brain, I'm also reliving hers.

The girl seemed to settle in the chair. "I have an idea," I mumbled, and I began sketching on a piece of paper.

After I finished, a morbid expression on my face of what I had just done, she looked over the paper. Raising her eyebrows, she seemed to pale.

I had actually surprised her.

"Good grief,"

*****

"Holy.." The voice called out, and I heard stumbling. I felt my body rigid, sitting straight up, but my eyes were clamped shut, and refused to open. It didn't take long for my mouth to also not function... Again. "Newt!"

I recognized the voice as clint, and figured out that the first voice was Jeff. I heard the door bound open. "Bloody hell,"

I tried to speak out, but now my mouth wouldn't even open. "What do we do?" I heard Newt mutter. "How should we know, you're the one that sent her into a deep sleep with your kiss of darkness," jeff chuckled. What kiss? Wait, all I remember is the maze! I imagined Newt rolling his eyes. The bed sagged down in front of me, the creaking showing that someone had sat.

"Can you hear me?"

Yes

But it didn't work. "What if you kiss her again?" Clint asked, but his tone was serious. "Enough bloody jokes,"

"No... Really?" He replied, genuine truth there. "Gally, what do you think?" Newt asked. I had only just noticed a hand was holding my own. "Whatever will help her," his voice was strong, but still shaky. I felt two hands cup my face, and lips press against mine.

My lungs swelled as I heaved in air. My eyes shot open, revealing a stumbling Newt, and Gally, hugging me tightly. But with that, also came my memories. Getting out, kissing Newt, fainting... And the dream.

No

I couldn't have.

I wouldn't have! "Calm down!" I heard someone shout, as my hyperventilating increased.

I couldn't have created those beasts!

But I did.

There was no denying it now.

I had created the Grievers.

And in doing so, I killed Adam. "What's wrong!" Newt shouted, Gally pushing him away. "What did ya do to my shuck sister!?What did ya do, slinthead!?" Gally shouted. "I did bloody nothing!" He argued.

"Stop," I croaked, calming myself down. "I need you to explain..." Jeff started. I nodded, but I turned to the glaring pair of boys. "They need to leave,"

The hurt that flashed their faces broke my heart. The probably thought that I didn't trust them. I did, but I couldn't tell them what I did. "I'm her brother im staying," Gally countered, and Newt nodded. "And I have to stay, I'm bloody in charge right now. Alby started the buggin' changing, so currently, hes unfit to be leader right now," Newt explained, defiance flashing his eyes.

I didn't try to argue. "I did it," I whispered, and they leaned in, trying to hear. "Yeah... You saved Alby's life," clint soothed, but I shook my head. "No... I endangered it,"

They looked at eachother in confusion, "bloody... No you didn't," Newt sighed, rubbing his hand over his face. "Yes I did! I almost killed Alby! I killed Ben! I killed everyone who's died in the maze! I KILLED ADAM!" I screamed, sobs racking my body as my hoarse voice burned. "What in bloody hell, are you talking about?" Newt asked, holding my shoulder.

A strange calm settled over my body. What I would say was inevitable, they had to know. It was cruel. "I made them,"

"Enough with the shuck single sentences! Made what Joannah! What!?" Gally urged, fear piercing his eyes.

"I created the Grievers,"

And they worst thing that happened, Newt chuckled. "Oh come on, Joanie. What? Did the bloody Grievers tell you that at your sleepover?" But his eyes were soft when he said it, the three other boys understood me, though.

"Newt she's not joking..." Jeff whispered. Newts face fell, "bloody hell, Jeff what're yah saying? She spent a buggin night in the maze. She's bound t'be a little ranty," newt tried to convince, maybe even himself. "She gets memories. That's how she knows we're siblings," Gally sighed, pain in his eye.

"How can a bloody little girl make those monsters?" Newt spat, disbelief in his voice. "Because I'm one too," I whispered. "Okay... Now this is bloody ridiculous. Youre not a buggin Griever Joannah. You're not a monster. The creators are," he rolled his eyes, "tell me something. Ok, your dream. Did the shuck creators force you to do it?"

I paused, searching my mind, like a metal detector. "Yes," I said, more boldly as I myself mustered up courage. Innocence in me awakened, I'm not guilty... Am I?

"Then she's innocent," Newt said, but Gally seemed unsure. "So... You had a part in the maze?" Gally asked, gesturing around him. And I nodded, silent tears slipping down my face. "And you were forced?"

"Yes..."

Gally didn't say anything, just hugged me again. But it wasn't closure for me. "She should get some sleep, everyone out," Jeff ordered. Newt and Gally vacated, but when they reached the door, they both hesitated, before marching out.

"Clint, get some soup from frypan, I'll get her some medication,"

Clint nodded, grabbed a bowl, and left. "I'm not going to lie to you," Jeff started, and I tensed up. "We're probably gonna have a gathering addressing all this Klunk. But, the Griever information... Is... New. It's very hard to pin point it directly on you, since now you're in the same position as us. But I just want you to know what's happening,"

I thanked him, before I curled onto my side. Tiny pinpricks of pain ran over my body, and I knew I would probably be sore for a while. I knew my friends wouldn't let any harm come to me. The would outvote any banishment suggestions. But I was guilty. No matter how many times I tried to tell myself otherwise, I always came back to that.

I created the Grievers.

And I killed Adam.

So I would get what I deserved.

I closed my eyes as I made my silent promise. "Soups here!" Clint called, overly cheery. I put on a fake smile, and gratefully accepted it. "Here this'll help you sleep," Jeff said, handing me a strange mixture. I raised an eyebrow at him, and he chuckled. "Tastes better than it looks, trust me,"

The hot liquid poured down my throat as I gulped down the soup. Half a bowl was enough, and I set it beside my bed. Jeff and Clint had long gone, something about attending to urgent matters. And conveniently, that was when Alby's screams had emerged.

The concoction Jeff had handed me tasted vaguely like apples, and I relished in the memory when Adam and I first talked. I would be with him soon, and I was sure of that.

My eyelids felt heavy, as if the weight of all the wrongs I've done pulled it down. The splotchy darkness cooled me down, as my breathing began even. I hoped my dreams were blissful, and not taunted by the maze.

Nothing came except for one image, a blurred mass. As it cleared, I desperately tried to claw out of sleep, failing miserably.

The woman from before was standing in my view, and she whispered.

"WICKED is good, Joannah,"