Babe Belisse

The first thing she had to explain was none of what Babe had done was on purpose. But in the grand scheme of things it seemed whatever higher power there was just decided her life was supposed to happen in the way you knock your feet at the corner of a coffee table.

From the ex-boyfriend who wrote texts to another girl under the guise of "Pizza Hut", to her telling another ex-boyfriend that she thought that she loved him as he said at the same time "I think we should break up", Babe just kept hitting the corner of misfortune like it was an open bar.

This time though, Babe had really done herself in.

She had loaned her credit card to her best friend who lived with her, Hannah Davinney, and she had decided that stealing Babe's identity and leaving her with over thousands of dollars of debt was the way to go about clumsily ruining her life.

Babe didn't even see it coming though Craigslist and roommates sometimes don't mix, Hannah was not like that at first. She was nice, overly nice sometimes and at first Babe thought that was just a character flaw of hers. Like spending too much time in the bathroom or being messy.

Never in her wildest dreams did she think she was conned.

Also how long is a long con? Three-four months? Hannah put in two years into Casa de la Belisse (an apartment her parents had gotten for her under the stipulation that after college she would get a job and a roommate to expand the pool of people she talked to).

But Babe never thought once that Hannah was pulling one over on her.

In fact, after her first break up with Sam "The Nacho Guy" Porter, Hannah told her that Sam didn't deserve her. I mean she was right, they were in a theater and he chomped his nachos so freaking loud that when she got up to go to the bathroom she heard it from the very last row.

And as Babe had looked sheepishly, Nacho Guy unashamedly loudly crushed a Dr. Pepper bottle with his head. His actual forehead. And then when she got back he was actually yelling at one of the characters on screen to just have sex with the other lead already.

Babe absolutely melted in her seat at that in embarrassment. The stale scent of root beer and popcorn threatened to bring all her self-esteem to the retro carpeted floor.

However, funny enough the real thing that broke up her and Nacho Guy was that he wanted to have sex with Hannah and he couldn't either of their approval to do it.

He had actually huffed. Like he had actually blown out a sheet of air in their response to his question. Suffice to say, Babe had forgotten the reason why she had ever agreed to go out with him in the first place. And Hannah's loyalty cemented her place as a best friend roommate.

Well that was until yesterday when she had found out all that she had done.

And sadly, she still had this feeling about Hannah that Babe should forgive her. But Babe blamed that on her being homeschooled by a rich governess who had a lot of self esteem issues herself. Babe had  literally caught her crying into her desk about fourteen times, she counted.

So, that's why Babe just accepted this as supposed normal.

Girls betray each other. It's what they do best.

There should be no anger in fate resolving itself by happening.

And yet, her father's shouting voicemails said something very different.

Her father wanted that money back. Babe wanted her friendship back. But both were wrapped up with Hannah and her conning ways. And judging by Hannah's last post card to her, a Las Vegas Pyramid picture and a note that said, "See Ya-Hannah", Babe could only guess what that meant.

Was she pawning Babe's dead mother's engagement ring that was handed down in her family for a high-stakes craps game, or was she deeply devastated that she took her life earnings and ran? It was decidedly the former. Her luck, she sighed in complaint.

Babe had scraped and searched every inch of the apartment the morning after her world came crumbling down.

But there was no sign of where Hannah was headed.

At the time, Babe loved that she could talk about herself all the time to Hannah and she would never get bored or tell her to stop. With other friends this had been a problem, not that she was a narcissist, but she just got anxious at the emptiness between conversations.

So Babe filled it all with her, saying things like watermelon flavoring and the flavor of actual watermelon were so different that just doesn't make sense, but still Babe couldn't separate either from each other.

Kind of like banana flavoring and actual banana.

And don't get her started on strawberry-kiwi, that's a blackhole of conversation that may even take hours to tell the actual depth of her emotions on the matter.

But again at the time she thought she was making a friend.

She thought their easy smiles towards each other meant something. That the talking meant they got each other. That being able to tell the unabashed truth meant there was depth to their connection. But it wasn't even smoke and mirrors or any gas light she realized too soon.

Babe had wanted a friend, she wanted it so bad that the fakeness didn't matter.

The fantasy was perfect as it was. They looked similar to each other too and were even called twins by their neighbors. Back then she would blush and say, "no she's just my roommate we're not related by any means." But then Babe guessed she was naive in her response.

What she took as a compliment was the reason why Hannah stuck around in the first place.

It all whirled in her curly brown mussed hair. Cleaving away in chunky droplets of emerald tears sliding down her sharp pointed cheeks. She sat knee-hugging herself while watching a nondescript Charlie Chaplin film which was the only thing Babe knew Hannah liked.

The memory of Babe asking her why she watched this funny black and white man strut around with a huge black hat and a cane, Hannah had told her why and it astounded her in the moment. But now exactly what had said to her made so much more sense. Foresight had sunk in.

Hannah said to her confidently, " Everything about him is his subtext, all the funny is in the things that you see but not hear." She closed her explanation with a bright grin and Babe got back to chomping away at her cinnamon toast crunch on the counter while watching too.

Babe couldn't understand the draw to her in the subtext, but now she did.

All the warning that Hannah had given her about what she was going to do to her was in the way she carried herself and how she had let Babe invent a trust to put in her to misuse.

Then Babe had given her her credit card to order some chinese food.

And Hannah put her sick plan into effect.

But Babe was more stuck in the "blaming herself" stage of whatever this was.

She created the fantasy that was a best friend and it failing her just made sense.  It was like "oh this is why that good thing happened to me, it wasn't actually good". She sighed in relief that it did make sense to her, but what was terrible was how empty her appartment felt.

It felt like all the money in the world couldn't protect her from people stomping on her feelings.

And she realized now post-Hannah that it couldn't.

Letting go of her muddily reddened knees, Babe fluttered around the apartment like she was a ghost of a place that wasn't hers anymore. But she was sick of being sad about it. So, Babe opened all of her cabniets and she threw the dishes against the wall, even the plastic ones.

Porcelain clattered sideways and cups flew to the floor but it was still empty.

Too empty.

She entered the guest bedroom that used to be Hannah's and she smashed the table lamp off the night stand. It jumped in fear and leaped into pieces scared of Babe's tantrum. When it was done Babe wildly rushed over to her sheets. She tore them off the bed with a Hulk-like display on anger.

"You can't just leave like that!" Babe bellowed out with a tear striking her eyes.

She kicked them down to her closet. The white cotton spurling and not reacting to her angry jumps on top of it. With one final jump she tipped her body over and fell breathlessly against the carpeted closet. A grimmace both locking and tearing her heart away from her at the same time.

"It was a fucking mistake to think I knew you, but I made that fucking mistake, me. A person so who's so calcuative and anxious! I even wait three second after the crosswalk arrow just for percaution! And yet how the fuck did you become my mistake!"

She screamed as if Hannah could answer but she knew she was just freaking out in her roommates closet. She wasn't insane. But flying into a rage is very cathartic she admitted to herself. When she finally came to her senses thats when she spotted it.

Nestled in the corner of her ex-friend's room was a shoe-box.

Without even thinking of privacy she tore it open and emptied it expecting maybe a letter of why she did what did. Not that she could follow up her stellar "See Ya" post card but one could hope.

But when her sullen emerald eyes narrowed to read these last morsels of her friend, she found them to be sappy letters written by a lovelorn friend. Nick Jameson was quite a poor sap indeed Babe concluded after she continued reading the letter.

The first one had started so well too.

"Hey, it's me, I don't know why I'm writing you. I just I'm with this girl Natalie and I've been thinking about you. I know we were high school friends and I made you a charm bracelet (did you keep that by the way?) but do you ever think if circumstances were different..."

And every time the letters were signed, "Love (maybe) your friend, Nick Jameson."

Babe skipped through the letters that went and detailed this guys life out to Hannah.

The last one was dated a week ago and Babe had to wipe her sweaty palms with Hannah's sheets so that the ink didn't smudge so she could read his last letter to herself.

"Look, Hannah, I know I haven't seen you in fifteen years and I have just caught up to my promise to write to you and keep in touch, but you know it's been hard on me. Seeing as eight unresponded letters is kind of desparate I propose you come to a gala with me."

She read further and a line literally jumped out to her, "I'm not trying to say we should give into our childish marriage pact, but what could it harm if we got together again. Revel on old memories. Make some new ones. You don't have to respond just show up the 24th here..."

This time the letter was signed, "Love Please (maybe) your friend, Nick Jameson".

All the letters fizzled in her hands and her mind raced to why she would leave these letters behind. Hannah never mentioned Nick once. Was he as pathetic he sounded in his letters? Or was he like Babe, in love with the idea of Hannah Davinney.

Babe knew today was the 24th, and she knew the address Nick listed as well. Her brows furrowed at the crumpled letter in her hands. Then her father rung her phone once again. Babe let it trill into another voicemail making this the twenty-eigth message from him in three days.

Babe's breathing steepened as she distractedly played the voicemail up to her ear.

"Seventy-nine thousand dollars, Babe! This is absolutely unacceptable! If you cannot get that money to pay off that I will be forced to sell your apartment and can forget about that degree you are there for. I will be stopping all your accounts untill you can pay me your dues!"

As the voicemail rung in her ears she took a deep breath and threw her phone at the wall slinking to the floor again. She was back at knee-hugging stance but this time at the bottom of her ex-friend's closet floor. She absolutely hated Hannah. She had ruined everything for Babe.

All of her plans were tied up in a degree and she had no money now to get it.

Swiping a way a tear from her own eyes her blotchy cheeks flew down to the letter. Nick Jameson was rich. And of everything all Babe wanted to do is hurt Hannah and get her money back. She gritted her teeth but knew what she had to do.

Clearing her throat, Babe rose and got into the shower. All the screams running over her with the hot water. Babe let the flood gate of droplets sink her soul, then she put herself together. Her fanciest dress, her tightest smile playing across her face, and most of all, her biggest lie furling.

She was so used to life fucking her over, ramming into her like a coffee table out of the corner of nowhere.  No more, she issued. If Hannah Davinney wanted to steal every ounce of money from her through friendship fine. That's just fine. But Babe would steal the only thing she had; Nick!

And then they would be even. Even if she didn't have a soul, she knew it would hurt her.

Babe couldn't wait for her engagement photo to be seen by Hannah. That would be her retribution. Wherever Hannah was, whoever she was conning in that particular moment, she would be hurt and that's all Babe needed.