Chapter 12 Daymares

Dr. Nicolea Trinity stood in the Revelation Night Research Center. It wasn't the glossy glass facilities she was used to. It was a hangar at a small airport which was filled with one dead human's stolen research and information which was gathered by his widow and her friends. Nicolea was reading the emailed records Greyson sent her from the Mid-America Pack Refugee Camp. All the survivors of the Revelation Night had been sent there.

In the last three months, most of the humans were allowed to leave to live with family. Many vampires and wolves however, remained. Most still effected by the after-effects of what Dr. Coylier only vaguely referred to as Project Elm Street. A name confirmed in the records Shalom and Saul took from an abandoned research lab. The chemical weapon used in what was a terrorist style attack against nonhumans to turn them into weapons of mass murder. Those who recovered suffered horrifying nightmares, PTSD, and bizarre physical symptoms. The more she looked at it the more she thought about an old horror movie, Nightmare on Elm Street, where every time one went to sleep, their worst fears stalked them. It was a nightmare that followed the survivors into the daylight, a daymare.

Frustrated, Nicolea almost threw her laptop across the room. She needed a full MRI scan, EEG, and PET on a Raver. They knew the activity and neurochemical balance in the brains of those who recovered was abnormal, but how abnormal was the question. And with the Werewolf Monarchy and Covenant Vampires killing all those who went mad and shifted back to their Raver after recovering, the only surviving research subjects she had were the Monarch Mountain Ravers. Nearly a dozen giant lumbering beasts who came and went as they pleased, plus Will and Jake, but Jake disappeared from his cell three days ago.

Nicolea scowled, she was sure Bianca had something to do with it or more to the truth, Galen did, and Bianca helped him by distracting her. She rubbed her forehead, it was complicated. Neither of them had Sealed Ones, and so they passed the time with each other. However, since Bianca's sister had died and freed Bianca of being a cursed one, Nicolea felt like her lover of almost twenty years was pushing her away and she didn't know why. Nicolea's fear was that Bianca was finally admitting she had more feelings for her cursed best friend than she previously acknowledged, or perhaps now that she wasn't cursed, she decided to seek her other half. It twisted Nicolea up inside, she was born a light Fae but was raised by a clan of dark Fae, so getting jealous was almost as easy as breathing, but she wasn't going to be that Fae anymore, she reminded herself. Nicolea closed the laptop, maybe it was time to let Bianca go, to let the soul healer move on to the next patient. Bianca saved her, taught her to love, to trust, to heal, even introduced her to Greyson who changed her life.

Merle Greyson was the most powerful and oldest living light Fae and Nicolea desperately desired to be worthy of his confidence. Before they had shown her the light, her dark life was a nightmare. It still was in some ways, but at least there was daylight in her world now. She closed her eyes, finding her center. Soon the Ravers would come for her, and she would try to help save them as she had been saved.

VvvvvV

Saul's wolf stopped and crouched at the scent of two Ravers and a wolf. Not because of the Ravers, he knew the Ravers, but the wolf smelled strange, slightly sweet and sickly aggressive. Richard turned his head and looked straight at Saul, who remembered he had never been able to hide from that wolf. Saul stood and slowly approached them. Rob tipped his head, then cuffed the juvenile wolf by his side for growling. Saul noticed the youth's eyes had the white haze of the Ravers. Richard growled something and the younger one shifted.

In the span of fifteen minutes, a red-furred Raver was in the wolf's place, then he shifted back to his wolf. Saul gaped at them, as he realized this must be Rob's son, whom he had never met. His wolf, however, yipped happily, celebrating the small victory for the teenager. Richard's lips curled in a Raver smile, which in the past would have terrified Saul, but nearly three months around the survivors of his pack, taught Saul much. Richard held out a crushed plastic bag, there was a rumpled sheet of paper inside. Saul shifted and took it. The note inside almost made him fall down in relief. Shalom was safe.

"Greyson went with James, but I will bring Nicolea, Dr. Trinity, to check them. I'll drive out and meet you at Monarch Mountain with Will."

Richard and Rob nodded, but the young one whined. Saul didn't understand until the wolf crawled toward him. "You want to come with me?" Saul asked surprised. He barked and wagged his tail. Saul looked at Rob. "That okay, Dad?"

Rob growled giving his son the side-eye, the young red wolf rolled over showing his belly and Richard huffed in amusement. The Ravers lumbered away into the forest, and Saul had no doubt they would beat him back. "Come on, son. Can I just call you Red? I don't know your name."

The wolf nodded, wagging his tail. Saul dropped into his wolf, picked up the letter in the baggie, and together they ran back. Saul sent a thought ahead to Will to pack up, they were going home.

Will was waiting, throwing bags into the back of a Hummer, he turned as they approached.

"Saul, Nic wants us to pick her... wholly shiiiittt. RYAN! Oh Goddess! I thought you were dead!" Will dropped to his knees as the red wolf jumped on him, licking and carrying on happily. "Dude! Get off me!" Will laughed. "Come on, shift so I can get a proper hug."

Ryan backed away, head down, whimpering.

"Will, he can't. He only has his wolf and his Raver. Be patient, these things take time," Saul tried to sound upbeat, like he believed that someday this enthusiastic young wolf would be normal again.

Will nodded, understanding, "Don't worry buddy. I got back, you will to. Can't have my tight-end benched! Can I, foxy fourteen?"

Ryan raised his lip and showed his teeth to Will, who laughed.

"Foxy 14?" Saul was confused.

"When I was a senior, Ryan's freshman number on the football team was fourteen, and his dad always called his wolf, the little fox. So when all the girls started chasing him first year of high school, we started calling him the foxy fourteen, 'cause he soooo prreeeettttyyyyy." Will taunted, and Ryan jumped on him, mock growling.

Saul watched his cousin and his friend's wolf wrestling and carrying on happily. His heart broke for them. This was a nightmare, Will didn't know there were plans to kill all Ravers unless Greyson could convince the governments of all the species otherwise.

VvvvvV

Shalom...

Justice was coming a month sooner than I was expecting, and I was not ready. There was no hospital for me to go to, not for a thousand miles. I was so scared and in pain that I could barely think straight, and the only person here to help me was the one who killed Miles and did this to me. It was a nightmare, but I was wide awake, and the sun was shining. Laying against him as I tried to breathe through the rapidly increasing contractions, was the only reason I wasn't screaming.

Half-an-hour later, I was shaking and sweating and fairly sure I crushed every bone in Jake's hand. I felt a sudden hard downward pressure and gasped out, "I think... he's crowning."

Jake laid me back on the pillows and looked at me for permission to lift the sheet and check between my legs. I raised up my knees, trying not to think about where he was looking, only why.

"I can see his... head..." he paused oddly.

"WHAT?" I couldn't help snapping, as I forced myself up on my elbows to face him.

"Uhhh, I... uh, I never expected you to have flowers, I... I mean tattoos of flowers. I m-mean... You're a minivan mom. And, uhhh, well..." Jake stammered. His face was very red as he looked at the flowers on my stomach, before his eyes drifted down my legs noticing the others, then he jerked his head away, looking at the wall instead of my body.

Oh gawd, my anniversary tattoos. I had forgotten about those. "Every year on the anniversary of the day I saved Kenneth from the muggers in Berlin, I get a small coin-sized flower tattoo somewhere on my body. Just like the one I had gotten that day behind my ear, under my hair." Answering vindictively, I decided to rub the history of the tattoos and what I lost in his face. "Every year a different one in a different place, Kenneth liked to kiss them. After all these years, I have sixteen of them from the two on my ankles to the ones on my thighs, and up to the nap of my neck. Last year's tattoo was on the inside of my wrist. See." I held up my wrist for him to notice. Instead of regret, a strange look like jealousy or envy passed over Jake's face, but I didn't have the energy or time to wonder about it. A contraction hit and because he wasn't touching me, it hurt like hell as I hissed profanities.

Justice was ready to be born. I felt the need to bare down, I did as I panted, "He's coming... need to... push now."

That seemed to snap Jake out of whatever state of shock he was in, and he knelt on the end of the bed. "I'm ready when he is. Just keep breathing and push." Jake encouraged.

His attention was totally fixated on our son, as he stroked my calf then rested his hand on my ankle, renewing the skin on skin contact that was keeping the worst of the pain at bay.

I had four very hard contractions before Justice's head came out with an audible pop, on the next one, the rest of his body slid free as I screamed out my pain. Jake quickly wiped his son's face and eyes. I didn't see how he cut the umbilical cord as I laid back trying not to pass out. I smelled it when he pulled some thick binding from a small cup of alcohol and tied it. I was crying in relief as Justice shouted an angry welcome to this world. Outside, I could hear the Ravers howling in happiness.

Jake helped me to sit up and gently placed Justice in my arms, "He needs to feed. I'll rinse him when he's done. We don't wash our pups for the first few days, so they don't lose their mother's scent."

Trembling weakly, I leaned back against Jake's chest, as Justice latched on, making greedy grunting noises as he drank his first meal. I felt so sweaty and tired, I really needed a shower, but I wanted a nap more. Labor was exactly that L-A-B-O-R.

"What do you want to name him?" Jake asked reverently, admiring his son.

"I want to name him Justice after my brother who was killed and Julian after Julia and Richard's son. Richard is okay with it, well, I think he is okay with it, he licked me when I suggested it. But I mean, he's your son too." I suddenly didn't feel I had the right to not share the naming of our son with him. It wasn't Jake's fault how our child was made and if he hadn't been here to help me have him, I don't know what would have happened.

Smiling, Jake pushed a lock of sweaty hair behind my ear, "I think Justice Julian is a very good name."

We watched him together, and I felt Jake's eyes drift over the three small flowers that decorated my breasts as I shifted J.J. from my right breast to the left one, but he said nothing. The afterbirth contraction hit, the pain was like being pinched after pushing out my big-headed boy. He was going to have dark curly hair like me but his father's blue eyes and strong features. I felt myself passing out from exhaustion, but I needed to say something first.

"Jake?"

"Yes, Shalom?"

"Thank you for this. I'm sorry I hate you," I murmured as I slumped, his arms tightened around me holding Justice in place as sleep took me away.

"I know," he whispered into my hair, and I was sure he kissed it this time too. "I hate me too. Just sleep, I'll protect you, my mate."

The dream felt too real.

I woke up to the sound of shouting, that turned to growling and howling. Something was going on outside, something bad. I rolled out of bed, running through the house and throwing the back door open. Saul and Jake were facing off. Jake's Raver was so much bigger than Saul's warform, but Saul was quicker. I screamed at them to stop. Their blows and claw slashes throwing trails of crimson on the white ground, but it wasn't snow, it was hail. I jumped between them and Jake's Raver knocked me to the ground. Saul immediately got between us.

Suddenly, the air got very cold as clouds blocked the sun. The Ravers came out of the forest and surrounded us. It seemed like a hundred of them. The very air felt evil and I shivered violently as I held my bleeding shoulder. Something was coming out of the storm, and for a moment, all I could think of was the Dementors from Harry Potter, only these had great dark wings like Mr. Black. I knew they were coming for me and my son. Saul and Jake both shifted back to their skins.

Saul hauled me to my feet, shouting, "Shalom, get outta here. Run and don't stop."

"Don't touch my mate! You just want her for yourself!" Jake snarled at him, slashing at him with a clawed hand. Jake's eyes were solid white.

As Saul fell, I tried to catch him, screaming at Jake, "What did you do?!?"

Saul laid in my arms, his throat torn open just like Kenneth's had been. I pressed my hand over the gaping wound as his blood pulsed between my fingers. Around us, Demonus Fae and Ravers began to war.

"Please don't die, Saul," I begged as his eyes stared at mine, his mouth opening and closing like he was trying to say something. Too quickly his life faded from his eyes, he was gone, he left me, just like everyone else I cared about.

A dark fae grabbed me, by the throat and pulled me to my feet. His clawed hand ran over my now-flat stomach. I could smell blood and death on its breath. "You arrrrreee ourrrrsssss, wolf queeennnnn," it hissed. "Wherrrr issss theee pup?"

I fell to the ground as something large tackled it. Richard snarled so loud it sounded like a lion roaring. Ryan's wolf dropped my red cloak across my legs, and I remembered Mr. Black's warning. A young female wolf stood beside him holding a basket with a baby in it. My Baby! I wrapped the cloak over my bloody shirt and suddenly everything became weirdly slow and almost silent. Taking the basket, I draped the edge of the red cloak over the shewolf's and Ryan's backs and he looked up at me surprised.

"Come on," I whispered to them. We hurried away.

I looked back only once, Saul was dead in the grass. There were dead and maimed monsters everywhere. Richard was being torn apart, killed. Jake and Joshua were surrounded. On the horizon, I could see a single shaft of sunlight breaking through the clouds and moving rapidly toward us. It was Gerard. My wolf howled at me to flee and forced us to shift into her fur. The red cloak stayed fastened over the three of us as we ran, carrying Justice to safety.

I opened my eyes; beyond the window the world was dark. The faint glow of the few working streetlights did little to obscure the fiery stars above the peaks. My belly seemed oddly flat now that I wasn't pregnant anymore. I was wearing a clean shirt and laying in Jake's bed. He must have bathed and changed me after I passed out. I cringed at the thought of him seeing me naked. I slowly crawled out of the bed. My breasts ached with my need to feed Justice. Just the thought made them want to start leaking. I picked up the robe on the end of the bed, wrapping the heavy navy-blue garment around me. It smelled of him.

Jake was sitting in a chair in the living room, Joshua squatting next to him with a bowl of coffee in his paw.

"What time is it?" I asked, trying not to let the irrational fear that burned in my head show in my voice.

"Almost midnight," Jake rose quickly, Justice squirming in his arms at the sound of my voice. I tried not to tremble as he came toward me. He sniffed, then stopped.

"Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you," Jake said quietly.

"I know. I'm sorry." I could feel tears building, I was in agony between my fear of Jacob and my need to take care of our son. I focused on Justice, "I need to feed him."

"Of course, can... can I get you anything?" His arm brushed mine as he placed Justice in my embrace. Tingles had us both drawing a surprised breath.

"Tea?" I whispered.

He settled me in the chair he vacated and went to the kitchen, I could hear him putting a kettle on. I stretched the V-neck of the shirt to get my sore breast out for Justice who was grunting impatiently. Both of my breasts began to drip, and I couldn't help the groan of frustration as Justice took the first strong pull. Joshua rose and, a moment later, was back with a small hand towel. I stuffed it inside my shirt over my leaking nipple.

"Thank you, Joshua. I turn into a cow when I'm breast feeding, last time I made enough milk to donate it to the hospital," I explained. "So, I hope this little guy eats a lot."

Clouded white eyes stared at me for a moment, then he licked my temple before giving Justice a small nuzzle. A quiet whine left his throat and he looked toward the kitchen where we could hear Jake finishing the tea.

"I'm trying," I whispered. "But it's hard."

Joshua nodded, then rubbed his forehead against my hair, leaning back as we heard Jake coming. I pulled out the almost soaked hand towel and switched Justice to the other breast.

"Is honey okay? I don't have any sugar," he sounded embarrassed, then he noticed my shirt and it was my turn to be embarrassed as he blurted out, "What happened? Are you alright?"

I groaned as Joshua laughed in his Raver way. "Uhh, yeah, I was telling your grandfather, if I wait too long between feedings, I, uh, leak. I basically turn into a dairy cow when I'm breast feeding. With Miles, I donated milk every day to the local hospital. For premies whose mothers didn't have milk."

"That's very generous." His voice sounded proud and I glanced up at him.

He was looking at me the way Kenneth used to look at me, and I gazed down at my tea, taking a sip to hide my discomfort. I didn't want him to look at me in that way or in anyway. I just wanted him to go away so I could stop feeling so torn apart in my heart. A door open between us and there was no way to close it. Jake and I shared a child and were now forever bound together. I didn't know if I could trust him enough to believe this was for real, or just the bond, or just a way to gain my trust enough to take my son. My fear whispered my nightmare back to me, tearing my hope down, and reminding me I never should have stopped running.