Shalom's POV

I huffed as I washed my cup and Joshua's coffee bowl. Through the window, I could see Joshua leading Jacob away. I was trying my best to calm down, but I was so angry right now.

'Should I be drinking coffee?! How dare Jacob criticize me for anything!' My thoughts raged.

Suddenly, pain shot through my belly, almost dropping me to my knees. I took several slow deep breaths. Braxton-Hicks contractions had always plagued my pregnancies, and I was not due for a month. Somehow I made it to the couch. I managed to get the contractions stopped after a few minutes of slow breathing. I decided I cannot let Jacob upset me anymore, it's bad for the baby. I was turning my fear into anger and that was not healthy for me either. My stressed baby needed me to stay calm, I reminded myself, I needed me to stay calm. I wondered how I am going to make it through the next month with the source of my nightmares wandering around the place I have begun to think of as home.

Logically, I knew it wasn't his fault, but my fears didn't care about logic. It took me weeks to stop having little freak-outs every time I saw Joshua's Raver. Seeing Jacob's Raver yesterday, I couldn't even breath. And today, for him to just walk up in his skin, was a shock. I was shaking so hard when I gave him a cup of coffee, I was surprised there was any left in the cup. I had to figure this out before he came back. There was a scratch at the door. Richard was standing outside. Opening the door, his eyes immediately go to my belly and he whined. He always seemed to know when I am distressed, just like Saul. I realized it was time I let Saul know where I was and that I was okay.

"Richard, I need a favor. Can you take a message to Saul?" I asked. Carefully lowering myself onto the porch swing, my back and legs were still throbbing from the contraction.

He whined a little.

"I need Saul to bring Greyson, the fae healer. I need him to check the baby. I'll write a note to them if you don't mind taking it," I begged.

Richard nodded, placing his large hand on my stomach. It felt as tight as a drum. I smiled and placed my hand over his. "Only a month left, and you'll be an uncle. Are you excited to meet Justice Julian?"

He leaned over and gave me a lick, before nudging me with his large wolf head to go into the house. I wrote the note and put it in a ziplock heavy duty freezer bag.

"Dear Saul,

I am back at Monarch Mountain. I was rescued by a group of Ravers the night of the attack, they protected me and allowed me to leave. Then I had a little accident and ended up in some castle near Maroon Bells, but that is a long story. The Ravers, who are led by your grandfather, found me and brought me here. I have been here about 6 weeks. Yesterday, Jacob showed up, and today, the stress of seeing him caused me to start having false labor contractions. Don't freak, I am fine. I just need Greyson, if he survived, to come check the baby. I don't want to hurt him because I am stressing out being around his father.

I am so sorry I took out my anger on you.

I hate to say this because it sounds so pathetic, but I need you. You make me feel safe. I miss you and I am really scared. I know Jacob won't hurt me, but I can't help it that I am terrified, like I was of Will, only so much worse. I can't explain it, it isn't rational, it just is.

Please come. Thank you, Shalom.

P.S. Tell Greyson I managed to get one of the Ravers to shift back to his wolf. It's not much, but it's a start. Maybe there is hope for the rest."

I watched Richard head off with Rob. Ryan's coppery wolf running after them, yipping excitedly. They had never taken him to Westcliff with them. I had notice they always travel in groups of three or five. Not that anything in the mountains was really a threat them, except other Ravers. Two or three days to wait and hopefully Saul will be here with Greyson. I needed to de-stress and avoid Jacob as much as I could until then. I decided first, I'll go water my flowers, then have a bath.

While I filled my watering can and as I waddle toward the Grotto, I just kept telling myself over and over, "I will not be afraid. I will not be afraid. He won't hurt me again. There is no reason to be afraid.″

And my wolf agreed, but somehow, I couldn't get my terrified side to listen; that part of me just wanted to flee. My fear whispered over and over that I never should have stopped running. I just wanted to go home, but there was no going home for me. My family was gone, our home destroyed, and even my cabin wasn't an option, I didn't know what happened to it since the Raver attack. Monarch Mountain was becoming home, but would I be able to stop being afraid and stay... I just didn't know.

As I tipped the watering can over the first planter of chrysanthemums, I catch a scent, piney masculine, like his house. Jacob had been here. I don't think I will ever get used to the whole 'werewolves smell everything' thing. It was unnerving. He was here and not going to be killed now, so I tried to be grateful for small miracles for my son's sake.

I sat on the bench in the Grotto to catch my breath. It was a beautiful day. The sun felt so warm on my face that I dozed off after I watered the flowers I had planted for the dead. I woke to a sharp pain, it was another false contraction. This time breathing barely helped, I couldn't even get enough of a breath to call for help. The Ravers usually left me alone in the Grotto to tend the flowers. Stupidly, I wondered how I ended up surrounded by such considerate monsters, then the pain overwhelmed me and I almost blacked out. I vaguely remembered Cory pawing and nudging me before howling. Others joined him and howled. In a moment, I was back at that night with the Raver's howling around us in the snowstorm, just before Jacob painted the white world red with the blood of my family. Every moment of that night flashed through my mind at high speed as I lost consciousness and my last panicked thought was that I'm in labor and it was a month too soon.

VvvvvV

Jake's POV

My wolf stretched and dropped the duffle from his tired jaws, it was a long climb from the pack town to the place where the hydro-plant was located. I shifted and pulled on a tee shirt, jeans, and boots from the bag. As I walked through the building, I grinned at the plaque on the wall by the office door.

'Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration.' Richard's favorite saying by Thomas Edison.

Mr. Edison had been a friend of Richard's father and Richard had been fortunate enough to meet the legendary inventor when he had been only 10 years old. It had sparked a lifelong interest in all things electrical and mechanical. An interest that had brought him to Denver as an engineer, where Julia was attending an Artists and Crafters convention as a vendor. Richard had walked off his job and wandered the streets to the Convention Center when he smelled her on the late afternoon breeze. And then he searched the venue building for her, following her scent to the parking lot, and to the highway. He had spent weeks searching the mountains before he arrived in Monarch. The first time she saw his giant wolf lumbering around in the forest, she thought he was a bear, a big red bear. Our family laughed about that story for years.

Richard gave up everything, including his father's pack, and moved to Colorado when she refused to leave the mountain of her birth. He almost successfully challenged my brother and I, so we had given him the Alphaship of Monarch Mountain while we focused on running and strengthening the Monarchy. I looked at the picture on Richard's desk, it was the one I had taken of he and Julia when we were building the hydro-plant. They were both covered in mud and grinning like they had never been happier, and my goofy sister was holding up two muddy fingers in bunny ears over his head. They loved each other the way I had always hoped to love and be loved someday.

I shook my head to stop the tears burning in my eyes. My heart ached, I couldn't even begin to imagine Richard's pain. Julia was gone, and Richard was suffering a fate worse than death, trapped in the form that had killed her and their unborn son. Closing the door to the office, I made my way to the machines he designed. Thinking about Quinn Shalom, I wanted what Richard had lost, it was a fool's hope, but I wasn't going to give up on it.

The natural springs from the mountain created a lake and the steep terrain allowed for a rapid water flow year around that produced enough electricity to power all the homes in the pack town. All the turbines were in good order, someone had managed to partially shut the plant down, diverting the flow away from all but two of the turbines. I decided I need to switch the flow to others while I cleaned the ones that had run without maintenance for almost 8 months. I couldn't believe how well Richard's design had held up. The deep-cycle batteries for the backup power were still fully charged. Flipping two levers brought all the turbines online and the power board lit up, everything was in perfect working order. Richard's pet project to get the pack off-grid could probably run for years without maintenance. Checking everything took less than an hour and I wondered if Richard had been the one to partially shut down the plant. I took the extra turbines offline, with only two houses actually using power, one turbine made more than enough power for them and all the street lights.

I stretched again as I stood, looking out at the lake through the large plate glass windows. My back was aching this morning, too long as a Raver had left my muscles feeling sore from being back in this form. There were some dead trees in the water that needed removed before they drifted into the intake on the dam. Probably beavers trying to build upstream. Mentally I cursed the damn water rodents, they always found their way up here in the spring.

The original dam and flue had been built to run a waterwheel for milling lumber. Thinking about how far technology had come in my life was humbling, I remembered when we replaced the waterwheel with a steam turbine and then a diesel motor. Now, we were back to using water for power. Turning natural resources into the provisions as wolves had always done. I loved it up here. Someday I would build a cabin away from the main pack and retire to the solitude offered by the granite peaks and turquoise skies. That was the lie I told myself every time I looked at the lake. Someday.

I was securing the exit door when a sudden pain in my gut drove me to my knees. I felt like I was being torn in half. For several minutes I couldn't catch my breath, my wolf was howling that our mate was suffering and forced us to shift. He left our shredded clothes behind as he ran as hard as he could down the mountain. We could hear the Monarch Mountain Ravers howling their distress.

I practically fell down the mountain as I ran for the town. I shifted into my skin as I ran up the porch and slammed open the door to Richard's house.

"Quinn! QUINN!" I shouted, searching the rooms. She wasn't here.

Matthias growled from the porch.

"Where is she?" I demanded, "Where did she go?"

He pointed toward the grotto, I was in my wolf before my paws touch the grass, running past my house toward the place where we bury our dead. I realized she went to tend those stupid flowers, and part of me cursed the foolish female. She was due any day and she was making a one-mile walk carrying water! My vision started to tint red and I forced myself to calm down. I could not get angry and turn into my Raver today.

Quinn was sitting on the plank walkway, leaned against a bench, Cory and Carl were kneeling on either side of her. The brothers were whining, Carl is my age, Cory is the same age as Saul. I had known them for our whole lives. With a tear-stained face, Quinn was panting like she was having a contraction. She looked so pale.

I shifted into my skin as I rushed to her. "Quinn, what are you doing here?" It came out harsher than I intended.

"I... I came t-to..." She looked up as I knelt beside her, then she cringed away, "WHY ARE YOU NAKED?!?!"

"I was at the power plant up the mountain, my wolf brought me when we realized you were in labor," I said as I leaned down to pick her up, but she slapped my hands away.

"Don't touch me!" She hissed, pushing herself up with Carl's help. "I'm not in labor, it's too soon."

I reached for her again as she swayed on her feet; I tried to sound calm, "Quinn, you're in labor. Let me carry you back."

She glared at me, "You're not touching me. I'm only 8 months along. I get Braxton-Hicks contractions in the last month, it happens every time. I sent Richard to get Greyson. Just go back to doing whatever you were doing or get dressed or something somewhere else. I don't need or want your help," She snapped, "And stop calling me Quinn. Call me Shalom or Mrs. Phillips." She turned and made three step before fluid gushed down her legs and she screamed in pain. "No. It's too soon," she cried out, "I still have another month to go. Oh gawd, it's too soon."

This time I picked her up, carrying her toward my house. "It isn't too soon, you're in labor. Werewolf pregnancies only last 8 months. Stop struggling, Shalom!"

"Are you kidding me? Put me down..." She continued to squirm until the next contraction hit, her whole body went rigid, but she didn't seem to be in as much pain as she breathed through it. Suddenly, she realized where we are going. Her words panted out, "Do... not... take... me... to... your... house."

"Don't be stupid, female. It's closer and we don't have much time." I growled, infuriated, I was starting to see red again. My wolf and I fought the rage with everything in us. Our mate needed us, and we would not fail her again. She relaxed as the contraction passed.

"Take me to Richard's, there is plenty of time," She insisted.

"Look, there is not time. This isn't like your other pregnancies. You are pregnant with a werewolf, you're lucky we are this close to any of the houses." I kicked open the door and carried her into my bedroom, putting her on the bed.

"And whose fault it that!" She screamed in pain as another contraction hit, curling her body against the unbearable pain.

I grab towels and a sheet from the linen closet. Again, she slapped at me as I tried to spread them under her.

"At least, put on some clothes, you pervert," She moan in pain..

"It's just skin!" I glared at her before storming into the closet.

I had forgotten about the whole humans hated nudity thing. I grabbed a pair of shorts from the dresser and a clean tee-shirt for her to wear, her sundress was soaked from her water breaking. I could hear her panting and quietly sobbing. I could smell her fear and pain like acid being poured into my sinuses. Everything was tinting red, and she was just making me angrier by her refusal to let me help her. I reminded myself, to her, I was a monster. I had to show her I was more than the creature that hurt her that night. I needed to treat her like I would a wounded animal because that's what she was when she was with me, and I was the one who wounded her.

I carried the pale blue gray cotton shirt to the bed and held it out in peace offering. "Here, I brought you something dry."

"Fine." She snatched it from my hand, her look of pained hatred had me turning away.

I heard her struggling to take off the sundress. In a low, calm voice I begged, "Shalom, please. I won't hurt you, but I am the only one here. You can't do this alone. Just let me touch you to help you. I promise after today I will never touch you without your consent. Please Shalom, for our son."

VvvvvV

Shalom's POV

As I struggled to change from my amniotic fluid-soaked sundress into Jake's tee-shirt, I listened to him begging me to let him help me.

"... for our son."

I know I don't have a choice, I have to accept his help or risk losing my child. I could feel my baby dropping, instead of 12 hours of labor, he'll be here in maybe an hour or less. Before I could answer, another contraction hit. I felt like I was being torn in two, as I screamed, Jake folded me into his arms and the pain subsided to a level I could breathe through. I panted in deep, even breaths until the contraction padded, crushing his hand in mine. I didn't want him touching me, because my fear keeps flashing me images of that night. Since I had escaped Elmhurst Hospital, I had not felt as vulnerable as I did that night, until now. It seemed that what Saul told me about mates and their bond was true, the pain would be bearable while he touched me because we would share it, and as much as I hated it, I needed him.

"Okay," I sobbed out after the contraction ended, "Okay, just... Just don't hurt us."

His arms tightened around me, and it almost felt like he kissed my hair as I leaned back against his broad chest, clinging to his arms. "I promise," he whispered, "I know you're scared. You have every right to be, to be angry, to hate me, but I didn't mean for what happened that night to happen. I will never hurt you again. I'm sorry I have to touch you, but it's the only way."

He sounded as hurt as I, but before I could look up at him, another contraction hit. This one wasn't as bad as the last, and as I panted, he murmured random soothing and encouraging things. We were doing it, we were having a baby together, me and my nightmare.