October 1798

It's chilly and damp outside. The glass windowpanes in the warm cabin are foggy, and I wipe them clear with my palm, gazing up at the gray sky, hoping the weather holds. I still have a few more chores to finish out in the fields, and the cow will need one last feeding before I set off for the day.

The smoke from the wood fire in the center of our modest cabin hangs thick and heavy in the air, filling my lungs as I work to get Ma's meal ready. I check the bread one last time while listing the rest of the tasks I have to complete in my head. I'm supposed to go to my best friend Charlotte's house this evening. Normally I wouldn't leave Ma alone, but Charlotte's family is throwing a party for some folks who've just arrived in town, and parties at the Allston's are legendary around here. Of course, I have a lot to accomplish before I can even think of heading out, and I better hurry otherwise Charlotte will be furious with me if I don't get there on time.

Ma's rocking chair creaks against the floorboards, and I steal a glance over at her, watching as she lethargically rocks back and forth, her head drooping to one side. She wears a blank expression on her once-pretty face, and her bonnet lays askew on top of her matted blond hair. She hasn't been well for a while now, not since that horrible fight she had with Pa a couple months ago.

They didn't think I heard them, but I was just outside, and they were ferocious. Ma accused Pa of deceiving her, of knowing I wasn't their daughter this whole time. This information stunned me. It was the first I'd ever heard of it, but it was like everything suddenly made sense. Ma was sobbing hysterically, wailing like something inside her was broken real bad, and she kept demanding that Pa tell her what had happened to her real daughter. She kept accusing him of knowing, and wouldn't stop screaming, not even when he started to hit her.

I never asked either of them about it. I suppose I couldn't even if I wanted to now. Ma hasn't been right ever since, and Pa... I scowl at the very thought of him, turning back around and pulling the bread from the fire. He's worse than ever.

The cabin door swings open, and the suddenness of it, makes me jump. My fingers brush against the hot metal pan, and the bread tumbles from my hands.

Horrified, I gape over at Pa, standing in the doorway. His bushy eyebrows knit together, and I instantly fall to my hands and knees, doing my best to salvage what I can of the bread. I ignore the dull pain throbbing in my fingers as the apologies spew from my lips, but Pa lifts his hand, and with one gesture silences me.

"Happy birthday, Ellie."

This the first time he's ever wished me a happy birthday, and it's also the first time he's spoken to me since the fight he had with Ma. In fact, I reckon it might just be about the kindest thing he has ever said to me in all my years, and because of that reason alone, my spine tingles with suspicion.

"Thank you," I reply, unnerved by this seemingly friendly father-daughter exchange.

He walks into the cabin, taking off his cap, and exposing his thinning blond hair. Pulling out a wooden stool from the table, he sits down. It's odd to see him here—a man out of place in his own home, but then again, he's never been much of a family man, and since that fight with Ma, he's around even less. Judging by the disheveled state of him, he's also been drinking more.

Pa shifts his weight and places his cap on the table he made with his own hands years ago. "Now, girl, ya know things ain't been going good 'round here for some time now."

I pull myself up, holding the pieces of salvaged bread, and nodding even though my intuition is screaming at me not to. Whatever he's about to say, I know it isn't going to be good. It never is with him.

"Well," he rubs the back of his neck, and stares down at the table. "It seems that the property's gone and got some debt on it, and try as I might, I can't seem to find myself a way out of it."

"What do you mean debt?" The blood in my veins runs cold. I knew things were bad, but I never imagined...

"Mr. Higgins from the bank has offered a solution."

"At what cost?"

Pa's eyes snap up to mine and I know I've spoken out of turn. "All of it!" he growls. "Higgins wants it all! The property, the house, everything, Goddammit!"

I glare over at him. Everything I've worked so hard to keep together; he's gone and destroyed. I know I'm dangerously close to pushing him over the edge, and I should keep my mouth shut, but what's the worse he could do? He's hit me for a lot less before, at least this would be worth it.

"And what are we supposed to do?" I demand.

Glowering at me for a moment, he begins to shake his head. "We?" A cruel laugh escapes him. "There ain't no we anymore."

"Wh-what do you mean?"

Leaning back, he folds his arms across his chest and stares me down. "I mean, I've made arrangements for your Ma and me."

"I don't understand..."

"You heard me! But don't you fret. I know you're my daugh—"

He corrects himself.

"My responsibility, and you're a fine enough girl. I'm sure I'll find you a suitable match."

"A hus-band?" I almost choke on the word, and Pa cackles.

"You're getting older, Ellie. You need to start a family of your own now. Besides, we're expected off the land by spring."

He picks up his cap, and pushes the stool back, standing up from the table. "I'm sure there's bound to be some lad that would want ya before then."

He walks over to the door but I don't move.

"What about Ma?" I ask in complete horror, and Pa looks at her for the first time.

He glances over to the corner where she stares out the window, rocking in her chair, like she's someplace else. Dipping his head, he turns back to me, but doesn't meet my eyes. "Your Ma don't know much of anything anymore."

It's the first time he's acknowledged her condition, and I note the remorse in his voice, but still he opens the door to leave.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles, and it sounds as though he means it, but it doesn't change anything. It's too late for apologies.

Hunching his shoulders up to his ears, he walks out of the cabin, closing the door behind him and leaving me there. I release the bread I'm still holding, and it goes falling to the floor. A minute later I join it, dropping to my knees and letting out an unbelieving sob.

Tears blur my vision and I wrap my arms around me, rocking back and forth. This can't be happening, not when I've worked so hard to keep everything together. I try to catch my breath, but it's difficult when all I can picture is a future chosen for me by Pa.

I manage to pull myself together enough to somehow get the rest of my chores done, even though I'm distracted. After making sure Ma's set for the night, I start out to Charlotte's house, hiking down the dusty road towards town, craving the comfort of my best friend.

Some birthday this is turning out to be. In the matter of just a few hours my whole world has gone and fallen apart. Of course, I knew when I turned seventeen that marriage would become a possibility, but until earlier today I was naive enough to think I'd actually have some say in the matter, or maybe even be matched with someone I could grow to love. But that won't be happening now, not with Pa in charge of my fate.

By the time I get to Charlotte's, I'm hot, sweaty, and thoroughly frustrated. I walk through the gates and onto the stately property, kicking up dust clouds behind me as I make my way to the main house. I keep trying to think how I'm going to explain all this to her. My best friend and I come from two very different worlds. In fact, I believe I was the subject of one of the very first fights between Charlotte and her mother. We were seven, and Charlotte had invited me over to play. Alma Aberson wasn't too pleased that her daughter had chosen the poor Blackwell girl to befriend, but even at that age Charlotte was stubborn enough to get her way.

I hold back my tears and put on a brave face as I head up the grand staircase to the large front door. In a matter of seconds after I knock, the butler is already ushering me inside. The house is bustling with activity, and I watch in amazement as servants rush around, preparing for tonight's festivities. By the look of things, Charlotte's mother is planning for this evening to be another event that has the whole town talking.

The butler escorts me into the drawing room and invites me to have a seat while he goes and fetches Charlotte, but I can't bring myself to sit on the pristine cream-colored settee, not when I'm covered with grime from the journey over here; so I pace the polished floors instead, wringing my hands together, and fretting over my situation.

When the door finally opens again, I breathe out in relief when Charlotte enters.

"Ellie! Happy birthday!" She steps into the room, looking lovely in a long, peach gown with her brown locks pinned primly on top of her head, but she stops short when she takes in my expression.

"What's happened?" she demands, and for a moment I'm too overwhelmed to even speak. I just shake my head.

Charlotte rushes to me. She takes my hand, leading me over to the settee, and sitting both of us down.

"Tell me," she urges.

I drop my eyes in shame, but manage to hold back my tears as I recount my run-in with Pa. Charlotte stays silent during the entire story, her face relaying the utter disbelief she's feeling as I tell her about the debts on the farm, and Mr. Higgins' offer. When I get to the part about how Pa told me I'd have to be married by spring, she finally can't keep silent any longer.

"You're joking!" she exclaims, her green eyes searching my face. "Ellie, you can't let your Pa choose who you're going to marry." She begins to shake her head. "We cannot let that happen."

Feeling overwhelmed by my lack of options, I sink back into the settee in defeat. "I don't think I have much choice."

But my best friend disregards my pessimism. She wraps her arm around my shoulder, and pulls me towards her. "I promise you: we won't let that happen."

I sniffle against her chest, taking comfort in her conviction and trying to claim some of it as my own, but the truth is Charlotte's always been a lot braver than me.

"We could always speak with Daniel..."

I can almost hear the wheels spinning in her head, and pull back. "Absolutely not!"

"Why not? You how fond my brother is of you. I always assumed that someday you two—"

"Charlotte! This is marriage we're talking about, and you know perfectly well that Daniel and I don't feel that way about each other!"

"But he'd do anything for you."

"Not that! Besides, I would never ask him to, and it's not like your mother would ever allow it."

"Mother!" Charlotte groans. "Daniel is a grown man, Ellie. He may do as he pleases, and if I know him at all, he'll want to help you. Besides, mother loves him much more than she despises you. If he tells her he wants you for his wife, she'll end up bending to his wishes. I can almost guarantee it."

She sounds bitter, the jealousy in her voice evident, but I don't address it. Charlotte has always been at odds with her mother, and it's understandable. The two of them couldn't be more different. Alma Aberson is reserved and calculating, while Charlotte proudly wears her heart on her sleeve. Because of these core differences, Alma makes no qualms about favoring Daniel, and often uses any opportunity she can to find fault in Charlotte.

"I'm not marrying your brother," I repeat. "Daniel would make a fine husband to someone. Just because I don't have the luxury of choosing someone I love, doesn't mean he shouldn't."

"Fine," Charlotte acquiesces, "but don't dismiss the idea entirely. Daniel might be your only option unless we get to work."

"Work?"

She demurely bats her eyelashes. "Why the art of seduction, my dear. There are going to be heaps of eligible bachelors here tonight, and if you're not going to marry Daniel, we need to find you a suitable husband before your Pa attempts to."

Charlotte tips her head to the side, and taps her chin, studying me with a critical eye. "And if we only have until spring, we're definitely going to need to get started right away."