Title - The Gathering: Bloodmourne Chronicles

Author - JRShepherd

Reviewer - awritingmess

Chapters reviewed - 13

Review:

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FIRST IMPRESSIONS:

After reading the prologue, my first thought was: "I'm not going to find anything to criticise here, am I?" And to an extent, your book definitely lived up to my expectations. Though there are some faults, that I'll point out later, your book is pretty perfect based on Wattpad standards, and I'm surprised you're not striving for a publishing deal.

The cover, blurb, and prologue are all intriguing. My one concern would be that the blurb, though good, either tells a little too much about the story or sets up expectations of a more suspenseful start. I can't tell which. Going in, I was expecting to dive straight into an adventurous beginning with a fast-paced plot. This wasn't the case. I personally thoroughly enjoyed the beginning, but I think it might be a bit misleading. Obviously I've only read a few chapters, so I can't judge just yet, but it does feel like it's taking a while to get to the exciting bits you mentioned in the blurb, this might put some readers off.

GRAMMAR:

All in all, pretty good. There are a few slip-ups like random capitalisation, extra spaces, and extra or too little punctuation, but these can all be fixed with a simple edit. It's really hard to pick out small mistakes with a naked eye, so I'd suggest running the document through Grammarly or google docs one last time.

WRITING STYLE:

Yet again, very impressed. Your style is unique and consistent. I'm not a professional in any way, so all I can do is give the perspective of the YA target audience, and in this circumstance, it's near faultless.

From what I've read, you have a simplistic, straight-to-the-point, and yet somehow beautiful way of writing. Your descriptions, though full of stunning imagery and language, never sound too flowery or wordy. The kind of writing that entices a reader in and doesn't let them go until it's over.

There were a few times I felt a bit lost, especially in more action-packed scenes, maybe because things were under-described to keep up the pace. I know it's important to not bog down fight scenes with description, but sometimes it felt like things were moving too fast. This might just be me and my slow brain though.

CHARACTERISATION AND DEVELOPMENT:

I don't think I've ever related to a character more than Aticus. Okay, that might be a slight exaggeration, but he's up there in the top ten. I don't know how, but you managed to sum up every emotion of being a teenager lost in today's society into one character and I loved it. And this is coming from a person who usually prefers the more morally-grey/evil characters - so you obviously did something right.

Most of the other characters were also likeable, each with their own motivations and personalities. I liked the diversity of the cast, though I personally would've liked to see more female main characters, especially as it's quite uncommon in high fantasy, but I'm only partway in so I can't complain just yet.

The only thing that did put me off a little was the extremely large cast. There were a lot of characters to keep track of, which got confusing in places, and it did take me out of the story as more and more were introduced. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, I just thought I needed to point it out. Like I said before, I'm only partway into a series, so there's still plenty of development to go, and I'm looking forward to getting to know each of them!

The interactions between the characters were also done well. All of your characters have distinct voices and ways of speaking, which again, I loved. I thoroughly enjoyed the conflict/bickering between Aticus and Aeotus, it added a new dimension and more natural feel to the chemistry between the main characters. I'm always a sucker for the enemies to friends/lovers trope, so I'm really hoping I get to see their casual hatred blossom into a loyal friendship. You've got me hooked.

PLOT:

I can't quite pinpoint what story structure you used to plot, but it's working. The start was a bit slow, but as the novel's progressing and picking up steam your amazing writing is becoming much clearer. So good job!

The separate characters all coming together as the story moves forward is really intriguing, like pieces of a puzzle fitting together to embark on an exciting and life-changing adventure. Obviously, this has been done before and it's common in fantasy novels, but tropes are tropes for a reason, right? And I think you did a good job of making it original and unique enough for that not to matter. Tolkien would be impressed too, I'm sure.

CONCLUSION:

Overall, a very good book, and I genuinely can't wait to read more. If you're a fan of high fantasy, you won't be disappointed. And good luck for the future, I'm looking forward to seeing your name in book stores someday!

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