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Chapter 35: Noobmaster69

Rocket, (Y/N) and Banner walked up a hill and knocked on the door of Thor's house. When no one answered, Rocket pushed the door open as a loud creak echoed slightly. 

"What the...?" Rocket observed the dusty house. "Whew! Something died in here." 

"Hello? Thor!" Banner called out. (Y/N) kept her wings close to her body as she walked through the cramp hallway. 

"Are you here about the cable?" A voice asked from behind them. "The Cinemax went out two weeks ago... and the sports were all kinda fuzzy and whatnot." 

"Thor?" Banner gasped as Thor slowly stood up from grabbing a beer to reveal that after the last 5 years, he'd developed a beer belly. Thor turned to them and cheered. 

"Boys!" He laughed. "Oh my god! Oh my god, it's so good to see you!" He yelled as he gave Banner a hug. He then faced Rocket. "And you-! Come here, cuddly little rascal!" He laughed as he leaned Rocket's head on his stomach as he ruffled his fur. 

"Yeah, no, I'm good, I'm good! That- That's not necessary!" Rocket complained. Thor let go and noticed (Y/N). 

"And you! (Y/N)? The winged lady! Rocket's girlfriend, how are you?" He asked as he stumbled over to give her a hug as well. "It's great to see you!" (Y/N) said as she hesitantly but happily hugged back. 

"It's good to see you too, Thor." She laughed and patted his back. 

"Hulk! You know my friends, Miek and Korg, right?" Thor asked the tall green scientist. 

"Hey, boys!" Korg greeted. 

"Hey, guys." Bruce waved back. "Long time no see." 

"Beer's in the bucket. Feel free to log into the wifi. No password, obviously." Korg insisted before he sat up straight. "Thor, he's back." He said as he pointed to the television, which he was playing Fortnite on. "That kid on the TV just called me a dickhead again." Miek threw something at the TV in anger, which wasn't a great throw. 

"Noobmaster." Thor growled. 

"Yeah, Noodmaster69, called me a dickhead." Korg spat. 

"I'm sick of this." Thor mentioned as he took Korg's headphones from him and spoke into the microphone. "Noobmaster, hey, it's Thor again. You know, the God of Thunder? Listen, bud, if you don't log off this game immediately, I am going to fly over to your house, come down to that basement you're hiding in, rip off your arms, and shove them up your butt! ...Oh, that's right, yes, go cry to your father, you little weasel!" 

"Thank you, Thor." Korg took the headphones back. 

"Let me know if he bothers you again, okay?" Thor insisted. 

"Thank you very much. I will." Korg nodded. Thor faced back to the three visitors. 

"So, you guys want a drink? What are we drinking? I've got beer, tequila, all sorts of things." Thor offered as he used his large axe to take the cap off another beer bottle, he sculled in gratefully. 

"Buddy." Banner placed a hand on Thor's shoulder. "You all right?" He asked. 

"Yes, I'm fine! Why? Why, don't I look all right?" Thor stuttered. 

"You look like melted ice cream." Rocket replied from his position next to (Y/N). (Y/N) rolled her eyes at her Rocket's unnecessary comment. Although, Thor only laughed at his insult. 

"So, what's up? You just here for a hang, or what?" 

"We need your help. There might be a chance we could fix everything." Banner explained. 

"What, like the cable? 'Cause that's been driving me bananas for weeks." Thor burped. 

"Like Thanos." Banner added. Thor froze. His smile faded and his eyes dimmed before he hesitantly faced the taller being. He grabbed Banner's shirt and spoke close to a cry. 

"Don't... say that name." His voice cracked. 

"Um, yeah, we don't actually say that name in here." Korg added as he took his headphones off. Banner's eyes stayed on Thor as he tried to release Thor's grip. 

"Please take your hand off me." He asked before Thor let go off his grip. "Now, I know that... guy, might scare you." 

"Why would I be-" Thor scoffed and laughed. "Why would I be scared of that guy? I'm the one who killed that guy, remember? Anyone else here kill that guy? ...Nope. Didn't think so. Korg, why don't you, uh, tell everybody who chopped Thanos' big head off?" 

"Um, Stormbreaker?" Korg asked. 

"Who was swinging Stormbreaker?" Thor asked, a little annoyed. He took another sip of beer. 

"I get it. You're in a rough spot, okay? I've been there myself." Banner assured. "And you want to know who helped me out of it?" 

"I don't know... was it, uh, Natasha?" Thor slurred. 

"It was you." Banner answered. "You helped me." 

"So, why don't you ask the Asgardians down there, how much my help is worth?" Thor suggested as he sat himself in a chair next to a window. "The ones that are left, anyway." 

"I think we could bring them back." 

"Stop. Stop, okay? I know you think I'm down here wallowing in my own self-pity, waiting to be rescued and saved, but I'm fine, okay? We're fine, aren't we?" He gestured to Korg and Miek. 

"Oh, we're good here, mate." Korg smiled. 

"So, whatever it is that you're offering, we're not into it. Don't care. Couldn't care less. Goodbye." Thor chuckled as he took a bite of what seemed like chocolate. 

"We need you, pal." Banner protested. Thor shook his head and looked at his now empty beer bottle. 

"There's beer on the ship." Rocket offered. Thor threw his bottle down and looked to Rocket. 

"What kind?" He asked. 


A/N 

Wasn't much of (Y/N) in this chapter but there'll be more Rocket X (Y/N) moments in the future ;) 

- Chalupa 

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