II

Every time when everything feels so heavy, where do people go? When everything is tiring, when do people go to rest? When everything feels so scary, where do they go to feel safe?

That was the question running in my mind while walking on my way, where I, a freaking person who has a bad day, have a heavy heart, and a tired life, wanted to rest.

It was like fifteen or probably more than fifteen minutes walk papunta sa bahay namin; thankfully, my favorite place is not that far away naman. I smiled widely nang matanaw ko na ang tulay; I can see it now! I excitedly run like a happy kid papunta ron. I use stairs para makapunta sa mismong tulay.

When I reach the top, I can't help but to smile. Sumalubong kasi sakin ang fresh air, and the tweeting sounds of the birds make me feel like they are welcoming me. I can't help but to close my eyes and feel every cold air touch my skin. But my smile on my lips vanished. Still closing my eyes, I remembered why I was here. I am suffocated, I am tired, and life is tiring me. Can I just die? Those thoughts ang nagging dahilan lang nang sunod sunod na pagpatak ng luha ko.

"Can you just sit down, miss?"

I stopped when I heard an unfamiliar masculine voice. Dali-dai akong nagpunas ng luha, and thankfully my tears are madaling kausap. "Miss, I said sit down." Nakanguso akong humarap sa likod ko, then I saw a man wearing a dark blue shirt staring at me; his stares are intense na parang papatayin niya ako pag hindi pa ako sumunod. Inikot ko ang mata ko, and the only vacant space na meron ay yung nasa tabi niya. But because of his intense stares, para akong takot na kuting na umupo sa tabi niya. "Akala ko tatayo ka na lang don." Nahihiya akong umiling sa kanya, but still asking him what's the problem.

"Why?" I asked, pero nakita ko lang ang pagkunot ng noo niya at hindi na ko pinansin. I watched him close his eyes as I saw him wearing his airpods. Kaya napatahimik na lang din ako sa tabi, and all I could do is admire this place. We are now sitting on the bridge; sa baba ay makikita mo ang malinaw na dagat. It's not really that clear, but maaninag mo parin ang mga isdang naglalanguyan. I couldn't help but be amazed when I saw tons of fish swam looking like they were following their leaders.

"Look, oh, si nimoo!" Masaya kong turo sa katabi ko kasi I really saw a fish that looks like nimo, but when I look to my katabi, he's still busy closing his eyes. Nakita ko ngayon ang ulo niya ay nakasandal sa railings ng tulay. Thankfully, he's busy listening to his music, kasi nakakahiya ginawa ko. Ang feeling close ko naman kasi!

"Anong oras na?" Napakurap kurap ako nang marinig ang tanong nang katabi ko. I check my phone and show him the time. It's now four thirty in the afternoon, at malapit ng mag sunset! This is my favorite part, the sunset! Pero bakit wala pang masyadong tao? Madalas kapag pumupunta ako rito masasabi kong may sampong tao na nakatambay rito, pero ngayon kami lang ng katabi ko.

"Manonood ka rin ng sunset?" Masaya kong tanong sa kanya, but he just replied with a nod.

Like I always do every time I'm waiting for the sunset, para akong batang excited mabigyan ng candy ng mama niya. I look at the sky; kanina the sky is clear blue, but the clouds are so peaceful, tingnan, parang mga bulak na pinatagpi-tagpi. But now the sky slowly turns orange and yellow. Napangiti ako nang makita ang araw na parang unti-unting naglalaho. Everything is peaceful, everything feels nice, and my heart is finally breathing again. I can't help but smile widely again. I'm now ready for tomorrow.

"It was beautiful." Napatingin ako sa katabi ko, he's also watching and admiring the sunset. I stared at his side profile; I could see how his eyes softened while watching the beautiful view we had. Napangiti ako nang makita ang maliit na ngiti na kumurba sa labi niya. It seems like the world is quiet and all we heard was the sound of the flash of the sea as we were both watching the sunset, and I don't know why, but I suddenly looked at his eyes and said, Nakasalubong ko lang din ang mga mata niya. We supposed to stare at the sunset, right? Why are we now staring into each other's eyes? And why can't I deny that I'm mesmerizing to a stranger's eyes?

"Ashley Realonzo, with honors."

My thoughts are interrupted nang marinig ang pangalan ko sa stage, kagaad akong umakyat, then I bow my head a little. I pout while seeing pictures on the big screen; I can't help but bash myself! Pa big screen pa sila sarap pakyuhan kidding aside, today is our practice of graduation. Hindi ko nabilang yung araw since we are practicing, pero sobrang tagal na, I guess we have been practicing for one month na. It should be vacation, na eh!

"Milktea mamaya?" Napalingon ako sa mga kaklase when they invited me for milk tea, and as I usual, I declined. "Bukas na lang, pagod ako, I want to sleep pagkauwi." The five of them nodded at hinayaan na lang sa gusto ko. Sumasama naman pag hindi ako tinatamad, I'm not in the mood for socializing.

"Ayaw mo talaga milktea? Kasama crush mo?" Kaagad akong napalingon kay Cha, she gave me meaningful stares. Nakasimangot akong umiling sa kanila, desidido akong magpahinga, "ulol, kahit magsama-sama pa sampong crush ko-syempre sasama ako." Malandi akong ngumiti sa kanila dahilan para magtawanan kaming lahat, gosh mga baliw.

"Pero seryoso, I declined. Sakit mga katawan ko." My friend Cha just raised her middle finger to me dahilan para mapatawa ako, papakyuhan ko rin sana siya kaso nangangati talaga daliri ko ko kapag tinataas ko middle finger ko kaya inirapan ko na lang siya. "Siguraduhin mong matutulog ka pag-uwi mo ah!" Pahabol niya kaya naman tumango ako, matutulog talaga ako.

But then again I saw myself walking in the same direction. Saktong papunta ko ron, I saw him again in the same spot where I saw him yesterday. Nakapikit lang siya, and his head ay nakasandal lang sa may railing ng tuloy. Natatakot ako para sa kanya, baka naman mahulog 'to? Pero okay lang sasaluhin ko naman siya, kidding aside, but looking at his sleep face, I can definitely say na ang pogi pala niya.

I'm sitting now to his side quietly until the sunset wave says goodbye again. He's staring at the sunset with a peaceful look on his face. I can't help myself; instead of watching the sunset, I saw myself staring at his face. Hanggang sa hindi ko na namamalayan one week passed I'm still coming always to this place. I always found him in the same spot, closing his eyes, leaning his head against the railings with the same sadness emotion in his eyes, wearing his airpods, and then the same thing, he opened his eyes when sunset started. And I can't help myself to become addicted to watching sunsets-but watching sunsets in his peaceful eyes.

"Paupo ah," pagpapaalam ko at saka umupo sa tabi niya. Hindi siya kumibo at tanging kunot na noo lang ang binigay niya sakin kahit nakapikit siya, edi okayed. Nasanay na rin ako kay pogi, he's always quiet for past one week I came here. Nilibot ko na lang ang paningin ko sa paligid, I saw some fisherman na nanghuhili ng isda sa tabi. May mga bangka rin na nakakatali. How could I described this place? Alam ko lang pwedeng ipang describe sa kanya ang ganda niya.

Napatingin ako sa may kandungan niya nang may umilaw, it was his phone then may mga nag pop na message reason why his lock screen exposed. "Girlfriend mo 'yan?" Kuryosong tanong ko, his lock screen kasi picture niya at nang isang babae. "Ex," he answered, but I saw a glint of pain in his eyes.

"Ay, kaka break niyo lang 'no? Nasasaktan ka pa eh, tas tugtugan mo nung nagdaang araw yung sa kabilang buhay akala ko namatayan ka." Pag kokomento ko, nakita ko na napamulat siya ng mata at tinitigan lang ako, sunod non ay irap na ang nakuha ko. "Sungit ah, ganda ka ba teh?" Muli kong komento at binigyan naman siya ng mag asawang irap, nangigel pagkatao ko rito.

"Miss...." Nakasimangot ko siyang tingnan nang marinig ang mahihina niyang pagtawa na para bang isa akong clown a harap niya. "Parang baliw naman." Mahina kong sambit nakita ko lang siya na tumawa ulit, somehow his aura became light; hindi katulad nung mga nagdaang araw na parang pinagsakluban ng langit at lupa.

"Pero maiba ako, what happened?" Pagtatanong ko na kasi I'm feeling close, saka mahihiya pa ba siya kaming dalawa lang naman nandito rin, saka sa isang linggo hindi nga siya nahihiya sakin kapag nag dra-drama siya rito.

"A lot of misunderstandings and lack of time," he answered, but I can see how he's holding himself to be casual.

"Hmm, ilang taon din kami tas anim na buwan na nakakalipas nung naghiwalay kami. Tapos siguro mga isang buwan na nag uusap parin, then we decided to end there." Napangiwi na lang ako, saklap pala ng love life ni pogi.

"Kung ako na lang kasi sana," malandi kong komento nakita ko ang pagdaan ng gulat sa mukha niya ngunit napalitan nang mahinang tawa. Lakas ng loob lumandi pero dedma sa basher.

"But still, I miss her a lot." He smiled sadly, at sa Isang iglap natulala na lang siya. Maybe he's thinking about his ex. "Before ka mag relapse pogi, ano munang pangalan mo? Add kita sa Facebook; badly need ng fbf." Nakanguso kong wika habang ako ngayon ay nakatingin na sa cp ko, konti ng fbf ko! I heard his chuckle, then I saw him na sumilip sa phone ko. Nakakahiya Naman panira ako sa drama ni pogi.

"Gusto mo lang ata malaman pangalan ko." Napataas ang kilay ko sa sinabi niya, at muli kong narinig ang tawa niya. Ayos ah music to my ears ang tawa ni pogi. "Ulol, pero totoo." Walang pag aalinlangan kong sagot, nakita ko na naman ang gulat sa mukha niya, but then he slightly smiled at me.

"Let's watch the sunset first, miss." Napatingin ako sa harap ko nang makitang bumaba na pala ang araw, nalibang akong kulitin si pogi. Sa loob ng isang linggo ngayon lang ako nagkalakas ng loob kausapin siya, mukha lang makapal ang face ko, but I'm shy talking to him, especially when he's having a secret breakdown of his thoughts. He's not crying, naman, but you can see a lot of emotion in his eyes.

"Can I watch the sunset in your eyes?" I asked in a low voice. I'm already staring into his eyes, watching the reflection of the sun slowly vanish in the orange sky. Our eyes met; he didn't smile, but his eyes exclaimed softness and calmness. "I'm Ashley Realonzo," I introduced while being lost in his eyes.

"Hmm, I'm Jerome Fortel. It was nice knowing you, my sunset buddy. Isa pa pala...

"I'd also love to watch the sunset in your eyes."