I

When I was a kid, I was dreaming about being a princess, wearing a gown, wearing a crown, and of course I have make-up that makes me shine among all. And now I'm staring at my own reflection; I can't help but to smile. Isn't a dream come true? I just met my prince, the prince that really put a smile on my face.

"Ang ganda mo madam Ashley!"

I smiled when I heard the make-up artist compliment. I stared at my own reflection as my eyes sparked. "I am really beautiful," I whispered while looking at myself. I have a shade of pink in my eyelids; that fits perfectly with the theme. I also have blush that looks natural on my cheeks; she also put me eyelashes since I really don't have eyelashes to curl on, but it's nice on me naman. And my heavy upper lips have a pretty salmon pink color, lalong bumagay sa labi ko. I smiled in the mirror. I'm ready for this day.

My forehead creased when I saw a man reflection walking towards me. Naksimangot akong tiningnan siyang papalapit sakin. I saw a smile on his face when he stopped beside me as I felt his warm arms on my shoulder. My prince is here.

"Love, you're so gorgeous." Imbis ngumiti lalo ko lang siyang sinimangutan. I heard his manly chuckle to my ears. "Khev naman eh, bawal ka kaya rito!" Inis kong sabi, but I just received his warm hug. "Sorry, love, I can't help it. Masama bang makita yung mapapangasawa ko?" He used his soft voice while looking at me. Hindi ko maiwasang matunaw kaya niyakap ko na lang din siya pabalik.

Bumitaw siya sa pagkakayakap sakin, he just stared at me, "asawa ko." His eyes sparkled when he heard that word, "please don't call me that, Khev." I saw how the spark in his eyes faded but continued smilling at me.

"Why can't I call you in different call signs, love?" Napakunot ang noo ko, when he suddenly knows how to ask questions? I mean, he never asked questions before. Mahina na lang akong tumawa, then answer his question, "I want to stick in one call sign, love, saka ayaw mo ba ng love? Like love natin isa't-isa diba?" My face was satisfied when I saw him smile again brightly.

"You think I'm beautiful today, love" Pag iiba ko ng usapan, so I ask him; he stared at my face and smiled at me. "Yes, you are; I can't wait to see you walking in the aisle with your wedding gown later, love. Parang iiyak ata ako mamaya." Nginitian ko lang siya and let him hold my hand; maybe iiyak din ako mamaya? Everything seems so fast, and now I'm marrying this man.

"My Mrs. Ronze..." He whispered, but my heart doesn't beat naman faster, kaya nginitian ko na lang siya, this man talaga.

"Hoy lalaki, bawal ka rito!"

Nakita ko ang pag simangot ni Khev, and he's hiding at my back, "Love, kanina pa niya ako binabantayan. Buti nakatakas ako kanina para makita ka, kaso nahuli na naman ako." Pagsusumbong niya dahilan para mapatawa ako, as I saw my best friend running towards us at hinila si Khev nang walang kahirap-hirap palabas. Tingnan ko lang siya na i-lock ang pinto, at nakapa mewang na humarap sakin.

"Pag yung kasal niyo hindi natuloy ewan ko sainyo." Inirapan ko na lang siya, as if naman totoo yung pamahiin na bawal makita nung lalaki yung babae before ng kasal. Duh dalawang oras na lang ikakasal na kami, I don't think anything can stop us now.

"Daming alam Nikki, samahan mo ko mag bibihis na ako." I saw her rolling her eyes, then sinamaan ako sa fitting room. My eyes sparked with happiness when I saw my wedding gown; it was a v-shape sa harap, probably exposing my cleavage mamaya. And it has a royal length wedding gown; it is actually really pretty, and I love it. "Baliw ka siguro? Bakit hindi ikaw ang namili ng wedding gown mo? Akala ko ba excited kang ikasal? Saka pinaiba mo pa yung theme? Parang baliw pinapahirapan mo ko! Akala ko purple and blue ang gusto mo? Bakit naging pink!" Pagrereklamo ni Nikki nang makita ang wedding gown ko, sa kanya ko kasi inutos ang pag pili ng gowns and other stuff, and it was nice naman na sa kanya ko pinagawa since everything looks perfect. And about the theme, I just don't want to use those colors."Para surprise duhh, and hindi ko lang feel yung purple and blue," I answer, but I just received a meaningful stare.

"Ashley, I've been your friend for decades now, right?" I just nod my head; we've been friends since senior high, kaya nga siguro for decades na rin kaming magkaibigan. "Tapos anong meron?" Walang gana kong patanong pabalik, nakita ko ang pag singhal niya.

"Sigurado ka ba sa kasal na 'to?" Walang alinlangan akong tumango, "yes." I'm happy na ikakasal na ako, I'm happy that I'm marrying Khev. We've been together for two years, and he's always there for me when I was on the edge of falling apart. He saves me always, and for us being two years together, he's not doing anything but making me comfortable.

"Sige sabi mo eh, pero don't you think it's too fast? Dalawang taon palang kayo, and you agree to this marriage. Hindi naman sa ano ah, pero are you already move on?" I squeeze my eyes shut, then open them and let a heavy sigh answer her question. "Ashley, are you sure about Khev? I know you always said you feel comfortable around him. But I think it's the other way around; it's like you just seeing someone to him, you know." She still continued bluffing about things I didn't want to hear. I glared at her, which made her shut her mouth.

"Stop. I will not talk about this; it's been three years," I replied, but Ishe just rolled her eyes. If she's not my friend, I will probably not invite her to my wedding.

"Geh ulit sabi mo eh, siguruhin mong hindi ka aatras mamaya ah, kakahihiyan yan." I just smile at her, as if aatras ako. I look at my reflection again when I already wore my wedding gown; it's really suit me talaga. Just like I expected, I saw my cleavage, and it's not nakakailang naman. I smile brightest looking at myself. How can I leave Khev at our wedding if I feel so much happiness like this? I'm really determined to marry him. I stop checking myself when I see someone's behind me; it's the brother of Khev-kuya Seb.

"Tara na, everyone is waiting for you, Mrs. Ronze." Nahihiya akong sumunod kay kuya samantalang si Nikki ay nasa likod ko tumataas ang gown ko para hindi madumihan. I couldn't help but be amazed when I saw a limousine.

"The heck? Yaman naman ni Khev." Mahinang bulong ni Nikki dahilan para napatawa ako. I don't really care if I will ride a limousine papunta sa wedding, but when I sit down inside, it's nice and comfortable, naman. It's fifteen minutes drive to arrive at the church, and I can't help but feel anxious. I feel like anxiety is eating me.

"Nikki kinakabahan ako!" Pagrereklamo ko pero tumawa lang siya ng malakas at sinabing ngayon pa raw ako kinabahan. My body became tensed nang makitang malapit na kami, and as the blink of an eye, I'm already in the close door of the church. I inhaled and exhaled, then binaba ko na ang bello ko. I also have a bouquet of pink flowers in my hands. And I can't help but feel more tensed when the door finally opens.

Heart beats fast

Colors and promises

I smiled when I heard the song played; it was a thousand years, but I couldn't help but smile bitterly and be happy at the same time. I continue walking slowly, but bowing my head and looking at my heels. I don't want to see him muna. I'm shy pa.

How to be brave

How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?

But watching you stand alone

All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow.

Mahina akong napakagat sa labi ko, I'm afraid to fall; falling in love is what I'm always afraid of. But Khev, I know he tried his best to make me believe in love again. Right, Khev has made me believe in love again. As I finally had the strength to look in front of me, I saw Khev waiting for me. I saw a smile on his face and how his eyes filled with tears. I can't help but to smile back, enjoying every moment I step in.

One step closer

As I look at Khev once again, it's like the world suddenly became slow, like letting me enjoy every moment. But I stopped when I saw someone beside him; our eyes locked. My smile faded as I saw him again. I feel a hard bang in my chest; all I know is I'm in pain right now...

I have died every day waiting for you.

Darling, don't be afraid. I have loved you.

I tried to step my feet to walk again, but when the chorus hit, I stopped in the middle of the aisle. I just stared at him; he's not smiling, but I can see how he was fighting back his tear. It's been three years; why did I see him again? He stares at me just like he stared at me before; it was full of gentleness and softness. His stare was telling me something. All I could do was laugh in a low voice. I'm at this moment again. I'm being insane and crazy because of this man...

For a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more

All I know is I'm doomed once again; the bouquet I'm holding is now on the floor. Lock in his eyes. I feel the hot tears filling my eyes as the memories flash again when my tears fall one by one.