Chapter 16.

October 1939
Amsterdam, Holland

The day was cloudy, rainy and windy. Even though Ruth was wearing gloves she still dug her hands deeply into her pockets in an attempt to keep them warm. The building where Susi's flat was situated was not far from the bus station but in this weather it seemed to be blocks and blocks away.

There was a lot on her mind. Just last month Germany had invaded Poland, causing France and England to declare war on Germany. In Holland of course everyone followed the war news and talked non stop about it, but few were concerned about the war coming to them. Holland's neutrality would be respected, just as it had been during the Great War.

Ruth, however, had reason to worry. Erik was still in Germany. What's more, there had been no word from him in all this time.

She tried to comfort herself that in this new state of war the post was slower than usual. Or maybe his Grandmother had taken a serious turn for the worse and required all his time and attention.

"He'll write, he'll write soon." She kept repeating to herself over and over again.

At last she was home. There was a delicious aroma coming from the kitchen. Susi was home and from the smell of it was baking.

"Ruth, is that you?" Susi's voice called out.

"Yes. What are you cooking? It smells so good."

Susi came from the kitchen holding an envelope in her hand. "A letter arrived for you from Germany."

For some reason a chill went down Ruth's spine as she looked at the letter Susi held out. Of course the letter was from Erik. There was no one else in Germany who could write her a letter. She should be glad. At long last he had written. Usually when the letters would come Ruth would pounce on them, hardly able to contain her excitement. Now she stood frozen, staring at it, unable to reach out.

"Susi," she whispered at last. "Could you...could you open it for me?"

Her cousin had a look of sympathy on her face. She tore open the envelope and handed the folded paper to Ruth.

Ruth's hands shook as she took the letter and unfolded it.

October 2nd, 1939
My dear Ruth,
I hardly know where to begin this letter. By the time it reaches you I will already be on the front lines.

Ruth folded the paper abruptly. She lifted her eyes and they locked with Susi's.

"What is it?" Susi gently prodded. Ruth swallowed deeply, trying to control herself. She must have read wrong. Surely she had read wrong. Haltingly she extended the letter to Susi.

"Could you read it to me, Susi?"
"But Ruth is a private letter, I don't think it would be proper..."

"Please Susi, I can't...I just don't have the strength, the courage to read it on my own."

Susi took a deep breath and relented. She took the letter from Ruth, opened it and began reading.

My dear Ruth,
I hardly know where to begin this letter. By the time it reaches you I will already be at the front lines. You know of course by now that Germany has gone to war. They are drafting men into the army. My father is high in the military ranks, because of this I have been one the first to be conscripted.

This past month I have been in training and now we are deemed ready to be sent out. The train will take us tomorrow. I just hope I'll be able to get this letter sent before we go.

I don't know how long this war will last or how far reaching the effects will be.
Ruth, if it comes to you, please, I beg you, be careful. You know the Germans have little love for Jews. If you have to hide then hide. If you have to run away then run away. Don't worry about me. I'll find you. No matter what happens, no matter where you end up, even if it's in the very depths of the earth, I promise that I'll find you. They can't keep us separate forever. No matter where you have go I'll follow you there.

Keep me in your heart and remember that you are always in mine. No matter where I go, no matter where I end up, you will always be with me.

I love you. I will always love you.
Yours, and only yours,
Erik.

Ruth's put her hand to her mouth to try and keep the cry of dismay from coming out. Tears filled her eyes as she sank to the floor. This couldn't be true. It just couldn't be true. Susi gently knelt down and put her arms around her. Ruth sobbed into her cousin's shoulder.

"What if he's killed, Susi? What if he never comes back?"

"He'll come back," Susi whispered back in an attempt to comfort. "He promised that no matter what he'll come back. Just wait for him, Ruth, hold on to his promise and wait for him."