Word Count: 2113

-Mature Content Warning!!-

~Kiva

Peeking around the doorway into the infirmary, I see Ark laying in the furthest bed.

A smile touches my lips. He's alive. I knew he would be. And he's laying in bed, a rare sight for such a strong, healthy man.

As I approach, I wince, noting the intensity of his wounds.

"You look terrible," I observe, my attention grazing over him, over the white bandages wound around his limbs.

He laughs breathily. "Thanks, Kiva."

The wounds on his face are the most offensive to look at. A large, deep indigo bruise spreads over his right eye and cheek, accompanied by some minor scratches.

They didn't hold back with him. Like they didn't hold back with Andri.

"How are you feeling?" I ask uncomfortably. I don't know how he responds to kindness, since I'm so brash with him all the time.

"Better than I deserve. I can't believe they bested me," he mutters, frowning deeply.

"There were eight of them, all armed apparently. Nobody could have fought them off," I assure him. Were anyone able to, it would be him, but he wasn't armed and no one could have predicted this tonight.

Ark stares at me. "I was worried they got to you..."

I clear my throat, tilting from foot to foot. This isn't simple to say.

"One of them did."

Ark stills, a frown deepening between his brows. I watch him straighten, as if the information hasn't properly registered.

"Did they hurt you?" His gaze roves over my exposed skin, checking for anywhere I may be favouring.

"No, I'm fine. He wanted to take me with him, but he got interrupted," I explain, shuddering at the thought.

What would have happened had I succumbed to the mate bond and went with him? I haven't been able to stop thinking about it...

Which is why, tonight, I have plans to sneak out and meet this strange mate of mine.

I'm going to regret it. There is a chance he may kill me, or kidnap me, but I have to take the risk, otherwise I will never rest. And a life of torment wondering who my mate is and what could have happened had I met him is not one I want to resign myself to.

"Did he say anything?" Ark pushes.

"Not a word." At least that is the truth.

Ark releases a long breath from his nose, casting a glance out the far infirmary window, where it snows softly over the woodland area that flanks the manor.

"So they want you alive. That's good to know," he murmurs, although he doesn't sound happy about either option.

I wrap my arms around myself, even though it isn't cold in here. "I can't imagine what they would do to me if they did get a hold of me. I'd rather be killed."

"That won't happen." A cold, firm promise.

Ark isn't going to allow himself to be bested by intruders again. For once, I feel safe here. And tonight, I'm going to throw all of that away for some thrill and excitement.

I look over him, chewing on my nails. "Can't believe I hoped you had lived. I should be wanting you dead."

"Coming to like me, huh?" He gives me the barest smile. It's the first I've seen of it, and when it's genuine like this, it lights his eyes up.

I push at his shoulder, careful of where he is seriously wounded. "No way. I still hate you."

Maybe I don't hate Ark, but he still isn't easy to like. Maybe I will go back to thinking such strong hatred for him when I'm lying against the floor of the gym, cursing his relentless training techniques.

"Whatever you say, Kiva."

"Who is going to be my guard now?" I ask. If Jack returns, it means more frolicking around the manor at late hours, considering his tendency to sleep on the job.

Ark sits up a little more, wincing as he does so.

"Me still. Just give me a couple days," he mutters, resting his hand against his ribs. I don't even want to ask how many are broken.

They could have killed him...I wish I knew why they didn't.

"I get a nose bleed and I get a week off. You get beaten to near death, and you get a couple days?" I would marvel at his resilience, but at this point it's probably just his stubbornness.

He shrugs, eyes glazing over. "It's my job."

I stare at his face, as he looks out the window. There is something in me that wants to dig into that cold façade, to learn about what influenced him.

But what business is it of mine? What I have a right to know is what he wants to tell me.

I don't bother Ark for the rest of the day, having been ushered out by the fussy nurse. It's for the best anyway. I'm worried my guilt will spill over and I'll admit to him my plans for the night.

The afternoon drags on painfully slow.

Most of it I spend pacing back and forth through my room, staring out the window and into the nearby forest. The sky eventually deepens as night sweeps over the territory.

Father allows me to eat dinner in my room, considering most of the downstairs has been trashed by the intruders.

They only just got Ark's blood off the floor in the main foyer this afternoon...

I wait until midnight, before I put on my thickest coat, socks and boats before sneaking past a slumbering Jack outside my bedroom door.

Fear and excitement mingle within me as I keep my footsteps light, slinking out the back way.

Part of me thinks Ark is going to be there to intercept me, but of course, he is in the infirmary, barely able to walk.

If this goes bad, no one is going to save me but myself.

The snow is thick tonight, seeping a lot of my energy as I sludge through it toward the forest line. I can hear the river faintly in the distance, which Ark made me cross.

Will that save me tonight?

I shake the thought from my head. He's my mate, he would have killed me had he wanted to. My only fear now is that he will grab me in the darkness and I'll be thrust into his world with no escape.

I keep walking, until the sight of someone leaning against a tree in the distance has me hesitating.

My breath clouds in front of me as I stare them down.

It's him.

He wears his usual hood and dark clothing, indicating no intention of revealing his identity, at least until he knows we are alone, and my personal guard didn't trail me.

"This is such a bad idea," I mutter to myself.

Regardless, I trek toward him, winding through the trees, ignoring the bitter cold as it hangs around me.

There is no one else around, by the looks of it. It's dark though, but it appears that if he wants to kidnap me, he is going to do it himself, and for once, I think I may be able to stop him, if it turns to it.

"You came..." I stop a few feet away from him.

Too close, and he could grab me before I can get a chance to respond. And from here, I can monitor him all I like.

He nods.

"You have to talk to me. We are mates, it's only fair you see me, and get to see you," I tell him, gesturing between us.

He doesn't make a move, although I can feel the intensity of his gaze. And not a single sound leaves his mouth.

I sigh, feeling frustration start to gather inside of me.

Throwing my hands up, I shake my head. "This isn't fair...My mate wants me dead."

He straightens, advancing on me with slow steps. He is showing me he isn't a threat, I realise, not stopping until the tips of his boots almost touch mine.

With heart-breaking gentleness, he takes my hands in his, squeezing them tightly.

My breath catches in my throat, and for a moment I don't move, worried I'll break the spell. I still can't see under his hood, with all the darkness, and I wish like nothing else that I could...

"Take off your mask and we can run away together. You are my mate, you can just step away from this life, and we can make a new one, elsewhere," I whisper.

I don't care who he is. I don't care about his past, what his intentions were that night he broke in.

Right now, here, he is my mate. I can't just throw this away.

For a moment, I can't even hear his breathing. And then in a swift moment, he's kissing me.

I'm not even sure how I allowed him to get so close, to press me up against the tree with the entire weight of his body.

His lips feel exactly as they did last night.

It's a betrayal to my good sense, to everything I promised myself before coming out here tonight, and yet I'm powerless to the feeling of his lips against mine, against the feeling of those undeniable sparks.

He reaches behind my legs, lifting me up until they wrap around his waist.

He holds me with no effort at all, keeping me pressed tightly between the tree and his body. His mouth is hungry, his tongue sweeping through my mouth as if to truly claim me as his.

I don't even know his name and this feels so good.

"This is a bad idea," I gasp out, his mouth trailing down my neck. All I can do is hold onto his back, feeling the powerful muscles beneath his clothes shift with every movement, praying he doesn't leave marks for someone to see tomorrow.

He holds the back of my neck with his hand, murmuring against my skin. "Shh."

The sound is so guttural, so wild with passion that there would be no way for me to recognise it were it someone I knew.

All of a sudden, his hips crush tighter against me, the feeling of friction against my centre causing me to tighten my grip on him, an unabashed moan tumbling past my lips.

How can something so objectively bad feel like this?

Sensing my desperation for him, he presses his hips against me again, the feeling of his arousal causing pleasure to shudder through me.

"That feels really good," I breathe into his neck.

He does it again. And again. All the while, biting gently on my neck, kissing where pain flickers for a moment.

Part of me wants to tear his hood off in this vulnerable moment, to reveal his identity to me, but the fear of ruining this, of stealing away the pleasure Ark has restricted me from for so long is too much to forgo.

He presses against me harder, his movements picking up in pace. Although we are entirely clothed, I don't think I've ever felt this good, even during actual sex with Louis.

So when I feel my release build up, I don't shy away from the feeling, urging him on by pushing my hips right back against his.

"Please don't stop." I tip my head back, unaware of the cold now, of anything else other than the man against me, of who he truly is...

It hits me, sparks of colour exploding in my vision as my climax rolls through me. The feeling is so incredible, the pleasure so overwhelming I can do nothing but ride it out, biting down hard on my lip to keep any moans from slipping.

Reality doesn't return to me for a quiet moment. The harsh breathings of me and my mate fill the air, as he slowly lets me down.

As he backs away, I lean my back against the trunk of the tree, afraid I'll fall down into the snow.

"Could you at least tell me your name?" I ask breathlessly.

He's silent, watching me.

I can see the hesitation, the way his fingers curl up into fists. He wants to say something.

Just say it. Tell me who you are.

All the tension releases from his limbs, as I hear him sigh out.

And without a word, he backs away into the darkness. And I don't follow him.

💚••💚

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! and as always it is available 10 chapters ahead on Radish!

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~Midika 💜🐼