Chapter 5: Deal

"You've got to be kidding me..." I almost whispered between our small distance. I tried to move away from him but his arms around me tightened.

I am a strong independent woman, can stand with my own feet, can hold my head high, and can weave my words effortlessly. I couldn't be a subject of manipulation anymore, swayed by a few threatening words, and be used as an instrument just like a doll. I've learned my lesson. I ran away from home to prove to myself that I was no longer that doll with strings connected with those cunning fingers-- a fool doll that dances gracefully to entertain her master.

I am tough. I didn't run away just to get trapped in another complicated web.

"I am not kidding, Rapunzel..." he pulled me closer.

Hindi na haplos mula sa likuran ng kamay niya ang siyang naramdaman ko. One of his fingers played the loose strand of my hair and made a slow spiral movement on it.

I trembled.  At hindi ko dapat iyon maramdaman. Buong akala ko ay hindi ako magkakaroon ng takot sa ganoong klase ng mata. Those chinito eyes don't seem to be threatening at all. But when his gaze moved intensely at me, with his burning vengeance... I suddenly felt like a beautiful golden butterfly caught by a web, and about to get devoured by a hungry spider. Iba iyong galit niya, hindi iyon para sa akin pero ramdam na ramdam ko ang galit niya.

"Not me... don't ever think that you can use me."

I gathered all my courage to push him away from me, his arms loosened, and I made a few steps backward to put distance between us.

How could he easily switch himself from being the playful guy to a dangerous man?

Muli siyang namulsa at pinagmasdan niya ako.

"Who else? I am going to offer you a good condition, Emilia. I told you, I know someone who had the same situation. I know a lawyer who can easily handle your case."

"After you offered me a marriage, now an affair? What else, Mr. De Mesa?"

He chuckled. "A child?"

Umawang ang bibig ko sa sinabi niya. "I am just kidding, darling. Think about it while you're trapped inside this province." He waved his hand in dismissal, turned his back, and left me alone abducted with his words.

"Mr. De Mesa! Huwag mo akong talikuran!" Malalaki ang hakbang kong hinabol siya. Hindi siya lumingon pabalik sa akin at hindi rin siya nagsalita.

He sat on his sofa and opened the television with his crossed legs.

Namaywang ako sa harapan niya habang nakanguso siyang pinalilipat-lipat ang channel.

"Give me an access to leave this place. Kilala ka ng mga tanod." Madiing sabi ko.

Hindi pa rin siya tumitingin sa akin.

"It's the law, Emilia. Think about my offer, and please... don't think about me attacking you at night. You're not really my type." He said dismissively. He even waved his hand as if that would push me away from the view of his television. 

"Hindi ako magpapagamit sa 'yo!"

His right brow arched, his forefinger playfully tapped the remote, and he slowly looked at me.

Naningkit na naman iyong singkit niyang mga mata. Sinubukan niyang abutin ang dulo ng buhok ko pero mabilis na akong nakaatras.

He chuckled. Again! Nagsisimula na akong maasar sa tawa niyang iyon.

"Darling... maggagamitan tayo..."

"But I don't want to use you... wala akong balak manggamit ng tao." Bigla kong naalala ang sinabi ko sa sarili ko nang naglayas ako.

I was motivated to find a husband and ruin Gothella's plan. I asked for a chinito man. Pero bakit naman ganitong klase ng chinito ang ipinadala sa akin... nang-aano...

He lazily leaned his back on the sofa, placed his head on its rear, and stared at the ceiling for a moment before he slowly turned to look at me.

"Then, I'll teach you how to use me..."

"Oh my goodness!" naiiling na ako sa mga naririnig sa kanya.

"If I wanted to pull your hair, I'll allow you to pull anything from me..."

Natakpan ko na ang mga labi ko sa naririnig sa kanya. Gago ba 'to?!

"Ayokong hilahin... No..." umiiling na sabi ko.

"Then, I'll teach you how to pull it..."

Kinuha ko na ang pinakamalapit na throw pillow at marahas ko iyong inihampas sa mukha niya.

Tinatawan na niya ako. Gago!

"Stop your dirty talk! Ayoko na rito!" He's playing with me!

"Hey! I am just kidding, Lia."

Bago pa man ako tuluyang nakalayo roon sa sofa niya, mabilis siyang nakapunta roon sa dulo kung saan abot kamay niya ako.

"Bitawan mo ako, De Mesa!"

His grip tightened.

He's now kneeling on the sofa. Nakahawak ang isa niyang kamay sa armrest upang alalayan ang kanyang sarili habang ang isa niyang kamay ay mariin nakahawak sa palapulsuhan ko.

Nanliliit ang mga mata niya dahil sa ngisi niyang nakakaloko sa akin.

"Hindi ka na mabiro. You can think about it. I can give you time."

"Bitawan mo 'ko."

"Alright! Don't be pikon. I hope you'll get used to me... I am always this playful with girls."

Proud pa siya niyan?

Tumaas ang kilay ko at marahas kong tinanggal ang kamay ko mula sa kanya. Tumuwid ako ng pagkakatayo at inayos ang damit ko kahit hindi naman iyon nagulo.

Huminga ako ng malalim. "Alright. I'll think about it."

Lumawak ang ngisi niya sa sinabi ko. "Good girl."

Umirap ako. Nagtungo ako sa maliit na sofa at pinagkrus ko rin ang mga hita ko. Bakit ko nga ba hahayaan na paglaruan ako ng lalaking ito?

"Just don't fall in love with me, Lia. This is purely business."

I huffed. He looked really highly to himself. "Deal."

"Huh? That fast?"

He looked suspiciously at me. Of course, who wouldn't? Kanina lang ay halos mabaliw ako sa pagtanggi sa kanya. But as our playful conversation goes on, I suddenly realized that it was him. Siya mismo ang kasagutan sa malaki kong problema.

He's motivated to move because of his own motive, he's rich and wouldn't take an interest in my money. Malandi siya na hinding-hindi ko magugustuhan.

"Tell me about this affair."

Hindi pa rin siya agad maniwala sa sinabi ko. Maybe he'd accept my change of mind for days, but a minute?

Alright. One of the reasons why I suddenly change my decision is his annoying character, na dahil alam niyang malaki ang kanyang... I mean alam niyang malaki ang kaba sa dibdib ko, nagagawa niya akong paglaruan.

When I heard about Fabian and Gothella's relationship, I vowed to myself not to allow anyone to play with me anymore. Pero nang sandaling pumasok ako rito sa Enamel, iyon ang siyang sumalubong sa akin.

I was played. Fuckingly played!

A playful guy with his accomplice. This Kairo Lei and that Sean!

I am starting to think about my beauty. Do I look too innocent that people tend to see me as easy prey? I was in the middle of my vulnerability, and this Chinese man, together with his dearest friend, tried to take advantage of me. Hanggang kailan ko hahayaan ang mga taong ito na tingnan akong mahina at sunud-sunuran sa kanilang mga gusto?

The Lia before would run, she would play safe and look for a harmless alternative. She wouldn't take the risk. But now, I am different. I am new. I am not the well-sheltered princess inside the tall tower showered by sweet words full of fallacy.

If this Chinese man will be the start of my new journey... then I'll embrace it. Anuhin niya man ako... aanuhin ko rin siya, kung ano man ang anuhin na iyon, gago siya.

"Are you sure?" I could see doubts in his eyes.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I just realized that you're right. I don't have any choice but to choose your offer."

Inilagay ko sa kanang balikat ko ang mahaba kong buhok at unti-unti kong tinanggal ang pagkakatirintas nito.

"Alright. After the lockdown, you should return home and act as if nothing happened. You are still not aware of Gothella's nature."

Tumango ako. Pinagpatuloy ng mga daliri ko ang paglalaro sa mahaba kong buhok.

"You will continue your relationship with your ex-boyfriend."

"Hmm... and?"

"Let's have an affair. You should deceive them and act like a good girl who follows their plan, and then little by little we'll let them discover that you have a secret relationship with me... sa isang De Mesa." His jaw tightened.

He already planned all of this. Hindi pa man ako nagmumulat nang itali niya ako sa upuan, inihanda na niya ang lahat laban kay Gothella.

"How long are we going to--"

"Magpalamig ka muna, Lia. Don't worry, I'll always monitor. I'll be around."

Napangiwi ako. "Wala ka bang trabaho?"

"Marami. Now back to our plan..."

Hindi na ako nagsalita at pinakinggan ko na lang ang mga plano niya. "I'll contact Atty. Mirano about your case, as what I've promised. What do you want to do? Alam kong hindi lang ako ang may galit kay Gothella. After you've learned about her intentions and all."

Humigpit ang hawak ko sa buhok ko. Of course, malaki rin ang galit ko sa Gothella na iyon. Isama pa si Fabian!

Kumirot ang dibdib ko nang maalala ang mga narinig mula sa pag-uusap nila. Those rats shattered my young poor heart. Binitawan ko na ang buhok ko at ipinatong ko ang mga kamay ko sa aking mga hita.

I balled my fists. Kailanman ay hindi naging maganda ang paghihiganti sa kapwa, pero silang dalawa ang nagtulak sa akin na tahakin ang bagay na ito. They used me, they fooled me.

"I want to get even with them... Gothella and Fabian... I'll make him pay. I'll make him wish to..." gusto kong pagsisihan niya ang pagpili sa babaeng iyon.

I don't know if this pain is what they called love or my damn ego, na nagawa akong ipagpalit ng isang gwapong lalaki sa mas matandang babae. Hindi ba ako ganoon kaganda? Sobrang wala na ba talagang pera, Fabian?

Inaamin ko na naging masaya ako, kinilig at natutuwa sa tuwing magkasama kami ni Fabian. I was too excited to meet him before! Kasi akala ko siya na... that I found love, kahit lagi akong nakakulong sa bahay, na may lalaking magtitiyaga sa akin sa kabila ng mahigpit kong tiyahan.

I thought he was the one...

"I'll make him regret."

Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko. My days of suppressing my emotions suddenly collapsed and knocked on my thick wall of denial, which caused me to understand the reality of my situation.

I was fooled...

Niloko ako ng lalaking akala ko ay mahal na mahal ako dahil sa pera. Isang malaking dagok iyon... hindi lang sa puso ko kundi sa buong pagkababae ko.

Lumuha na ako habang nakatungo. "I'll make them pay... manggagamit sila..."

Kairo Lei De Mesa stood from his sofa. I thought he refused to look at me, crying again, but I felt his presence behind me with his arms stretched at both sides of the sofa's armrests. I could see our reflection against the mirror in front of us.

And when he leaned at me... near my ear, I felt a sudden tingle on my spine. "Tell me... how are you going to make him pay?"

"I'll tease him."

"A little..." he added.

"I'll make him crazy about me..."

"No kissing..."

Napalingon na ako sa kanya. Ramdam ko ang saglit na pagsasayad ng tungki ng ilong namin sa isa't isa.

"Don't teach me how, De Mesa. I know."

Nanatili kami sa ganoong posisyon. This time I gathered all my strength not to pull away. He's testing me! He's playing with me.

Dahil alam niyang mas magaling siya sa akin at sanay sa ganitong bagay, magagawa niyang kwestiyunin ang mga gagawin ko. This plan against Gothella isn't just all about him. Para rin ito sa akin at sa galit ko sa panlolokong ginawa nila sa akin ni Fabian. We'll join our force, but I'll make sure that I wouldn't allow him to order around.

I saw the movement of his Adam's apple. "Try."

"What?"

"I said try it to me."

Bigla akong kinabahan. I never had an experience about seduction! Pero alam kong ako ang mapapahiya kung hindi ko paninindigan ang sinabi ko sa kanya.

Pilit kong hindi pinansin ang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko. And I started to move. Marahan kong iginalaw ang isa kong kamay hanggang sa hawakan niyon ang kamay niyang nakapatong sa sofa, ganoon din ang ginawa ng isa kong kamay hanggang sa tuluyan na akong nakaharap sa kanya habang nakaluhod ang tuhod ko sa sofa.

He's still tall, kaya kahit bahagya siyang nakayuko sa akin ay mas matangkad pa rin siya. But I made sure that our faces were still a few inches apart, that we could almost feel the breathing of each other.

Hinayaan ko ang ilang hibla ng makapal, mala-ginto at mahaba kong buhok na sumagabal sa mukha ko. "Mommy Gothella's not around..." bulong ko sa kanya.

He gulped. Ramdam ko ang pangangatal ng dalawa niyang kamay pero mahigpit ang hawak ko roon na hindi niya ako magawang hawakan.

"Let go, Lia..."

"But she's not around..."

"Darling, it's done. You passed. Let go of me."

Nang sandaling pakawalan ko ang mga kamay niya ay maagap kong ikinawit ang mga braso ko sa batok niya dahilan kung bakit hindi siya agad nakalayo sa akin.

"I thought you'll teach me how to use you..." hila ko papalapit sa kanya.

That caught him off guard. Buong akala niya ay hahayaan ko na siya.

Mariin siyang napapikit na parang isang malaking pagkakamali itong ginawa niya. Naramdaman ko na ang isa niyang kamay sa likuran ko habang pinaglalaruan ang ilang hibla ng buhok ko.

"Of course. We'll get there, Lia... while we darling each other, hihilahin din natin ang isa't isa..."

Bigla akong nakaramdam ng pagkaubos ng hangin sa sinabi niya. Kahit kailan ay hindi ko naisip na darating ang pagkakataong may kakaibang epektong ibibigay sa akin ng salitang hila.

The tip of his nose started to play with my right cheek before I felt his gentle yet tingling whisper. "And then as time goes by... you'll soon whisper to me..."

"H-hilahin mo 'ko..." nahihirapang sagot ko.

Umiling siya. I almost lose my sanity when I heard his soft, hot, and teasing voice. "Ni-hihila mo 'ko, Kairo..."