October 31st 2004

Dear Diary,

October 31st was a peculiar date for Hyacinth. When younger, the date had meant much more to her than it did now that she was an adult. Her childhood years yearned for what she had lost on that day. Hyacinth used to find herself wishing for what could have been. For the life she lost on Halloween. But now, now she could no longer mourn for what could have been. She found herself mourning for the memories she did not have. 

There was one thing that the Potter twins did not share. Despite both being in the room it happened, Hyacinth did not have any recollection of her mother's death. She could never pull forth the memory of the passing of Lily Potter. Unlike her brother who could clearly remember the night where both of their parents perished, Hyacinth had no memories. She had no recollection of any of the time her parents were in her life. She could not tell what they looked like in real person. The only connection she had to her parents were the photos she had been given over the years. 

James and Lily Potter were people she should have known but knew very little of. They were as much of a connection to her than a random person passing on the road beside her. 

This was not the same for her best friend. Neville did lose his parents that very same night but not in the same way. For Frank and Alice Longbottom were still present but they could and would never be able to be part of their son's life. Dangled before him but so far out of his reach. The similarities, yet striking differences, between the two friends had been initially what had brought them both so close to one another. The shared loss of a parent whether permanent or not had been a bonding factor when every other 11 year old excitedly talked about going home to their family for the holidays but theirs was incomplete. And that was why they had taken it upon themselves to try and change the date for themselves. 

As the years passed, Hyacinth did not find herself desperately needing to force herself to associate the date to something else. The longing for her parents had vanished around the time she was sixteen. Having become lost as to what it felt like having a parental figure. Neville's grandmother was not exactly a good replacement for a parent and she had never been invited around the Weasley household to experience the people who had become surrogate parents to Harry. Sure she would never turn someone away when she generally felt as though they could be that figure in her life. But she had stopped searching for them. Neville had lucked out in the last year or so as he was taken in by the Abbotts, Hannah's parents had accepted him almost instantly. And Neville finally had the parental figures which meant so much to him. 

"Di." Neville's voice would snap Hyacinth back to reality from where she had zoned out staring over her bowel of porridge. The large over the top and clearly costumey witches hat she was wearing was dangerously close to ending up in her food. Hyacinth moved her head back to avoid tipping it into the substance below and looked over to her friend. Only to meet a very concerned look. 

"Yes?" She questioned back unsure as to what he was so concerned about. 

"You've been staring into space for nearly twenty minutes. Is there any lights on at all in there?" Neville was joking but Hyacinth could hear the general worry he felt for her in his tone. The pair were much closer than she was with her own brother and Neville was often the 'brother' she thought of first when it came to thinking about her family. The pressure of the 'chosen one' label having come between the twins many, many years ago. 

"Yeah I'm okay, my thoughts however are not."

"Maybe you should take the day off today, give the kids a free period each." Neville suggested loud enough that the other staff members around them could hear him. 

"I'll be fine to teach, I swear."

Hyacinth was in fact not okay to teach. 

Her brain had remained on overdrive all day, creating scenarios which scarily became more and more lifelike as the hours passed. And by her fourth period she had to call it a quits and cancel her last lessons. Scared that she would do something stupid in front of the children, she sent them away with the chance to rest, study or just spend time with their friends. The students may have been happy but she was growing more and more concerned for herself. 

Halloween had not effected her really since she was sixteen. Since she had given up on the fantasy of a life with her parents. A fantasy of ever really knowing lots about them. And with the final goodbyes to every other person who could have given her more information, she had learnt that the dreams she had as a little girl were never going to come true. So she was left to get lost in her own mind as her brain started to go down paths it had abandoned a long time ago. 

Hyacinth had left herself to her own classroom, somewhere that for many years had brought her comfort even when it was not her room. Charms had been the subject of which came at most ease to her, she hadn't exactly been a natural as she did a lot of studying but she hadn't been far off. She had sat in a chair which was located where her old desk would have roughly been, though she had since changed the layout of the room and therefore it was not going to replicate the time of which she was a teen herself. But it was providing enough comfort. 

The clicks of heels entering the room was enough to turn her attention away from the wall of which she had been fixated upon for a lengthy period of time. And as Hyacinth turned her eyes she met the aged eyes of her own professor. Her old head of house had entered the room, and collected a chair to sit it opposite her own. 

"Hyacinth." The elder witch started and for once Hyacinth did not have it in her to oppose the use of her birth name. 

"Professor."

"You know it never did surprise me that Charms was the area of which you excelled at." The woman started and Hyacinth found herself listening intensely to her words. This was something new to Hyacinth the professor having never once shared these words with her before. 

"It doesn't?"

"No your father was incredibly blessed when it came to charm work. It was his strongest class." Minerva shared the slither of information and Hyacinth felt herself perk up. It had been years since she had last heard anything useful about her parents. It had been a long time since she was the first person to hear this kind of information, everyone had always given it to her brother first and he would then pass it on. 

"Really?"

"Oh yes. He was the one to do most of the charm work for that little map of yours. He was incredibly talented when it came to the world of charms." 

"I wow... I'm not sure what to think of this professor."

"Well for starters you can stop calling me professor and maybe I'll trade some more information." The grin she was given was enough for Hyacinth to know that her old professor was only joking whenever she asked for her full name. 

"Sorry Minnie."

"Better, I'm not particularly sure where you picked that name up from either, but I know your father started it too." Minevra paused as she was going to say something controversial next. "Many people say your brother looks like your father, that is indeed true. But that boy shares very little of the personality traits of either of your parents. I assume that has something to do with your upbringing." Minevra paused. Taking a deep breath inwards unsure whether her next words would be useful or make the situation worse. 

"You however, I look at you and sometimes feel as though your father is staring me back. The mannerisms the personality a lot of it is your father. He might have not been around for much of your life but he is with you always." Hyacinth relished the words, she often heard very little when it came to comparisons to her parents. Once again, everyone seemed to do it for Harry reminding him that he looked like their father with the eyes of their mother. But they would say nothing to the female twin. Often shrugging her off to move topics onto whatever was going on at the time. 

"However, your ability to forgive, to give people chances who probably do not deserve them. Especially from yourself that is all your mother. They would both be incredibly proud of the young woman you have become. I know I am." And Hyacinth felt the tears of which she had been holding back finally flow free. 

"Really?"

"I try not to have favourites. But you still managed to wiggle your way in." The older witch stood with her words, an indication that her part in the conversation was over. She went to leave the room, but not before meddling just a little further. 

"Stay here Diana, I'll send someone else to keep you company. Don't come to dinner tonight I'll have something brought to you." 

Hyacinth would sit alone for another twenty or thirty minutes her mind going through the tiny slithers of information she had been provided over and over again. Like a broken record she was stuck, feeling that longing she thought had long gone reignite. And the deep dark feeling of loneliness start to take over once again. 

"Hyacinth." There was only one person in the school other than the headmistress who called her that name. And as a familiar head of bleach blonde hair made its way around the corner and into her classroom, Hyacinth looked up. She had not expected him to be the one sent by the headmistress to essentially babysit Hyacinth until she felt mentally better but she had a feeling the older woman was attempting to meddle once again. 

"Draco." She greeted back wondering just what the man was going to do. Draco walked himself into the room, taking some time to survey it and the major changes which had occurred since the change in staff had occurred. His eyes looking for the long drawn out benches they had once sat upon, only to not be able to spot them at all. 

"You've changed the room."

"The benches were really getting on my nerves. Kept tripping on the stupid things when trying to tidy up."

"I like it."

"Thanks, I think." The conversation lulled for a moment neither knowing exactly where to take the topic to next.  Hyacinth took the chance to properly look at the man who had taken it upon himself to sit in a chair opposite her. Potentially trying to imitate where he had originally sat in the room as a teen. 

"I know this date can't be easy for you." Draco started noting as he got the witches full attention, where she had been he didn't know. He was also unsure where exactly he was heading where it came to his own sentences. 

"It's okay, it's hard to miss something you never really had." Hyacinth did what she did best when it came to people pitying her on this date in particular but any big date when it came to her parents. 

"That doesn't matter Hyacinth. Whether you recall them or not, they were your parents and it's not fair to you that you missed growing up with them." Draco didn't like the way she was brushing things off. She deserved to be sad on this day, on any day she wanted because her childhood sucked. She could be sad about that, about her teenage years whatever she wanted. 

"But I'm no the only one who grew up without them."

"Yeah but I've never heard anyone ask you, it's always Harry this, Harry that. You mean as much, your feelings mean something too." Draco's words struck a cord in Hyacinth as she realised just how much he must be paying attention if that was the case. And just how kind his soul was even if others were not seeing it. 

"Harry is the chosen one. I am clearly not."

"You are the chosen one to some people." Draco chose to move the conversation on before he found himself saying something incredibly awkward. "Is that why you chose to come back and work here? The link to your parents."

"Yeah it sounds a little stupid when you think about it, but they spent seven years here and before we finished I had only just started to discover things that they did or left a mark upon and I wanted to find more." Hyacinth wasn't sure how that came across to the man so she would have to wait for his response. 

"It's not stupid. I completely understand. Well as best as I can." Draco's words were what she needed to hear even if she wasn't aware of it. 

Forever,

H. Diana Potter