"If you want to play piano, but you're bad at playing piano, you practice and you get better. Don't be the kind of white person who doesn't post out of fear of f***ing up. If you want to support black people, but you're bad at supporting black people, practice and get better." Akilah Hughes

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XXIV. California Here We Come

To the other passengers sitting in first class, Sophie was sure that she looked like a terrified flyer. They were sipping their two hundred quid a glass champagne and looking upon her like she was a maniac.

The lovely flight attendant had brought Maddie some apple juice in a champagne glass and has asked her how she was feeling.

Maddie had replied, "Good, thank you. How are you?"

And that was when Sophie had burst into hysterical sobs. Maddie had been working on reciprocal conversation with Elaine, and she had just engaged in a two-way conversation with a stranger that did not hold an interest for her. Sophie had never seen Maddie do that before.

"Ma'am, can I get you anything at all?" the flight attendant asked, her voice concerned.

Sophie grabbed the linen napkin that had been put before her along with her champagne and dabbed her eyes. "Oh, please don't mind me," she excused. "We'll be alright."

The flight attendant smiled and left to check in with the couple travelling in the seat behind them.

"Mummy, this is such a big chair!" Maddie exclaimed, wriggling her little bottom into the seat.

"I know," remarked Sophie, dabbing her eyes again. No one could have been more surprised than her when she and Maddie had arrived at the desk for their flight to receive their boarding passes, only to learn that they were travelling first class. Sophie and Maddie were promptly escorted to a lounge that was posher than anything she'd seen before.

Maddie had helped herself to the masses of gourmet fruit arrangements, cut and placed to look like bunches of flowers. No sooner had they been touched, an attendant quickly replenished them so that they looked just as perfect.

They had waited in the lounge on two of the comfiest leather armchairs for several hours, watching the planes come and go, from the best window in Heathrow. They were never without anything, as waiters roamed with tea and coffee and trays of delicious canapés and vol-au-vents.

When it came time to board, Sophie felt really awkward at being escorted onto the plane, and given priority boarding over the other passengers. But she couldn't deny that sitting with Maddie in their own little cocoon would make the journey that much easier.

They sat in two wide, comfortable chairs with a wide armrest in between them. In front of them was a table filled with complimentary snacks and lotions, as well as sets of pyjamas and blankets.

The television came stocked with more films than she could count, and Maddie had already discovered the remote, though nothing would play just yet, as there was a message on screen about the upcoming safety demonstration.

Sophie hated to think how much these tickets were costing Noah. She could not afford to fly to Ireland in economy, let alone Los Angeles in first class. She had texted Noah, admonishing him for the expense, but he had merely told her to have a safe flight and that he would see them both when they landed.

It had been a long three weeks, and Sophie was so excited to see Noah. Sophie had never experienced missing someone before.

Aside from, of course, Maddie's fateful trip with her grandparents to Fuerteventura which ended very prematurely due to Keith and Maureen not knowing how to communicate properly with Maddie when she was having a meltdown.

But Sophie had been more worried, really, and too terribly anxious to think about missing Maddie.

Sophie had never been attached enough to another person to miss them. She did not have that sort of relationship with her parents, and the only boyfriend that she had ever had was Beck.

She missed laughing with him and feeling a sense of ease in a day that might have been filled with tears. She missed talking to him, and feeling like she could tell him anything, confess to any guilty thought that had crossed her mind and receiving nought but a supportive ear. She missed the way he talked about his family. She liked hearing about his sisters and listening to the admiration in his voice as he spoke of them. Sophie adored how he complained about his mum, but in a way that told her that Noah would walk through fire for her if she asked.

And gosh, Sophie missed seeing him. She missed turning her head to the right as she walked through the door of Pete's and seeing Noah at the piano. Even more, she missed seeing Maddie sit right up there beside him.

Sophie had received Maddie's half year school report a few days earlier, a day which she had only a few months ago been dreading. Every report that she had ever received had said the same thing in the nicest possible way.

With support, Madeleine is developing her knowledge of phonemes to decode unknown words.

With encouragement, Madeleine is beginning to write her letters with correct directionality.

With assistance, Madeleine can identify two-digit numbers and is working towards counting by 10s.

Sophie knew how to read between the lines.

But this report ... Sophie wanted to print it out and frame it! Maddie had progressed. She was now at a Year 3 level in maths. Her reading had moved forward by eighteen months.

Madeleine demonstrates outstanding phonemic awareness and is working towards reading for meaning in more challenging texts.

Sophie had needed to Google what phonemic awareness was! Never in her wildest dreams could she had imagined that in only a few short months she would be reading such things about Maddie!

Her pride needed to spill out, and she had emailed her report to Noah, wanting to share it with someone. Really, she wouldn't have blamed him if he hadn't taken much notice.

But he had sent back a video of himself telling Maddie that he was so proud of her.

And the tears shed on that night were probably the reason that Sophie was feeling dehydrated now.

She couldn't wait to see him.

Once the flight attendants had done their safety demonstration, Sophie pulled Maddie's new noise cancelling headphones out of their carry-on bag and gave her a sweet to suck on for the take off to pop her ears. The headphones had been advised by Elaine, to limit sensory overload. While Maddie didn't seem to have any sensory sensitivities, a long-haul flight was new, and it was best to travel on the safe side.

Sophie held Maddie's hand, but Maddie's eyes were fixed out the window as she watched the plane take off. She was amazed.

***

While she never imagined herself to be a snob, not even when she lived in Kensington with her parents, being able to lie down flat on a twelve-hour flight was a dream.Both she and Maddie had managed to get some decent hours of sleep while on the flight and had filled the remaining hours with some really nice food, and a succession of Disney princess movies.

The flight attendants came around and prepared the cabin for landing and Sophie filled out her customs form. She and Maddie both sucked on another sweet for the landing before she checked that her phone had automatically changed time zones.

She decided not to take her phone off of airplane mode. She couldn't risk being charged by the phone company an exorbitant fee for an international text message. It would mean that nobody back home would be able to contact her, but after saying her goodbyes to everyone at Pete's, they shouldn't have needed to.

US Immigration took a long time, and keeping Maddie entertained was an effort in itself. There was only so much I Spy that Sophie could take. Just like UK Immigration was incredibly strict for foreign visitors, the US was no different.

"Where are you from, ma'am?" asked a gruff inspector, seated behind a clear, Perspex screen.

"We're from London," replied Sophie shakily.

"What's the purpose of your visit?"

"We are on holiday," continued Sophie. She did not need to be nervous, but it was hard not to think you were going to be carted off to airport jail when these officers were scrutinising your passport. "Visiting my boyfriend for Christmas."

The immigration officer slipped Sophie's and Maddie's passports back under the screen and waved them on, calling for the next family in line.

"Happy Christmas," she wished, before moving on.

Sophie and Maddie collected their luggage and made their way through customs before they could finally walk out into the airport arrival hall. Sophie had a vice grip on Maddie's hand as she they walked. She had never seen an airport so busy before, but it was only a few days to Christmas. Maddie trotted alongside Sophie as she looked through the crowd for a familiar face.

Sophie finally spotted Noah leaning against the wall of a souvenir shop, waiting with a shorter blonde woman. The moment he saw Sophie, a huge smile spread across his face and he launched off of the wall, weaving through the crowd and running towards her.

The moment he reached her, Sophie released her suitcase and wrapped the arm that was not holding onto Maddie around his neck. Noah leaned down and kissed Sophie deeply and she could have melted into him in that moment.

"God, I missed you," he whispered as they parted.

"I missed you terribly," Sophie whispered back, uttering the understatement of the century.

Noah beamed down at Maddie, his blue eyes lighting up. "Hey, kid!" he exclaimed.

Maddie pulled her hand from Sophie's so that she could jump up to Noah. Noah received her enthusiastically and hugged Maddie against his chest.

"You got taller!" he cried. "I missed you, too!"

Sophie wasn't going to cry, she willed herself.

"Mummy only let me play on the piano sometimes," Maddie cried, as though three weeks hadn't passed, and she was continuing a conversation. "So can we play on the piano again?"

Noah chuckled. "I'm afraid my piano isn't a Steinway, not even close. But you can play on it all you want."

"She watched a video on YouTube of someone playing Frozen on the piano and picked it up ... there's only so much I can take," Sophie explained with a grimace.

"Maybe my piano is broken?" Noah winked.

Sophie laughed as Noah took the handle of their suitcase in one hand, and Maddie's in the other, and led them over to the blonde woman that he had been waiting with.

Sophie had seen her picture on Noah's phone, and so she recognised her as Tally, his twin sister. Sophie's first impression of Tally was that she was so cool. Her hair, the way she dressed, her jewellery ... everything completed her look. Her hair was bleached, and shaved on one side, with the other side curled and tousled to perfection. Her ear was visible on the shaved side, and Sophie could see about seven small lobe and helix studs sparkling. Her face was thin and angular, but in a way that made her look elegant and distinctive. She had achieved the sort of winged eyeliner that Sophie could only dream of, and her full lips were painted a nude pink.

She wore tight black jeans, cut off at the ankles with a pair of white, platform trainers, and a cropped sweatshirt with an expensive looking logo printed across her chest.

But her big smile that touched her eyes made Sophie feel less intimidated. It still wasn't lost on Sophie that Tally was his sister and his best friend rolled into one. If they didn't get on, it would be game over.

"Sophie, this is my sister, Tally," Noah introduced proudly. "Tally, this is my girlfriend, Sophie."

"It's so nice to meet you," Sophie started, trying to sound confident. "Noah has told me so much about you."

Tally grinned. "I'm so glad go meet you!" She hugged Sophie in greeting, and Sophie relaxed a little more. "And thankful that you're here. It means Noah can stop crooning and whining so much after he gets off the phone with you."

Noah rolled his eyes. "Did I mention that Tally's adopted?" he bit back.

Sophie laughed. "I've probably been the same way, don't worry."

"Oh my God, I'm obsessed with your accent," she gushed. "You sound just like Hermione from Harry Potter."

Sophie thought it such a random comparison, and it made her laugh again.

"But I know you!" Tally exclaimed knowingly at Maddie, grinning down at her. "We've met before. Do you remember me, Maddie? I was about this big on Noah's cell phone." Tally made a rectangle phone shape with her fingers.

"Yes, I like your hair," replied Maddie nodding. "What are your interests?"

Sophie beamed proudly. "It's the reciprocal conversation she's been practising," she explained to Noah and Tally.

Tally took a breath and thought, "Well, I'm interested in school, my sixth graders, my family, my friends, new," she smiled at Sophie, "and old. And I love Disney movies, and listening to beautiful piano playing. What are you interested in, Maddie?"

Maddie beamed. "I like Disney and piano, too!" she cried. She had been learning to identify common interests in hopes that she could connect with children her own age.

"What a coincidence!" cried Tally. "Come on, let's get out of here. We've got Disney plus at home."

Noah and Maddie walked ahead with Sophie's bags while Tally and Sophie walked together as they all made their way out into the carpark.

"I feel like I should give you a heads up about Joy. I know Noah probably already has warned you, but you really need it twice," Tally murmured comically.

"He might have said something," replied Sophie.

"Mom only had one out of four kids home for Thanksgiving. Christmas is going to be nuts. And Noah has a girlfriend ... Joy will be having conniptions. You will probably be able to sue Noah for your therapy. You'll also go home having gained five pounds in sugar cookies and a hideous Christmas sweater."

Sophie would take an overenthusiastic mum over her own any day. "I'm really excited to meet her," she confessed. "Nervous as anything, but excited."

"Were you nervous to meet me?" Tally asked curiously.

"Yes," admitted Sophie. "Noah adores you. If you hate me, I have no chance."

Tally smiled slyly. "I feel oddly powerful," she joked. She then bumped Sophie with her hip. "The adoration goes both ways. I love my brother, and it means everything to me to see him happy," she said sincerely.

----

Hope you enjoyed it!

It's been a big week, and I hope you all are safe and protected, and most importantly, empowered.

It's definitely been a week of reflection for me, and a time where I've really checked my privilege. Like a lot of people I have NEVER felt unsafe or discriminated against because of my skin colour. I can't imagine what that is like, and like a lot of people, I am listening and learning, and most importantly, teaching. Teaching the next generation to love one another, regardless of ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion, gender identity ... or what bloody football team you go for. Hate is not born, it's taught.

This week I read my class "I'm Australian Too" by Mem Fox.

I said in my post earlier this week that I wish I could say something more profound or thoughtful. Some people really do have a gift of saying things in a way that makes people listen and remember who said them. I think that's why I love putting quotes at the beginning of my chapters.

So I'll leave you with this: I'm an ally, and a very proud one.

Not profound, but completely sincere.

Be safe, and be loud xxx