Your POV

At the time we were in the living room watching a show called Duck-tective. It was actually pretty funny. The twins were on the floor, between them was a bowl of popcorn. I was on the couch upside down, my feel against the back area.

Constable: *tv* I'm afraid your services won't be required here, sir. My men have examined the evidence and this is obviously an accident.

Duck-tective: *tv, in quacks* Accident, Constable? Or was it... murder?!?!?

Constable: What?!?!?!?

Announce: *tv* Duck-tective will return after these messages.

Mabel: That duck is a genius!!!

You: A man was squished by a phone booth. How is that not murder?

Dipper: Yeah, plus I bet it's easier to find clues when you're that close to the ground.

Mabel: Are you saying you can outwit Duck-textive?!?

Dipper: I have very keen powers of observation. For example, just by smelling your breath I can tell that you have been eating *sniffs* an entire tube of toothpaste?

Mabel: It was so sparkle...

You: Is that dangerous...?!?

Soos: *slides in* Hey dudes!!! You'll never guess what I found!!!

Dipper: Buried treasure!!!

Mabel: Buried- hehey!!! *playfully pushes Dipper* I was gonna say that!!!

You, Dipper, and Mabel: *follow Soos through a dark hallway and to a door*

Soos: So I was cleaning up when I found this secret door hidden behind the wallpaper! It's crazy bonkers creepy...!

We enter the room. It was filled with weird wax statues of people throughout history. It gave me a weird creepy vibe.

Dipper: Whoa, it's a secret wax museum...!!!

Mabel: They're so lifelike...!!!

Dipper: Except for that one.

???: Hello!!!

You, Dipper, Mabel, and Soos: AHH!!!

Stan: It's just me!!! Your Grunkle Stan!!!

You, Dipper, Mabel, and Soos: AHHHHHH!!!! *run out the room*

~when they come back in~

Stan: Behold the Gravity Falls Wax Museum. It was one of my most popular attractions!!! Before I forgot all about it. I got'm all!!! Genghis Khan, Sherlock Holmes, *looks at Larry King* Some kind of, I don't know, goblin man?

Dipper: Ewgh, is anyone else getting the creeps here?!?

You: I know, right?!? It's like they're watching us...!!!

Stan: And now for my personal favorite: Wax Abraham Lincoln, right over- *sees that's it a puddle of wax* Oh oh!!! Oh no!!! C'mon!!! Who left the blinds open?!? Wax John Wilkes Booth, I'm looking at your direction!!! *kneels on one knee and picks up liquid wax with his finger, then sighs* How do you fix a wax figure?

Mabel: Cheer up, Grunkle Stan!!! Where's that smile~!!!

Stan: Eh.

Mabel: *pokes Stan* Beep bap boop!!!

Stan: Ow.

Mabel: Don't worry, Grunkle Stan, I'll make you a new wax figure from all this old wax!!!

Stan: You really think you can make one of these puppies?

Mabel: Grunkle Stan, I am an arts and crafts master!!! Why do you think I always have this glue gun stuck to my arm?!? *tries to shake off the glue gum*

Stan: I like your gumption, kid!

Mabel: I don't know what that word means, but thank you!

Later on Dipper and I went to the room Mabel was at to check on. Dipper was drinking a Pit Cola, and I was eating a bag of chips when...

Mabel: Guys!!!

Dipper: *chokes on his soda*

You: *pat his back*

Mabel: What do you think of my wax figure idea?!? *shows you and Dipper a drawing* She's part princess, and part horse fairy princess!!!

You: It makes me want to burn my eyes.

Dipper: *elbows you* M-maybe you should carve something from real life!

Mabel: *draws* Like a waffle, *shows you and Dipper* with bug arms!!!

Dipper: Y-ok, or something else. Like someone in your family.

Stan: *walks in* Kids, have you seen my pants? *stands in a "heroic" pose*

Mabel: *turns around* Oh muse, you work in mysterious ways...!!!

Stan: Why is your sister talking to the ceiling?

It took hours, but Mabel finally finished. Soos, Pine, and I were in the room with Mabel.

Mabel: I think it needs more glitter.

Soos: Agreed. *gives Mabel a bucket with glitter which she throws at the wax figure*

Stan: *walks in* I found my pants, but now I'm missing- Whoa whoa!!! *falls back*

Mabel: What do you think?!?

Stan: I think... the Wax Museum is back in business!!!

And so the next day people started to arrive to the Mystery Shack to see Mabel's new wax statue. There were so many people coming that I began to think Stan bribed them. Stan and Mabel were at the stage while Dipper, Wendy, and I were at the ticket booth.

I, however, left to get myself a snack and to leave Dipper and Wendy alone. It was so obvious that Pine liked Wendy, so might as well do him a favor.

When I came back it was time.

Stan: *clears his throat and fixes the mic* You all know me, folks. Town darling Mr. Mystery. Please, ladies, control yourselves!!! As you know, I always bring the people of this fair town novelties and befuddlement, the lights of which the world has never known. But enough about me. Behold... *takes off a sheet revealing a Wax Stan statue* Me!!!

Soos: *plays winner music on his keyboard, then some Yeah noises*

Two Guys from Audience: *clap slowly and unamused* 

Guy From Audience: *coughs*

Stan: And now a word from our own: Mabelangelo!!!

Mabel: *takes the mic* It's Mabel. Thank you for coming!!! I made this sculpture with my own two hands!!!! It's covered in my blood, sweat, tears, and other fluids!!!

Audience: *make sounds of disgust*

Mabel: Hehe, yeah. I will now take questions!!! You there!!!

McGucket: Old Man McGucket: local kook. Are the wax figures alive and follow up question: can I survive the wax man uprising?

Mabel: Um... yes!!! Next question!!!

Toby: Toby Determined: Gravity Falls gossiper. Do you really think this constitutes a wonder of the world?

Stan: You're microphone's a turkey baster, Toby.

Toby: It certainly is-

Stan: Next question!!!

Shandra: Shandra Jimenez: a real reporter. Your fliers promised free pizza with admission to this event, is this true?

Audience: *complain*

Stan: ...that was a typo. Goodnight, everyone!!! *throws a smoke bomb and runs away*

Long story short, people were NOT that there was no free pizza.

Anyways, later that night the twins and I were in the bathroom brushing our teeth when we heard Stan yelling from downstairs. The twins ran downstairs while I fly closely behind them to see wax Stan had been decapitated?!?

Some time later, Sheriff Blubs and his Deputy Durland came to investigate.

Stan: I get up to use the jot, right? And when I come back, BLAMMO, he's headless!!!

Mabel: My expert handcrafting, besmirched!!! BESMIRCHED!!!

Dipper: Who would do something like this...?!?

Durland: What's your opinion, Sheriff Blubs?

Blubs: Look, we'd love to help you, folks, but let's facts: this case is unsolvable.

You, Dipper, Mabel, and Stan: WHAT?!?

Stan: You take that back Sheriff Blubs!!!

You: And what facts?!? You guys haven't investigated anything!!!

Dipper: Yeah, there must be evidence, motives, you know I could help if you want.

Mabel: He's really good!!! He figured out who was eating our tin cans!!!

Dipper: All signs pointed to the goat.

Stan: Yeah yeah, let the boy help!!! He's got a little brain up in his head!!!

Blubs: Ooh, would you look at what we got here!!! City boy thinks he's gonna solve a mystery with his fancy computer phone!!!

Durland: City BOOOOY, city BOY!!!

Blubs: You are adorable!

Dipper: Adorable?!? *glares at the two policemen who are now laughing*

You: Hey, I'm the only one who can call him adorable!

Dipper: *glares at you*

Blubs: Look, pjs, how 'bout you leave the investigating to the grownups, ok?

Blubs and Durland: *high five*

Voice Through Walkie Talkie: Attention all units, Steve is going to fit an entire cantaloupe in his mouth, repeat, and entire cantaloupe.

Durland: It's a 23:16!!!

Blubs: Let's move.

Blubs and Durland: *run off*

Dipper: That's it!!! Girls, we're going to find the jerk who did this and get back that head!!! Then we'll see who's adorable. *sneezes like an adorable kitten😍*

You: Oh my freaking goodness that was the most adorable sneeze I have ever heard!!!

Mabel: I know, he sneezes like a kitten!!!

Dipper: *glares at you and Mabel*

The next morning...

Dipper: Stan has lost his head and it's up to us to find it.

Mabel: *snaps a few pictures*

Dipper: There were a lot of unhappy customers at the unveiling, the murderer could have been anyone.

You: *with a silly voice* Yeah, even us!

You and Mabel: *laugh*

Dipper: C'mon, you two, this is serious!

You: Dude, chill. I'm just trying to lighten the mood.

Dipper: *rolls his eyes before taking out his journal* In this town, anything is possible. Ghosts, zombies, could be months before we find our first clue.

Mabel: *points at footprints* Hey look, a clue!!!

You: Footprints in the shag carpet!

Mabel: That's weird, they've got a hole in them!

Dipper: And they're leading to...

You, Dipper, and Mabel: *look behind the couch to find an axe, then you all exchange surprised glances*

~skip to gift shop~

Dipper: So what do you think?

Soos: *examining the axe* In my opinion, this is an axe. 

Mabel: Wait a minute, the lumberjack!!!

Dipper and Mabel: Of course!!!

Dipper: He was furious when he didn't get that free pizza!!!

Mabel: Furious enough for murder!!!

You: You mean Manly Dan? He has a pretty short temper, yes, but I doubt it's him.

Soos: But if you want to talk to him, he hangs out at this crazy intense biker joint downtown.

Mabel: Then that's where we're going!

Dipper: But how will we find the place?

You: I can take you guys, I've been there a couple of times.

Mabel: Perfect!!!

Soos: Dude, this is awesome!!! You three are like the Mystery Trio!!!

Dipper: Don't call us that.

You, Dipper, and Mabel: *pack some things before going outside to see Stan taking out a coffin from his car's trunk*

Stan: Hey, give me a hand with this coffin, will ya? I'm doing a memorial service for wax Stan, something small but classy.

Dipper: Sorry, Grunkle Stan, but we've got a big break in the case.

Mabel: Break in the case!!!

You: We're heading into town to interrogate a suspect.

Mabel: *takes the axe from Dipper's bag* We have an axe!!! Reek, reek, reek!!!

Stan: Seems like the kind of thing a responsible parent wouldn't want you doing. ...good thing I'm an uncle! Avenge me, kids, AVENGE ME!!!!!!

You: *turn into a phoenix and land on Dipper's hat*

Dipper: What are you doing?

You: I'm tired, I'll just chill here.

Mabel: *holds in a laugh*

Dipper: *sigh*

I could tell Dipper was annoyed by my choice of transportation which made me grow a smirk. Anyways, we got there and his at the alleyway beside it. Why? I don't know.

You: This is the place.

Dipper: Got the fake IDs?

Mabel: *gives three ID cards to Dipper*

Dipper: *looks at Mabel with an Are You Serious? look*

You: Can I see them?

Dipper: *gives you the ID cards*

You: *burn the fake ID cards* We won't need them. *walk over to the guard*

Dipper: *whispers* (y/n), wait!!! *runs after you followed by Mabel*

You: What up, Tats?!?

Tattoos: Hey (y/n), how're you doing?!?

You: Eh, same old same old. Is Dan around? We need to talk to him.

Tattoos: Yep, just installed some new strength game and he's testing it out.

You: Thanks. Hey, we're still doing the pool competition tomorrow, right?

Tattoos: Of course, same time as always?

You: You know it! *enter the place followed by the twins* Hey everyone!!!

Everyone: Hey (y/n)!!!

Dipper: Wha- How-?!?

You: I used hung out here sometimes before I moved in with you guys. And don't worry, they might seem tough but they're just big old softies.

Dipper: Still, let's just try to blend in.

Mabel: You got it, Dipping Sauce!!!

You: *nod at Dipper to follow you, then walk over to Manly Dan who's playing some strength game* Hey Manly Dan!

Manly Dan: Hey (y/n)!

You: Is it ok if we ask you some questions?

Manly Dan: Sure! *growls as he continues to play*

Dipper: Where were you last night?

Manly Dan: Punching the clock!!!

Dipper: You were at work?

Manly Dan: No, I was punching that clock!!! *points at a broken clock outside*

Dipper: Ten o'clock, the time of the murder...

You: *take the axe out of Dipper's axe* Put your lumberjack skills to the test. What do you know about this axe?

Manly Dan: All I know is that I would never use that axe!!!

You: How come?

Manly Dan: It's left handed!!! I only use my right hand!!! The manly hand!!! *rips out the arm of the game and beats it up with the arm*

Tyler: *walks over* Get'm, get'm!

Dipper: Left handed...

You: Thanks for your time, Dan! Tell Wendy we said hi!

You and Dipper: *walk over to Mabel who's playing (that weird origami fate paper game)*

Mabel and Guy: Three, four, five, six!

Mabel: *gasps slowly* Your wife is gonna be beautiful...!!!

Guy: Yes!!!

Dipper: Mabel, big break in the case!!!

You, Dipper, and Mabel: *run outside*

Dipper: *makes a list* It's a left handed axe. These are all our suspects. Manly Dan is right handed. That means all we gotta do is find our left hand suspect and we've got our killer!

Mabel: Oh man!!! We are on fire today!!!

You: *raise an eyebrow at Mabel*

Dipper: Let's find that murderer!!!

We spent all day going to all the people of Gravity Falls. All which turned out to be right handed. All except the last one. The twins were convinced that the last person was the killer, but I had some doubts. Though I decided to just go with it. We were at the suspect's house, Blubs and Durland now with us.

Blubs: You kids better be right about this, or you won't here the end of it.

Dipper: The evidence is irrefutable!

Mabel: It's so irrefutable!!!

Durland: I'm gonna have to use my mouth stick!!!

Blubs: Ready, little fella?!?

Blubs and Durland: *poke each ither with the sticks*

Dipper: On three! One, two, -

Durland: *kicks down the door*

Blubs: Nobody move!!! This is a raid!!!

Toby: *falls off his chair* What is this?!? Some sort of raid?!?

Dipper: Toby Determined, you're under arrest for the murder of the wax body of Grunkle Stan!

Mabel: You have the right to remain impressed with our awesome detective work!!!

Dipper and Mabel: *high five each other, then look at you expectingly*

You: *look away worriedly*

Toby: Gobbling goose feathers, I don't understand!

Dipper: Then allow me to explain. You were hoping that Grunkle Stan's new attraction would be the story that saved your failing newspaper. But when the show was a flop, you decided to go out and make your own headline. But you were sloppy, and all the clues pointed to a shabby shoe reporter who was caught left handed.

Mabel: Toby Determined, you're yesterday's news. *throws away the newspaper*

Toby: Boy, you're little knees must be sore. For jumping to conclusions! Ha-cha-cha! I had nothing to do with that murder.

Dipper: I knew it!!! Wait-

Dipper and Mabel: *in murmurs* Wha- what, what?

Mabel: Could you repeat?

Blubs: Then where were you the night of the break in?

Toby: *hesitates, but shows you all a video of him taking out a cardboard Shandra Jimenez and starts to kiss it*

All but Toby: *make disgusted noises*

Blubs: Time stamp confirms: Toby, you're off the hook, you freak of nature.

Toby: Hurray!!!

Dipper: But... but it has to be him!!! Check the axe for fingerprints!

Blubs: *checks for fingerprints* No prints at all.

Dipper: No prints?!?

Durland: Hey I got a headline for ya. City kids waste everyone's time.

Blubs, Durland, and Toby: *laugh*

Dipper and Mabel: *look away in embarrassment*

You: *look at them sympathetically*

Toby: Boy, I'd be pretty embarrassed if I was you three!!!

You: *create a fireball* Shut it unless you want to end up as the marshmallow for the next campfire.

We went back to the shack. Stan had already prepared the whole memorial, and the twins, Soos, and I were there.

Stan: Kids, Soos, lifeless wax figures, thank you all for coming. Some people might say it's wrong for a man to love a wax replica of himself!

Soos: They're wrong!!!

Stan: Easy, Soos. Wax Stan, I hope you're picking pockets in wax heaven. I'm sorry, I got glitter in my eyes!!! *runs away crying*

Soos: *runs after Stan crying*

You: Well, that's over. I'm gonna get myself a drink, brb. *turn phoenix and fly out*

(I'm writing this in the twins' perspective even though it's still (y/n)'s POV, just deal with it)

Dipper: *sigh* Those cops were right about me...!

Mabel: Dipper, we've come so far. We can't give up now!

Dipper: *walks to stands next to wax Stan's coffin* But I considered everything! The weapon, the motive, the clues! *sighs, then notices something in wax Stan's shoe* Wax Stan's shoe has a hole in it.

Mabel: All the wax guys have that. It's where the pool thingy attaches to their stand dealy.

Dipper: Wait a minute, what has holes in its shoes and no fingerprints?!? Mabel, the murderers are-!!!

???: Standing right behind you.

Dipper and Mabel: *see all the wax figures (except wax Stan) come to life*

Dipper: Wax Sherlock Holmes! Wax Shakespeare! Wax Coolio?!?

Coolio: W'sup Holmes.

Wax Lizzie Borden: *takes the axe away from Mabel*

Mabel: Oh my gosh, oh my gosh...!

Holmes: Congratulations my two amateur sleuths, you've unburied the truth, and now we're going to bury you.

Wax Figures: *walk closer to Dipper and Mabel*

Holmes: Bravo Dipper Pines, you've discovered our little secret. *pulls out wax Stan's head* Applaud everyone, applaud sarcastically!

Wax Figures: *clap*

Holmes: No, that sounds too sincere. Slow clap.

Wax Figures: *clap slower*

Holmes: Nice and condescending.

Dipper: But... how is this possible?!? You're made of wax!

Mabel: Are you... magic?!?

Holmes: *laughing* Are we magic? She wants to know if we're magic! *punches the area next to you as you move* We're cursed!!!

Wax Figures: Cursed!!!

Holmes: Cursed to come to life whenever the moon is waxing. Your uncle bought us many years ago at a garage sale.

Coolio: A haunted garage sale, son!

~flashback~

Seller: I must warn you, these statues come at a terrible price.

Stan: *looks at the price tag* Twenty dollars?!? I'll just take'm when you're not looking.

Seller: What?

Stan: I said I was gonna rob ya.

~end of flashback~

Holmes: And so the Mystery Shack wax collection was born. By day we would be the playthings of men.

Coolio: But when you're uncle went to sleep, we would rule the night.

Holmes: It was a charmed life for us cursed beings. That is, until you're uncle closed up shop. We've been waiting ten years to get our revenge on Stan for locking us away. But we got the wrong guy.

Dipper: So you were trying to murder Grunkle Stan for real?!?

Mabel: You were right all along Dipper, wax people are creepy!

Holmes: Enough!!! Now that you know our secret, you must die.

Dipper and Mabel: *back away eventually bumping into a table as the wax figures walk to them*

Mabel: What do we do?!? What do we do?!?

Dipper: I dunno!!!

Wax Genghis Khan: *is about to attack the twins*

Dipper and Mabel: AHHH!!!

Wax Genghis Khan: *starts to melt as a hole is burned into his stomach* Ahh..!

You: I should've done that since I first saw you all.

Holmes: Get her!!!

Wax Figures: *run to attack you*

You: *turn completely on fire* Let's dance, shall we? *start fighting the wax figures that come your way, mostly burning have their bodies and some limbs*

Mabel: C'mon, Dipper, we have to help (y/n)!!!!

Dipper: But what can we do?!? *notices some artificial candles and takes one, then gives another to Mabel*

I tried my best to keep the freaky wax figures away from the twins. Unfortunately the two of them came to help me and got their attention.

If you're wondering why I haven't just burned them all at once it's because I might hurt the twins and burn down the shack. And I can't have that.

As time passed I could feel my energy drifting away slowly, but there were still some wax figures left and I was determined to eliminate them all. I stood by myself to try and catch my breath when...

Dipper: *cuts wax Groucho in half* Joke on you, Groucho!!!

Groucho: I've heard about a cutting remark but this is ridiculous. Hey, why is there nothing in my hand? *falls*

Half Melted Wax Genghis Khan: *runs to attack Dipper*

You: *stand in front Dipper and completely burn Genghis Khan as you pant for air*

Dipper: Thanks.

You: Don't mention it.

Mabel: Guys, watch out!!!

Holmes: *puts wax Stan's head on a rhino horn and takes out a sword* Alright, let's get this taking care of.

You: *try to burn Holmes but realize that you don't have enough energy* No!

Holmes: *kicks you far into the wall*

You: *hit the wall harshly and fall to the ground*

Dipper: (y/n)!!!!!!

Holmes: *knocks Dipper's artificial candle out of his hands*

Mabel: Catch!!!!! *throws a poker with a burnt tip at Dipper who catches it*

Dipper's POV

Wax Sherlock Holmes starts to follow me out and up the Mystery Shack. I tried my best to fight him off, but all I did was getting myself into tough spots.

Eventually I led him out the window, and while fighting I accidentally knocked down the S of Mystery Shack. I was able to climb across the roof and hide behind the chimney. Thinking I was safe, I let out a sigh of relief when he kicked me gut making me fall close to the edge.

Holmes: Any last words? *raises his sword to attack*

Dipper: Um... you got any sunscreen?

Holmes: Got any-? What? *notices his hands starting to melt, then sees the sun rising as he lets out a gasp* ...no.

Dipper: You know, letting me lead you outside? Probably not your sharpest decisions.

Holmes: Outsmarted by a child in short pants?!? No!!! *starts to melt away* Fiddlesticks!!! Humbugs!!! Tiiter, total kerfufle!!! Butter hullabaloo!!! *everything but his face melts*

Dipper: Case closed! *claps the dust off his hands making him sneeze (adorably)*

Holmes: *laughs* You sneeze like a kitten! Those policemen were right, you're adorable! Adorable!!! *falls to the ground completely melted*

Dipper: ...eew. *gasp* (y/n)!!!

I ran downstairs as fast as I could to see Mabel holding one of (y/n)'s arms around her shoulders helping (y/n) stand.

You: Hey, you're ok!

Dipper: Yeah, but are you?!?

You: Aw, you do care about me!

Dipper: *gives you an Are You Serious? look*

You: *push down his hat playful* I'm fine, Pine. Just used too much energy, I'll be good as new by tomorrow morning. *smile warmly*

Dipper: *smiles back*

Mabel: *looks from you to Dipper to you with a smirk* Whoops! *pushes you harshly towards Dipper*

You: Whoa-!

Dipper: *catches you before falling, his face now turning a bit pink* ...

You: ... Mabel, what the heck?!?

Mabel: Sorry, I was getting tired!

You: *eye roll* Anyways, I think I can stand now. *pull away from Dipper and wobble a bit at first, but gain your balance*

Mabel: *looks to the side with an annoyed expression, then back at Dipper with a smile* And hey!!! You solved the mystery after all!!!

Dipper: *gets wax Stan's head from the rhino's horn* Well, I couldn't have done it without my sidekick!

Mabel: No offense, Dipper, but you're the sidekick.

Dipper: What? Says who? A-are people saying that? Have you heard that?

Stan: *walks in* HOT BELGIAN WAFFLES?!? What happened to my parlor?!?!?!?!? (y/n)?!?!?

You: Hey!!! ...although it was a bit my fault.

Mabel: Your wax figures turned out to be evil so we fought them to the death!!!

Dipper: I decapitated Larry King.

Stan: *laughs* You kids and your imaginations!

You: On the bright side though, look what we found!

Dipper: *throws wax Stan's head at Stan who catches it*

Stan: My head!!!! *laughs* I missed this guy!!!! You done good, kids!!!! Alright, line up for some affectionate noogying!!!

Mabel: Uh...

You: Um...

Dipper: I'm not so sure about that, is there any other way-?

Stan: *noogies you three as you all laugh*

You, Dipper, Mabel, and Stan: *here police sirens and look out the window*

Blubs: Solve the case yet, boy? I'm so confident you're gonna say no that I'm gonna take a long slow sip from my cup of coffee. *starts to drink his coffee*

Dipper: Actually the answer is yes!

Blubs: *stutters before spitting his coffee on Durland's face*

Durland: AHHHH!!!! *spits his coffee on Blubs's face*

Blubs: AHHHHH!!!! *spits his coffee on Durland's face*

Durland: AHHHH!!!! *spits his coffee on Blubs's face*

Blubs: *drives away as the two complain about the coffee*

You, Dipper, Mabel, and Stan: *laugh*

Stan: They got scolded!!!

Dipper: So did you get rid off all the wax figures?

Mabel: I'm ninety nine percent sure!!!

Dipper: Good enough for me!!!

Thanks for reading!!! And before I leave, yesterday SagePlayzz asked me to draw something for her, so...

Here ya go, Sage! I hope you like it! Anyways, 'till next time!

❤️❤️❤️