Ep.3: Golf War
Your POV
Not gonna lie, even if I already knew Pine liked Wendy for a long time, it still hurt a lot to hear him say those words back at the bunker. I'll get over it, I just need time.
It had been a few days since then, and at the time, Pine and I were sitting on the living room couch watching tv and eating cereal, for we were bored out of our minds!!!
Stan: *enters holding a pan* Who wants Stancakes?!? They're like normal pancakes, but they have some of my hair on'm.
You: Pass.
Dipper: I'll pass too.
Mabel: *bursts through the door* It's here!!!!! *squeals as she runs around the room* Oh, it's here it's here it's here it's here!!! I've been waiting all morning and it's finally here!!! The Gravity Falls Gossiper accepted my article about summer fashion tips for squirrels!!! My picture is gonna be the newspaper!!! *pulls out the newspaper* Check it!!!
Stan: "Pacifica Northwest declares v-necks the look of the season." What am I looking at here?
Mabel: *looks at the journal* Wha-wha-WHAT?!?
Dipper: Looks like someone bought their way the front page.
Stan: Is it legal for a child to wear so much makeup?
You: Clowns should be scared of her.
Mabel: Ugh, Pacifica. She always ruins everything!
You: Don't worry, M, nobody reads newspapers anymore.
Soos: *bursts through the door* Dude, v-neck season is upon us!!! Who wants to help me get ahead of the fashion curve?!? I'm taking it one step further, with the w-neck!!! *starts to cut his shirt* Must. Follow. Newspaper!
Mabel: *sadly drinks a cup of orange juice* I need something to get my mind off this...
Announcer: *tv* Looking for a distraction from your horrible life?!?
Mabel: Why yes!!!
Announcer: Victory!!! Honor!!! Destiny!!! Mutton!!! These old-timey sounding words are alive and well at the Gravity Falls Royal Discount Putt Hutt!!! No mutton available at the Snack Shop.
Dipper: Hey, Mabel, you love mini golf!!! *takes Mabel's album and shows you and Stan pictures of young Mabel mini golfing* She's been amazing at it since we were kids!!! What do you say, Mabel? We've had a stressful couple of days, how about we take a break, huh?
Stan: Would kicking all our butts at mini golf cheer you up?
Mabel: Maybe a little.
Dipper: C'mon, Mabel!!! *does a heroic pose* Victory!!!
Mabel: Honor!!!
You: Destiny!!!
Soos: Mutton!!!
And so we all got dressed and went to the Putt Hutt!!!!!
Mabel: Ah, mini golf!!! The sport of many champions!!!
Dipper: The grass is fake but the fun is real!!!
You: There's something here for everyone!!!
So we start to golf. I have to admit, I suck at it. Mabel was the only one who was good at this. The rest of us all sucked. After a while...
Dipper: *prepares to hit the ball, then swings the golf pick which makes the ball slowly fall into the pond beside it*
Mabel: Don't worry, bro!!! You're still a *slaps a sticker on Dipper's cheek* ext-roar-dinary!!!
You: *snort and laugh*
Dipper: ...I'll take what I can get.
Mabel: *gets ready to hit the ball* Do the hip wiggle, and...!!! *hits the ball which goes through the whole course and does a hole in one* Yes!!!
You: Woooo!!!
Stan: Holy smokes!!! Someone in our family actually has talent!!!
Dipper: Grunkle Stan, you ain't seen nothing yet!
After many many many many many many stages and Mabel winning then all, we were at the stage. Everyone was surrounding us, waiting for Mabel to hit the ball.
Dipper: Guys, this is amazing! If Mabel gets a hole in one here she'll beat her all time high score!!!
Mabel: *concentrates on the ball, then hits the ball you goes through most of the course but takes a turn around the whole* Ah nuts!!! *throws her club on the ground in frustration*
Everyone: *leaves to do their own thing*
Stan: *picks up the ball* Ah, don't worry about it kid, the thing's random.
Soos: Yeah, besides for Bermuda Triangle how mini golf works is the world's greatest mystery.
Stan: As far as I'm concerned, you're still better than anyone else in Gravity-
You, Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and Stan: *gasp at the sight of a ball enter the hole*
Pacifica: Oh, would you look at that~! I didn't know it was hobos golf free day.
Mabel: Pacifica!
Pacifica: Well, if it isn't the Pines family! *pointing at each of you* Fat, old, ugly, lame, bracers!
Stan: Guys, would it be wrong to punch a child?
Dipper: I've got this. Hey, Pacifica, how's that whole "Your family being fraud" thing working out for ya?
Pacifica: Great, actually!!! That's the thing about money, it makes problems go away!
You: *whisper* Wish it could make her go away.
Mabel: Well, it can't buy you skill!!! You walked into the game of a mini golf champion!!!
Pacifica: Hah, Sergei!!! *snaps her fingers*
Sergei: *walks next to Pacifica*
Pacifica: This is Sergei, my trainer.
Sergei: The sportolympics had mini golf once. I took gold!!! *shows a gold medal*
Pacifica: So if you don't mind getting out if the way of the professionals. *hits a ball which does a hole in one*
Mabel: *stares at Pacifica in shock*
Pacifica: *gives Sergei her club before taking off her gloves and giving then to Sergei* Enjoy second place. Give her a hand, folks!
Everyone: *claps for Mabel*
Pacifica: *starts to walk away with a smirk on her face*
Mabel: Oh yeah?!? Well, I-I want a rematch, you- you WALKING ONE DIMENSIONAL BLEACHED BLONDE VALLEY GIRL STEREOTYPE!!!
Everyone: *gasp*
Pacifica: *turns around, her face filled with anger* Like, let's do this.
It suddenly gets really stormy and starts to rain. The 'king' of the park was driving his golf cart through saying that the park was closed because of the sudden weather change. Mabel and Pacifica decide to do the rematch late at night after the park close, then leave. We go to a Mexican restaurant nearby and sat down at a table waiting for it to be nighttime.
Mabel: *opens her mouth as she stares out into the rain*
Dipper: *places a nacho in Mabel's mouth who eats it*
Mabel: *opens her mouth again as Dipper places another nacho in her mouth, then she eats it and lets out a sigh* It's time to scratch mini golf off my talents lists...
You: Aw, don't give up, Mabel.
Dipper: Yeah, if you beat her at this she could never rag on you again! Imagine it!!!
Mabel: *stares off into the ceiling and after a few seconds she looks at all of you, then she stands up on the table* You're right, guys!!! I just need to practice a little more before midnight!!!
Stan: Go to the golf court after dark, you say? I don't know, we'd have to break in and- just kidding, let's break in!!!
We broke in. The passed hours Mabel spent practicing her mini golfing skills while Stan and Soos stayed in the car. She tried to complete the last stage, but no matter how much she tried the ball golf ball wouldn't enter the hole.
Mabel: Darn!!! Poop head darn!!!
Dipper: Ugh, I don't get it! What's wrong with this hole?!?
You: *hear strange sounds coming from inside the windmill, then place your ear and hear the sound louder* Guys, come check this out.
Dipper: *places his ear on the windmill, then gasps slightly*
Mabel: What? What is it?
Dipper: *whispers* Grab your club!
Mabel: *grabs a club*
You: *creat a small fireball*
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *walk to the windmill cautiously*
Dipper: *takes off a wooden plank letting you all see what's inside*
Little Creatures: *do their own little things, then see you and the twins and gasp*
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *gasp at the sight of these tiny tiny creatures with golf balls for heads*
Little Creatures: AHHHHH!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: AHHHHH!!!
Little Creatures: AHHHHH!!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *as they raise their clubs to attack, you expanding your fireball* AHHHHH!!!!
Little Creatures: *all hide together* AHHHHH!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: ...
Little Creature: *breathes heavily* We good, we good?
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *slowly nod still shocked* ...
Little Creature: *clears his throat* Alright, then! Hi, hello! I'm Franz and welcome to our home!
Dipper: What is this...?!?
Mabel: Are you guys tiny humans or enormous mini humans?
Franz: *chuckles* Neither, we're Lilliputtians!!! Lilla- Lilla- the name makes more sense written out than spoken. And we control the balls!!! Behold!!!
The little creature known as Franz turned around which made the windmill open revealing everything that the ball goes through to get to the end. It was actually really fascinating!!!
Mabel: That's incredible!!!
Dipper: And so needlessly complicated!!!
You: And that's coming from you.
Franz: Aw, shucks, it's only our lifelong passion! Would you like us to elaborate through song?!?
You: Eh, we're good.
Little Creatures: Aww...
Franz: What are you huge-lings doing here anyways?
Mabel: We kind of have to play this golf tournament against my rival, Pacifica.
Little Creatures: *start to murmur the word Rival*
Franz: Oh, we know all about rivals.
???: Put a clog in it, ya windmill lovers!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *turn around to see the pirate stage filled with many pirate Lilliputtians*
Pirate Leader: These frilly bottom popinjays are terrible at controlling the balls! We are the ball masters, says I!
???: Shut your mouths, you show-boating pirates!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *turn around to see the Eiffel Tower filled with french Lilliputtians*
French Leader: Everyone knows the Eiffel Tower hole is zeh best!
???: Stay you comments, you churlish frenchmen!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *see the castle filled with knight Lilliputtians*
Head Knight: None control the balls better than the knights of- *notices the graffiti on his castle* Wiener castle? Who wrote this?
Franz: We'll settle who's hole is best!!! Attack!!!
The Lilla- lil... the creatures all started to battle, us in the middle of it. Lucky for us, everything was super tiny and didn't really affect us. It was... actually really funny.
You and Dipper: *laugh*
Dipper: These guys are a riot!!!
You: I know, fight?!?
Mabel: Guys, guys, calm down!!! You're fighting is inevitably adorable!!!
Franz: *dazed* Adorable we are, huge-ling, but our tale less so. Every hole in the park thinks they are superior. From the cowboys in the east, to the grimy miners of the south. If only there was some way to decide which side is best! With maybe an award, or like a trophy, I don't know.
French Leader: But Franz, look!!! *points at Mabel's golden sticker which says U Da Best*
Lilliputtians: *start to murmur about the sticker*
Franz: The sticker, the sticker could decide!!!
French Leader: It does zay zeh best on it!!!
Head Knight: Decide for us, huge-ling! Choose which mini kingdom to give the sticker to and end our war!
Lilliputtians: *cheer*
Mabel: Uh... I dunno, guys, I'm not sure I want to get involved in your weird mini blood feud-
Dipper: Psst, Mabel, this is perfect! These guys control the course! Just tell them we'll give the sticker to whichever group does a better job of helping us win!
You: I'm not so sure about this...
Mabel: Me neither... I wanna beat Pacifica but doesn't this seem like cheating...?
Dipper: Pacifica's rich, Mabel, she cheating at life.
You: *sigh*
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *climb on top of the castle so all the Lilliputtians could see and hear you*
Dipper: *blows a tiny horn, then gives it to one of the knights* Thanks, man.
Mabel: People of the eighteen holes!!! We're going to have a game of mini golf!!! And whoever does the best job helping me win gets the sticker!!!
Pirate Leader: It'll be us, lads! Not these tulip munchers!
Franz: I will not be insulted by a man with no depth reception wearing earrings!!!
Mabel: Just remember: as long as you're helping me, no fighting.
Lilliputtian Leaders: *give you all innocent smiles*
Midnight came. Pacifica came inside. The lights turned on one by one until thy reached Mabel who had a cocky expression and a sassy pose.
Mabel: Looking for someone?
Pacifica: Waiting in the dark, not creepy at all. Seriously though, I don't know why you bothered to come! Unless you got something up you sleeve.
Mabel: Oh, I guess you could say we got a little something~ *nudges you and Dipper* Right? Right? *pushes in the Lilliputtian that popped his head*
Dipper and Mabel: *laugh awkwardly*
You: *whisper to yourself* Oh boy
Sergei: Eighteen holes, standard rules: winner lives in glory, loser wallows in eternal shame. *points a gun up to the sky* On your mark, get set, go!!! *shoots*
Mabel and Pacifica started their tournament. The creatures made sure Pacifica lost and the Mabel would always get a hole in one. Before we knew it, we were in hole seventeen.
Pacifica: *sees Mabel's ball enter the hole, then she throws her club in frustration*
Sergei: *catches the club*
Pacifica: Sergei, soda, now!!! *leaves with Sergei*
Mabel: *raises a rock which reveals many miner Lilliputtians inside* Ok, guys, that was badonkukous!!!
Dipper: Hey hey, little high fives, everyone, little high fives all around.
Minor Lilliputtians: *high five Dipper*
Mabel: I don't want to call it our early, but I think the miners might have one of these in their future~! *points at her sticker*
Miner Lilliputtians: *cheer*
Mabel: *puts the rock back in place*
Dipper: I can't wait to see the look on Pacifica's when we win. I'm thinking it'll be like- *does a disgusted expression* Ugh! You know how she does that? *does the same expression* Ugh!
You: Pine, that is the best impression of Pacifica I have ever seen.
Mabel: Guys, is it bad that I feel good about her feeling bad?
Dipper: Oh, just enjoy your victory, Mabel. Trust me, Pacifica will be fine.
Pacifica: AHHHHHH!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *see Pacifica tied down by ropes on the bottom of the windmill*
You: Or not!!!
Pacifica: What's going on here?!? Let me go!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: AHHH!!!
Lilliputtian: *pops out of Mabel's sleeve* AHHH!!! What did I miss?
Pacifica: Let me go, you creeps!!!
Franz: Welcome, guys, welcome!!! I can tell you're loving this, right? Right? No?
Mabel: What're you guys doing?!?
Dipper: This wasn't part if the deal, tiny dutchman!!!
Franz: Ok, so we saw you were favoring the miners and we figured: what's better than beating Pacifica? *blows raspberries* Killing her!!! Right?!?
Pacifica: As if!!! I'm calling my parents!!! Where's my phone!!! *sees Lilliputtians messing with her phone* Hey, HEY!!!
Franz: So how about it, huge-ling?!? Who's da best now?!?
Pirate Leader: Not so fast, land lovers!!!
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *turn to see Sergei tied up with a rope on the plank*
Pirate Leader: If you're going to play dirty, so are we!!! Now give us the sticker or he walks the plank!!!
French Leader: No, give us ze sticker!!!
Lilliputtians: *argue louder and louder*
Mabel: ENOUGH!!!
Lilliputtians: *gasp*
Mabel: You know what?!? No one gets the sticker!!!
French Lilliputtian: Sacre-booooo!!!
Lilliputtians: BOOOO!!!
Mabel: No, no, nuh-uh, no booing, stop, no, no one gets the sticker cuz you're all being jerks!!! I mean why can't you just get along?!?
Random Lilliputtian: Because we hate each other!!!
Pirate Leader: That's kinda how rivalries work, lass.
Mabel: Well then maybe... *looks at Pacifica* Maybe rivalries are dumb!!! Maybe you don't settle them with petty competitions!!! Maybe the only way to be "da best" is by ending the fighting and working together!!! *crumbles up the sticker and eats it*
Lilliputtians: *gasp, then murmur*
Random Lilliputtian: It's all so clear!!!
Franz: If we work together...
Pirate Leader: Then we can cut open and get the stickerrrr!!!!
Lilliputtians: *cheer*
French Leader: Get zeh girl!!! Slice her open!!!
Lilliputtians: *surround you and the twins*
Mabel: Uh, you guys aren't appreciating the lesson here!!!
Lilliputtian: *pull the lever which causes the platform where Pacifica was at and started taking her to the fast moving windmill*
Pacifica: AHHH!!! HEEEELP!!!
Dipper: We gotta get out of here!!!
Mabel: I have to save Pacifica first!!! *starts to climb a light pole with a golf club in her mouth and goes to Pacifica*
Lilliputtians: *follow Mabel*
Sergei: Ah, Mr. Dipper and Miss (y/n)!!!
Dipper: Don't freak out, man!!! The water's shallow, there's literally no way to drown!!!
Sergei: *falls face first into the water*
Dipper: ...seriously?
You: *snicker*
After helping Sergei, we manage to get a golf cart and pick up Mabel and Pacifica. We had a lot of dangerous obstacles, but somehow managed to escape, though we lost Sergei. Pacifica didn't care. We barely made it, destroying the golf cart in the process.
You, Dipper, Mabel, and Pacifica: *get out of the golf cart*
Franz: *from inside the Putt Hutt* Stay out, stay out you dumb huge-lings!!!
Lilliputtians: *started to throw stuff over the wall*
Pacifica: What did you say, you little trolls?!? I will sue you!!! I will sue you and I will own you!!! *breathes heavily, then turns around* You three!!! I dunno what you did or what's going on, but if you think just because you saved my life I-!!!
Mabel: *gives Pacifica a sticker that says I a-paw-logize*
Mabel: I'm sorry, Pacifica... We shouldn't have cheated, you totally would've beat me fair and square...
Pacifica: ... *puts on the story* You're jut lucky this sticker looks fantastic on me.
Stan: *drives in*
You, Dipper, and Mabel: *get in the car*
Mabel: *looks at you and Dipper expectedly*
You and Dipper: *slightly shake your head*
Mabel: *looks at Pacifica and waves* Hey, your parents aren't here!!! Want a ride home?!?
Pacifica: Haha, please, as if I'd ride in your- *realizes that it's raining on her*
The car ride to her mansion was long and awkward, at least for me and Pine. Mabel and Pacifica talked a bit, and I think she's starting to "warm up". We finally got to her gates. Pacifica left the car and turned us.
Pacifica: Thanks for the ride or whatever. Oh, and Mabel, um... I can't believe I'm saying this but I had fun. And tell your servant I like his w-neck. *starts walking away*
Soos: Yes!!!
Dipper: So, are you two like friends now?
Mabel: I think we made some progress! The important thing to remember is that at the end of the day she's just an ordinary kid like us!!!
Pacifica: *opens the gates revealing a big roundabout with fountains, peacocks, fireworks, and decorations for her victory*
You: Should've charged her for that taco.
Mabel: Agreed.
We got all got home and immediately went to sleep. There goes another adventure.
Thanks for reading!!! 'Till next time!!!
❤️❤️❤️
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: Truyen247.Pro