Rubbing the crusts of slumber from her eyes, Malawashina yawned into her hand before she reached down to trace her fingers along the empty space beside her on the mattress. She felt no warmth there and turning her head she looked down to the empty space with doleful eyes.
The Pharaoh had not shared her bed for almost two moons. It was the same story for her harem sisters. Apart from the births of Princesses Sutererey and Tiyamun's children, none had seen him but in passing. Now, he rarely entered the harem but to see the Queen. Nefertari herself had not left her chambers since the birth of their new prince, Meryatum.
All knew that the new prince was healthy and spirited, as were the two new princesses, but the same could not be said for the Lady of the Two Lands.
All within the palace understood the trauma she had faced and thus sympathised, but sympathy could not overshadow the ever consuming uncertainty for none but their Sovereign had been allowed audience with her since that day.

Sighing, Malawashina flung her legs over the side of her bed, her head swooning slightly from her drowsiness. A churning in her stomach brought stinging bile into her throat, but she forced it down as she regained her countenance. As she moved to her vanity, she could not help but feel heavier with each step. No sooner did she seat herself did the door creak open as Princess Merytra let herself in quietly.
"Oh, Mala!" Merytra exclaimed with surprise, "I did not expect you to be awake so early!"
"My sleep has been restless of late," Malawashina yawned once more. "Have you come to wake me?" She managed an amused grin.
Merytra chuckled, "Yes and no," she answered innocently. "I know that you have not been feeling yourself for some time, so I wanted to come to cheer you up today from the very moment you wake! Though you are unexpectedly already roused."
"Apologies," Malawashina smiled with appreciation, "Shall I return to bed?"
Merytra laughed heartily at this. "No, no, it is quite alright. I am in fact relieved that you are awake for I did worry you might be in a sour mood if I tried to rouse you before you were ready. Anyway, how are you feeling?"
"I feel strange," Malawashina admitted. "I feel like I have not slept at all and my body feels like it has been weighted down by a boulder."
An expression of concern riddled Merytra's face. "Are you still feeling nauseous?"
"A little," answered Malawashina. "I cannot help but worry for the Queen. I miss her and now, when I am no longer in our husband's graces,  I fret that neither of them will ever forgive me."
Merytra placed a gentle hand upon Malawashina's now quivering shoulder.
"Do not worry. They will forgive you, just give them time. They are still not allowing any of us an audience, either. I have heard that Nefertari is still refusing a wet-nurse to feed Prince Meryatum, and barely allows anyone, even our Pharaoh, to hold him."
"And I am to blame for this..." Malawashina whimpered.
"No, Mala, please stop blaming yourself!" Merytra enveloped her in a warm embrace as she wiped the younger princess' tears that suddenly sprouted in her eyes away with a handkerchief she had hidden within the folds of her dress. "The entire palace knows it was not your fault. Isetnofret should never have provoked you and had Utati attacked. The fault lies entirely on her head and she will be judged for it accordingly. Now, come, let me call for our morning meal." 
Malawashina considered her friend's words, but the longer she thought about them, the more silent they fell and the louder that other voices in her head grew. She should have shown restraint. Her hotheadedness brought shame upon her and her family, her nation.

As Merytra chatted away merrily whilst they ate, Malawashina could not help but feel her thoughts getting more and more clouded, her stomach churning uncomfortably with every bite of the durum cakes and figs that she took. This did not go without notice, and Merytra stopped mid-sentence to look upon her friend with concern.
"Mala? Your complexion has paled. Shall I fetch a physician?"
"I will be fine..." Malawashina gave a weak smile. "The smell of this wine is making me feel nauseous. Is it not spoiled?," she pushed her chalice away in favour of the cup of water Seshen poured instead.
Merytra raised an eyebrow. "There is nothing wrong with the wine. Mala, may I ask you something personal?"
Malawashina forced down a gulp of the water and nodded, "Of course you can."
Merytra composed herself. She knew she did not need to sweeten her words with the younger Princess. "I have noticed that you have not visited the House of Cleansing for a while. With how you have been feeling since before the incident, I am inclined to suspect something... something fantastic, of course."
Malawashina's eyes widened in her dreary state. She had not even thought about such a thing; she had been too preoccupied to do so. "Do you think...?"
"Yes, of course it is possible! Have you not shared the bed with our husband prior to everything? Has he not blessed you with Min's sap while doing so? Oh Mala!" Merytra laughed, causing Malawashina to blush furiously. "Have you felt any pain in your abdomen lately? Tenderness of the breasts and...lower region?"
"I have, actually," Malawashina admitted. "I just suspected my menses was going to grace me. However, I have not heeded the fact that it has not yet arrived. Could it not all be stress?"
"Mala, come now, we all know these conditions are not from stress!" 
"Do you really think I could be...?" Malawashina's eyes welled with tears once more from the prospect.
"Yes! Oh, how wonderful it would be if we could become mothers together!" Merytra clapped her hands excitedly. Malawashina had also almost forgotten that important news - that Merytra was now finally with child.
"Oh, I do truly hope so, Mery!" Malawashina's tone was fervent with enthusiasm despite her lethargy.
"Then," Merytra began as she swallowed the food that was in her mouth, "shall we have you examined by the physicians? We can go to see Utati afterwards as well!"

"And for how long have you been feeling these afflictions, your highness?" The Priestess asked as she gently pressed into Malawashina's stomach.

"I do not recall, exactly," Malawashina answered. "Probably since the incident...? My mind has been so befuddled as of late." Malawashina's voice cracked, stinging tears threatening to fall once more.
"I understand." The Priestess placed a calming touch on her shoulder. "Do not think on any negatives, Princess, for if you are indeed with child, any morose feelings may affect them."
Malawashina gave a weak nod as Merytra rubbed her hand to show her support.
"Please undress yourself so I may examine you."
With the assistance of Merytra and Seshen, she unclothed herself and lay back upon the examining bed as she was instructed.
As the Priestess looked over her body, she did not dare move or speak. Anxiety had taken over. Once the Priestess instructed her to clothe herself once again, Malawashina sat upright on the bed.
"Well, your Highness, I witnessed all tell-tale signs of an early pregnancy. But to be certain, there is one more thing we must do."
"What is it?" Malawashina stammered.
The Priestess walked over to an intricately painted cedar cupboard and opened its carven doors. Pulling out two burlap sacks, both the length of an outstretched hand, she brought them to the bed.
Malawashina noticed both Merytra and Seshen grinning with excitement. Raising a curious eyebrow, she turned back to the Priestess.
"What are these?"
"This sack is filled with wheat seeds," the Priestess patted the lighter coloured bag. "And this one here is filled with barley seeds. Place the sacks into a cleaned chamber pot with their tops opened to reveal the seeds and urinate on them daily."
Malawashina's eyes widened at this information, and both Merytra and Seshen began giggling from her surprise.
"Do this for several turns of the sun and no more," the Priestess continued. "Or until the seeds begin to sprout. If the wheat sprouts first, then you are indeed with child and the child shall be a girl. If the barley sprouts first then the child will be a boy. If the seeds do not sprout at all, then unfortunately you are not with child. Come back to see me if your condition worsens and if the seeds begin to sprout," She smiled as she then handed Seshen a small vial.
"This is to help ease your mistress' nausea and return some of her spirit. Give it to her before each meal. Call for me at once if there are any further troubles. Now, Princess Malawashina,"she turned once more to face the Princess.
"Do you have any other concerns that are bothering you?"
Malawashina fidgeted for a moment. She did not wish to pry on the business of others, but her anxiety would not relent on the matter.
"Is our Queen, Nefertari, well? We have heard very little about her as of late and the Pharaoh does not visit any of us anymore."  
"I see," The Priestess furrowed her brow at their predicament. "I can only tell you this, the Queen, in body, is as well as to be expected. However," she paused for a moment before sighing dolefully, "it is like her eternal Ka has departed from her. She permits nigh an audience with the exception of our Sovereign and a few handmaidens and physicians. She refuses the assistance of a wet nurse and she hardly shares words with any of those she allows in her presence. She has become but a husk of who she once was. Alas, we cannot determine when or if she will return to us as she had once been. The birth of the Prince had been a grievous one and we do not know if she will be able to bear any more children. This also weighs on her greatly. All we can do is give our beloved Majesty time."

"I hope, in time, she will forgive me." Malawashina lowered her gaze.
"Fret not now," Merytra started with an uplifting tone, "and let us focus on your potential future! Shall we go see Utati and inform her? "
"Utati is in the House of Cleansing for her menses has started. I am afraid that you may not be able to see her for several cycles of Ra's journey, especially now that you may be with child." The Priestess bowed her head as she spoke.
Malawashina felt like a comforting breeze had swept over her as a deep sense of relief filled her heart. Utati was not with child. But then her heart weighed like stone at the sudden realisation. Had she been jealous of her younger friend's potential pregnancy before her own? Downturning her eyes, she felt a sudden stab of nausea in her stomach from the guilt.
"Malawashina, you have gone pallid, are you alright?" Merytra asked as she placed a hand on the younger princess' shoulder in concern.
Malawashina dared not share her true feelings, complicated and confusing as they were,  and simply nodded. Taking a sip of the water the Priestess handed her, she asked, "My Lady of Sekhmet, may I ask you one small favour?"
"Of course you may, your Highness." The Priestess replied as she tidied up her instruments of examination.
"Would you please keep my visit a secret? I do not wish for anyone to know until I am certain. For our Sovereign, our Pharaoh, I would like to inform him myself, if I may, upon confirmation."
The Priestess smiled at this and nodded, "Of course," she answered warmly. "But if your condition declines, I will need to inform his Majesty."
"Understood," Malawashina sighed, thinking back on their last encounter.
"Some part of me wishes things would go awry just so I will have an excuse to see him."
The Priestess glanced at her from the corner of her eye, her countenance somewhat disapproving. "We pray that no ill come upon you, Princess. I am sure that all within the palace, including his Majesty, will be devastated if such were to come to pass."
"Forgive me," Malawashina lowered her eyes once more, her emotions encroaching on her once again. "I miss him terribly."