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05

The picture depicted a vineyard painted in brilliant greens and earthy browns. Pink, red, yellow, and orange tones blended into a perfect sunset. In Nina's mind, the image faded, replaced by a more familiar one. There was no scent of jasmine or spices. No faint music playing somewhere nearby. No hallway with cream colored walls or the clacking of shoes on hardwood floors. No green eyes staring intently back at Nina.

Just the autumn woods and the river. It was there for a second and gone in the next. Once it was gone, Nina felt a chill run through her.

For that one small moment in which the painting of the forest flashed through her mind, Nina thought of it as nothing more than a recollection pulled from her own memories. It made her wonder just how deeply ingrained in her mind Alice's memories were.

The thought was a fleeting one, but it was enough to disturb Nina. With a shaking hand, she raised her cup to her mouth and took a sip of the hot drink. It was a bit of normalcy—just a cup of coffee in a cozy shop—but it helped to ground Nina. She still avoided looking back at the painting on the wall.

When someone finally approached her table, Nina thought it a welcome distraction. She smiled faintly, hoping any unease she still felt was properly hidden, and looked up at the man who she'd agreed to meet there.

He smiled at Nina as he took a seat, dimples appearing as his lips curved up and brown eyes sparkling.

"You're late," Nina said, setting her cup down and not sounding the least bit reproachful. She'd long ago learned not to rely on Ben's poor time management abilities.

"Sorry, traffic was a nightmare," he said,sounding just the slightest bit frustrated, but his eyes lighting up at the drink that waited in front of him. "Makes me wonder why I ever moved to the city."

Nina's lips quirked up just the slightest bit at the usual complaint. Benjamin Valle was an easy going man on most accounts, but big city traffic would forever be his pet peeve. It was something Nina had learned well enough in the year they'd dated. Still, he was a good man, a good friend—something few could say about their ex. He hummed appreciatively when he tasted his drink. Nina might have forgotten many things, but she still remembered how Ben—an avid lover of coffee—liked his daily caffeine fix.

"How've you been doing?" he asked, eyes flickering from Nina's eyes to the scar just barely visible as it peeked out from Nina's sweater. She made a very conscious effort not to tug at her sleeve of hide her hand beneath the table. "You know, I meant to visit at the hospital. Figured it might not be the best time though."

"It's fine, wouldn't have mattered anyway. I can't even remember anything that happened while I was there." That knowledge might have still bothered Nina, but she knew she had to get used to the idea if she wanted to get over it.

"Maybe it's for the best. Things have really been going to shit lately," Ben said with a shrug.

"I take it work's been rough."

"Pretty much. Everyone at work's going crazy over the Commissioner of the FDA and then we have a whole series of burglaries lately that we're looking into." Ben sighed, leaning back in his seat. Nina had almost forgotten just how demanding Ben's work could be. How much of a toll being an officer took on him, despite him not wanting to admit it. "Then there's the protests. Been a pain with everyone arguing 'bout the memory implant thing."

"Memory implant?" Nina asked, nearly spilling her coffee as she'd been about to pick it up.

"Yeah, some doctors want to try treating people with implanted memories. They think it could help with therapy. Some people have been complaining, saying it's not ethical. Can't say they're wrong." Ben shrugged and sipped his drink.

"I thought they already did that." It was then that Nina recalled reading about it once. She was sure one of her colleagues had written about the topic. "Isn't it really just hypnosis?"

"Not this type. They actually make false memories and stick them into people. Apparently that's supposed to help them sort things out. Honestly, that'd just give me more issues."

"Have they done any human testing?"

"Don't know, didn't really pay much attention to the news when it came up. Probably haven't. I think they were asking the FDA for authorization." Ben looked up from his drink, something in his expression—so relaxed, though tired—shifted in that moment. "But I didn't call you to talk about depressing stuff. No wonder you dumped me," Ben joked, attempting to lighten the mood. Nina couldn't help but smile a bit.

"I thought it was mutual."

"We mutually agreed for you to dump me." Nina found herself laughing for what felt like the first time in a long while. She didn't notice the satisfied smile on Ben's face at the small accomplishment.

"What we both agreed on was that we were both workaholics," she said after a minute, smile still in place. For that moment, all thoughts of Alice and the memories that weren't Nina's own were pushed to the back. It was a moment of normalcy Nina could appreciate.

The moment was shattered by a sharp pain shooting through Nina's head. It was bad enough that it made her wince and lift a hand to her head. Ben's playful demeanor slipped away in an instant, concern overtaking him as he leaned closer to Nina.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

As quickly as it had come, the pain began to ebb away until it was nothing more than a minor annoyance. Nina sat up, her hand returning to the table, next to her coffee.

"It's nothing, I've just been getting headaches. Probably because of the implant," she said, attempting to put Ben at ease. She didn't mention that they had never been so sudden, or so strong.

"Maybe you should get that looked at." Ben frowned, brow furrowing as he studied Nina. "Have you been back for any check-ups?"

"Not lately, but they kept me at the hospital for a while. The doctor mentioned I might have some headaches for some time after the procedure and they're not as frequent lately."

Ben didn't seem to be completely at ease, but he could tell that Nina didn't want to talk about her health issues. She was already much too aware of them as it was. There was a moment of silence, both of them stuck in their own thoughts, before Nina broke it.

"Hey, did you hear about the researcher that was killed recently?" she asked, knowing there was a good chance that Ben would have some useful information.

"And here I thought I was the one with the morbid interests," Ben said. "Is that how you start a casual conversation?"

"Only with you," Nina shot back. Ben actually snorted at that before leaning back with a sigh.

"Yeah, I heard about that. Why?"

"She worked at the research center where I was treated," Nina said, doing her best to sound casual. "From what I hear, she also worked with neuroprosthetics. Might have treated me, for all I know." Ben grimaced, but still answered Nina's question.

"To be honest, I haven't been involved with that case all that much so I don't know much more than what's on the news."

Nina resisted the urge to frown. She'd been hoping Ben would have more knowledge about the case. Still, maybe there was something she could get out of him.

"Fearnley, right? That's the man who did it." Ben nodded. "Did they ever say why he killed her?"

Ben seemed to mull this question over, taking his time as he took a long drink from his coffee. Finally, he looked up at Nina.

"There's no clear motive. Not yet, at least." He paused and looked at Nina suspiciously. "You're not using me to get details for a story again, are you?" Nina would have felt insulted if she hadn't done precisely what Ben accused her of several times before.

"No! I'm not even back at work yet. Thinking of extending my leave if these headaches don't stop by the end of the week." Ben seemed to be convinced. Nina had always lied best when she told half truths. "So the guy just snapped and killed the doctor?"

"I guess. We don't really know, he hasn't said why he did it. Only thing we know is that he was a patient at the place where the victim worked. Maybe something happened at his last checkup." Ben shrugged, and Nina knew she wouldn't get much else out of him.

They finished their drinks and walked out together, standing in the cold and both looking just the slightest bit better than when they'd walked in.

"We should do this more often," Ben said, lips quirking up in a half smile.

"What, talk about depressing shit over barely decent coffee?"

"Yeah, nicer than talking about depressing shit over crappy coffee at work." Nina had to give him that much. "But seriously, if you ever want to talk or if you need anything just call me."

Nina felt a newfound appreciation for her friends when she thought of how open they had all been to helping her through such a difficult time. She just wished the problems she faced were mundane enough that she could rely on them. Instead, she had to hide behind a smile and reassure them that she was fine.

"Thanks," she said, feeling true gratitude. "I'm sure I'll be alright, but I'll call you sometime." Ben seemed to have expected that answer, going by the slightly exasperated look on his face.

"Sure, when you want the inside scoop on your next story." There was no real reproach there, just a show of how well Ben had gotten to know Nina. He was already turning to walk away, lips fixed in a small smile and hands tucked into his coat's pockets.

Nina watched him walk away before turning and heading off back to her apartment. Thoughts of Alice and Fearnley returning to her mind at once with Ben's departure. A headache was starting up already, building up little by little so that Nina had no doubt she'd feel the full force of it by the time she got home.

The short bit of normalcy Nina had achieved seemed already like a distant memory.

- - - - - - - - -

Hey everyone! Here's another chapter that I hope you'll all like. I know updates are coming out fast for now, but they'll be slowing down starting next month (so next week, haha). Anyway, thank you all for reading and please vote/comment if you can!

Have a great week everyone and good luck to those of you who entered the Wattys! 





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