In her dreams, she floated on and on. Those visual images which slipped into her mind were vivid and realistic- there was blood, images of her family and friends and of herself. She couldn’t fully grasp the situation. The last thing she remembered was of Edward’s face and nothing else. She tried moving her hands but apparently, something was preventing her from doing so. The sense of numbness was a little discomforting.

“Alison? Alison?” the angel called out.

“I’m here.” She wanted to croak out but she couldn’t speak for some reason.

“Can you hear me?” the angel asked.

“Yes, I can.” She tried saying it but no words came from her mouth.

“Alison, open your eyes if you can,” the angel urged.

Yes, I should. Alison thought. But she didn’t want to return back to the reality and face all the load of problems overburdening her. She just wanted to sleep and forget everything. Yet, she couldn’t resist but respond slightly as someone’s hand touched her. She recognized the firm grasp as that belonging to Edward and with the unexpected resurgence of love for him bursting out from within her, she unwillingly opened her eyes.

The first thing Alison registered was the sheer clarity of the lamps and the white, blank ceiling. She could smell the revolting scent of medicine and sickness.

“Where am I?” she asked throatily. Her throat felt so parched and dry. It almost hurt to be talking.

“In the hospital.” A figure sitting next to her answered. She turned her head awkwardly and saw Edward, the love of her life, gazing at her all concernedly.

“Edward?” she hesitated. “What am I doing here?” The only thing she recalled was that she had attended Jessica’s party. Something must have happened then…..

“You fainted,” he admitted. Alison tried sitting up and she felt woozy. Suddenly, a strong pair of hands steadied her.

“Careful, love,” Edward said as he pressed a button and the bed automatically adjusted the height. Alison leant back against the bed frame and smiled gratefully at her boyfriend.

“What time is it?”

“3am in the morning.”

“Why aren’t you in bed now?” Alison asked faintly as her eyes struggled to concentrate their focus on him.

“I couldn’t sleep. I was too worried,” Edward admitted somewhat grudgingly. After a long tense pause, he added, “Your parents were in the waiting room. However, they’ve gone home already. They insisted on not disturbing you.”

What? Instantly, she bolted straight right up and was in alert mode. Flummoxed, her expression changed into something resembling dissatisfaction and unhappiness. “Oh no, what did they say?” she moaned. She feared that her militant father would go on a rampage and blame her for being so irresponsible and careless and her mother would end up lecturing her on how unladylike it was to faint in public although she couldn’t possible help it.

“Don’t worry. I handled them pretty well,” Edward replied smoothly.

“You?” Alison couldn’t help but sound skeptical. The thought of Edward, a mere 19-year-old boy although he was in truth a basketball prodigy too, facing her self-obsessed parents was a little hard to imagine.

“Oh no!” she exclaimed as a sudden errant thought dawned on her. “Do they know about us?” She gestured weakly at Edward and herself.

Edward couldn’t hide a little grin. “Yep, the cat’s out of the bag now,” he said happily.

“Why’re you so pleased about it?” Alison snapped. This really complicated things.

“Don’t you understand?” Edward rolled his eyes mockingly. “I can finally introduce myself to them as your official boyfriend. You don’t know the pressure I face. There’s a lot of competition between the boys for you.”

“Oh really?” Alison couldn’t entirely mask her skepticism again. As far as she could tell, guys weren’t lining up droves waiting to date her. Was Edward just joking as usual?

“Sure,” Edward replied seriously and hesitated. “You might also want to know that….Alex is also waiting to talk to you too.” Alex? Alex? Alison questioned herself. With a pang, all her memories came flooding back to her.- the betrayal of Carrie and Alex and the shock of knowing that they did it. 

“I don’t want to see him,” Alison said obstinately.

Edward eyed her speculatively before murmuring, “I heard about what happened. As his brother, I think you should also give him a chance to explain. And your sister too.”

“Why’re you speaking up for him?” Alison demanded. She was counting on Edward to be on her side just this once. Yet, he was behaving as if he was Alex’s good big brother.

Edward paused. “I empathize him. I know how it feels like to be misunderstood by someone…” he trailed off.

“What?” Alison asked politely as Edward snapped out of his reverie. “I’m just saying what Alex did was probably unintentional even though it might not be a pardonable act,” he explained fluidly.

“How is my parents taking to this? Do they know…know about…Carrie and Alex?” Alison asked uncertainly. She hated the thought of Carrie in trouble although they weren’t not on the best of terms right now. She wondered if her father was going to purchase a gun to shoot Carrie the moment he realized she had unprotected sex with their neighbors’ son. This wasn’t something terribly clever but then again… this was her father, after all. Expect the unexpected, that was a phrase that could describe him. Her mother on the other hand was less predictable. Alison couldn’t definitely gauge her reaction but she was certain that her mother, being so consumed in the traditional ways, wouldn’t condone her sister’s actions and would do something equally drastic.

“No, they don’t,” Edward answered immediately. “I must say, Miss Hampton covered up convincingly for your sister.” He pronounced the name disagreeably as if it was a rotting stale fish.

“I still can’t believe my own sister had sex,” she spat out angrily. If only she wasn’t confined to the hospital bed, she would have gotten up and expressed her anger physically.

“Me too,” Edward echoed amusingly. “I still can’t believe my brother had sex. And as so it happens, it’s such a coincidence that he lost his virtue to your sister.”

“Yea, sure.” Alison frowned. “If this had happened in Japan, tongues would be wagging about our family. Is anyone actually going to treat this scandal as a gossip?” She wasn’t sure how the typical Americans would react but for the first time, she felt relieved being in a more liberal society which was more accepting to such acts. She shuddered when she thought how her Japanese friends would have viewed her if they had heard of her sister doing such an atrocious thing…

“Please, Alison, we don’t live in the Stone age.” Edward laughed in his usual, deep, throaty voice that always made her body tingle. “Such things happen every time. They’ll probably forget about in in a day to come.”

“Wait.” Alison frowned. She suddenly thought of something. To her, it was a sensitive topic  and if she was in her mother’s shoes, she would probably have died from embarrassment then blurt out the question to a boy but since she was in a “modern” period, she might as well just risk being a laughing stock and ask.

She looked at him in the eye and asked with a straight face, “Edward…erm… is your virtue still intact?”

There was a beat of silence. Edward’s grin widened considerably and he threw back his head in laughter. Alison stared at him. How could he be laughing? This was a serious matter, well, to her at least. Or…maybe he was so amused because he had done it before…

“Edward, you didn’t do it with Amber right?” Alison asked. She wasn’t sure what she would do but to know that this beauty whom she had never known before had once taken away something from Edward that she would never ever possess herself was enough to make her entire being hysterical.

“Does it actually matter?”

“Yes, it does!” Alison cried out as the monitor started beeping furiously as her heartbeat went faster and faster. Her blood pressure was also increasing rapidly too.

“Alison!” Edward stared at the screen, looking horrified. “Do I need to call the doctor?” He started heading towards the door.

“If you do, I’ll never talk to you again,” Alison threatened as she tried to plug the drip out from her arm. Edward rushed to her side and pinned her down.

“Can you stop acting in such a childish manner?” The humor was gone from his face.

“Give me a definite answer.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Did you or did you not lose your virtue to Amber?” Alison demanded persistently.

“So what if I did?” Edward challenged.

“Is that a confirmation?”

“Why are you so fucking obsessed with it? Who cares who you did it with?” He rolled his eyes.

“I care.” Alison clutched her chest, breathing hard. “It saddens me if I realize my boyfriend had given his most precious thing to another girl.”

“Please, Alison, you’re in fucking America, right now,” Edward growled. “This is not Japan and we’re not as conservative as your darling Japanese friends.”

“Does that mean all Americans have to have sex before they’re an adult then?” Alison retorted as the tears clouded her vision. Why was Edward so insensitive? Hadn’t he realized that to many people, one’s virtue is the most important thing? How can he so callously and carelessly throw it away to some random girl? If this was just some liberal American thing, she would just hurl herself at him.

Edward looked furious. “Alison, can we drop this topic please?” he insisted.

“Give me an answer. Just one word.” Alison wasn’t going to back down. Maybe it was a female thing but suddenly, his answer seemed to matter a lot to her. Or maybe it was because of the fact that he looked so shifty and reluctant as if he was trying to avoid replying to her question.

A knock on the door startled both of them. Edward’s face grew stiff as a nurse entered the room.

“More pain medication, darling?” an elderly nurse asked.

“Yes, I think she needs some.” Edward shot her a look which Alison responded with a glare.

The nurse proceeded to the IV drip and started fiddling with it by inserting some sort of drug solution. Alison watched this procedure silently but her mind was whirling with thoughts. How had a conversation about Carrie and Alex changed into something concerning Edward?

“You’re done for now,” the nurse said kindly before slipping out of the room.

“Now, will you give me your answer?” Alison asked the moment the nurse was out of hearing and sight.

Edward gazed at Alison, looking as if he was about to give up and comply. Throwing up his hands in surrender, he said in a strained voice, “Fine, since you’re so insistent, I did it before with Amber. Does that make you happy?”

“Was she the only.... one?” Alison gaped at him.

“Er…no, I think I did it with another girl when I was seventeen before,” Edward conceded. “But I don’t remember what her name was.”

“You had sex with a girl whom you don’t know?” Alison implored.

“Hmm, yes.” He sounded unsure.

Alison leant back against the bed frame in shock. No way, Edward had sex with someone else before and it wasn’t with only one person. For all she knew, he was probably this sex-crazed boy who had never told her before about his promiscuous sex life. This just wasn’t acceptable. Call her old-fashioned or traditional but back in Japan, the unwritten rule was that if someone had engaged in a pre-marital sex before, he or she would have ruined the honor and reputation of his family and causing them to suffer condemn and ridicule. This might sound a little extreme but in a society whereby the elevation of a family’s position was dependent on honor, the Japanese can’t help but be less accepting of certain things.

“Alison? Are you okay? ” Edward looked distracted. Well, Alison couldn’t blame him. After all, he had just blurted out his sex life to his girlfriend. How embarrassing can it possibly become?

“Why didn’t you tell me all this?” Alison had to resist whining.

“I didn’t think it would matter.”

“Why…why did you choose to...lose your virtue to Amber?” Alison stammered.

“I…” Edward was unconfident for once. He paused as he evaluated on the best way to proceed. “Certain things just occurred. It was complicated and I couldn’t control it.”

His words touched a familiar note in Alison’s memory. Were these “certain things” what Alex had implied about Edward keeping secrets from her?

“Edward, what exactly happened between Amber and you?” she asked cautiously.

“Why are you asking all these?” he questioned.

“Honestly, Edward, do you think I’m a fool?” Alison glared at him. “Do you think I wouldn’t realize that Amber’s brief absence from high school in her senior year had something to do with you?”

“How did you find out?” Edward looked appalled and nervous at the same time.

“If you have the guts to do something, you shouldn’t be afraid of others gossiping about it. Tell me,” Alison spat aggressively. “- what happened four years ago?”

“ENOUGH!” Edward shouted and got up, knocking down the chair in a hurry. He shot her a vicious look and frowned. “I’ll talk to you when you’re finally clear-headed.”

“No, Ed-” Alison cried out as he darted out of the room. Edward’s strange behavior didn’t give her the answers she had expected and she only felt more confused than ever. Yet, their conversation reaffirmed that whatever Angela had told her was accurate and it told her subconscious instinct that something was very wrong indeed about him.

***