Holden

I'm pulling into Maya's apartment building parking lot on Tuesday evening when I'm hit with an overwhelming sense of calm. My day was pretty normal - Mom came over in the morning for her usual check in and plant watering, and then I was able to get working on my very last exhibit piece. I didn't even know that I needed that calm feeling, but it sure seems like I do.

  I've emailed photos of a few of them to the gallery owners and they love them, so I'm keeping the rest as a surprise. My final piece is a self portrait - it's not really a painting of me, though. It's how I feel right in this moment. It's how I want the world to see me. It's everything and more.

  Now, tonight, is the start of something special with me and Maya. Sure, we've already started our new relationship but this will be our real first date. She doesn't want to rush, and I'll try my best, for her.

  I'm here, I text her then drop my phone into my lap.

  It buzzes almost right away. Be right down.

  She's wearing a white sun dress that has flowers all over, and brown boots. Her hair is tied back near her neck, and she's not even looking at me as she crosses the parking lot to my truck, but I can feel her.

  "Hi, beautiful," I say as she slides in beside me.

  She blushes and I love how she looks when she's embarrassed. She obviously dressed up for me, and, god, do I love that. I wore black jeans and a tight shirt with buttons at the neck. I trimmed my beard and put gel in my hair. I want to impress her, too.

  "Hey," she says easily, then leans in and kisses my cheek. "How was your day?"

  My smile comes without even trying. "Good. I started on my last piece for the exhibit."

  "Oh, that's amazing." She beams, and I just want to kiss her.

  "Yeah. What about you?"

  She rolls her eyes right away. "Well, Nella and I took Willow to pick out a gift for the baby, from her. But it was nap time and Willow was a disaster. I think she's realizing she won't be the only child soon, too."

  "Ohh yes. Man, I remember that feeling. I was four when Landon was born. I was happy to have a brother but man, sharing my mom's attention was hard," I tell her.

  She nods. "She's only two. She'll be three in August. But yeah, it's going to be an adjustment. The baby is due in three weeks."

  I cross the parking lot and pull out back onto the road, then start driving towards town.

  "June, man. A baby, a wedding and my exhibit," I say, glancing at Maya.

  "Yeah. Crazy," she agrees, then reaches over and slips her hand into mine. It's the best feeling ever, but I try to stay calm.

  "So, I was thinking... we can go to whatever movie you want to see and we can just pig out on theatre food, for dinner?" I tell her, hoping she'll be on board with my plan.

  A big smile spreads across her face. "That sounds awesome."

  She picks a rom-com and nachos and popcorn. I pick a soft pretzel and a Coke and she says we can share the popcorn because it's a huge bag. The movie theatre is pretty much empty, since it's a Tuesday evening, so we go up to the middle of the back row and get comfortable.

  "We've been here before," she tells me, before the previews start. "Like, in these seats."

  It hits me that she's right. We didn't go to movies very often together but one time we did, when things were good, and we sat in the same spot.

  "Oh my god. We saw that Nicholas Sparks movie," I say, as it's all coming back to me.

  "Yep. And you got all hot and bothered and we made out in your mom's car in the parking lot after," she says and giggles.

  My face feels warm, thinking about that. I remember not wanting to bring her home. We were kids in love and I always wanted to be with her then, too. Now, I have her again. I have another chance.

  The movie begins and I rest my hand onto her leg as she eats her snacks. She lets me keep it there. We laugh and groan, but it's not a bad movie overall. I can tell Maya likes it and I love hearing her laugh.  It's right up there as my favourite sound.

  The credits have just started rolling and the five other people in the theatre are clearing out, as Mayas phone buzzes.

  I watch as she pulls it out of her purse and answers it, looking confused.

  "Hey, George." She freezes and looks shocked, then concerned. "Okay, we will be right there. Yeah we are in town, so maybe fifteen minutes. Okay, bye."

  I'm staring at her, waiting. Her eyes are wide.

  "Nella's water broke. They just got to the hospital," she tells me, and she's pale as a ghost now.

  "Oh. Oh wow. Okay, let's go."

  It feels eerily like the last time we left somewhere in a hurry to get to Nella, but I know this is different. It's just a coincidence that we are together again now. That coffee date feels like forever ago.

  I drive fast without being reckless, and we pull into the hospital lot twenty minutes later. I watch as Maya takes a few deep breaths. She seems worried.

  "She's okay. The baby's coming," I tell her, hoping to calm her.

  She forces a smile at me and squeezes her hands together.  "I've just never... this is new to me."

  "Me too," I say, then laugh. 

  We finally get inside and up to the labor and delivery floor. Maya asks at the desk where Nella is and the nurse says she'll check and come back and let us know. She texts George, too, but she's still not able to relax.

  I slip my hand into hers and it's sweating. "Hey, Maya, I'm here."

  "Yeah," she says quickly, squeezing my hand. "I know."

  It takes a few more minutes before the nurse comes back over to where we are waiting. She's tall and thin and wearing glasses and a mask.

  "Your sister is in active labour. Her husband in with her. You guys can wait here and I'll come back with updates."

  "Is she okay?" Maya spits out.

  The nurse smiles warmly. "Well, she's having a baby."

  We sit back down and wait. The minutes pass slowly. I hate how agitated Maya is and I can't seem to soothe her.

  "You could go, if you want. Who knows how long this might take," she tells me, after we've been sitting there for about twenty minutes.

  I take in a deep breath and turn towards her. "I'm not going anywhere, Maya. I'm here for you, always. I can tell you're nervous and I would never just leave you here."

  Her eyes meet mine and she looks far too serious for a few moments. "I love you."

  Wait, what?  She's never said it to me, I mean, not since we were teenagers. I told her that I still love her and I always have, but this is new. This is different. It's More.

  "Maya, shit, I love you," I say quickly.

  She laughs and then leans in and puts her head on my shoulder. "Thank you."

  An hour passes before the nurse approaches us again. She looks happy. "Nella is pushing. It won't be long now."

  Maya stiffens a bit beside me. I don't know why all of this makes her so tense but I just squeeze her hand and do whatever I can to keep her calm.

  Ten minutes later, we see George pushing open the swinging doors and coming towards us. He has this massive smile that reaches his eyes and he's also crying. We stand up, the anticipation higher than ever.

  "Baby boy is here," George says excitedly. "No name yet-"

  "Is Nella okay?" Maya interrupts him.

  George looks confused for a second. "Yeah, she's good. She was a queen in there, no pain meds. I mean, that was a fast labor."

  And then Maya is crying. Like full out sobbing, tears pouring down her face. I wrap my arms around her and she sighs heavily, and then pulls away and hugs George.

  "Congrats, Dad. You have a son," she says, and finally I can tell she's relaxed once again.

  She just needed to know her sister was okay.

  George looks like the happiest man in the world. And that's the first time ever that I realize I envy him. I want what he has. A wife and two kids. A family to spend every day with. And I hope to god I'll get that chance again, with Maya.