The Past is in the Past.

In the past, that's where it all began. In the past is where my life changed. In the past, I swore myself to vengeance. This is a story about how my life changed, and how I changed with it. My name is Flame Hearth, and this is my revenge story.

Chapter 1.

Don't let looks deceive you. Aside from the crimson red hair and matching eyes, I have many years of fury built up inside of me. The years of torture I endured have not stopped. The people who have caused it, have not stopped. Nothing has stopped, only my mind. I have stopped feeling emotions, I only understand them, feeling them and understanding them are two different things. I have discarded them all, except for the ones that matter the most...rage and anger. Those two have the most space in my half mended heart. I did have feelings once that was when I cared. When I actually cared, I was weaker, softer and in general you could walk right over me. But not anymore, because I have a plan. And this is phase one.

I was scrambling around my house, looking for something that would help my plan. My money, I had lost my grandparents in a car crash. In the will, I was the only one mentioned. My parents are rich enough, they said that the money was mine to do with as I please. Hundreds upon thousands upon millions of dollars. I was shocked to first receive such a large quantity of money, I had no idea with what to do with it. I thought it was a joke at first, it was really a shock to me, and I was very young when I first received it. In my commotion I had woken up my parents. They work from home, so their work office is the living room, which sucks for me. I watch T.V. in there. Throwing my clothes in every possible direction, I finally found it. A black box, with a gold lock, fiddling around in my drawers. I found the matching gold key. Putting in the key, I turn it and hear a click. Lifting the lid, I take about four thousand from the box. Feeling my stomach rumbling, I walk to the kitchen. I think I'll make something small. I scrambled a few eggs with a couple of pieces of bacon on the griddle. My parents walk down the spiral steps and see me in the kitchen.

"Good morning sweetheart! Did you sleep well?"

My father's deep voice, dances in my ear and mixes with the sound of frying bacon. My mother rubs her eyes and somewhat smiles at me. She's tired from work, she stayed up until 2:00 in the morning last night. It must be hard.

"Morning guys! How are you feeling?"

"Good, thanks for asking. Leaving early again today?"

I usually leave for school early, so I listen to music around the campus and hang around in my safe hole. I made a spot for myself in the school campus, of course the teachers know about it. So that they know where I am, if they don't see me around in the gym or on the field, they know where I am. Not a single student knows, and I'd like to keep it that way.

"Yeah, so I'll finish up here and be on my way."

"Okay Flame, love you."

My mother speaks,
at me with tired and worn out eyes.

"And Mom, sleep a bit longer today. Love you guys."

I finish my food and walk up the stairs. At my school, we are free to wear whatever we please. They said it helps us to express ourselves. As long as it stay within the regulations. Although, there a few of kids that break those rules. No short skirts, no tube tops and no halter tops. Those are for girls and I follow them, I have reason to break them. I'm not trying to impress any boys, I don't have an interest in boys at this time in my life. Other girls in my school do, all they think is boys. I like this boy and this boy likes me, but I don't like him. That's all they talk about. I slip on a purple shirt, knee long short jeans, and my high tops. I prefer them over slippers or sandals, more so high heels. I absolutely hate them. I like to wear plain clothes, nothing that draws too much attention to myself.

"I'm leaving."

I shut the door and start my walk to school. Walking to school takes about fifteen minutes. It's around December, so it's getting really cold, the good thing is I remembered to grab my sweater before I stepped out of the house. Wrapping the fuzzy fabric around my arms and back fills me with warmth. The crunching of the leaves fills my ears and takes me to my mindscape, bringing with it memoires, some of them I cherish some of them I don't. The day with regret, that's what I call it. The day when many things changed me. It was a year ago, and I was a lot more of a dork back then, I studied a lot. I never did anything bad, I never talked. I only had me and my music. That was good enough for me. So one day I decided that I wanted someone to talk to. I walked up to some girls and said hi. They just laughed in my face, I was a little hurt, but I shrugged it off and moved on to the next group. I will admit there was a boy I liked back then, his name was Devan Winters. He was a popular boy, I knew he would never like me, but I admired him from the shadows. In the two worlds we lived in that were completely different, I always had a ray of hope for him. He was having trouble in his biology classes so I said I could tutor him. He agreed, and we started that same day, I was extremely nervous. But we got along for the first few days. I thought that I could take things a step further. He didn't reject me at first, then as I advanced he started to get colder with me. He would answer with a solid yes or no, and he would give a death glare. I went down with my advances and things were okay for a while. Until I made a mistake, I asked him if he wanted me to tutor him that same afternoon. I guess he was in a bad mood, because he snapped at me. He called me a couple of horrible names, and it broke my heart. I felt like I was to blame. After that it got even worse, he began to bully me. He would purposely trip or push me, graffiti on my locker, and finally cyberbully me. I heard my laptop beeping in the night and only found horrible messages emailed to me. In short, he tortured me. But enough of him. Then, I saw a group of boys. They looked nice enough and simple to me, so I tried my luck. To surprise me, they readily accepted me. I ate with them, and they became my friends. They were faithful, loyal, and never betrayed me. We would talk about simple things, we shared secrets even. They would tell me about the girls they liked and who liked them. I told them about the crush I had on Devan, it was the first time I told anyone about my crush on him. They said they would never tell anyone. I made a mistake when I said I trust them. They stabbed me in the back and told him everything. I was heartbroken, he said, "I hate you and never want to see you again. I'll get another tutor." I was broken inside. He said it in front of the whole school. All the teachers and students laughed at me. It was the moment when I swore myself to vengeance, I thought that the world was a place of hurt and pain. I thought I never wanted to be part of that world, but I came to terms with myself and made a plan. And we're getting to the good part of it.

Chapter 2.

As I arrived at school, all eyes, and I mean every set of eyes, turned to me. The boys especially, they turned the faces away when I smiled at them. All the girls whispered. I know, I know. If you remember I was embarrassed and people should be laughing at me, but this is my plan. To be someone else, I told my principal that I would be leaving the school and transferring. And a new student would take my place. Flame Hearth, the new me. The one that's going to get revenge on the one that hurt me.

Stepping into the Principal's office, I see him by his desk. Standing, drinking coffee. He sees me and puts down his cup.

"Ah...Flame was it? Flame Hearth. Are you here to get your schedule?"

He has the features of an older man, white hair and tired, weary eyes. His smile brings laugh lines with it, and crow's feet at the corner of his eyes. Bushy eyes brows that remind me of a fuzzy caterpillar, furrow together and lift up.

"Yes Sir, I would like to go to class early."

I was a dork, but I still had a personality. If I stick to my old ways, people will find the truth in seconds. I have be different. I slouch my back and lift my head high, I bought a completely new wardrobe. So now my closet is full of expensive clothes, most of them are shoes. I bought boots and high tops, so I can I look different. I switch my voice to a deeper one, my usual one is a bit squeakier and pitchy. But I need to change. I left my new hair to blow in the wind, and my red eyes to flash. The old version of me looked completely different than this. I had black short, with brown eyes. I stood up straight, but kept my head down. I had a colorful bag, decorated with flowers of some sort. But now, I switched it for a plain black and red one, that way it would match my hair. Contact lenses, hair extensions and dye. That's why I look this way. So that I won't be recognized.

"Okay here it is. Now go on, I have things to do."

He hands me a small slip of crumpled paper and does a shooing motion. Taking the hint, I step out of his office.

As I got outside I was attacked with questions. About ten boys surrounded me and bombarded me with their stupid questions. The most common one was, what was your name? I pretended to blush and shyly hid me face. My response was to see them blushing apple red. I pushed my way through and stood before them.

"My name? Oh... my name is Flame, Flame Hearth. Nice to meet you."

A boy I recognize stands in front of me, it's one of my past friends, Marcus Smith. He was the one that told Devan everything, I guess I have to be nice to him, at least for now.

"Um, Flame? Can we hang out sometime? I mean, if you want. We can be friends."

His face is really red, he looks so uneasy. All the boys are looking at me, waiting for an answer. Most of them walking away, hearing someone call them. He eyes look at me with doubt and I smile at him.

"I'd love to, I just came here, so I have no friends."

I lean in close so that I'm whispering into his ear. His whole face is red now, he gulps nervously and bites his bottom lip. His usually brown ears turn bright red.

"You don't have to be so embarrassed. I don't bite."

I giggle and he shyly grins back, opening his once closed lips, he speaks a few words.

"I'm Marcus, Marcus Smith. Nice to meet you Flame. I like your hair. It's so red."

"A few complements can get you very far Marcus."

I run my fingers through his messy brown hair, fixing it in place. He looks better with his hair neatly combed. Pushing a wisp of hair behind his ear, he pulls my hand and leads me to class.

I know this room, this is the room I hate the most. I met Devan in this room, the biology room. The flashbacks rush into my head, making me feel dizzy. I nearly stumble to the floor. A strong pull brings me out of my daze.

"Hey, Flame, are you okay? You almost fell."

Marcus had pulled my arm, keeping me from falling. He did save me, although he hurt me...he still... no, he has to pay for what he did to me, this is his retribution. Giving him a small smile, he walks me to a chair before plopping himself into the one next to it. I sit slouched over, pretending not to pay attention. After all, I know all of this already.

The class goes by quickly, I mostly daydreamed throughout the entire period. But it was the flashbacks that haunted me throughout the class. I saw myself with Devan, him yelling at me, and me on the floor, crying in a balled position. I tried to shake away the feeling of wrong-doing that came from me wanting to take revenge. Is this...the right thing to do? I asked myself this countless times, I thought that if I pushed the thoughts into the deepest and darkest parts of my mind then...

"Why am I so bent on this?"

I asked myself, mumbling. My body moves on its own and begins to take me to my safe hole. I look at the students passing and stop dead in my tracks. Devan, the one that made me this way... changing direction and ignoring my body's impulse to run I turn towards him. I pretend to look lost and bump into him.

"Hey! Wat-"

I act innocent and blush. He sees me and stares, his eyes vacant. Did he recognize me? It would all be lost if he did.

"I'm so sorry! I'm new here and I need some help getting to the café. Sorry to be a bother."

He says nothing, mouth open and eyes blank. A vacant expression fills them, and tears fill his eyes.

"Flame, is your name Flame Hearth? Please tell me it is!"

He knows! I stagger and nearly fall to the ground.

"I have to go!"

Running, I could have walked, but the fear suddenly grabbed me and impulse took over. My legs taken over by fright, I reached my safe hole in at least one minute or less. Panting wildly, I finally reach. My safe hole isn't gloomy at all. It's actually very pretty. On the outside it looks like a normal deserted classroom, but on the inside it's complete different. Light blue wallpaper, bean bag chairs, and even a few table with my stuff. I like to make remixes of songs, so this is a perfect place to do it. A nice and quiet little spot, just for me. No students ever come in here, it's locked, and only I have the key. I pushed the door and turned the lock. My thoughts racing through my head, I slump into one of the bean bag chairs, how? That's the only question that reaches my mind, I changed everything about myself, so how did he recognize me?! And he even knew my name! This has to be a mistake, there is no possible way he knows about me...well, the new me. I need to calm down, it's a mistake. I should listen to my music. I slip my headphones over my head, plugging in the cord, my dubstep music blasts in my ears. The noise level doesn't bother me, I've set the music a lot louder than this. The tension in my muscles, the quickness of my breath, my raging heartbeat, all things finally calm at the sound of the bass thumping. I try to clear my head of my minor setback. That's right, this is but a setback. Nothing more nothing less. I can easily fix this, I just-

"I wonder where she went. Flame, it can't be right?"

My thoughts cut off entirely, the sound of Devan's voice stopped me from breathing even. I ducked my head and cowered behind the bean bag chair. The footsteps fade away, leaving me on the floor.

"That was close. I hoped he wouldn't look through the window, or peak through the blinds."

Breathing in relief, I stand, my crouched legs feeling relieved from the stress of the weight. Dusting off my clothes, I fiddle though my pocket. I have Math next...what a pain.

Chapter 3

Trudging through the halls, I'm stopped in my tracks by a strong pull, Marcus. What does he want with me? His eyes glint with mischief, I know that look, and I don't like it. His grip tightens on my forearm, turning the area slightly red. I would wince in pain, but this doesn't hurt. I feel nothing anymore. The only things I know are rage and anger. Those that matter. He twists, smiling at me, my face a blank expression. When he finally lets go, my entire forearm is red. Almost like the color of my hair. His brown eyes look shocked for a moment, regaining the light to them, he frowns.

"So did that hurt? By now most girls would be screaming and crying."

"I'm not like most girls, if you haven't noticed, the red hair and eyes. High tops, and non-pitchy voice."

I gesture to my figure, his gaze travels with my hands. I cup his face in my hands and lean in close to his face. Staring at his face in close proximity, he matches my gaze, neither of us breaking away. Like a child having a staring contest with a fish, only to learn that fish don't blink. How long we stayed like that... I haven't the foggiest idea. His eyes water, and he blinks. I pull away and somewhat smile.

"Yeah, I noticed. It's the main reason most of the boys were staring at you."

Showing him a small smile, he grabs my hands in his. Staring even closer than before...a little too close for my comfort.

"Well, let's go get lunch. I'm starving."

The walk to the lunch room was filled with conversation, I said mostly lies. So that he wouldn't recognize, I felt so dirty. Telling lies, felt so...wrong. Like I was, killing myself slowly...it was a horrible feeling. All the things I used to like, replaced by fakes. Reading, swimming, and cooking. All taken and switched into playing video games, basketball, and fighting. All things I've never done, all things I made up. Again, the feeling of guilt came to me, nearly making me cry. I felt so dirty, I was literally lying to myself, telling myself that I was a different person. Lying to myself is just plain wrong. I kept asking myself, should I go through with this? But when I was at the hair salon, and the hairdresser put the dye on my head I knew it, right then and there. There was no going back, I can't change it now. It was already done. So that day, while they painted my head with the red dye, I struggled to hold back my tears. So when I saw myself in the mirror...on the outside I said, thanks I really like it. On the inside I was screaming, crying and curling into a ball. I hated myself ever since, when I got home that day, I just told my parents I wanted a new look. My father simply said, "I like it, you look beautiful." My mother, she said more or less the same thing, but I could tell, maybe it was motherly instinct or intuition. But she knew there was something else, she could see through my colors, and make me transparent. I hated when she did it, she never came to me and said "What's really going on?" I guess she just turned a blind eye to it. I had pushed the thought aside, but now...it's coming back to haunt me. I need to switch the topic.

"So Marcus, what's this school like? I'm curious."

"The school? Hmmm, it's pretty boring and quiet. Well, it was boring and quiet. After, Kelly Scott moved."

I froze in my spot, my feet losing strength. Marcus' eyes glare at me, questioning, yet filled with innocence. I let go of his hand, letting mine dangle at my side. Hearing my old name...it really shook me up. If I stay so upset, then people are bound to start imaging things.

"Who's Kelly Scott?"

"Oh, she used to go to this school, but then something happened. So she moved. Here's the story. If I remember, she liked that guy over there. Devan winters, he was a really popular guy, had so many girls falling for him. Sadly, she happened to fall in that category, he embarrassed her in front of every single kid in school, teachers and even the principal were laughing. It was pretty harsh, I had something to do in it myself. I told Devan that she liked him, he was pissed for at least, two seconds, he looked kind of happy after. It looked he kind of liked her."

"What was she like?"

"Well I knew her pretty well, shy, quiet but really kind. Her hair was short and inky black, with brown eyes to top it off. I liked her, as a friend though. She was really nice, that's why it hurts me so much to know that I hurt her the way I did."

He actually thought about me? Despite what has happened, he was hurt while I was...thinking of hurting him. How is this possible? He's not the monster I told myself he is, he changed, does this mean... I think I should let this go. I'm not sure...I'll just be nice to these people, and avoid Devan on a whole, and I guess...make some friends.

"So, you're sorry you hurt her? She was your friend, and I guess you told each other secrets?"

"Yeah, I told her about this girl, I liked and in turn, she told me about her crush on Devan. The only reason I told him is because...he liked her. He told me in secret though, he wanted to know if she felt the same way. I don't understand him, it's like, he makes up his mind then he changes it. And it depends whose around him. If I remember, she asked him about tutoring. He was struggling in Biology, that's what Kelly told me. He was with another girl that liked him, she wasn't as nerdy as Kelly was. She was one of the popular kids, so naturally, he said yes to her faster, although...he wasn't happy. They posted up pictures everywhere, but he was never smiling in a single one. I always saw this in particular but, when he was being tutored by Kelly, he never stopped smiling. But with the other girl...it was all frowns all day. I think...if Kelly never left, he would be smiling more."

"Oh...but wouldn't she be upset with him? I mean...he did embarrass her in front of the entire school."

"Yeah, I would be pretty ticked off too. Well...ticked off isn't the right word. But I'm in school, so no bad language."

These people...have changed. They actually feel pity for me now, well seeing as though they don't even know my real name. And that girl, I remember her now, her name was...Rita Flowers. She was a popular girl, her parents had money so she did as well. I remember her being really snobby, stuck up and rude. She violated the dress code rules, and acted like she owned the school...as well as the people in it. In my own world that I alone lived in, I never once envied her. In the world of aloneness, and fear, she struck me as a demon. All the other girls admired her, saying she was a goddess. But I never thought that way, I told myself this. If I became her, then my life would be horrible. To go to bed and wake up every morning, to know that I torture people, just so that they think I'm wonderful, plain sickening. In my own little world, she became someone to be feared. In this school, they have a system, popular and nobody important. I was at the bottom, even with my very few friends. Devan and Rita, shone at the top like stars.

"Oh...I get it. Don't worry, I don't tell for infantile things. To me it's stupid, just something that's not necessary."

"Good, I don't like people that tattle. They love getting me in trouble, and trouble just seems to follow me around. But enough about that topic, let's eat some lunch."

Chapter 4

I felt sick, it was a feeling I was getting used to, one that came to me often. Ever since I started this plan. I don't think I can go through with this anymore. I feel, like I'm acting...just like Rita. Right now, I'm just using Marcus to get revenge, I'm a horrible person. Should I tell him the truth, or will he rat me out again? Is it okay to put faith in a person, even after they already broke the fragile link of trust you have formed? Is it too late for me to try again? Or is it okay, to hope that hope isn't for suckers? I'll put a little faith in him, if he rats me out again...I'll have to end things.

"Hey Marcus, I have to tell you something. But it's a secret, to show good friendship. If you tell anyone...let's just say you won't see tomorrow."

"S-sure! I kind of like living."

Trying to relax, my shaky breaths reach his ears. He takes my hand and leads me back to the lunch table we just left. My wobbly legs finally give in, making me collapse into the chair again. If this is a mistake give me some kind of sign. I look around, nothing new happens, people getting up, people sitting down. And finally people just talking and eating lunch, generally having a good time. I guess that means, it's a good idea.

"Okay, don't think of me differently, I want you to still see me in the same way you do now."

"What are you getting at? I'm getting scared now."

"I'm Kelly Scott, the same girl that you all bullied out of school. I just changed my look."

He looks dumbfounded. Mouth open, eyes wide, and hands shaking. He takes my hand, an act he did when he was trying to find out something from me. In return I would always shake his hand away pinch his cheeks. If I do it now, then he's going to know it's me. Without hesitation, I do just that. He lifts me up from the bench seat and pulls me into a strong hug. Accepting his advance I pinch his cheeks once more.

"Kelly...I missed you. What happened? Why did you do this to yourself?"

"Why? It's simple really."

Letting my voice go back to normal, I hold his hands, gripping them tightly.

"I did it because I didn't want to be laughed anymore, I was tired of it. I'll explain but it's going to take a while. How about later? Come over to my house."

"Kelly...I'm so sorry, please forgive me."

"I already did, you told me you how sorry you are. So no hard feelings, I always missed my best friend."

I held his hand as he wiped away the tears threatening to fall from his eyes. I feel so bad for thinking about hurting him, I guess my revenge plan will be put on hold. Unless someone does something, then I might change my mind.

I fell asleep in class, I was tired of feeling bad for hurting people that I fell asleep with my hands covering my head. But I wasn't at peace in my dreams, I had nightmares. I dreamt of Devan laughing at me, (nothing new there) and I dreamt of Marcus. Only this time he kept saying "I'm so sorry" and all the while I heard ear rupturing screams. And to top it off, Rita, staring with the usual smirk on her face. I don't know why she was in my dreams, out of all the horrible nightmares I've had, she hasn't been in a single one. I was so shocked I immediately sat upright in my chair, my eyes wide with fear, and my hands trembling terribly. I should go to the bathroom. Without a care in the world, I stood up and began to make my way to the bathroom. But, of course, nothing ever goes my way. And the teacher just had to get into my way.

"Ms. Hearth, where do you think you're going?"

"If you really need to know, I was going to the bathroom. Now if you could move, that would be amazing."

Her facial expression is a shocked one, I don't think she has ever been opposed. If I remember, this is Ms. Shell. The most feared teacher in the entire school, no one dares to talk back to her because she loves to get us kids in trouble.

"Ms. Hearth, you may be a new student, but that doesn't mean you will disrespect me. You have detention with me after school, I don't care if it's your first day."

Anger boiled in me, who is she to try to tell me what to do? She has no right to order me around. I don't intend to listen to her. I don't have to, and I don't want to.

"What in the hell is wrong with you? You think I'm going to listen to old bat like you? Well go ahead, give me all the detentions you want. Just don't expect me to go to a single one. In case you didn't know, I may be new, but I know a lot about you. And I hate you, your nothing but stupid, ignorant, and stuck up. So take all your threats and shove it down your throat."

With that, I walk out the classroom with my head held high, and fierceness in my step. I looked back to see her face once more, pure white, my red eyes blazing. And a person following me. Devan, I almost lost my cool for a second, but began to walk again. He grabs my hand and stops me in the middle of hallway.

"Listen Flame, I know that you're new, but that doesn't mean you can talk back to the teachers."

"Excuse me, but I have to go somewhere! Let me go!"

His grip tightens on my arm, almost forcing me to punch him. I want to get away from him. He pulls on my arm, dragging me to a familiar place...my safe hole.

"Come on in here, we need to talk."

He gets out a key and turns the lock, how does he know this place, did he see me in here before? He pushes me on the floor, I land flat on my butt, pain streaks up my spine. A muffled cry leaves my lips.

"Kya! My back...what in the fleck is wrong with you?! Who do you think you are?!"

"I'm Devan, and I know who you are, how else do you think I found this place?"

Crossing my arms over my chest, I give him a "show me what you got look".

"Ok then let me explain everything. Your real name is Kelly Scott, you left here because I bullied you along with my ex-girlfriend Rita Flowers. You liked me, and your friend over there, Marcus, told me. You hated me and everyone in this school. Also to bring back what you looked like, short black hair, chocolate brown eyes that I loved. You were so quiet that no one talked to you. And you loved...no...still love dubstep music. But most importantly, I liked you."

Wow...he knows everything...wait he liked me?!

"I-I don't know what you're talking about. I'm a new kid, you flecking kidnapped me! You brought me in here to tell me your love story and some nerd of a girl that clearly isn't me, and now what?"

"Now what? Ok then, I'll do this."

He came closer to me, pushing me up against the wall, placing both his hands on either side of my head. He gives me that crooked smile that I loved so much. My body won't move, I can't escape from this, what have I gotten myself into?

"Hey! Can you, like, move?! I want to leave!"

"Oh no, I've been waiting to do this forever."

He brings his face closer to mine, making me extremely uncomfortable. What is he doing? He's been waiting to do this forever? Does he want to kill me?!

With topaz eyes carefully closed he comes closer, closer, until I feel the soft touch of his lips on mine, my body shudders powerfully, sparks fly down my spine, giving me goose bumps. My face burns, and my head is fuzzy, swimming and bathed in white. He pushes me further against the wall, forcing me to cling to him for support, his kiss was soft and gentle, like that of a butterfly's wing on my skin, but it changed. It became hungry, eager almost, he forces my clamped lips open. And the warmth of his tongue swirls with my own, I lose my ability to think altogether, my knees buckle, and he wraps his arms around my waist to help me. My thoughts in complete disarray, and my body limp as can be, I submit. He indulges in our kiss, breathing through his nose, not daring to let our lips leave the others. How long we stayed like that I don't know, all I know is that after he pulled back I fell weakly to the ground. My breath labored, and my chest rising and falling with effort. With burning cheeks I stand, using the wall for support, although my efforts are in vain. I collapse into a nearby bean bag chair.

"So...was that good?"

"Good?! Are you serious?! What the actual fleck?! You just stole my first kiss...and I barely even know you."

In all honesty, it was amazing, that was my first kiss and it was with the boy I wanted it to be with. But I still don't understand, he's been wanting to do this for a long while? So he bullied me for what reason? For enjoyment? Sick pleasures?

"Your first kiss huh? Well then Kelly, let's go."

"I told you, I'm not Kelly, my name is Flame!"

"Then how did you find this place, how did I immediately know that it was you?"

"First of all the principle gave me the keys, he said I could have a little private spot. Second, I have no idea, you said the other girl had short black hair with brown eyes right? Well I'm not her, I have red hair and red eyes! Forget it, I'm leaving, see you later you butt."

"Kelly! Wait up! Please hear me out, I-I wanted to apologize, listen, I'm really sorry."

"Sorry? For what, kissing me? Well I accept your apology, now I'd like to get to class, and for the last time, I'm not Kelly."

Chapter 5

Five minutes, five minutes before I can get home. Before I can change clothes, and eat as much as I please. I finally reached the front door, and dash up the stairs. I collapse onto my bed and close my eyes.

"For now, I should change my clothes."

I stood up, and kicked off my shoes. As I stripped down into my bra and underwear, my door swung open. Marcus...why is he here?!

"Dang! Hot chick alert!"

"Go outside!"

"I think I'll stay. Or better yet, I'll get closer instead."

He walked closer to me, gradually closing the distance between the two of us. He said hot chick alert, I never really thought of myself as more than normal. So what is he saying? Self-consciously, I look down at myself. I have what every girl has, nothing new at all. I turn away from him and grab my clothes, pulling them on I turn back around.

"Like I said, nice body and I like the panty choice, cute stripes. You hid all of that with your baggy clothes last year right?"

He's right, last year before the whole Devan accident, I wore clothes at least two sizes bigger than what I actually needed. Now I wear clothes that fit my body shape, I'm not exactly fat, but I do have a little on my stomach, not enough to make it bulge out. With a faint pink in my cheeks I give him a death glare.

"Why are you here again?"

"You forgot, normal Kelly Scott brain. You said you'd tell me everything if I came over, I never got a specific time, so I just figured I'd come over as soon as I got out and I'd run over here."

"How did you know where I live?"

"You really forgot everything huh? I've been at your house for at least ten times already."

Oh...I did invite him, now that I think about it. And he did visit me often when I told him I needed someone to talk too. The good old days, when I didn't have all this guilt on my shoulders. When I didn't feel like a monster. But those days are over, now that I've done what I did I can't change the past.

"Oh, yeah. I remember now. So what do you want from me?"

"Well... I would ask you to go back to the bra...but...that would be to mean. So instead, just spill."

So I did, I told him everything. Up to the hair dye even. He looked at me, and pulled me into a tight hug.

"You're not mad me? But, I tricked you."

"Kelly, I missed you, so I don't care if I was tricked or not. You're my best friend."

Best friend...I have a friend? Since he's my friend I have to tell him about the kiss.

"Hey, one more thing."

"What is it?"

"Devan kissed me today."

"WHAT?!"

"Yeah, in that old, abandoned classroom."

He dramatically puts his hand to his forehead and fake faints onto my bed. He's still as funny as ever, I did miss him.

"Do you want to sleep over? I miss us hanging out and fooling around."

"Sure, I'll ask my mom."

I run down the stairs, excitement in my step, and jump down onto the ground floor. I see my mother, as always, laptop in her hands.

"Mom! Can I sleep over at Marcus' house?"

She looks up, with deep bags under her eyes, and gives me a nod.

"Hope you have fun sweetie."

"Thanks mom, make sure you get some rest."

I tiptoe back up the stairs, I'm feeling mischievous today. I slowly open my door and assume cat-position. Crouching low, I stalk over to where Marcus is, he lies on my bed with eyes closed. I carefully get on the bed, it one of those quiet movement beds, so he can't feel the cushion falling with my weight. I rear up, and jump onto him.

"AHHHH!"

I hold on with all my might, and squeeze him as hard as I can. He kicks and pushes and squirms, I'm not letting go.

"Kelly! Get off me, your heavy!"

"Hey! That is hurtful, I only weight about...84 pounds."

"Still! I'm basically just skin and bones. Please get off me."

"Nope, I don't want to."

I squeeze him harder, I can hear the breath being sucked out of his lungs. And, along with the groans, moans of pain. I loosen my grip, changing from a death squeeze to a gentle hug. He gasps wildly, desperately trying to catch his breath. I felt it before I figured out what he was going to do. He slowly wrapped his hands around my waist, and then he tickled me. A trembling rush coursed through my body, making me let go of him. A squeal of laughter leaked from my mouth, and with a smirk of satisfaction, he let me go. My voice laced with hysteria, and still on top of Marcus, my thoughts are left to wander. The kiss today...I still can't believe it happened.

"Hey Kelly, when are you going to start packing for my house?"

"Right now, help me?"

"Sure."

I grab a duffle bag and head for my closet, he easily follows. Being the perverted boy he is, he heads straight to my underwear drawer. I watch him as he sorts through them, and picks the two he likes. Going to the second draw, he finds the matching bras.

"Having fun there?"

"Of course I am! Every boy wants this, even your boyfriend Devan."

My cheeks flush deep red at his words.

"He's not my boyfriend." I muttered, even though he liked me, and even though I may have feelings for him still, I just don't want to be hurt again. As he puts my underwear in my bag he pulls me into a hug.

"Don't worry, I can guess that you're scared, but I will do whatever I can to not hurt you. I mean, after all, I love you."

"I love you too Marcus."

Now I do love him, but not in that way, he's like a brother to me. He's my big brother. So I've been through tough times with, and without him. But he's here now, and I hope he won't let me fall and burn again. I need to stop getting so mushy, pushing aside my thoughts, I throw a pajama shirt and shorts, jeans, and shirts in there as well. I don't have a problem knowing that I'm sharing a room with my best friend, even if he is a boy.

"Hey Scarlett, what do you want to eat for dinner? My mom's asking."

"Do you really need to ask me that? You're my best friend, you know what I want to eat all the time."

"Yeah mom, she wants Asian food again. I know but she loves it, I can't do anything about it."

"What did she say?"

"That if you keep eating that you're going to get fat."

Hmmmm, now this poses a problem. Asian food is awesome, it tastes great and it's mostly vegetables or rice. The most amazing sauces and it's pretty healthy, if you know the people who cook it right. With that in mind, I dismissively loosen my grip on Marcus.

"Come on the food's going to be there in thirty-five minutes."

...

As I sat in his room on his bed, I just happened to see it. A little blue book, I've seen that book somewhere before...but where? I shake my head, trying to dig up the past memory that was nagging at my brain. I scratch my head, and even slapped it a couple times until I finally remembered. That's his journal! He writes homework and his daily life in there, he gave me permission to read it before, do I still have those privileges now? Hmmmm, I'll just read it.

I picked up the little book, the spine withered, showing its age, and the bright blue is now a pale cream in color. And it's quite heavy for a small book. I turn to the last used pages, and then find the two days before that.

"It's been a long time without Kelly by my side, I really do miss her. Her laugh, her shy attitude, cute cheeks. I love her, she's not just a sister to me, when I told her about my crush I suddenly felt those feelings vanish, and with them, the urge to get closer to her grew stronger. I've been so depressed without her, and my mom noticed as well and scheduled an appointment for me in a few days. I really don't want to go.

I've had the aching feeling that Kelly is going to come back soon, I feel asleep in Biology class and when I woke up I yelled "KELLY" for the whole class to hear. I was so embarrassed! I miss her, and I even remember that time I tried to kiss her! In that old, abandoned classroom, she played it off as nothing. But I know she'll come back, she has to...right?

The feeling's been driving me crazy! I love her, she has to come back, and she will come back. I'll have her by my side soon and I'll be sane again. My best friend, and hopefully my girlfriend."

"Wow...I-I never knew he had those feelings for me. Wait...does that mean I shouldn't have let him pick out my underwear? Or given him that hug? If he writes in this again tonight, I'll read it."

I set it back on the night stand, and lie down on the bed. As I close my eyes, I hear the door open and Marcus' voice reaches my ears.

"Kelly, the food's here...are you sleeping?"

He inches closer to the bed, I kept my eyes slightly open, just enough so that in the dim light he can't see me. I still have that hysteria in my system, maybe I can catch him again.

"Kelly, hey, wake up."

He slightly shakes me, trying to "wake" me up. I let out a fake yawn, and flutter my eyes open. I reach my hand out, and grab his wrist. I turn toward him, my most seductive glance in my red eyes.

"Marcus, come here."

He sits on the bed and lies down with me, he looks at me with uncertain eyes. I brought my face closer to his and gently pressed our lips together, his eyes wide open, are filled with shock. He trembles as he lays on top of me, I can feel his deep breathing on my nose. He opens his mouth slightly, and then sucks on my lips, and I close my eyes, only to feel him pulling away. His cheeks turn bright red, even I can see it in the dim light. He turns away and covers his face with his arm. Wrapping his arms around my waist, he lifts me easily, and pulls me into a strong hug. I hear his breathing, loud and strained, is he holding back? I give him one more kiss before I get off the bed and walk down the stairs.

"Kelly, did you- never mind."

Chapter 6

As I sat down at the table I was bombarded with even more questions than this morning. "Why did you do this and that?" "Were you forced?" "Should we tell your parents?" "Why did you change your name?" they were leaning on the table by now. Looking at their face I can easily see where Marcus gets his looks from. Both of them have brown hair, the same shade to be exact, his fathers' is hair is cut low, and his mothers' is long, past her shoulder, but Marcus has his long, even for a boy, it covers his ears and eyes most of the time.

"Oh! That's a lot of questions, ok first, I did it because I just wanted to look different. No I wasn't forced, I wanted to do this. My parents know I did this, they gave me permission. And that last one, I don't know how to answer that. Let's see, people bullied me, so I left for a while so I could get all of this done. I just didn't want people to know who I was so they would stop annoying me."

"Wow...well sweetie, we know that Marcus missed you, he got so depressed after you left. I even made him go to a shrink! It didn't work, I guessed he just missed his girlfriend." Mrs. Matthews said.

"Mom! She's not..."

He cut of his sentence short, even though he didn't say the last few words, we all knew what he was going to say. "She's not my girlfriend, but I would want her to be." What he wrote in the book crossed my mind..."I miss her..."

"Anyway! Let's dig in huh?"

At her words I ate like I hadn't seen food in a couple of years.

...

After we ate dinner I was surprisingly full, I couldn't eat anymore, although I did just eat a whole bowl of vegetables and rice. Very filling. I rubbed my stomach with a gentle hand, if I move too much right now I'll regret it later. I sat in Marcus' room, staring at the book, he was getting a fresh towel and shower cap for me. As I sat there, I thought back to the kiss I gave him earlier. The kiss with Devan was painful yet satisfying, and with Marcus, it was soft and gentle. His lips were soft and smooth...

"Hey Kelly, the showers ready, I already have the hot water running, you just have to jump in."

"Ok thanks."

As I started to get up but he placed a hand on my shoulder, he wants to tell me something I guess. And I have a feeling I know what it is.

"Kelly, about earlier..."

His cheeks turned bright red, and his eyes show naked emotion. And I shudder as I see the pleading in his eyes. He walks closer, and hugs me, hiding his face in my hair, he speaks.

"Kelly, why did you kiss me?"

"If I remember, you kissed back."

"Well I did but...you started it, so why did you?"

"Because, I wanted to. Now that I think about it, I've had feelings for you, but I just never spoke them out."

"Kelly..."

He tightened his grasp, and the air is forcibly being sucked out of my lungs. I run my fingers through his hair and tug on it slightly, a dead giveaway as to what I want next. He lowered his eyes, and brought his lips closer.

"Kelly, I love you."

As he said those words our lips joined briefly before he swirls his tongue with my own, he stays strong this time, not like before when he shivered and shuddered, but as I felt the overwhelming sensation of impatience. He lifted me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. His kiss became rougher and hungrier, I struggled to breath. And as his free hand moved to lift my shirt, he came back to his senses and put me down. Quickly realizing the situation myself, I left the room swiftly and almost slammed the door.

...

Ahhhh...hot water does things to a person. Calms them down, makes the less tense, and somehow, make them happier. A grand bath that was what it was. Rose petals in the water, with their scent in the air. Steamy hot water, soothing my skin, and the bath salts and soaps. Heavenly, I have no question about it, Marcus and his family are rich. He doesn't boast about it, like most spoiled brats do, he sits quietly and keeps to himself. Like any normal kid would, except for the fact that he's a major pervert. Looking at my chest instead of my face, smirking at the wrong times, and...

"Hey Kelly, you forgot..."

I lift my head and look at him with lazy eyes. It took me a second to realize that I was still sitting the bathtub...

"AAHHH! Marcus why are you in here?! I'm trying to relax!"

"Well...you forgot your clothes, so I just thought I should bring them to you."

Oh, now that I think about it, I walked out without grabbing my clothes or anything. Why did I run out anyway? My mind wanders and I rewind until I figure it out. We were kissing, and the mood changed, then he started to lift my shirt up...which reminds me, he's still in here isn't he?

"And it may help if you...covered up a little bit. I'm seeing things I'm not supposed to."

"Just shut up and leave the clothes on the basin top and go outside."

"You sure I can't stay?"

My cheeks burn with embarrassment, and I try to cover myself with my hands. But the hot water basically weakened me, my arms feel numb...

"Marcus... do me a favor. Drain all the water, and fill it with cold water instead."

"Ok, the water's making your limbs numb huh? I won't look, just try to bare it."

The water drains rather quickly, and in its place, a cold feeling takes its role in bringing my body back to life. As I finally get the feeling back in my limbs, I saw Marcus, with a strained look on his face. He struggled to walk, and his breathing was labored.

"Hey, are you ok?"

After that he fell, smacking his head against the tile with a dull thud.

Chapter 7.

What happened...I hit my head? It hurts. A firm and soft feeling comes to me, and I keep as still as I can manage. So if I remember correctly, I was giving Kelly her clothes that she left and the water was too hot...then I felt really dizzy, and I fell. So is she what I felt?

"Okay, he's not bleeding, so that means he's not in any immediate danger."

So, she really does worry about me? All those years, when I had her as a friend, she came back. And the feelings that I've held for her, they came back as well. And after dinner... is it wrong for me to still feel the way I do about her? My mind travels back to the kiss earlier. How soft her lips were, how she wrapped her legs around me, and how hot and soft her body felt...I'm feeling weird now. I try to move my body, and thankfully it works. I open my eyes and let out a little moan, and somehow, I manage to get on my hands and knees.

"Hey Kelly, what happened?"

Her eyes glass over and she stood shocked for a moment, then the tears spill from her eyes and she throws herself on me. Literally any other boy would die from this moment, but I think I know how to keep myself calm during something like this.

"Marcus! I was so worried! Are you ok, does anything hurt, should I call your Mom?"

My mom, is she crazy? If my mom heard about this, more importantly, she's not wearing much right now anyway... with tears falling freely from her eyes, I bring her into my embrace, cuddling her face into my chest.

"Kelly, did you really worry that much?"

"Of course I did, you mean everything to me Marcus!"

"Then that's all I need."

I stand up, and hold out my hand to help her up. I then wrap the towel around her body and kiss her on the head. I walk out of the room, only a faint dizziness around my head.

...

A few minutes later she walked into the room, a faint scent of flowers drift to my nose. Even with her pajamas, she looks attractive, with her red hair and eyes, her cute curves and her puffy cheeks. Everything about her screams sexy! I can't help it if I get a little...around her. She may be my "friend" but, I want her to be something else.

"Hey Buttercup, did you enjoy your shower?"

"Aside from you dropping on me, it was awesome."

Her signature smirk comes back, and with it, my desires. My secret desires to kiss her until my lips feel numb, my desires to know what her body feels like, my desires to have her all to myself. Now I have a choice, do I tell her how I really feel, or do I keep it to myself and take a shower? I don't know. I think I should tell her, I mean, she knows when I hide something, even if it has nothing to do with her.

"Hey, we need to talk about something."

"Shoot."

"I-I well, I love you Kelly, I've always loved you, but not in the way you think. Well maybe you are thinking in that way, or not. But, well, you see, what I'm trying to get out is... I like you, as more than just friends. So my main point is, will you be my girlfriend?"

Chapter 8.

Love...that's a word I've heard but never really had time to register in my brain. Marcus loves me, the boy that promised he would never hurt me or cause me pain. I believe him, I want to, and I have to. If his feelings are true, just like he said in his journal, then I believe him.

"Marcus, if it's you, then you don't need to ask."

With that his eyes light up, and he grabs me by the waist and lifts me until I'm eye level with him. And then he kissed me. Soft and gentle, yet filled with animalistic urges. He joined our lips, then entwined our tongues together, the soft warmth sending electricity down my spine and then spreading to the farthest regions of my body. We part lips for a brief moment, only to take a deep breath before coming together again. His hands wind their way up my shirt and slowly roll it up, he lowers me onto the bed and leaves me there so he can close and lock the door.

"Kelly, are you sure you want to go through with this? Once I start, I don't think I'll be able to stop."

Do I want to? Yes, I want to, I need him to prove that he really truly loves me, and this will be the way to do it.

"Yes, now keep going."

He nods his head, and gives me a reassuring kiss on the forehead before continuing. He kiss my collarbone, leaving kiss marks on my neck. My short gasps leave my opened lips, and his hands reach the edge of my pants. I gasp in surprise and look at him with uncertain eyes. He gives me one more kiss, before he finally reached my underwear. After he slid his hands in, I blanked out, my thoughts driven out by the intense pleasure he gave me.

...

Mm...I'm still tired. My mind travels back to the night before...I really did that didn't I? My minds wanders, and the memories of the previous night, and I really did what I did huh? I felt a slight rustling behind me, and an arm draped over my shoulders, Marcus.

"Morning beautiful, how did you sleep?"

"Good, I'm still tired though."

"Well I don't expect you to be jumping with energy after last night."

He smirks and a blush rises to my cheeks. This guy, he knows how to make me smile. I turn over, and kiss him. He jumps on top of me and hovers over me, with a smirk on his face he pulls off the covers, and I'm left to look at my naked body. I scream and he jumps off with a large grin.

"I didn't know I got fully undressed!"

"Well you did a lot of things, and I don't think you'd want me to tell you."

I glare at him and get off the bed, with a dull ache in my hips I stand. He watches me, with his beautiful brown eyes. I somehow managed to get dressed, so I walked to the bathroom. After brushing my hair and pulling it into a ponytail, I brushed my teeth, washed my face, and after scrubbing my face dry, I waited for Marcus to do the same. After wrapping his hand securely around my waist, a sudden, yet extremely pleasant aroma same to my nose. And I know exactly what it is.

"Well, look who finally decided to wake up. We made your favorite Kelly, pancakes!"

I jump up and down like a child, and squeal. Now don't me wrong, I may be turning 15, but I still love pancakes.

"Thank you so much! I love pancakes! I love you guys!"

"No problem sweetie, you know we're always going to be here for you."

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