There were two things I factually knew, one being; I undeniably have fallen into a position I've never been in before, devotion. The other; I know it is a path that'll lead nowhere.
Handing him my heart (which tends to feel things all too strongly) will consume whatever is left of my sanity.

"What if being with you consumes me?" I respond with a trembling voice, hands, and knees. That's when the tears begin to flow from my eyes. I don't understand why, but I feel so vulnerable.

When I lost my family I gained a mental illness in return, thereafter losing whatever 'friends' I ever had. I became used to feeling nothing, I became used to no sounds but music, and the only voice that ever spoke to me was my mind.
Now I'm afraid, deeply afraid, of gaining anything.
Because I know everything in life is temporary. Everything but melancholy, that always stays, even in my manic days.

His response was to kiss the tears off my cheeks, then he gently pressed his lips against my own. My closed eyes and the warm softness of his face close to mine blended well. I understood the pleasures and secrets lovers take to their graves, I understood what he had said before.
Sometimes you're not meant to think, just feel, so I stopped thinking and began feeling.

In me, someone who once described herself as a corpse not yet gone cold, it suddenly was spring.