SORA

Back at Aria, it's like things haven't changed since we left a few hours ago, unsurprisingly.

"It's fine if she wants to join the academy and I applaud her for it, but you'll be the one mentoring her," Kit points out as the five of us walk through the dispatch center.

"What?" Sander's eyes widen. "Why me?!"

"You're always slacking off. It would do you some good to learn discipline," Kit hums.

"Uh...guys..." Isabella weakly attempts to interject.

"Slacking off? The hell, Kit? When do I--" Sander's voice fades as the other three keep walking and Akari and I stay behind.

"Is it me or do I sense..." Akari trails off quietly as she stands beside me, her eyes flickering between the three of them.

"Jealousy," I finish. "Blatant jealousy. Yes, yes you do."

"But why would she pair them together then?" Akari raises a brow.

"Don't ask me," I shrug, clueless.

The two of us watch as Isabella, Sander, and Kit walk out of the center, Sander and Kit still arguing back and forth over Isabella, who stands timidly in the center of the chaos.

"Right..." Akari trails off. "Well, I'm going to go wash up and then head to class. You should do the same."

"Yeah," I sigh and stretch my arms out. "I know. Don't worry, I've got it."

"If you say so," Akari sing-songs. "I'll see you around, Sora."

"See ya," I wave her off before I sigh once more and head to my room as well.

On the way to my room, I deadpan whenever I notice Merrick standing outside in the hallway swigging down a bottle of wine, as per usual.

"Merrick, what the hell are you doing?" I sigh as I walk up to him.

"It's five o'clock somewhere, Sora. Bottoms up," Merrick grins and begins to lean his head back as he leans against the wall and attempts to down more of the wine bottle.

"People don't typically drink entire bottles by themselves at five o'clock, Merrick," I sharply remind him and snatch the bottle out of his hands, to which he frowns. "Come on, let's go."

Even though he can be a complete ass, whenever Akari told me about what happened to him, I felt like I could relate to him and I wanted to apologize to him. Maybe now I can get the chance to do that.

"Where're you taking me?" Merrick sighs as I drag him back to his room.

"You're going to sober up," I sigh and Merrick frowns slightly as I push open his door.

"Good luck with that," Merrick laughs dryly. "God, I'm a mess. Aren't I?"

"Well, that's one word for it," I sigh as I walk Merrick over to his bed before he sits down. "I'm going to go get you some water. I'll be right back."

"Wait--" Merrick starts and reaches for my wrist as I turn to go, making my breath hitch in surprise at his somewhat vulnerable expression. "Don't go. I'd...I just...I'm sorry."

"What?" I raise my eyebrows in surprise.

"I shouldn't have treated you like I did," Merrick sighs and lets go of my wrist to run a hand through his hair. "I let my pain get the better of me and I took it out on you."

"No," I sigh. "I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have judged you—"

"No," Merrick interrupts with a frown. "You were right. I'm a shitty person and you were right to be upset with me. I shouldn't have treated you how I did. I'm not— I don't normally do things like that. I let my personal feelings get in the way and I'm so glad I stopped myself because I'm not that person. I would never hurt an innocent person, and you didn't do anything wrong. I just— I let my hatred for the old Wrath tie itself to you and I shouldn't have. Funnily enough, that just made me hate myself even more because I hate people who just..."

"People who just judge you based on what you are or who they think you are rather than who really you are," I breathe out.

"Yeah..." Merrick trails off, his eyes meeting mine.

"Why," I clear my throat. "Why did you hate the last Wrath?"

I feel like I already know the answer, but I...I just need to know for sure.

"He..." Merrick frowns and grips at the bed sheets beside him, "he took the one thing from me in this world that I couldn't afford to lose. As you can tell, I've always been a bit of a problem child. I never really expected anyone to see me as anything more than that, so I didn't care how I acted around people. After all, they all hated me anyway, all judged me anyway, so what should I have cared? Along with that, I've never been any good at relationships. I've always pushed everyone too far away before they could get close to me because people have left me so many times that I didn't want to get left again, you know? It sucked, opening up to people only to have them leave you in the dust as if you never really mattered. Then, I met a guy who for some reason thought I deserved his company. He was another one of the sins, Gluttony, and he had a hell of a drinking problem but he never let it consume him somehow. He forced me to open up to him and he was kind, caring, understanding, strong, and genuine. On top of that, he saw through all of my shit. How the hell was I supposed to just not fall in love with him?"

"What happened?" I ask quietly.

"Things were great for a while," Merrick sighs. "He stood up for me, had no trouble standing by my side against anyone. He genuinely saw the good in me and the terrible in me and he loved them both and he was able to see through all the fronts I put up. He knew what was real and what wasn't and he promised me he wasn't ever going anywhere. He was the first person who I ever truly believed when they said that. Then, one day, Kit, Akari, Carmin, him, and I were called out to deal with Wrath because he wasn't supposed to be around the academy grounds any more. This was before the order was made to execute any born from him. It was after that incident that Carmin became headmaster and declared that law. Do you have any idea what it's like to have the ability to save the person you love the most but you aren't able to do it? I had to watch as he fell to the bottom of a ravine because of Wrath and I couldn't even fly to save him because my wings were shredded by arrows and blades. He was literally within reach of my fingertips and I couldn't even save him. I couldn't save the one damn person who mattered to me. If I couldn't do that, then what good am I at all? The one thing he made me promise to never do was to gain his drinking habits, along with making me promise to not shut people out anymore, and would you look at me now? I'm doing such a fantastic job!"

Merrick laughs dryly and I frown, my chest tightening.

"What was his name?" I ask.

"Reverence," Merrick breathes out quietly before his lips begin to quiver and his eyes water, "his name was Reverence. And I know, I know I broke my promises to him and I know I'm terrible, but I just-- I miss him so damn much and...and drinking is the only thing that makes me feel close to him, so I--"

"I don't think that's true," I start and Merrick freezes to look at me. "I don't think you broke all of your promises to him. I mean, you just opened up to me, didn't you? And I don't think he would want you to hate yourself. He seems like he was really amazing and I'm sure if someone that amazing loved you that it means you must be pretty amazing too. And, for you to be consumed by your grief but be able to pull yourself away from it before you became the very type of person you hated, that makes you strong. It doesn't make you weak."

"Thank you..." Merrick breathes out, his eyes widening in surprise before he smiles softly and swallows thickly. "That...that means a lot, actually, probably more than you know."

"I should probably go head to class," I start, "but if you ever want to talk to me, my door will be open. Promise."

"Thanks," Merrick smiles before he stands up with a sigh. "I guess I'd better go try and sober up or something. What a pain."

"But at least you're trying, right? That counts more than anything," I say and Merrick's breath hitches.

"Yeah..." Merrick breathes out, his lips slightly parted.

"I'll see you around, Merrick," I say with a wave as I turn to head out of his room.

"See you..." Merrick trails off, still lost in thought.

I sigh to myself and put my hands in my pockets as I walk through the hallways and to my soonest available class. I know I'm not my dad, but I still somehow feel responsible for his mistakes. I promise, I won't make the same ones he did. I promise that to both myself and to everyone else. It's up to them whether or not they see me for me or me for what I am in the end. All I can do is try to make things right. I will become a better person, I swear it.