~Kaylee

Writing down the last few lines, I closed my journal and let out a sigh of relief. Years of therapy did nothing for me but it felt so refreshing writing down my thoughts, my feelings, and my day in my journal.

Getting off my bed, I grabbed my phone and car keys and made my way downstairs where Rick was talking with Sophie, his girlfriend, in the living room.

“Hi.” I greeted smiling slightly as I walked into the room.

I was a bit rude the last time I saw her so I figured I should apologize for the whole drama that day.

“Oh hello, you must be Kaylee.” She smiled up at me.

“Yeah, it’s nice to meet you.”

“And you too. Your uncle has told me so much about you!”

I laughed slightly. “And you as well. I’m sorry about that day…I let my emotions get the best of me and assumed the worst when I saw you guys. I’m really sorry.”

“It’s OK, Rick explained everything. I should be the one apologizing, I just wanted to be there for him but I didn’t realize that I might have been inconsiderate.”

I smiled warmly at her and we talked a little bit for a while, she was actually a really nice person. Although, I couldn’t help notice how Rick mostly stared at her with so much…adoration? Glow? Warmth? Love? In his eyes. I don’t know exactly what it was but it gave me flashbacks of when a certain pair of grey eyes would stare into mine like that.

I winced slightly as the unwanted memory resurfaced. I’d never seen Rick with a lady so I couldn’t tell if he’s ever stared at someone this way, but considering what he told me, maybe she was different. And I was happy for both of them.

“I should get going for my usual Friday sessions.” I said getting up and walking towards the door. “I’ll be home by dinner!”

Stepping outside, the cold evening air hit me making me shiver slightly. Thankfully, I was wearing my hoodie. Actually, there’s barely a time when I’m not wearing them. At least, it’s getting close to winter so I won’t get weird looks from random people.

Getting into my car, I turned it on and drove off. I was a little late when I got there, taking my usual seat I scanned the room for a certain huge ball of energy, Izzy. I frowned when I didn’t see her but I waved it off. Maybe she was late or just skipping like me, I’ve skipped like two or more sessions. I barely kept record at this point.

Turning my attention to the lady talking about her life, I decided for once to actually listen to the stories of others. At the end of it, I actually found myself enjoying it. I mean it was really inspiring, each person’s testimony and experiences was unique and special. I even shared a bit of mine after a lot of convincing and encouragement.

I really was seeing the positive side of things lately and I loved every moment of it. I was about going when someone came up to me. It was the tall blonde that hosted the sessions, Helen.

“That was really beautiful Kaylee. I love that you’ve finally come out of your shell.” She beamed at me.

“Yeah. I never realized it but this place feels like a safe place.”

“I’m glad, looking forward to more sessions with you and everyone else. Noticed you hadn’t really been coming for some time but what’s important is that you’re back. Also, I’ve noticed you’re close with Isabella.”

“Izzy? Yeah, she didn’t come today.”

“She hasn’t been coming for some time too now. I figured you might not have known, she’s been really sick.”

My eyes widened as my smile dropped but I hesitated a bit not wanting to jump into conclusions.  “Well we’re all kind of sick…aren’t we?”

“Well yeah…I wasn’t told much. Her dad told me she hasn’t been doing too good and has been at the hospital.”

“What’s the name of the hospital?” I asked.

Izzy was sick. Sicker than she usually was anyway. If she’s been at the hospital, then it’s probably very serious. Cancer isn’t really a sickness you joke with in the first place anyway.

I actually really grew fond of Izzy, she was like a little sister to me. Maybe that’s why I was so worried.

Giving me the address, her room number and her name on paper, I thanked her and left.

I sighed in frustration as I realized visiting hours were already over and they wouldn’t let me visit her now. So I grudgingly went home and decided to visit her the next day, all the while barely sleeping as my mind kept wondering if she was OK.

The next day after breakfast, I was already on my way to the hospital with the address given to me.

“I’m here to see Isabella Dolores.” I said at the hospitals reception table.

“Who are you to her?” the nurse asked clicking away on her laptop, barely paying attention to me.

Much expected anyway, the hospital wasn’t exactly the best. While I felt Izzy deserves a better place, I knew that health care was very expensive. I only got the best because my uncle was rich enough to afford it.

“Her friend.” I replied.

The nurse didn’t say anything else, just told me the number of the room which I already had. I bet I could have walked in and just headed in there straight, no one would even question me.

Room 306. Room 307. Room 308. Found it!

Knocking on the door before opening it, I walked in and stopped in my tracks as I stared at Izzy.

She laid on the hospital bed, bunch of wires and IVs stuck into her. The heart monitor next to her beeped slowly. Her skin was scarily pale and she looked a lot fragile and smaller in the hospital gown she was wearing.

No one was there, I was assuming her family would be back soon. I didn’t want to seem like I was intruding especially since they didn’t know me, so I was going to make it fast.

Slowly and careful not to make any sudden noise, I walked over to her bed. The haunting memory of the times when I was in her position filling my mind. I hated this for myself and I hated this for anyone else, especially her.

“Ry?” I heard her call out weakly, her eyes shut close.

“No, it’s Kaylee.”

Her eyes blinked open, her blue eyes not seeming to have as much light and life to them as it was before.

“Kaylee? What are you doing here?” she asked.

I sat down on the chair next to her bed and held her hand in mine. “I came to see you.”

“Thank you” she managed a weak smile squeezing my hand slightly..

“Where’s your family?” I asked.

“Dad went to work and my brother is getting himself some breakfast, he’ll be here soon” she replied then later clarified. “My dad wanted to stay, but he has to work if he wants to pay the bills.”

My heart broke hearing her say that, I remembered when my mom struggled to pay my hospital bills.

I nodded. “Are you Ok though? What happened?”

“I really don’t know.” she mumbled. “Everything was going great…then I blacked out suddenly and then I’m here. More drugs, more chemotherapy, more pains. I don’t really know what’s going on since no one will tell me.”

“Why wouldn’t they?”

“It’s probably bad and they don’t want me to know…” she trailed off. “Thank you for visiting though, it means a lot.”

She smiled at me and I did my best to smile back without bursting into tears. Even when she was in this state, she still was the sweetest soul.

I made up my mind on what I wanted to do.

“Of course. And you’ll be ok, that’s a promise I’m making to you.”

She nodded. “Yeah, I hope. I hope God hears my prayers…I don’t want to…”

“You’re not.” I said firmly not letting her complete her sentence.

We talked a bit more, her voice was so low and slow unlike her usual cheery voice. After a while, she eventually slept off feeling exhausted and that’s when I left.

 Just as I was turning to the corridor, I bumped into someone and I felt something cold, liquid and sticky pour on me.

“Fuck! Are you blind! You spilled my fucking soda” I heard the person yell at me.

Boiling at the rudeness, I looked up to see who it was and give them a piece of my mind but ended up gaping when I saw who it actually was.

It was Ryan. From school. One of Christian’s friends. The cold guy. The mysterious guy. The moody one. You get it!

“You!”

“You!” we both said at the same time.

Ry? I remembered her calling out that name. Was it Ryan? He was her brother! How!? They were like the complete opposite of each other! Personality wise, Izzy was sweet while he was cold. Physically, I could see the resemblance a lot especially their bright blue eyes.

“What are you doing here?” He asked frowning.

The most words he has ever said to me. I wasn’t about to answer though, if I did he would probably connect the dots and figure out I have cancer. I mean, how would I explain how I knew his sister if I didn’t tell him we met at a cancer support group. I mean there’s the option of making up a story but ignoring him seemed easier and satisfying.

While it wasn’t exactly a big deal, I had never been keen on people knowing I had cancer. Plus, he was friends with Christian, he would definitely tell him and things weren’t exactly smooth at the moment. Besides if he was going to know, I’d rather tell him myself.

So to save myself from all that stress, I decided to swallow my pride and apologize even though he was the one at fault there.

“Sorry about that.” I said and immediately left not giving him a chance to say anything more.

Looking at the soda stain on my clothes, I rolled my eyes and got into my car. Maybe this was the reason he was always so grumpy.

I took my mind off him and drove off, he wasn’t important right now. What was important was getting Izzy out of that hell hole of a hospital and getting her better drugs and treatment.