~Kaylee

My eyes snapped open as I felt the sudden urge to throw up. Getting off the bed, I rushed to the bathroom instantly throwing up in the toilet.

Letting out a groan, I sat on the floor leaning against the wall trying to breathe. The pounding headache, the throbbing pain in my chest, the dizziness in my eyes and the sudden exhaustion coming down at me all at once.

I’m starting to think everything that happened yesterday was a bad idea. I mean running out of my house in the middle of the night while it was raining, basically running away without telling anyone and skipping my drugs like three times because as much as I hate them, I depended on them to get through the day.

Christian appeared by my side the next minute holding me up gently.

“OK, I’m taking you to a hospital.” He said.

I shook my head. “I’m fine, it’s probably because I was out in the rain yesterday.”

 “Kaylee, you just threw up blood and you’re telling me it’s because of rain?” He asked not buying it.

“Just take me back home.” I pleaded, my voice faint having no energy left.

I wasn’t going to a hospital, I didn’t need to be diagnose with cancer for the second time. I just needed to go home, take my drugs and pray I would be OK.

“Kaylee.” He pushed on.

“Please?” I begged. “My uncle knows what to do. I’ll be fine.”

With a long look, he sighed and grudgingly agreed.  An hour later after we were both freshened and packed, we were on the road back home.

Holding the necklace that had the initial of both our names as the pendant that Christian had gotten for me as a birthday gift, I sighed as I looked out the window.

Can nothing good ever last in my life? I can’t have a little break from everything without something going wrong.

I eventually slept off and when I woke up, I found myself tucked in my bed at home. It was dark outside so I must have been out the whole day. I slowly sat up still feeling my insides on fire. Tears sprung in my eyes and my fingers fisted the bed sheet as I tried to ignore the pains.

Every single time I fall asleep, I wished I wouldn’t wake up. When I was asleep, nothing else exists. No one, no pain, no memories, no nothing. I was free from everything for those little moments that I was asleep.

The door swung open and Rick walked in holding some pills and a bottle of water. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he gave them to me.

Normally, I would grimace or hesitate before taking them but they were the only way to relieve me of my pain. Taking them once, I drank some water and then put the bottle down.

“Thank you.” I mumbled dropping the bottle on the bed table. “Where’s Christian?”

“He left half an hour ago, I told him you would be fine and we needed to talk anyway.” he replied placing a hand on my forehead.

“There’s nothing to talk about” I stated coldly shifting away from his touch.

“There’s a lot to talk about. This could have gone a lot worse Kaylee.” he started and I rolled my eyes mentally preparing myself for this talk. “What you did was irresponsible and reckless.”

“Can we not have this conversation right now? My head feels like it’s going to explode any minute.” I said trying to control the anger bubbling inside of me.

“You wouldn’t be feeling like that if you hadn’t snuck out like that knowing fully well that you’re sick.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” I snapped. “You don’t have to remind me, I know. Do you think I want this? My parents, the nightmares, this stupid illness is driving me insane! You don’t know half of what I’m going through! Leave, stop caring and pretend like I don’t exist. Isn’t that what you’re good at? Isn’t that why mom is dead? You didn’t care so don’t start now!”

He sighed, the hurt showing visibly in his eyes but I didn’t care. “I cared about your mother Kaylee, I really did.”

“So why did you never pick up her calls? Never called her back? Never replied her texts?” I asked, my voice breaking slightly.

“I was stupid Kaylee. So stupid. And I wish I could go back in time and change everything.” He picked up the photo frame that had the picture of my parents and I when we were younger, I resisted the urge to yank it out of his hands.

 “She was my annoying older sister and I was her naïve and immature younger brother. I wanted freedom, I wanted to live my life and I didn’t want to be told what to do. Ever since my investment worked out and I was getting a lot of money, I lost myself so much.

I would go out every night to clubs, flaunt my money on my friends to show off, every morning was a new lady in my bed. I was so stupid and she tried to advise me, warn me, and care for me. When we got into an argument, I left. I left because I thought she was trying to control my life when she was only looking out for me.

So I changed my number and moved away. I did what I wanted, I got the freedom I had always wanted but it wasn’t as I expected. I wasn’t happy. I was almost going broke in fact. I thought over my life and realized she was right and I couldn’t find myself going back to her because I was ashamed of myself. I decided to take responsibility for my actions, grow up and be someone she would be proud of so when I returned, she would be proud of me. But I never got the chance, the chance to go back. The chance to apologize and tell her she was right, the chance to prove to her that I had changed and make her happy. I never got that chance because I had woken up to a call that…that she was gone….”

Wiping off some tears that had fallen off from his eyes, he continued.

“That’s why I took you in Kaylee. I wanted to make it up to her. Make up for those years I left you guys. Make up for those years I was stupid.” He said. “I know you hate me and you have every right to, I hate me too. But I want you to know, I’m sorry. I know I’ve apologized countless times, I just want you to know that I’m trying my best to make up for it. I know whatever I do may never be enough, but I want to try.”

By the time he was done, I couldn’t find anything to say. The hatred and anger that I had piled up for him suddenly melting away as I realized he really was saying the truth. He made a mistake, a big one at that, regardless he was sorry and was trying to make up for it.

After all, everyone makes mistakes right? I knew no amount of apologies could bring her back or change the past, but at least I knew now that he was making an effort. If I knew mom, she wouldn’t want me to stay mad at him.

So ignoring the pains, I moved closer to him and hugged him. He was a little surprised at first but slowly, he wrapped his arms around me hugging me back.

“It is enough though. You are trying your best, I just…don’t make things easy at times.” I pulled away laughing slightly.

“Thank you, it makes me feel a lot better that you understand.” He smiled at me.

“I shouldn’t have judged you and shut you out, I’m really sorry.” I apologized, I felt bad for the way I had been treating him since.

If you thought I was giving him a hard time now, then you needed to see me when I first came here. I would have thrown my own self out but he didn’t.

He waved it off. “You don’t need to apologize, I understood the pain you were going through.”

We lapsed into silence, neither of us knowing what to say next. Great, we made up, so what now? Just as he got up to leave, a certain somebody flashed through my mind.

“So who’s she?” I asked.

He looked confused as he sat back down. “Who?”

“The lady I saw yesterday, she’s pretty and you guys really seemed to be having fun.” I teased.

“Oh that’s Sophie, my girlfriend.” He smiled. “I’m sorry, I guess it seemed inconsiderate. She knew about your mom so she came over to be supportive I guess, it was a hard night.”

“How long have you guys been together? I have to meet her first to approve her.” I narrowed my eyes at him making him chuckle.

It’s funny how a day ago, I would rather eat dirt than care about my uncle’s love life. Now, I’m demanding to meet her.

“You’ll get to meet her, I promised. For now, you need to rest Kaylee so you can get better.” He pulled the duvet over me noticing I was shivering a bit.

“Yeah, I guess.” I snuggled into the warmth of the duvet, the feeling of exhaustion take over me once again.

“Goodnight Kaylee.” he said getting up as he switched off the lights before leaving the room.

Slowly, I let the sleep take over me.
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