Edited

~Kaylee

Falling on my bed, I stared at the ceiling as my fingers subconsciously reached up to touch my bottomed lip like it would bring back the sensation from the kiss.

The kiss…

Christian was a bit surprised when I kissed him, even I was surprised, but he quickly recovered and kissed me back. His hand back on my cheek and the other resting at the back of my head gently pulling me closer to him. As the inexperienced girl I was, slow and unsure, I placed one hand around his neck, the pother still fisting his shirt.

His lips felt warm on mine even with the cold air around us, the faint taste of strawberry lingering on his lips probably from the cotton candy we had. It was soft yet firm against mine, gentle yet demanding.

I didn’t know how much time had passed but when we both pulled apart, we were both slightly out of breath.

We didn’t say anything else even when we left, it wasn’t an awkward silence or anything. We both knew we needed time to process things.

I expected to feel guilty or even be angry, heck even blame him for making me feel that way! So why was I giggling and smiling like a high-school girl who just had her first kiss with her crush?

Maybe because you are?

Ok first, technically not my first kiss. The only other time I ever kissed someone was by accident in sixth grade, literally. I had no idea someone was behind me when I turned around and came face to face and lip to lip with some random boy in my class.

Could you really count that as a first kiss? I’m not sure.

Second, I did not have a crush on Christian! Sure I’ll admit, there was something but it wasn’t a crush. And that something was probably the drugs I was taking. All drugs have side effects, yes, side effects could include butterflies in your tummy and a racing heart.

I sighed and hugged my pillow, the small smile never leaving my face. All thoughts vanishing from my head as I slowly fell asleep, tonight, I was happy and he made me happy. That’s all that mattered.

Ding! Ding! Ding!

Throwing my alarm clock on the floor, I woke up with a scowl.

So much for being happy! How did the weekend go by so fast? Now I have to face that hell hole called school.

Forcing myself to get up, I made my way to the bathroom to freshen up. In thirty minutes I was ready as I made my way downstairs.

“Morning Kaylee.” Rick greeted with a smile as I entered the kitchen.

“It’s too early in the morning.” I grumbled as I took a seat.

Ignoring me, he danced as he flipped the egg on the pan before pouring it on a plate for me.

I eyed him suspiciously. He was usually cheerful but not as chirpy as this. Now that I think of it, he came home unusually late last night.

Shrugging it off, I ate my food and took my drugs. I rather stay oblivious, I’d probably puke if I got myself involved in my uncle’s love life.

Clearing my plates, I made my way outside where Christian was already waiting for me.

“Morning Gatita!” He chirped as I walked to the car.

“Seriously, you too? Who is this happy on a Monday morning.” I grumbled as I got in.

“Everyone except you?” He chuckled.

“Then you’re all weird.” I rolled my eyes.

He started the car and drove off. “Soooooo, about Friday?”

“Let’s not talk about Friday.” I said looking away as my cheeks heated up.

“Why not?” He teased and I groaned.

“Because I don’t want to talk about Friday, that’s it.”

“Are you embarrassed?”

“No, we kissed. No big deal, you were practically begging for it anyway.”

“If I remember clearly, I felt a certain someone drag me towards them.”

“So you’re saying it’s my fault?”

“Who kissed who first?”

“Well you kissed me back!”

“I mean, I didn’t want you to feel bad by leaving you hanging.”

“I don’t-“ I paused and then turned to look at him slightly hurt. “That’s really the reason...you kissed me back?”

Why did I feel...weird...because of what he said, I shouldn’t care!

Turning his head so he was facing me, he frowned.

“No, I kissed you back because I wanted to” He said with a serious expression on his face before he turned back to the road.

Pulling over the hood of my hoodie, I turned to face the window as I let my mind drifted away. A million thoughts ran through my head as I watched the passing scenery.

Shaking my head slightly, I pushed down those thoughts. Something I was beginning to do a lot lately especially since that night. I had no idea where this was going and what would happen next but I would go with it for now.

The rest of the drive there was silence once again.

“We’ll talk later I guess.” Christian said as the car slowed down to a stop.

Nodding, I got down and made my way to school.

Entering into the building, I was about making my way to my locker when I noticed something was different. They were all staring at me.

I wouldn’t say everybody, most people were going about their normal activities with occasional glances at me while the rest were openly staring. But compared to the way I usually was invisible, this was unnerving.

Not only were they staring, they were now whispering among themselves. They weren’t even trying to lower their voices. I could tell because as I made my way to my locker, I heard everything they were saying.

“I don’t believe it, it just seems crazy.”

“She’s still pretending even now, doesn’t she know her petty act is over?”

“What an attention seeker.”

 “I always felt bad for her but this is a whole other level.”

I opened my locker trying to block out their loud and obvious whispers, this was probably a stupid joke or it was someone else they were talking about.

“I feel bad for Christian, he has no idea he’s being manipulated by her.”

“What a bitch!’’

 I turned around frowning. What the heck was going on?

“That’s probably how she landed herself a date with him, what a pick me.”

“She probably wants him for his money or something.”

“I hate her.”

“She’s not even pretty.”

“Petty.”

My breathing pace increased as I realised they were talking about me, at this point they were throwing glares and insults at me while I stood there staring at them confused with no idea about what was going on.

The only thing I got was they somehow found out about our date and some kind of act I was pulling off. Closing my locker, I tried to push back the memories that was fighting to resurface. Maybe if I get to class, I wouldn’t have to listen to them anymore.

“What do you expect? Her parents died because of her, she’s that messed up”

I paused as soon as I was about to enter the classroom as those words registered in my head. Everywhere suddenly started looking blurry as I felt nauseous.

“I think you hit a nerve.”

“So it must be true, that’s why she moved here.”

“I feel bad for her.”

The rest of their voices were muffled as I ran to the bathroom barely making it in time before I hurled into the toilet. Taking deep and shaky breaths, I let the tears flow from my eyes as my body trembled.

I didn’t even realise there was someone inside the bathroom till Bella stood in front of me with a devilish smirk on her face.

“Are you alright?” She asked with fake concern, the smirk not wavering from her face.

I didn’t answer, I had no idea if I could even answer at all if I wanted to. It was getting hard to breathe as I clutched my chest in pain.

“Why?” was the only thing that came out from my throat. I knew it was her, after all it’s the exact same thing that happened a year ago and she was the cause of it.

As she stood over me, the evil glint in her eyes, I knew it was her again. What I wanted to know was why? What did I ever do to her?

“Tell you the truth, I mostly did it for a friend but it’s equally as fun watching the chaos unravel.” She laughed. “Don’t look at me as a bad person sweetie, bad things just happen to good people.”

I wanted to yell at her! Give her a piece of my mind! Make her feel the same pain? Heck just even demand an explanation and a reason. A reason why she keeps doing this, a reason why she hated me, a reason why I’m suffering all this but I couldn’t. All I could do was try to breathe, something my lungs seemed to forget how to do.

“Let’s keep this a secret.” Bella whispered and left the bathroom.

Breathe in! Breathe out!

Breathe in! Breathe out!

I kept chanting in my head but my lungs didn’t seem to follow. I couldn’t tell how long it would take but nobody was likely to come anytime soon because the bell for classes had already rang.

My whole body felt like it was on fire and my lungs felt like it could explode any second now. Nothing was working.

Slowly, my body started getting weaker and numb. I just laid there still as my vision started to fade, the never ending tears still streaming from my eyes.

I had no idea what I did to deserve this, but if this was the end so be it. Maybe I'd finally find the happiness I’ve been dreaming of.
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