I hated hospitals. They just spelled bad news. Almost 99% of the time that people are in hospitals, it's for bad news. The other 1% is for people having babies. But that could be bad news for some people, depending on how they viewed life.

It was just the feel of them that I can't stand. They're so...so clean. You would think that a place so clean would smell better. Ack, the stench. Of bleach and cleaning supplies. Of sterilized hallways.

And the fluorescent lights cast shadows on everyone's face, making even the healthiest person look sickly pale. The doctors walking by kept their heads down, not making eye-contact. As if if they looked into someone's eyes, they would see fear and disappointment; the lingering of death and bad news.

I sat outside the emergency room. My mother walked back and forth in front of the doors. They wouldn't let us in. Ian sat on one side of me, his hand resting gently on my knee. Mae sat on my other side, clasping one of my hands in her own.

I looked down at my hands now. They looked pale blue under the horrible hospital lights. Mae's looked a sickly yellow color. Ian's looked purple. I wondered half-mindedly what color my father's hands looked like right now.

Click. Clack. Click. Clack.

The sound of my mother's heels echoed in the silent hallways. I watched her pace worriedly. Her hair was coming out of its usual tight bun. I could make out the grey hairs. I saw worry lines plastered on her forehead. She kept wringing her hands and occasionally brush a tear from her eye before it could escape.

My mother never liked showing weakness. She was always a strong-willed woman with ambition; a true feminist, but with a conserative background. A living juxtaposition. When I was 7, we had travelled to South Africa because my parents were doing some charity work there with their law firm. They couldn't leave me at home because I was too young and my mother didn't believe in nannies. During the trip, I got bit by a mosquito and got malaria. I fell so ill and was taken to the hospital right away. I still remember the look on my mother's face when the doctor's strapped IV bags to my wrists. When she thought I was asleep, I heard her whisper, "My baby..." ever so softly. Whenever I got frustrated with her, I always thought back to that memory. She had a strange way of showing it, but she did love me. And I loved her, no matter how much I denied it.

The doctor walked out. He was wearing light blue scrubs, his face mask hanging underneath his chin. He wiped his brow as my mother approached him.

"How-" my mother croaked. She paused and cleared her voice. "How is he?" she asked him in a clear, strong voice.

"He'll be all right. The surgery was a success. I'll discuss the details with you later as I'm sure you'd like to see your husband right now," he replied. My mother nodded. I let go of Mae's hand and stood up to follow her.

"Can I visit him, too?" I asked the doctor. He looked at me with pursed lips.

"It isn't good for him to see too many people at once. I think your mother should go for now. We can't stress the patient so soon after surgery," the doctor replied. With that, he walked down the hall, his shoes squeaking slightly on the clean floors. I followed my mom anyways, but didn't go into the room. I stood a small distance, peering at the two as they conversed.

I smiled. If someone ever asked me what true love was, I would say what my mother and father had. They both cared deeply for each other. The only person my mother would show weakness in front of was my dad. And even though they fought all the time, they would make-up so quickly and without any drama. They were perfect for each other. I couldn't imagine what would happen to my mother if something had gone wrong in the surgery. My father was everything to her. She couldn't lose him.

I felt hands on my shoulders and looked up to see Ian.

"How's he doing?" he asked me, looking through the window.

"I think he's all right. He just looks really weak," I said in a quiet voice, staring unblinkingly at my parents.

"Are you all right?" he asked after a moment. I blinked and looked down at the white tiled floor. White, white, white. Everything in here was white.

"I'm fine," I answered softly. "If you don't mind, I kind of want to be alone right now," I told Ian, still not looking at him. I knew he wanted to protest, but he didn't. I heard the dull sound of his steps as he left the hallway, leaving me alone to my thoughts.

                                                                       ~~~~~~~~~~~

                                                                        {Ian's POV}

"How is she?" Mae asked as I sat next to her.

"She said she's all right. I don't think so, though," I answered. Mae leaned back against the cold, hard wall.

"I think she's just in shock. It was really unexpected," Mae said.

"Well, heart attacks don't usually come announced, do they?" I said sarcastically. I ran my hands over my face. It was nearly midnight. "I don't think I've ever seen her like this before," I said after a moment. I stared ahead at the blank white wall on the opposite side of us. Mae shrugged next to me.

"She always acts like she's so tough and like she doesn't care. But she does; she cares a lot. About everyone. She hates seeing the people she loves in pain. And she may act like she hates her parents, but I know how much she loves them. They may frustrate her, but in the end, they are her family. It's always scary when someone you love gets hurt. And this is her father," Mae said. She paused. "I can't imagine what would have happened to her if something went wrong..." she trailed off, shaking her head.

"How long do you think it'll be before she snaps out of it?" I asked.

"Snaps out of what?" Mae asked, her voice slightly harsh. "She's worried about her father, Ian. It's not like she's acting any different. Weren't you listening at all to what I was saying? She's the kind of person that cares too much. Just because she's let her tough-girl image down doesn't mean she's changed. Honestly, you two have been dating for almost a year now. How can you possibly not know how to read her yet?" Mae asked. She sounded angry. Her words stung, though. I frowned. "I had never talked to Vanessa before when she talked to me about my grandmother. She just sat next to me and was there for me. She didn't have to; she just was. And now we're best friends because it. She's always there for me and I try so hard to do the same for her," she continued. "If you do anything to hurt her, I swear to God, Ian, I will hunt you down myself," she threatened.

"I'm not going to hurt her..." I defended meekly, but deep down inside of me I felt guilt creeping up. I looked to my side to see Mae staring at me with an intense look.

"You have no idea how great of a girl you've got. And I have a feeling that once you do, it's going to be too late," Mae said. "She loves you, Ian," she said softly. I felt my stomach tighten and a pain in my chest. I closed my eyes and then opened them. I had to stop what I was doing to her. I couldn't lose her.

And that's when I realized that I had done the thing that I had never meant to do: I had fallen in love with Vanessa Laine.

                                                                             ~~~~~~~~~~

Vanessa walked into the waiting room. Her eyes seemed to have lost that bright blue spark they always had in them. It looked like someone put out the fire in her eyes. They were dark and solemn, like the expression on her face.

Mae stood and walked over to her, hugging her in a tight embrace. I saw her whisper something into Vanessa's ear. Vanessa nodded and pulled away from her. I saw fresh tears glistening on her cheeks. Mae reached up and wiped them off, rubbing her back comfortingly.

"Vanessa!" I heard someone call. I turned my head to see Caleb walking up with a bag of food in his hands. I watched as Vanessa's expression brightened a little. He set the bag down and pulled her into a tight hug. "I heard what happened. I thought you all might be hungry, so I brought food. Is he all right? How'd the surgery go?" Caleb asked. I felt anger boil up inside of me. She wouldn't let me come near her, and yet she let him hold her like that? Vanessa pulled away from him, saying something so softly that I couldn't hear. Caleb reached out and tucked her hair behind her ears, also saying something, no doubt telling her everything was going to be all right.

Cameron and Liam walked in, each carrying a bag of food with them, too. They went up to her and asked her how her father was and how she was doing. Then they all walked over to the benches where I was sitting.

"Hey, man. Have you been here the whole time?" Caleb asked, sitting down. I felt like punching him in the face. Instead, I nodded.

"I was with her when she got the call," I said.

"It sucks, doesn't it? She was so happy and then this happened," Cameron said. Caleb glanced at me. I had no doubt that he knew that Vanessa wasn't completely happy when the incident happened. She told Caleb everything and had probably told him that she was frustrated with me.

Vanessa's mother walked out to the waiting room. She looked like she had aged 10 years in the span of two days. She looked surprised to see how many people were there.

"Mrs. Laine, we're so sorry about what happened to your husband. Hopefully everything is fine," Liam spoke. She glanced at him, looking at him and yet not seeing him at the same time.

"He's fine. The surgery went fine," she said robotically. She blinked and looked at Vanessa.

"Vanessa, I think maybe you should go home and rest. You've been up for two nights now. Go and sleep a little bit. You can talk to your father in the morning," she told her daughter. Vanessa shook her head.

"No, I'll stay here with you," she replied. Mrs. Laine ran her hand absent-mindedly through her daughter's hair.

"Who brought all of this?" she asked, indicating the bags of food.

"We did. We thought you guys might be sick of eating the hospital food," Caleb answered. She raised her eyebrows slightly.

"Well, that was...considerate," she said slowly.

"I'll go and bring a change of clothes for us, Mom. I'm spending the night here with you," Vanessa said. Her mother looked down at her.

"Are you sure?" she asked. Vanessa nodded. "All right then," she agreed. Vanessa got up to leave.

"I'll go with her," I suggested.

"Good idea," Caleb said.

"No, I'll go alone," Vanessa said mechanically.

"Just let him go with you, Ness," Mae sighed. She shook her head.

"No, I can go by myself," Vanessa argued.

"Mae, how about you go with her?" Mrs. Laine suggested. Mae opened her mouth to protest, but then closed it. She shot an apologetic look towards me and stood up to leave. Vanessa kept her head down, not making eye contact with me as she passed. Why was she mad at me?

"I think it would be best if all of you went home. The doctor said that this many people can't be in the waiting room," Mrs. Laine told us.

"Of course. All the bets to you and your husband," Caleb said. She nodded at him and we stood up and left.

"What's going on between you and Vanessa?" Liam asked me.

"I don't know. She hasn't talked to me since she got the phone call," I replied. I had a pounding headache and the pain in my chest kept growing.

"Is she mad at you?" Caleb asked.

"She was a little frustrated with me. But she's always that way. I don't think it's enough for her to stop talking to me. Something else is definitely bothering her," I said.

"It's probably just shock. She probably doesn't want to be close to anyone right now," Cameron suggested.

"That's what Mae said," I replied.

"Then that's probably what it is," Caleb told me. "Don't stress about it. I'm sure she'll be fine once the doctor lets her see her dad," he added. I nodded. I just wanted to go back to my apartment and get away from that dreaded hospital.

                                                                           {End Ian's POV}

                                                                            ~~~~~~~~~~~

"How are you holding up?" Mae asked me when we got to my parent's house.

"I'm nervous and scared," I answered.

"There's no reason to be. Everything went fine," she reassured me.

"I think it's just the after-effects," I told her. She nodded.

I went to my mom's room and pulled out her black Juicy sweats and a tank top. I went to my room and found a pair of black PINK capri sweats and a red t-shirt and changed into them. I threw my clothes in the laundry hamper and we left to go back to the hospital.

"Are you mad at Ian?" Mae asked me as she drove back to the hospital. I shook my head.

"No, why?" I asked.

"You've been ignoring him," she said.

"I just...I wanted to be alone," I said. "And I told him that," I added.

"Yeah, but then you go and hug Caleb right in front of him," she said. I bit my lip.

"Caleb's one of my best friends. I hugged you, too," I said.

"Ian's your boyfriend," she pointed out.

"Why are you taking his side?" I asked.

"It's not about taking sides, Ness. He's your boyfriend and I'm sorry to say, but you treated him like crap. He was with you at the hospital for two days. He never left your side," she told me. I frowned and then sighed.

"I don't know why, but I'm afraid to get too close to him. I hate being so vulnerable," I said.

"But you were able to let your guard down with Caleb and me," Mae brought up.

"It's a different level of intimacy, I guess. You guys are friends. He's something more," I said. I sighed again. "I've only had a handful of relationships, but I feel like this whole thing with Ian moved so fast. I don't know if I'm ready to let him in on that level yet," I explained.

"You two have had sex--" Mae began.

"That's not what I mean. I mean, letting him in on that emotional level," I clarified. She pursed her lips. "I want to slow down a little bit. And right now, I want to focus on being there for my family," I said.

"I get it, I guess. And yeah; maybe you do need to focus on your mom and dad right now. They need you," she said. I nodded. She pulled up in the hospital parking lot and we went inside.

After my mom changed into the sweats, we ate the food that the boys brought for us. Then all three of us went to sleep on the uncomfortable chairs in the waiting room of the hospital.

                                                                     ~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, the doctor let me go in and see my dad. I walked in slowly, part of me excited to see him, the other part scared of looking at his weak form.

"Good morning, Dad," I said, standing by his bedside.

"Hey, kiddo," he said. I smiled slightly. He hadn't called me that in a while.

"How are you?" I asked.

"Eh, I've had better days," he replied, chuckling slightly. "I'm just going to have to be careful of my diet from now on. Your mother said she's going to follow the doctor's orders to the point. I guess no more late night snacks for me," he said. I laughed lightly.

"I'm glad you're OK, Dad," I said, my voice cracking a little and my eyes watering slightly.

"Awww, hey. I'm perfectly fine. Don't be like that," Dad said, pulling me into a hug. I cried softly into his hospital gown. It was so strange, seeing him so weak. He was always the big father that was always there for me. He was the figure of strength in my eyes and seeing him so fragile, so pale, so weak in a hospital bed just broke my heart.

I pulled away, sniffling a little bit.

"Doctor also said that I shouldn't be too stressed about anything," he told me. I broke into a watery smile.

"Sorry, Dad," I hiccupped. He chuckled again.

"Go ahead and call your mom in," he told me. I did as he asked. I spent the whole day by his side, talking to him about the band and the things that had happened to me in the past year. He listened to every word and gave his commentary.

"If that boy does anything to hurt you, tell him that even though I've had surgery, I can still break his neck," he said when I told him about Ian. I laughed.

"There'll be no need for that, Dad," I said. The doctor walked in at that moment.

"All right, Mr. Laine. You are free to go," he said.

"Thanks a lot, Doctor," my dad replied curtly. He got changed into his clothes and I picked up his medicine and his diet instructions. I told Mae that I was going to live at my parents' place for the next week or two, just to give my dad company since he wasn't allowed to be back at work yet. I thanked her for being there and told her I'd call her later on that night. I knew that I would have to talk to Ian soon, too. I had to apologize for being such a jerk to him. I resolved to talk to him after the band meeting with Paul the next day.

______________________________________________________________________________

A/N: Hey, WOAH. This was a long part. I better get lots of votes and comments and stuff on it. =)

Yay for Ness's dad being all right! Yay for Ian loving Ness! Yay for friendship!!

=)

XOXO