Emyln

When I get home from Val's house after a delicious Spanish-themed dinner and an even better night with my best friends, I see two suitcases and a big hockey bag lying on the tile floor of the basement.

I stop, dead in my tracks, and frown. What the hell?

This scene reminds me all too much of the night Rosa, Dad, and I left for Abbotsford, and I don't like it. For some strange reason, it makes me think that in the time I was at Val's, Mom decided it would be a good idea to move. Meaning I'd have to give up all the hard work I've done with getting Hains back and go with her.

But then I shake my head. The situation is different now. For starters, I'm nineteen – an adult. I have money, a car, and a job, which all grant me the pleasure of having the option of buying my own apartment. I breathe a sigh of relief. I'd be just fine.

Mom comes around the corner that leads to the laundry room. "Emyln!" she exclaims, resting a hand over her heart. Some clothes fall from her hands. "I wasn't expecting you home so early."

I glance at the clock above the potted plant in the hallway – it's almost midnight. I wouldn't call that early, but I don't say anything because my mother is clearly frazzled. "Uh, yeah, the food that Val cooked was way too good and Hains and I ate too fast. So here I am." I gesture to the mess. "What is all this?"

Mom lets out a huff of frustrated air. "Joel has a training camp for hockey to go to in Vancouver, and, of course, we've left the packing until the last minute."

I hold back a laugh of disbelief. My mom procrastinating? Oh my God. Have pigs started to fly and no one told me about it?

I'm just about to ask her what hockey camp this is and why Joel never mentioned it to me this morning when we chatted about how we're excited to see what the Canucks are going to do this season, when there's a knock at the door behind me. I frown. Who the hell is here at this time?

I wander over and open the door, a big smile taking over my face when I see who's on the other side.

"Hains!" I say, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him inside.

He stumbles in, but the smile doesn't leave his face. "Figured you'd want your sweater and hat back – you left them at Val's."

I nudge him. "You could've brought it to work tomorrow. It's not like I was homesick for these particular items."

He shrugs, and my smile broadens – he totally wanted to see me again.

"Hello, Hainsey," my mom says.

"Evening, Mrs. Brantford," he replies like the gentleman he is.

Mom lets out a small laugh. "Please, we've known each other long enough – call me Nora."

I watch Hainsey's reaction. His bottom lip juts out a little, like he's thinking, and his brows form a small crease. He then proceeds to shoot me an amused look. I roll my eyes, knowing he's referring to the comment he made at Val's about how my mother clearly loves me or else she wouldn't have kept the skates. Hains also said that, and I quote, 'Even though she did some horrible shit, you should be thankful you have a mom that cares about you.' And I guess he's right. My mom could have decided she didn't want to settle down after the divorce and then go around hooking up with any random guy that would take her. But that's not what she did because here she is, trying to make amends.

Life has a funny way of working.

"I'll try to keep that in mind," Hains muses.

Just as I'm about to ask Hains if he wants to come up for a glass of water or something, Joel comes walking down the stairs with an armful of hockey gear that smells about as good as a dumpster even though it's been airing out all day. It's not the best smell, but as I said before, I'm familiar with it. And so is Hains. Mom on the other hand? Not so much. She wrinkles her nose in disgust.

"Hainsey," Joel says, his eyes lighting up.

Hains smiles, and then walks over to my stepbrother. They exchange the typical man hug, along with the hard clap on the back, and then delve into a conversation about the upcoming camp Joel is going to in Vancouver.

"Yeah," Joel says. "It runs from the eight to the eleventh. Thanks again, man, for getting me into it. I owe you big time."

Hains shrugs. "No big deal. If you ever need me to pull some strings again, you know who to call."

"Pull some strings?" I frown. It's all I can do to stop myself from laughing. I think my stepbrother has a man-crush on my boyfriend.

"Mhmm," Joel answers, sounding like a freaking kid on Christmas. "The camp was full, but Hainsey managed to talk to the right guys and make room for me. As I said, I owe him big."

"Oh," I say, startled. Questions begin to pop up: How exactly did he manage this? Why isn't he the one going to this camp-thing? When am I going to hear back from the university? "That's really awesome."

The boys nod, and then we all fall into a moment of silence. Out of curiosity, I glance at my mom. She's still holding the clothes in her arms, but they're the last things on her mind right now because her eyes keep flittering back and forth between me and Hains. I squint at her. Goddamn her. I know that look. She's totally picturing the two of us getting married in the future and all that shit. Not that I don't want to – God, I'd love to become Emyln Juliette Stone. I just think it's way too early to daydream about that. Besides, isn't it my job to daydream about my future?

"Well," Hains says, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "I see you've got a lot of packing to catch up with, so I'll be on my way." He gives Joel one more clap on the back, wishing him good luck, and then says goodnight to my mom.

When he's standing beside me, our shoulders pressed together, he looks down and winks at me. I hold my breath, hoping he's going to give me more than a wink as a goodbye.

At first, he's hesitant, but when that fades, he leans down and plants a kiss on my forehead. His lips are warm and soft and I instantly feel my knees begin to wobble. It's a simple kiss, yet it holds a lot of promise for what's to come.

"See you around, Ems," he says.

And just like that, he's gone, leaving me behind with my forehead tingling and my mom staring at me. I don't know where Joel went, but I don't care.

Mom grins at me.

"What?" I ask, my cheeks reddening.

"Nothing," she replies. "You two are just adorable together."

I roll my eyes and pull on the hot pink hat that Hains handed over to me. To say I'm embarrassed is an understatement. Mom has known him since we were kids. She's dealt with the two of us having the flu and vomiting all over the place, she's experienced him breaking my nose, she's seen us laugh until we were ready to pee ourselves. And that's the embarrassing part – she clearly saw the signs that we were going to be more than friends at some point long before I ever did.

"I'm going to bed," I say as I walk over to the stairs.

"Wait," Mom says.

I stop and look over my shoulder.

She hesitates, shifting the clothes in her arms. I wait patiently for whatever she wants to say to me.

With a deep breath, Mom says, "We're going to Vancouver for three days. Me, Landon, and Joel. Miles is staying at his mom's house for the remainder of the summer, meaning we're dropping him off in Squamish. Would you like to come with us? It'll be for three days."

I contemplate her words for a moment. Maybe going and getting to know my mom and her new husband would be a good idea. But that would mean missing my boyfriend's birthday. For the amount I've missed, I want to stay here and make up for it. So I shake my head.

"I would love to," I reply, surprised at how honest my answer is. "But Hainsey's birthday is on the ninth and I don't want to miss it." I look down at my socked feet and trace my toe along the knotted wood of the bottom step. "It's his nineteenth."

Mom doesn't show a bit of disappointment. Thank God. I was scared she was going to guilt me into coming with them. "I understand, honey. He wouldn't want to celebrate his birthday without you." She pauses and drops the armful of clothes into the suitcase before walking over to me. Stopping in front of me, she begins to talk again. "Since we're leaving early tomorrow morning, I probably won't see you in the morning..."

She hugs me as she trails off.

The gesture catches me a little off-guard, but I eventually hug her back. It's another baby step. Our relationship will never be the same as it was before shit went down – that's a given. There is, however, a way to mend our relationship enough that it somewhat resembles what we had.

"Yeah," I say. "Well, have a safe trip and I'll see you when you all get back."

Mom smiles and squeezes my shoulder before turning back to the suitcase.

And just like that, my mind wanders back to the tingling on the skin of my forehead. Good God. I hope it never goes away – it makes me feel buzzed.

As I'm getting ready for bed, I think about how long my mom is going to be gone. Three whole days of having the house to myself. I start to think about what I could do. I never had the chance to throw a party while I was in high school so maybe I could do that. Or...my head starts to spin with ideas about what I could do on Hainsey's birthday. I had originally been planning to spend the day hiking because he loves it so much, but maybe I could make things feel a little more special. Perhaps a day of hiking and then I could make him dinner at my house? Or maybe we could come here after going out for dinner and –

I have to cut myself off at this point. Yeah, I've been thinking about losing my virginity to him for a long time, but I don't even know if he's ready yet. It's not like it's just my decision. So I can't get too excited yet.

Clicking off my lamp, I close my eyes and try to fall asleep.

But my mind doesn't want to shut off.

I just can't wait until the ninth.