Family

Ilang araw ang lumipas matapos ang confrontation ko kay Logan. I tried to move on with my life. It wasn't even a break-up, and yet, durog na durog ang puso ko na parang kahit anong gawin ko ay hindi na ulit ito mabubuo.

Ganito ba kasakit ang break-up? Ours wasn't even official. But, my heart is officially broken by Logan Maxwell.

I failed. Ako dapat ang dudurog sa kanya.

He succeeded yet again. He managed to break me with his hands all clean.

"Bal, anak, okay ka lang?" Tanong ni Yaya Nelly sa akin nang mapansin niya sigurong tulala ako sa harap ng hapagkainan.

Tumango lang ako sa kanya.

It's been days and I haven't really been eating anything. I mean, it was nothing new. I used to not eat as much before. But, now, I just couldn't eat anything at all.

"Masama yan, anak. Kapag hindi ka kakain, magkakasakit ka," paalala pa ni yaya sa akin.

I knew that already. But, no matter how much I wanted to eat, I just couldn't.

"Sorry, ya," I mumbled, looking at the plate in front of me.

It was a plate of basil pesto pasta, a favorite of mine.

Pinilit kong isubo ang isang kutsara ng pasta. I chewed it in my mouth repeatedly, until I could no longer taste it.

In fact, parang nawalan na rin ako ng panlasa nitong mga nakaraang araw.

My weight dropped from 38.9 kg to 38 flat. Normally, masaya ako kapag nalalaman kong bumaba ang timbang ko.

But this time, I felt nothing.

It was weird because I didn't think Logan Maxwell had such impact in my life.

I shouldn't let him dictate my life.

I had to move on.

He already slapped me with the reality that he would never like me.

I knew he would never like me back.

Bakit pa ako umasa?

"Bal? Oh my God! Is that you?"

A high-pitched voice of a girl broke me from my trance. I didn't even have to turn around to know who she was.

"Yaya Nelly! How are you po?" bati ng aking kapatid kay yaya na nakatayo sa aking harapan.

That's when I saw her in the flesh. Wearing her signature Chanel sunglasses over her head, she flipped her hair as she flashed me a smile.

"Ate Bri, I didn't know you're coming home," I deadpanned.

Lumapit si ate sa akin saka niya ako niyakap. She smelled like a garden of white roses.

"I wanted to surprise you, of course," she answered, handing me a box with a logo of Tiffany and Co.

Binuksan ko ang kahon at nakita ang isang silver watch. Galante talaga si ate magbigay ng regalo kahit pa noon. It was something she got from our dad.

"Thanks," I just said.

"Do you like it? You don't seem like you do," she commented. "Are you alright?"

I forced a smile at her. "Okay lang ako, ate. I'm just tired from rehearsals. I'll go to my room now."

"Ganun ba. I was thinking maybe we can go somewhere. But, okay. I'll let you rest for now, then," Ate Bri pecked my cheek before I left the dining area.

Bumalik ako sa aking kwarto at humiga muna saglit. I didn't expect to see my sister today.

Ate Brianna and I used to be really close. We were partners in crime. We did things together. She would defend me from mom. She was my only friend, my best friend.

But, everything changed one day.

She fell in love, until she slowly drifted away from me.

Naiwan akong mag-isa sa playground, sa canteen, sa campus.

I was by myself because no one would want to be friends with a fat and ugly girl.

That was the time mom and dad's relationship was on the rocks.

Sinama ako ni mom papunta sa States at doon ako nag-high school. I thought everything would be different.

But, it was the same. I was bullied even more because of my race.

Everyday akong umuuwing umiiyak to the point na ayaw ko na ring pumasok sa klase. I would rather stay home than be in hell.

Until one day, kinausap ako ni mom at sinabi niyang ipapa-surgery daw niya ako. They would "enhance" my look the way I want it to be.

Of course, I had to agree... even though I was shit scared of my life.

What if hindi na ako magising after the surgery, right?

I was only seventeen then, about to turn eighteen.

But, when you're standing between death and hell in the real world, the most obvious choice was to risk dying.

So, that's what I did.

When I woke up after hours of surgery, I was a completely different person.

I went from a hippopotamus to a giraffe. Weird analogy, but you get the point.

Anyway, weeks after that, dad and Ate Brianna finally saw the "new" me. And they weren't the least bit happy.

I was finally considered beautiful and yet, they didn't like it.

That's when I started feeling distant from my sister. It didn't help that she had to go to the States with dad as well.

Fast forward to now, I still feel a bit awkward with her.

Hindi ko alam kung mababalik pa ang dati naming closeness. But, I sure hope so.

#

Last day of classes ngayon bago ang Undas break. Wala rin kaming rehearsals para sa play.

I decided to go to SugarPlum Studio dahil ayaw ko pa namang umuwi sa bahay. Ever since umuwi si Ate Bri, lagi silang lumalabas ni mommy. Ini-invite naman nila ako pero hindi lang ako sumasama.

Mas mabuti pang mag-practice nalang ako kaysa maging third wheel sa kanila.

Nilapag ko ang aking bag sa sahig nang makarating ako sa isang private room sa ballet studio.

Nagpalit na rin ako sa aking usual baby pink leotards bago ako nagsimulang mag-warm up.

"Ballerine, you're too stiff again."

That voice echoed in my ear. Pinilit kong balewalain ito habang inuunat ko ang aking leeg.

Sinunod ko namang ni-stretch ang aking mga kamay at binti.

Sa tuwing nandito ako sa ballet studio, nawawala lahat ng stress sa katawan ko. Dito lang ako nakakapag-isip ng maayos.

Tahimik at walang ibang tao. It was my peace in all the chaos in my life right now.

RING. RING. RING.

My phone suddenly ruined the silence in the room. Nakalimutan ko palang ilagay sa silent mode ang phone ko.

Kinuha ko ito mula sa aking bag at doon ko nakitang si Manong Eli pala ang tumatawag.

"Hello, kuya, bakit po?" sagot ko.

"Hello po, ma'am. Hinahanap kayo ng mommy niyo. Inutusan akong sunduin ka dahil hinihintay ka nila sa isang restaurant."

I closed my eyes in frustration. Kakarating ko lang dito sa studio tapos inutusan pa talaga niya si kuya para hindi ako maka-hindi.

"Ma'am, pasensiya na po. Nandito na po ako sa baba. Hintayin ko nalang kayo."

Bumuga ako ng hangin. "Sige, kuya."

Taking my bag, lumabas na ulit ako ng studio at hinanap ang kotse namin sa parking lot.

Malapit lang ang restaurant kung nasaan sina mommy kaya nakarating rin kami agad.

With my cream knitted cardigan over my leotards and black wrap skirt, I stepped out of the car and walked inside the restaurant.

The one she chose was a rooftop seafood restaurant inside a five-star hotel. Favorite ni Ate Bri ang seafood kaya kahit na hindi naman talaga kumakain si mom nito, dito pa rin kami pumunta.

Mag-isa palang si mommy sa table nang makarating ako.

"Why are you dressed like that? Galing ka ba sa studio?" panimulang bati ni mommy sa akin nang akmang bibigyang ko siya ng halik sa pisngi.

"Yes, mom," sagot ko bago ako umupo sa tabi niya.

"Hindi ba malapit na ang show niyo? How's that going?"

I never confronted mom about what she did about donating to the Theater Society. Whether she had something to do with me getting the lead role or not, ayaw ko nalang siyang tanungin.

"Okay naman po ang rehearsals namin," I mumbled, glancing at the bulb lights hanging above us. Medyo palubog na ang araw at kita rin namin ang sunset mula dito sa taas ng building.

Habang nakatingin ako sa malayo, biglang may tumapik ng aking balikat kaya napatingin ako sa aking harapan.

Standing in front of me was my sister wearing a white satin cami dress, accentuating her perfect curves and long legs.

"I'm sorry, we're late," Ate Bri apologized as she greeted mom with a peck before sitting down.

"We?" I repeated in confusion.

Ngumiti naman si ate sabay kaway ng kanyang kamay para tawagin ang kanyang kasama.

As soon as I looked over my shoulder, nakita ko ang kaisa-isang lalaking nagnakaw at pumatay ng aking puso.

What the hell is he doing here?

"Good evening. Nice meeting you, ma'am," Logan greeted my mom before sitting on the chair across me.

Nanginginig ang mga kamay ko habang nakatingin sa lalaking hindi man lang makatingin sa akin.

Kasama rin niya si General Maxwell na nakasuot ng coat and tie na parang a-attend ng meeting.

"Sorry, na-traffic pa kami," unang pagbati ni General sabay halik sa pisngi ni mom at umupo sa tabi nito.

Wait, what the hell is actually happening right now?

"That's fine. And finally, I'm meeting your son for the first time," mom stated, looking at Logan.

Ngumiti naman si Logan kay mom. Nang mapasulyap siya sa akin, pinanliitan ko siya ng mata. I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

"So, when's the tentative date for the wedding?" Ate Brianna suddenly asked.

Nalaglag ang panga ko sa aking narinig. "Wedding?"

I heard mom stifle a chuckle. "We still have to plan a lot of things. But, it will happen. That's why I want you all to be here."

"Hindi na ako magpapaligoy-ligoy pa, mga anak. Mahal ko ang mommy niyo at mahal rin niya ako. Alam kong hindi madali para sa inyo na tanggapin ako bilang ama ninyo pero sana ay tanggapin niyo ako bilang bagong parte ng buhay niyo," General Maxwell stated, sabay lingon kay mom na katabi niya.

Ngumiti naman si mom habang tumatango sa aming direksiyon. "I hope you will give your Tito Raymond a chance, girls," she told me and Ate Brianna.

"Of course, mom. As long as you're happy," sagot naman ni ate habang hawak ang kamay ni mom.

Unti-unting nag-sink in sa akin ang mga sinasabi nila. At unti-unti ko ring naintindihan na wala na talagang pag-asa ang feelings ko para kay Logan.

I don't mind mom loving another man. Pero, bakit sa dad pa ni Logan?

A/N: Welcome back Bri! And wedding soon... 👀