I can't believe this is the second to last chapter...

"Can I just-" James let his gaze flicker up for a brief moment so he could meet eyes with George. It was clear that they couldn't have been just friends- James looked like the polar opposite of George. Whilst George was clad in a pair of tracksuit bottoms and an Adidas jacket, James was wearing skinny jeans and a black band t-shirt. "I just need some pills. Nothing else."

"Oh yeah?" George rummaged around in his pocket but it was apparent in the mischievous glint in his eyes that he wasn't looking for what James wanted. When he pulled out a clear bag with something that most certainly wasn't adderall, James felt like he was going to throw up.

"Come on, I'll give you the money for adderall but not-"

"Not weed? And how do I know you actually have money this time?"

James let his eyes cast down to the green stuff, though it didn't calm the nausea in his stomach. "I don't do drugs like that and- and I have money, I swear."

"Are you saying adderall isn't a drug? You're addicted, mate. That much is obvious. How is doing weed any different?"

"I don't," James slipped his trembling hands into his pockets to hide them from George. "I don't want to get high. I just want the withdrawal symptoms to stop. I can't take it anymore."

"Sure but I don't have adderall today."

"But I specifically ordered-"

"Sorry, I can't get the next prescription for another week. It's either weed or nothing. I promise you the high is worth it."

Deciding he didn't have much choice as he hadn't taken anything in much longer than he wanted, James snatched the bag from George's hand. "Fine but I'm not paying full price."

George couldn't hide his smile as he accepted the discounted money from James. He knew exactly what he was doing.

Once James had paid, he practically ran down the alley in the direction of the school. Tears clouded his eyes, making it difficult to see through the blur but James knew the school better than anyone. He found his way back to his dorm where he slammed the door and locked it behind him. He didn't waste time before rolling the drug and taking it, though what he was doing didn't settle in until it was too late.

Within the hour, he was gone. Suddenly, school didn't matter. Keith didn't matter. The world didn't matter.

James laughed so loudly that it seemed to shake the room. His entire body was trembling but there was a buzz deep inside his chest that made him feel unstoppable. All the pain he had been subdued to was unimportant and, although he had taken a million steps backwards, he didn't care. It was hilarious. All of the pain he had forced himself through was the funniest thing in the world. When his phone started to ring in his back pocket, he didn't hesitate before fumbling around to answer it. He put it on loudspeaker as he threw his body back onto the bed so he could stare up at the ceiling.

"What's up?" James laughed. And he laughed. And he laughed. Anyone around him would think he had heard the funniest joke in the world when, really, he hadn't.

"James, are you crying?"

"Keith," James giggled at the sound of the name before repeating it multiple times, dragging out the sound in the middle and finding it incredibly amusing. "Keeeeeeith."

"I'm coming over. I'll be there with Lance in a few minutes, okay? Stay where you are."

"No, no, no. I'm fine, Keith. I'm fiiiine."

"I can't believe you." Keith muttered before the line went dead. James dropped his phone onto the bed with enough force for it to bounce up into the air. Somehow, he managed to bounce it into the wall. When it fell against the bed, limp, James didn't spare it a second thought.

A few moments passed before Keith walked into James's room with Lance in tow; he didn't bother knocking.

"You're fucking high. I thought you stopped."

"I did," Keith raised a single eyebrow and shook his head, hardly believing James would bother to lie when he was so clearly off of his head. "I didn't take adderall. I took something so much better."

"Better?" Lance chipped in with a pair of furrowed eyebrows. James howled with laughter as he reached forward and latched onto Keith's shirt. He lumbered forward to sit onto the other's lap, burying his head into Keith's neck as he did so. Keith let out a loud huff before pushing James away. Anyone would have thought James had been slapped around the face with how much hurt appeared in his expression.

When James didn't say anything to Lance and just sat there, pouting like a small child, Keith began to sift through James's pockets. It didn't take long for him to find and pull out the now half-empty bag of weed. "What the fuck, James?"

"I was going insane on my own. I needed something to cheer me up."

"Weed will not make anything better! When are you going to understand that drugs aren't the way to go?"

"When they stop making me feel so goooood."

Keith's jaw clenched and he stared at the wall as if he was ready to punch it. As a precaution, Lance leaned over and laced their hands together so he couldn't even form fists. "You're going to kill yourself if you keep going on like this."

"So what? Let me die," James laughed as if his own death was the funniest thing in the world. With the way Lance and Keith were frowning, it clearly wasn't. "No one cares anyway. I don't have any family and my boyfriend left me for someone else. I'm alone."

"You are not alone. You have us." Lance tried to explain as Keith jolted up and forced their hands apart. He didn't say another word as he walked out of the room.

James snorted as he stared at the spot where Keith had been sitting. "He hates me."

"No, he doesn't. We just don't get it. Why are you being like this?"

"Because."

"Because?"

"I'm alone in this world and I always will be."

"James," When Lance could no longer tell whether James was crying or laughing, he decided that it wasn't the right time to talk. "We can talk about this tomorrow, okay? I need to ask though, was what Keith found all the drugs you had?"

James nodded, tears trailing down his cheeks. Lance thought they were sincere but he couldn't have been certain.

-

Lance found Keith inside the red lion. It took around an hour of Lance searching every possible hiding place before he stumbled across the red paladin in what had almost become a second home. He climbed up the steps and called out Keith's name, forcing a sympathetic smile once he found him.

"Are you crying?" was the first thing Lance was able to say. He sunk down on the floor so he was sat against both Keith in the wall and could offer the optimum amount of comfort. Keith turned his head away but it was too late: Lance had already seen the tears in his eyes. "It's okay to cry. I know your reputation makes you feel like you have to be strong and emotionless all the time but you don't have to. You're allowed to be upset sometimes."

Keith covered his eyes with his hands as his body shook with a series of uncontrollable sobs. Lance had triggered something inside him and made it so he couldn't stop crying, even if he wanted to. He was so used to holding up a defensive wall that he wasn't sure how to control his emotions once they overwhelmed him to the point of tears. "I just don't get it. I want to help him but he keeps doing stupid things like taking- taking weed. Why would he do that?"

"I don't know."

"He keeps saying no one cares about him but people do. I care about him so much. He- He doesn't deserve to go through all of this alone. It's my fault he doesn't even have his dad to help him. I-"

"Shut up. It is not your fault," Lance placed a heavy amount of emphasis on the not to exaggerate his point. "You know what his dad did to him. You saw it firsthand. If he was here, James would only have more problems."

"I just want him to be happy," Keith wiped his nose with his sleeve, staring straight ahead as if that would help the tears subside. "I wanted to love him in a way that would make him happy but I don't. I want to be there for him but it's just so difficult when he won't let me."

"I know but he's going to get through this. There will always be setbacks in recovery and that is just a fact. One day, he will overcome this addiction and I know it. He will get better and, if he doesn't want our help, we force it on him. He needs to understand that we are his friends."

Keith didn't say anything, a sign he silently agreed with what Lance was saying. He continued to stare ahead until Lance pat his side and forced a smile. "Come on, let's go back to your room. We can watch a movie together to cheer you up. We can watch one of your violent movies that I hate."

"Really?" Lance nodded. He stood up and held out his hand to pull Keith up with him. "Will James-"

"He'll be okay for now. I managed to get him to fall asleep."

"But he gets his results tomorrow... what if he freaks out all over again in the morning? I can't- I don't-"

Lance hushed Keith whilst rubbing his arm up and down.