Nicole

Lucas Thompson had my heart, soul and body. But that's nothing new for me; I knew from the moment I met him he was gonna be special in my life. I just didn't know how special.

The weekend with Lucas went by a little too fast for my liking, but then again, I don't think any weekend could be long enough for me to be satisfied with my time with him.

He groaned in pleasure against my neck after cumming inside me for the second time this morning. My moans weren't too soft either as my inner walls clenched around him.

Euphoria took over my senses, all of them heightened, feeling everything  so deeply and so intensely.

I felt the mattress shift under my body as Lucas got out and off of me, and laid on his back, the bed sheets only covering his body's lower half.

Being in the same position as him, I turned my head to his side, glancing at his chest rising and falling at a fast pace. 

"You're amazing. I missed you so much." He breathed and I instantly smiled and dragged my body towards his, throwing a leg over his and resting it in between his.

"I missed you too." His fingers curled around my chin and he lifted it a little while he leaned down and his lips captured mine in a swift movement, the two of us kissing. His lips felt like velvet against mine as they moved in sink and I felt so high on his taste that I felt like I was flying, totally and utterly out of myself.

When we stopped, I simply let my head fall down on the crook of his neck and pressed my lips against his hot, soft skin one more time, knowing all too well how he loved to be kissed there, his sweet spot.

"I don't want you to go again." I tightened my grip around his torso and I felt him tightening his grip around my waist too.

"Me neither. But hey, I only need to be there for class at three. I don't plan on leaving this bed anytime soon."

I laced my fingers with his and focused on the sound of his heart beating against his rib cage and his even breaths.

"I need to talk to you about something."

My eyes shot up in attention, oblivious to what it was that he might need to talk to me about. 

"About what?"

By the look of worry in his face, I knew it couldn't be anything good. 

"Come on, you're starting to worry me, Lucas." 

He shifted in his place, with his palms resting on the mattress he pulled himself up and now he was sitting against the headboard, exhaling, his blue eyes a little darker than his usual clear color.

I rested one palm on the mattress as well and I sit up too, turning towards him. 

"I ran into Sarah last week."

"Who's Sarah?" I asked, totally and completely unaware of which Sarah he was talking about.

"My ex girlfriend."

I pursed my lips into an O shaped form, now realizing what he meant and why he was so worried about talking to me. 

When we met and started going out, we definitely talked about our past and obviously, our exes came into the picture, but he never really went into a lot of details about Sarah. 

"You ran into her here?"

"Yes." He chuckled in disbelief as he answered me. "She was asked to teach at Santa Monica, for six months. She's done that, she's going back to London this week."

"Okay..." Was the only word coming out of my mouth, full of uncertainty.

Why was he telling me this? 

"We talked." 

The slow burn was killing me, I needed him to just blurt it all out in one line. 

"Lucas, where are you going with this?" I asked while I closed my eyes shut, fearing the worst.

"We just... talked. She was just as confused as me that we ran into each other here, in LA."

"That makes three of us, then."

"When I got to the dorm, before you picked me up, I received a text message from her."

"Oh." I drowned my bottom lip in my mouth, refraining from saying anything else. 

"She wants to meet me again and talk to me."

Why on Earth would that bitch want to do that?

"Oh... Can I know why?"

"I don't know actually. That was all she said."

"Oh, okay then."

Lucas sensed the confusion on my voice and his with fingertips tracing patters on my back, he continued.

"I wanted to talk to you about it."

"I appreciate that, I truly do but... I think that's a decision only you can make. You're the one who dated her-"

"Hey, hey... I know that but, I don't know, I thought talking with you about it would help me realize what I wanna do."

"I'm your girlfriend. I'm not going to tell you whether or not you should talk to your ex. If she wants to talk and you don't even know what she has to say, you should be the one choosing if you should hear her out or not."

"I'm sensing a little discomfort on your side."

"Well, it is your ex. Wanting to talk to my boyfriend-" I looked down at the messy bed sheets underneath our legs. Lucas pressed his palm against my cheek and caressed it. 

"She's married now."

"But a couple of months ago I was in the exact same position with Matt and you were nothing but supportive. I'll support your decision, whatever that decision may be." I saved my speech pretty well, if I do say so myself.

"She hurt me, that's a fact. But I'm not the guy to treat someone like they're disposable, even if they've hurt be before. If she wants to talk, I wanna give her a chance to speak up her mind. I just... I wanted to hear your thoughts about it first."

San Francisco was often known for the fog that made its appearance in the early morning, and today was no exception, making this whole scenario I was living in more melancholic, my own emotions matching perfectly with the mystic scenery outside. 

Lucas' blue eyes were penetrating my soul - he was begging me to say something, he wanted me to say something, I could feel it. 

"Would you still marry her if she'd have you?"

But this wasn't what he wanted to hear from me, and his expression confirmed it for me.

"What? Why would that thought even cross your mind?"

"It didn't.... I-I just wanted to ask you, that's all."

"Not in a million years." More than his answer itself, the way he answered so quickly without giving it a second thought made me let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. 

I hated myself for asking that question, and for putting him in that position, but I just had to ask the question that's been on my mind ever since we spoke about our exes and he told me she had denied his marriage proposal. 

"Nicole, I love you. I did love Sarah in the past, and yes, in the past or without you in my life I would probably marry her if she'd want to this time. But not after meeting you, not after you had me falling this deeply in love with you."

I envy Lucas a little. Like, how he can speak up so openly about his feelings or how he can expose himself; I can't do that that comfortably without fearing for myself afterwards. I'm always on the fence, always over analyzing everything, always feeling negative when it comes to me. Being through the break up and then meeting Lucas helped me heal myself, and it helped me love me more, but despite all the work done on myself, I was still far from where I'd like to be. 

I launched myself at him, catching him a little by surprise. With my arms tangled around his neck and my legs on either side of him, my lips' only job was to kiss his, with every ounce of passion and desire I had in my body for the man under me. 

"I love you so much." I said after our lips parted. "I know I don't say that often, and I know I should probably show you a bit more love than I usually do and I know I'm probably the worst girlfriend ever for asking you that question but, I do love you. So much."

My thumbs made circular motions on his cheeks as my hands cupped his perfect face, while at the same time he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. We stayed like this for a while, whispering I love yous to each other, so low that we had to read each other's lips to know what we were saying.

These were the little moments everyone talks about, and I was so thankful to have my little moments with my London boy. I just wished we had little moments like this one forever, for the rest of our lives. 

 * * *

"I mean, we all have exes." Diane shot me a knowing glance before sipping her margarita. 

My best friend and I hadn't had the chance to do one of our girls' night together ever since I moved to London because Trevor is taking up a lot of her time, so as soon as she knew he was going out tonight with his buddies for a bachelor's party, she called me and a few hours later, here I was.

"I know that. But it's never easy to say "go ahead" when your boyfriend tells you his ex wants to talk."

We were sitting on her couch while nursing our drinks slowly, with the TV turned on, on some random music channel with the sound turned low, serving only as background noise. I had both my legs tucked under my butt and Nicole had one leg under hers while the other was hanging on the side of the grey velvet couch.

"So what if she wants to talk? Isn't she married? Relax, Nic."

Now it was my turn to take the triangle shaped glass to my lips and sip the bitter liquid.

"I don't wanna talk about her anymore. How have things been with you and Trevor?"

"Great, actually. You know, he asked me to be his plus one next weekend for his buddy's wedding." The smile on her lips was notorious just by the way she spoke about him, and I found myself smiling instantly. I was so happy for my best friend.

"Oh my God! Di, that's amazing! I could tell he was absolutely crazy about you when I first saw you two."

"Crazy thing is... I am crazy about him too." She raised her eyebrows, almost in disbelief of herself. "I don't let him know that, although I am pretty sure he knows."

"I am so happy that you're happy." I threw my arm around her and hugged her. "Remember when we were teens and said that we'd never find a guy? Look at us now!"

"We got our men with us, I am doing amazing at the firm, you're gonna be a published author... How's that going anyway?"

"It's... going. I had a meeting with an editor last week, she seemed pretty amazing. We talked about my story, money, a book tour eventually."

"What did she say about the story?"

"She said she liked it, but she needs to review it and take it up with the publishers and then proceed to some changes if their needed."

"Changes?" Her blonde eyebrows furrowed in confusion. She leaned towards the coffee table in front of us to put down her glass.

"Yeah. I have a meeting with her and the publishers next month to talk about it, see where they wanna go with the story-"

"Where they wanna go? Changes? Nic, this is your story. You're not gonna make any changes unless you want to!"

The expression of concern and alarm on her face scared me a little, and I was suddenly feeling very scared for what I had just gotten myself into.

"Have you signed anything?"

"No, not yet." I responded as I bit my bottom lip.

"Good. I think I should go with you to that meeting. To set the record straight, see what they're offering you, tell them they can't change your story."

I would appreciate Diane being there a whole lot. It can be a bit intimidating to be all alone with a bunch of publishers and editors - the people who held my future as a writer in their hands. 

"Sure, that'd be good." I said, flashing her a smile filled with insecurities. "Thank you so much."

Diane's specialty when it comes to law isn't by any means representing authors individually  or reviewing  their contracts, - as a corporate lawyer she basically advises large businesses on their legal obligations, rights and responsibilities - but I am thankful that she's willingly helping me out. 

Because God knows I need help. 

 * * *

Author's Note: 

Did I kinda made you wait a whole chapter for you to know what Lucas is doing and STILL not let you know? Maybe 🤭 And oh my God, are we gonna talk about what's happening with Nicole's book or what?!

Please vote, and as always, let me know what you're thinking!

Xoxo, Mars